Light as a Feather

by Cameron James

  “We have Arlo this afternoon, and I’m pretty certain he’s going to put us through our paces. You need food to do that.” He said, I looked down at his plate, then at Margo’s, then I stood going towards the food counters.

  I picked up an apple, placing it on my tray, sliding it down to the meals. I picked up a salad that had salmon in it, then a bottle of water.

  “Not bad.” Kian said when I sat back opposite him, I rolled my eyes at him as I picked up my fork.

  “Battement.” Arlo said once we were stationed on the barres. It made me smile how we all rose our leg in front of us in perfect time. “Let’s make it a grand battement.” He said, “ensure this is done with ease.” He said as he stood on the top barre facing us, he lifted his leg to the height of his hip and extended it straight without even a flinch.

  “It must look effortless. Ensure your supporting leg is straight.” He said, it sounded amused as he looked at the boy stood at the front of the barre. “Don’t force your leg higher if you can’t do it.

  We are only in week two, we don’t want anyone injuring themselves this soon into the programme, do we.” He said smiling at us, it made most of us laugh. “Raise your leg as high as you feel it can go. I will come around to each of you and see if you can raise it any higher.” He said, “Grand Battement.” He said, I prepared.

  Grand Battements and other leg extending moves were Max’s speciality, after of course his signature pirouette section, he had told me he’d always been extremely flexible and could extend almost vertical to his body.

  Once every few months we’d spend an entire lesson of mine on extension, on grand battement, on arabesque, on the splits and I had weirdly enjoyed them. Max had told me simply, if you didn’t feel the burn in the back of your legs that meant you weren’t doing it right. He’d made me touch the floor with my legs straight multiple times to show me what the burn should feel like. I could feel the burn in the back of my legs as I rose my leg to the height of my hip, I didn’t push further because I didn’t need to.

  “Very good Jacob.” Arlo said as he got to me, he fixed my fingers then nodded to me. “You must have an extension mad teacher.” He said, I laughed.

  “I do.” I said, he smiled as he moved on.

  ***

  "Kian, this is Connor." I said, using my hands to wave to each of them. "Connor, Kian." I added, Connor smiled at me before looking at Kian, he seemed pleased with what stood before him. I nodded to him making him laugh as Kian waved then turned to where Margo was shouting.

  "Wow." Connor said, I hummed at him,

  "He made me realise I think freckles are cute. Did you know that freckles are cute?" I said, Connor began to laugh,

  "And he does ballet."

  "He does." I said nodding, I heard Connor as he clicked his tongue.

  "Have you seen him naked?" He asked, I laughed as I nodded.

  "I have." I replied, then began to walk away from him, he soon caught up to me.

  "Excuse me?"

  "Amazing." I said, "he can tell you all about his workout schedule and his calorie counting."

  "Oh, he's not boring, is he?" He asked, I shook my head laughing softly as I led Connor to the low couches Kian and Margo had taken a seat at.

  "Not at all." I said, Connor looked at me a bit warily,

  "I genuinely believe today has destroyed my thighs completely." Kian said as he looked from the giant laminated menu towards me, "I mean Madame Rose destroyed them initially, then Arlo was all about the extension." He said, I laughed.

  "You should've been in our pointe class. It was actual torture today." She said, Connor raised an eyebrow at me, I shook my head,

  "I'm not allowed in the pointe class." I said,

  "Well, that's the saddest thing I think I've heard in a while." Connor said, I nodded to him until Margo held her hand up in front of Connor.

  "No, no don't move on, excuse me?" She said, Connor laughed.

  "Jacob might be the best Ballerina I've ever seen."

  "Jacob is a Cavalier." Margo said, then she looked at me, "unless of course you're informing me that you don't have a penis." She said,

  "That was a rather outdated comment Margo." Kian said, I looked at him. "My best friend at home, Elijah, is the best Cavalier I think I've ever seen." He said, then he raised his eyebrows at Margo, "and he most certainly does not have a penis." He added,

  "He's trans?" I asked, Kian nodded to me. "Cool." I added,

  "Elijah can dance en pointe, because obviously he trained as a female, until his transition when he was fourteen, and by then he was pretty good en pointe. He still dances on them sometimes, he enjoys it, but I also think that's why he's such a good Cavalier because he gets it."

  "So, why are you so shit then?" Margo asked, I gasped at her over dramatically,

  "Because I was born to be a Prima Ballerina." I replied, Connor nodded to her

  "I think Jacob should meet Elijah; they'd enjoy each other’s company far too much." Connor said, I laughed as Kian smiled at me.

  "I'm thinking of ordering the biggest pizza on the menu, and I'll spend the extra pound to make my drink alcoholic." He said, I nodded to him as Margo did.

  "I thought your two day was Saturday, Sunday." Margo teased; Kian laughed shaking his head at her in very pronounced shakes.

  "I choose when I eat crap. So, Heaven forbid I might have a salad on Sunday."

  "That is actual sacrilege." Connor said, we all looked at him at the same time, he laughed. "Proper roast dinner on a Sunday or nothing." He said, then smiled at me. "The hot dog."

  "Always, the burger." I replied, he laughed as I grinned at him. "And I will join in you in paying the extra pound to make it alcoholic." I said, Kian whooped at me, making me laugh as I stood from the couch and took the menu with me to the bar. I returned with the pint that was pulled.

  "Oh brave decision." Kian said as I retook my seat, I looked at him as I took a sip out of the pint. "The draught?" He asked, I nodded to him as Connor returned with his own pint. "There is up to two hundred and eight calories, which is just below ten percent of our daily intake." He said nodding, Connor tutted at me, I laughed.

  "Drink your pint, enjoy it." I said, Kian nodded,

  "I concur. Drink it. Enjoy it." He said as he stood himself with his menu, "I will be having vodka." He said, he sounded quite happy about it.

  "And I will be having wine." Margo said as she also stood. "Just eighty-three calories." She said winking at me, I laughed as she walked to the bar herself,

  "They didn't know you do pointe?"

  "Kian did, we share a room obviously. Margo did not, and I planned on keeping it secret for as long as I could."

  "Why?"

  "Because boys don't dance en pointe." I said shrugging at him,

  "I thought Max taught you better than that." He said, I looked away from him then drank more of the pint.

  "So, let me learn more about you." Kian said as he sat back down, a small glass that looked just like coke in his hand,

  "Me?" Connor said, Kian nodded as Margo retook her seat, with a glass of red wine.

  "Yes you. Age, ballet experience?" He said, Margo and I both began to laugh.

  "Eighteen." He replied lifting his pint, "and, all second-hand from Jacob, but I'm totally a Balletomane." He said, then he frowned at me, "right?"

  "Right." I said laughing,

  "What the hell is a Balletomane?" Margo said, I waved my hand in Connor's direction.

  "A fan of ballet. I believe it was created in Russia, in the early nineteenth century."

  "Wow he's well trained." Kian said, I nodded to him.

  "I know." I replied, he laughed.

  "So how did you guys meet?" Margo asked, Connor looked at me briefly, I figure he was trying to gage whether it was okay to tell them, so I nodded.

  "We met when we were four." He said, "because we were placed in the same care home. He got the better room because he's older than me." He added, I laughed.

  "He's
still bitter about this, even though I literally gave my bedroom to him when I was adopted. You lived in it for four years."

  "Yeah, but you got ten out of it." He replied, Kian laughed out loud.

  "Brothers." He said, I looked at him. "You told me you guys would never sleep together. I now understand, because you two are literally brothers."

  "Exactly." I said, Kian smiled at me as Connor laughed.

  "Wait..." Margo said, Connor looked at him, "you were never adopted?" She asked, Connor shook his head,

  "If you don't mind me asking, why?" Kian said, I looked at him as Connor did,

  "Why wasn't I adopted?" Connor asked, "or why was I in care?"

  "The latter?" Kian said, Connor looked down,

  "My parents died when I was three. Car crash. I have no immediate family, or at least I've been told so I went into care."

  "That's so sad." Margo said, Connor shrugged slightly.

  "Don't know, means I have seven brothers and sisters that I'd have never had." He said, I smiled at him, "and I'd have probably never met him." He added nodding to me,

  "Why where you?" Kian asked, I looked at him.

  "My mum didn't want me." I said. "Simple. I was put straight into the system once I was born."

  "Then you were adopted by your ballet teacher?" Kian said, I nodded to him,

  "And his husband." Connor said, so I laughed.

  "I think I got a better al- round deal. I figure if I'd been kept the likelihood of me doing ballet and ending up where I am now, was insanely slim." I said, they both nodded as a waiter appeared.

  "Pizza." He said, we all pointed at Kian who began to laugh as the massive pizza was placed in front of him, "and I have a burger." He said, I raised my hand, then gawped at the two patty tall burger. "The hot dog." He said then placed it down in front of Connor, "and for the lovely lady chicken tenders." He said, then winked at her as he placed it down, we all watched him walk away.

  "You all like boys..." Margo said, I began to laugh as Connor and Kian nodded back to her.

  "Yes, he was totally hitting on you." Kian said, Margo smirked.

  "How likely do you think it is that I have a chance with him tonight?" She asked, I looked behind the bar, as our waiter stood cleaning the same spot over and over whilst looking at her,

  "Pretty high." I said, then looked back at her as she bit her lip.

  "Eat your food, you can't have sex on an empty stomach." Kian said,

  "Sound advice." Connor replied.

  “Malibu.” Kian said, holding the glass that looked like coke to me, I took it warily. “I think you’d like Malibu.” He added grinning at me, I decided to trust him. I took a sip out of the glass. I also decided that I liked Malibu.

  “Coconutty.” I said, Connor laughed as he took the bottle of beer off Kian, who had a second vodka and coke.

  “I didn’t think she’d just go for it.” Connor said, Kian began to nod as sat beside Connor on the couch.

  “Last weekend.” He said, I turned to look at him. “She found a guy, probably about twenty, and went through every stage of a relationship in like twenty minutes. I was bloody impressed.” He said, we all laughed. “I also totally appreciated how relaxed she was about sex.”

  “Yeah?” Connor said, so I looked at him I almost smiled.

  “Yeah. I mean I’ve had sex, and I think I’m good at it.” Kian said, I bit my lip so I wouldn’t laugh because I truly couldn’t work out who was flirting with who more. Margo with the bartender, or Kian with Connor. “But I can’t be that casual. At all.”

  “No, I totally agree.” Connor said, I raised an eyebrow at him, he shushed me before looking back at Kian.

  “You’ve?”

  “Yeah.” He said, I rolled my eyes and drank more out of my glass. I finished it in two gulps. “But like you said, I cannot be casual.”

  “Right.” Kian said, then looked at Connor. “Good.”

  “Good?” Connor replied, they both awkwardly sipped from their drinks.

  “My god.” I muttered, it made Connor laugh, and he did until he looked at me. I looked up and back at him as my hand went to my stomach, because something was definitely not right in there.

  “Alright?” he said, I frowned at him then shook my head and stood walking away from the little couches and into the men’s room.

  I threw up as soon as I got into a stall.

  Both, Kian and Connor turned to look at me when I returned to them, I sat back down meekly then turned to look in the direction of the bar.

  “Oh I take it she got him then.” I said, Connor laughed so I looked at him.

  “Feeling okay?” Connor said, I sighed.

  “Likes Malibu but can’t handle it I guess.” Kian said, I looked down. “Don’t be embarrassed, be happy you aren’t drunk.” He said amused, it made me smile.

  “Yeah, she got him. She didn’t even have to try hard. I don’t know if I’m impressed or ashamed.”

  “Ashamed?” Connor said laughing, Kian began to laugh back.

  “Ashamed that I do not have those skills.” He said, they both began to laugh as I did too, it faltered when a waiter appeared, he placed a jug of water on the table. I looked up at him as he nodded to me, smiling as he did. I frowned at the jug, then frowned at Kian and Connor.

  “Figured you might want some water.” Kian said, then he smiled at me, I smiled back then lifted the jug and poured it into the glass.

  It felt extra nice to fall into my bed, so I lay there my hands on my head as I yawned, turning my head towards the bathroom when the light clicked off. I put my glasses back on watching as Kian walked across the room to his bed, he looked at me as he got in. We seemed to have a stare off for a while.

  “How do you feel?” he asked, I shrugged. “Good. No getting up to throw up during the night.” he said, I laughed into my arms then shook my head.

  “I don’t know what it was, just felt funny. I’m not drunk.”

  “Nah, you’re not drunk.” He said, I laughed, then took my glasses back off, so I could lie comfortably on my pillow. “I want to be honest with you.” He said, I hummed back at him because sleep was beginning to sound like the best decision right now. “I thought about having sex with your best friend, multiple times tonight.” He said, I laughed, I knew it. “So, were do we stand on this?”

  “Stand on it?” I asked, he hummed but I figured his nod was highly animated.

  “Do you care if I actively seek out sex with your best friend?” he asked, I laughed.

  “It depends.” I said, then I opened my eyes and looked in his general direction. “Break his heart and you die.”

  “Of course.” He agreed,

  “I take it, it wouldn’t be… casual.” I said, Kian laughed softly.

  “No course not. He’d have to like me back that’d be a good starting point.” He said, then he sighed.

  “You have my blessing.” I said, he laughed.

  “Thank you.” He replied, “you didn’t tell me he was gorgeous.”

  “It’s not a word I think of when I talk about Connor. To be honest.”

  “Start thinking it.” he said, I laughed.

  Max smiled amused at me as I danced step by step with the immediate pointe class. I’d stood behind them as they worked through an ensemble piece Max liked to teach from Swan Lake.

  “Beautiful work girls. Next week we’re going to look at the solo of the Sugar Plum Fairy.” He said, then he laughed. “Following we’ll do a song from this century.” He added, all the girls whispered ‘yes’ in front of me, I laughed, then bowed as the girls curtseyed. Max nodded to them letting them go as he went to the sound system.

  “So, how’s the big ballet school then?” Maisie asked as she walked towards me, I laughed.

  “Big.” I replied, she grinned at me.

  Maisie had been in the home with Connor and I, she was three or so years younger than me and had been adopted a year after I had. From what I could tell, she adored her adoptive parents, and they
loved her. They had enrolled her into Max’s ballet school a few months after the adoption was confirmed, it was a complete coincidence that she had been enrolled into Max’s class. I only found this out when she moved up to immediate pointe last year, and we’d both exclaimed loudly and shocked that we knew each other.

  “Just… big?” she replied raising her eyebrow at me, I laughed,

  “Amazing.” I said nodding, “every minute of every day is just ballet.”

  “I thought your life was like that anyway.” She said amused, I smiled back at her.

  “Yeah. It kind of is.” I said, she laughed, then turned as the little group of girls I usually saw her spending break with called her over. “Go on. I’ll tell you all about ballet school another time.” I said, she grinned then she hugged me, and ran off.

  “You’re very good at the ballerina part of Swan Lake.” Max said as I stood beside him, I leant against the barre to take my pointes off.

  “Is that a compliment?” I asked, Max laughed.

  “I’d say so.” He said, then he smiled at me, I looked down as I smiled back. “Frankie and Cory are coming for tea. Just to warn you in advance.” Max said as he packed up his bag and put it over his shoulder, I looked up at him.

  “Thanks. I’ll prepare myself appropriately” I said, he laughed as we left the studio.

  Frankie and Cory were loud. Together with Max, I figured it made them louder. They were all school friends. Frankie and Max having been in the same class, and roommates for the seven years of school, and Cory being in the year above them.

  The story was as old as time, Frankie and Cory had started dating when Frankie was sixteen, and Cory seventeen, they’d been together ever since.

  Whenever Max spoke about their relationship, he always did it with a smile on his face. Cory had gotten a role in the Australian Ballet Company when he left the National Ballet School, and according to Max, had to be away up to six months at a time for his contracts, whilst Frankie stayed in London and danced in multiple ballet productions. Cory finished his contract almost ten years ago, after doing it for five years, and he opened up his ballet shop, they were married a few years later.