The Substitute

by Sean Ashcroft

  A wave of tenderness toward him washed over Flynn, his promise to himself that he’d take care of Zach as best he could coming back to him at full force.

  “Right, of course,” Flynn said. “Well, feel free to use me as your scapegoat whenever you need. Hell, I might even do the same. There might be a few perks to being married.” He grinned.

  “Well, I’m seeing a lot of them. Easy way to let down people I’m not interested in, a couch to sleep on right near my school, and you’re making dinner. As husbands go… you’re not so bad.”

  “I’m getting a lot of use out of that cup you made me,” Flynn responded, since they were apparently handing out compliments now. “So I’ve definitely seen a few perks already. My barista is impressed with me for being environmentally friendly. He gave me a free cookie today.”

  “Because he has a crush on you,” Zach said. “Don’t pretend to me you can’t tell.”

  Flynn shifted his weight and focused intently on shredding the basil leaves he’d carefully rolled up for the purpose. He’d seen a chef on TV do this once, and he really hoped it’d look as impressive when he did it.

  Not that he needed to impress Zach, obviously, but he did like the guy. Flynn wanted Zach to think he was as cool as he thought Zach was.

  Zach made things with his hands. Beautiful things. There was no point in pretending that wasn’t impressive.

  “I wasn’t sure,” Flynn admitted. “Maybe he was just being nice to me because I was a regular? But it definitely feels like he flirts with me.”

  Zach chuckled. “Trust your very gay husband on this one. He’s into you.”

  Flynn’s face heated up as he blushed, his ears burning. He’d known. Sort of. Mostly.

  Hell, this wasn’t even the first time he’d discussed it with Zach, though he’d talked about flirting, not actually having a crush on him, which was completely different.

  But hearing it out loud was a little…

  Not embarrassing, exactly. He didn’t mind. It was just…

  Honestly, a surprise that anyone was interested. He hadn’t felt like the kind of guy who was interesting in a while.

  “Maybe I should start wearing that ring,” Flynn mumbled as he scraped basil into his gently-bubbling tomato sauce. “Let him down gently.”

  “I guess I’m gonna have to do that, too,” Zach said. “At least for the semester. Oh, and speaking of, can we hold off on signing divorce papers until I get my first semester grades? Grandma wants to make sure they’re good before giving me the rest of the money.”

  Flynn smiled at that. Violet loved her grandson, and just wanted what was best for him. She was being a little forceful about it, and Flynn didn’t really think it was necessary in Zach’s case, but he got it and he could respect it.

  Hell, he didn’t want to let her down, either. He wanted to make sure Zach really would be okay, though he seemed to have been doing a good job of taking care of himself so far.

  “No problem. I’m not in any kind of hurry,” Flynn said, draining the pasta over the sink. Hopefully this would be good. He hadn’t been expecting company, or he would have made something a little fancier.

  Well, no, he would have made exactly this, but he would have paid more attention to what he was doing.

  He tossed it through the sauce and then split it between two plates, sprinkling the bacon pieces over both of them.

  “That smells amazing,” Zach said as Flynn grabbed the plates to bring them over to the table. “You really are a good husband.”

  “Yeah, don’t pass judgement until you taste it,” Flynn said, though he was sure it’d be fine. He just hadn’t cooked for anyone in a while.

  Stacy had never been all that impressed with his cooking, either. She hadn’t hated it, she’d just… insisted on doing most of it herself. Which had always left Flynn feeling guilty and more than a little useless.

  In hindsight, he could see there were a few more problems with their relationship than he’d noticed while he was in the middle of it. So he could see how Zach hadn’t noticed all the ways Aiden was undoubtedly making him miserable.

  “Tastes good,” Zach said around his first mouthful, apparently hungry. He did seem like the kind of guy who was in the habit of skipping breakfast.

  The urge to make sure he ate better suddenly welled up in Flynn’s chest. The feeling that Zach was one of his people now, one of the people he was supposed to look after, hadn’t gone away. Every time he saw him, it came up all over again.

  Zach appreciated Flynn’s efforts. Even Aiden had at best called him mom when he’d tried to help, and Flynn felt all kinds of complicated ways about that. Zach just accepted his help, more or less without protest, and that…

  That was good for Flynn’s soul. He wanted to be helpful. He wanted to have a big extended family of people who he could look after, because his biological family was now down to Aiden, who’d moved more or less as far away as he could without leaving the country, and…

  And he was lonely, and needy, and Zach made those feelings lift for a little while.

  If he didn’t know better, Flynn would have thought he had a crush on the guy.

  “Glad you’re enjoying it,” he said a moment later. “I should have offered you a beer or something. You want one?”

  “Water would be fine,” Zach said. “I can get it.”

  Flynn shook his head, standing again. “You’re my guest. Let me treat you like one.”

  Zach gave him a soft look, his big brown eyes reminding Flynn of the Labrador puppy he’d befriended at the café a few days ago. “You do too much for everyone and you should take a break,” he said.

  Flynn swallowed. Callie said that to him a lot.

  It was strange to hear it from someone who hadn’t known him all that long. Zach seemed to get him, though, and maybe that was because they seemed to be similar people.

  After all, Aiden had them both conned at one point. They probably had a lot in common.

  Flynn got two glasses and filled them from the jug in the fridge, anyway, because he didn’t really want to think about the way Zach just seemed to see him. Really see him. Understand him, the way Callie did.

  He didn’t have a lot of friends like that.

  Two, apparently. Ten minutes ago, he thought he only had one.

  So this was a nice surprise.

  “I didn’t mean you couldn’t have a beer,” Zach said as Flynn sat back down.

  Flynn shrugged. “I know, but it’s probably better for me if I don’t. Especially since I’m still mad at this client.”

  “You maybe wanna talk about it instead?” Zach asked, looking up at him, clearly ready to listen.

  “I… it’s just… they want me to set up their marketing opt-outs so that users have trouble actually opting out, and that’s… not right. You can’t run a business like that,” Flynn said. “Maybe I’m being stupid. Maybe that’s just what people do and they’ll just find someone else to do it and all I’ve done is talk myself out of a job.”

  “Are you having trouble finding work?” Zach asked, concern in his voice.

  Flynn laughed. “No. Hell no, I’ve got a backlog and a waiting list. I’m grateful. And I guess this clears a spot on the waiting list for something bigger and better, but… I dunno. I was having trouble, once, and I guess I still get nervous when I’m about to fire a client.”

  “I understand that,” Zach said. “And maybe I don’t know everything about this, but it sounds to me like you’re doing the right thing. Which is more or less what I’d expect of you.”

  “Yeah?” Flynn asked, a smile spreading over his face at the thought that Zach already expected him to do the right thing.

  Zach seemed to see the best in people, generally. That was the only way to explain him spending more than a few hours with Aiden.

  “Yeah,” Zach said. “And this pasta is really good.”

  Flynn laughed, even more glad now that Zach had shown up tonight. He could use more people like this in his life, a
nd he definitely wanted to keep this one.

  “Well, what kind of husband would I be if I couldn’t cook for you occasionally?” he said, still smiling to himself.

  It was really nice to have a new friend.

  Chapter Eight

  Zach spent the first few moments after he woke up staring up at an unfamiliar ceiling, wondering where the hell he was.

  A wave of contentment washed over him as he remembered the night before, laughing and talking with Flynn, being provided with blankets and pillows and a couch that folded out into a genuinely comfortable bed. Drifting off to sleep feeling surprisingly safe and loved.

  Flynn had a way of doing that. Zach was just barely scratching the surface of what he was like, but every time he learned something new, it just made him seem even more wonderful. He wasn’t sure how much more of that his heart could take.

  Movement made him sit up, and his eyes widened as they landed on the source.

  Flynn was just closing the bathroom door behind him, nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, dark hair still damp and clinging to his forehead, droplets of water rolling down his very naked skin.

  He looked incredible naked. Sculpted and toned, but not overly muscular. Like a man who went to the effort of taking care of himself, but wasn’t obsessed with his own body. Broad-shouldered, which Zach had known, but hadn’t seen the full impact of until now.

  The firm V of his hip muscles disappeared teasingly into the folds of the towel, and Zach’s eyes followed them with interest, his lips parting just a fraction as the towel shifted, threatening to fall off.

  Zach couldn’t quite stop himself from staring in time before Flynn looked over at him.

  “Morning,” Flynn said, his voice soft and sleep-rough, like he really didn’t care that he was just… standing around in a towel.

  Of course he didn’t. He had no reason to care whether or not Zach was interested in him. He wasn’t interested in Zach, so it didn’t matter.

  At least he wasn’t panicking over it. If only all straight men were as confident in their own sexuality, so that they didn’t get flustered the moment a not-straight one looked at them.

  “Good morning,” Zach responded absently, trying hard not to follow the rivulets of water trailing over Flynn’s body with his gaze.

  “Sleep well?” Flynn asked, so obviously he wasn’t about to run away and cover up.

  Zach was torn between being thrilled and horrified by that. On the one hand, Flynn was beautiful, and he liked beautiful things. He hadn’t gone into art—sculpture, especially—for nothing, and a well-formed man was one of his few true weaknesses.

  If he’d thought Aiden was pretty, he had nothing on Flynn, who was just that little bit older, more solid around his chest and shoulders, more effortlessly confident in the way he held himself.

  Aiden… swaggered, and that had a certain kind of appeal to it, but Zach hadn’t realized how shallow it was until he’d seen Flynn. Flynn, who didn’t need to. Who just radiated confidence and comfort with himself.

  He was stunning.

  On the other hand, heat was pooling in the pit of Zach’s stomach, the first uncomfortable tightness of arousal, and he really didn’t want to ruin the friendship that was blossoming between them. Flynn was a good friend to have, and the last thing Zach wanted was to make things awkward.

  “Uh.” Zach blinked at him, knowing he’d been asked a question but struggling to remember what it had been. Something about… sleeping?

  How well he slept? That seemed logical.

  “Uh, yeah,” he finished. “Sorry, I’m kinda… slow to wake up in the mornings.”

  Flynn smiled a warm, kind smile at him. “I like to get up early, knock out a chunk of what I need to get done for the day before the world wakes up. Then the rest of the day seems a lot more manageable.”

  “You’re probably wiser than I am,” Zach said, and he was sure it was true.

  Flynn was a real grown-up. Mature, and settled, and with his shit well and truly together.

  That wasn’t helping Zach’s increasingly serious crush on him at all, but it was so nice to be around that he wasn’t about to stop appreciating it. There weren’t a lot of real adults in his life. Art people tended to mature slowly.

  That had been part of what Zach liked about them, right up until now.

  “Doubt it,” Flynn said. “I left a fresh towel on the rail for you. It’s heated,” he added, clearly excited about that.

  Zach bit his lip unconsciously. On top of being grown up, Flynn was also adorable and so sweet it made Zach’s teeth hurt.

  “Oh, uh… thanks. I could go for a shower,” he said. He hadn’t really thought about whether or not he’d get the chance, but he’d found a few bathrooms with showers in them on campus, and while that wasn’t his favorite bathing solution, sometimes he was just… covered in clay dust, and it was better not to breathe that in.

  “All yours,” Flynn said. “Should be plenty of hot water left. Pressure’s good for a third floor apartment, too.”

  “Give me a minute to wake up so you don’t have to drag me out of there passed out,” Zach said. He was often in danger of falling asleep under the warm spray of the shower in the morning.

  “What makes you think I wouldn’t just leave you there?” Flynn asked, laughter in his eyes.

  “Literally everything you’ve done up until now,” Zach said. “You’re one of the good guys. You can’t fool me.”

  “I’m glad you think so, because I was actually gonna ask you a favor,” Flynn said.

  “Anything,” Zach responded without hesitating. Flynn had done so much for him already.

  Besides, a favor would be an excuse to see him again, or at least talk to him.

  “Sure you don’t wanna hear it before you agree without conditions?” Flynn asked, his eyes sparkling with laughter.

  “You wouldn’t ask me for anything… weird,” Zach said. “I trust you.”

  “Well… this is a little weird, but I guess I might as well just ask. There’s a networking… thing, this weekend. Kind of a local meetup for people in my industry. It’d be nice to go, I guess, but I’d rather not go alone. It’s really casual and I was thinking about what you said last night about there being perks to being married, and I guess maybe the ring would do most of the job, but…”

  “I’ll come,” Zach interrupted, not wanting Flynn to feel the need to keep rambling nervously. “That’s what you were about to ask, right?”

  “Right, yeah,” Flynn looked down at his feet, and for reasons unknown to Zach, blushed.

  He was ridiculously pretty when he blushed, especially since he was looking down, long, dark eyelashes stark against his cheeks.

  Damn.

  Flynn was the hot brother. Aiden was a pale imitation.

  And Flynn was the nice brother, too, which might have been contributing to Zach’s opinion of how hot he was.

  “Well, I’ll come with you. I haven’t got anything better to do,” Zach said.

  Besides, he’d been right. This meant the chance to spend more time with Flynn, and that was a chance he wanted to take.

  He knew how stupid it was. He knew he didn’t stand a chance. But he still wanted to be close to Flynn, because he felt safe and loved and supported around him, and he hadn’t felt that in a while.

  He hadn’t realized until Aiden left how much he’d been left to support him. Their relationship had been give and take, in the sense that Zach gave and Aiden took, and took, until he had everything he wanted and then just… left.

  And it stung. It still stung, when he thought about it, but Flynn… Flynn soothed the sting.

  And maybe he shouldn’t have been letting himself be comforted by his ex’s older brother, but Flynn didn’t seem to mind comforting him at all. He just did it as though it was the most natural thing in the world. He was the man Aiden could have been, the one Zach had told himself he was, deep down, and maybe one day that would be true.

  But Flynn was that
man right now, and Zach had been thinking about how desperately he wanted a man like that for a very long time.

  He was way past the point of having a crush on him, and it was maybe time he accepted that. Not that it made any difference. Flynn was straight.

  Zach could still enjoy his company, though. Friends were just as good to have as boyfriends. Better, even.

  “I’ll buy you dinner,” Flynn offered, as though Zach hadn’t already agreed. “I mean, the whole afternoon is on me, promise.”

  “Did you not hear the part where I agreed?” Zach asked, confused.

  Flynn wet his lips. “I had a whole series of bribes thought up. I wasn’t expecting you to just… completely agree without getting anything in exchange.”

  “You married me just so I could go back to school,” Zach said, blinking at him. “Dude. You don’t owe me anything and I owe you everything. You don’t need to bribe me.”

  Flynn smiled wryly. “Yeah, well. You’re not the only one with a weird ex,” he said.

  Zach’s heart hurt at the thought. How could anyone do anything less than treat Flynn like the wonderful man he was? How could they not see how lucky they were to have him?

  He didn’t know what the story was there, but he couldn’t imagine anyone having the heart to treat him badly.

  “Well, now you’ve got a weird husband,” Zach said, beaming at him. “But I’ll try to be a good one.”

  Flynn met his eyes, offering him the sweetest, most boyish smile Zach had ever seen on him, the corners of his eyes crinkling. He’d have kind crow’s feet there someday, his good-naturedness etched into his face.

  Zach had to force himself not to stare too long.

  “You’ve been great so far. I’ll leave you in peace and let you shower.”

  Zach nodded, watching Flynn head back into the bedroom and then flopping down on the couch, looking up at the ceiling again. He let his eyes fall closed for a moment, calling up the image of Flynn standing around in a towel as though he had nothing to be ashamed of.