Not Exactly Lying

by Melody Summers

  Every kid in school seemed to be crammed into the cafeteria, most of them dancing in the space which had been cleared in the middle of the floor. Some of the tables and chairs had been left out around the edges, decorated with balloons and confetti. Almost all of the chairs were occupied by people who looked as uncomfortable and out of place as I felt. The lights had been dimmed, while multicolored lasers and strobe lights pulsed in time to the beat of the music pumping from the big speakers at the back of the room.

  It was overwhelming to walk into, and my anxiety swelled until it became an uncomfortable pressure in my chest. I gripped Quinn’s hand harder, and he flashed me a smile to bolster my confidence.

  “Just breathe, babe. It’s okay.”

  That was good advice. I forced myself to take slow, deep breaths and concentrated on him. He was tall enough to see over most of the crowd, and after a minute searching he pointed.

  “There they are.”

  I let him draw me around the dance floor, winding past couples grinding against one another in a way that had me ready to blush. Was that what they did at these things? No way was I going to do that. I almost tripped over a balloon and had to kick it out of the way. I couldn’t see anything except the crowd, because I was about eye level with most of their shoulders, and Quinn’s broad back. That gave me another guilty little thrill. The boy could fill out a shirt. But I held onto his hand for dear life, knowing that if I lost him in that mob and got stuck there all on my own I’d have the world’s worst panic attack. Why had I agreed to this again? Oh, yeah, because Quinn.

  We ended up at the end of the cafeteria where they’d set up tables with refreshments—chips and sodas in coolers. No Mountain Dew, though, darn it. Delaney was there with Walker, and Dannika with Ashton, and I slid into the middle of them with a sigh of overwhelming relief.

  “You got her!” Delaney cried.

  “I was persuasive,” Quinn said with a teasing smile.

  Dannika grabbed my other arm and squeezed it. “I’m so glad you came. How are you holding up?”

  “If I had a worst nightmare, it would probably look just like this. Where’s Allison?”

  “Out dancing with Brett. I still can’t believe she wouldn’t ask Seth.”

  “He had to work,” Walker said.

  Delaney grabbed his hand. “Let’s go dance.”

  Together they pushed their way into a relatively open spot nearby and began to move. Their dancing wasn’t nearly as hardcore as what I’d seen on the way in. It looked almost doable. Almost.

  Ashton smiled at Dannika. “Shall we?”

  They went to join the others, leaving me standing alone with Quinn, who raised an eyebrow.

  “No way.” I told him.

  “Why not?”

  “Um, let’s see. Because I’ve never danced before and I don’t want to make a fool out of myself in front of the entire school?”

  “Look at them, babe,” he said, waving a hand at the swarm of people gyrating before us. “No, I mean really look. They’re all wrapped up in themselves. No one’s paying attention to anybody else.”

  He was right, as he usually seemed to be. That made me feel better and less on the spot. Still…

  “Did you get all dressed up and come all this way just to stand in the corner, or do you want to get the full effect? Since it is your first high school dance and everything.”

  Stupid logic. Why did he have to keep making sense? I sighed and held out my hand.

  “Be gentle.”

  “Always.”

  We went over to the others, who spread out to make room for us to join them. Delaney and Dannika were both grinning at me like a pair of lunatics.

  “Not. One. Word.” I growled.

  Delaney made a zipping motion across her lips and Dannika winked. I looked at Quinn, who seemed so relaxed and confident, and tried to draw some of that from him. I could do this. After watching the others for a minute I started moving in what I hoped was a credible imitation. It was awkward at first, but then I remembered what Quinn had told me on the way in. Focus on me, not everyone else. I locked my gaze on his face and lost myself in its smooth planes and firm angles, the set of his bright blue eyes, and his plush, kissable lips. That was much better. The music flowed through me and I loosened up, my movements becoming more fluid, and by Quinn’s expression of approval I guessed I was doing okay. Right then his opinion was the only one I cared about, anyway.

  We danced through two more songs before heading back to our corner to take a break. Quinn leaned over so that his breath tickled my ear.

  “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

  “No, it wasn’t. Thank you.”

  I met his eyes, looked deep into those fathomless sapphires, and knew that I was toast. I wasn’t falling for him. I’d already fallen. Now I had to worry about the impact when I hit. He returned my look with a grin that made my toes tingle.

  “Just have a good time, babe.”

  So I did. I danced with him for the rest of the evening, though we traded off a couple of times with our friends just for fun. That wasn’t bad, either, because I trusted both of them. Then the DJ put on a slow song and Quinn reclaimed me from Walker. His arms went around me and pulled me in close.

  “I don’t know how to do this,” I protested.

  “It’s easy. Just let go and let me lead for a change.”

  “Okay.”

  I leaned further into him and rocked to the music, reveling in the rich, spicy smell of his cologne and the secure embrace of his arms, and let my eyes drift shut. A second later they popped back open and I stumbled over my own feet.

  “What do you mean for a change?”

  His eyes widened and a look of guilt swept across his fine features.

  “Quinn?”

  “Keep dancing, Valkyrie.”

  That wasn’t too hard when I caught back up to the rhythm. I wasn’t remotely interested in getting away from him. In fact, I was pretty sure I’d already developed a severe addiction to him holding me. I was seriously screwed.

  “How long have you known?”

  “I started getting suspicious at the beach party. Your voice was familiar, and I couldn’t get over how out of character that whole thing was for you. Then when we were playing and you walked me into the ambush and accidentally shot Dylan in the back of the head, I knew. And I knew you were the girl for me.”

  I sighed against his chest. “I’m really not her, you know.”

  “Babe, I told you before that you couldn’t be her so well if she wasn’t there inside of you. I see her every day in the incredible new girl you’ve grown into this year. And you wouldn’t be here with me right now if she wasn’t a part of you.”

  Wow. I hadn’t thought of it that way before. Maybe there was a little of her in me after all.

  “You’re not mad?”

  “Would I be here if I was?”

  “I’m sorry. There were times I really wanted to tell you. I just…”

  “I know, babe. It isn’t like you lied about it or anything. It was a secret and you kept it to yourself is all.”

  What do they call that? A lie of omission? “I’m still sorry. I should have told you that night on the beach.”

  “What was that all about, anyway?”

  “Walker didn’t tell you?”

  He shook his head. “Walker doesn’t ever tell his friends’ secrets.”

  “Andrea White.”

  His brows furrowed in a puzzled frown. “I don’t get it.”

  “She’d been telling people she was going to make a serious play for you that night. And I didn’t want her to have you.”

  He gave a soft laugh. “She didn’t have a chance. The only girl on my mind was Valkyrie.”

  “Oh.” I felt almost as stupid as the Dumbest Blonde in Texas I’d pretended to be.

  “You sure caught my attention, though. If I’d known Valkyrie was Molly instead of just suspecting, I never would have let you get away from me.”

  “So
now what?”

  “Well, now you know I’ve been keeping your secret for you, and I haven’t had the slightest interest in any other girl for months—which as you know is unusual for me. I was hoping that you might relent a little and give us a chance.”

  By then it was too late to say no, even if I still wanted to. And I didn’t. He had my whole heart now, so I just had to trust him not to break it.

  “I’ll give you a chance,” I replied, wrapping my arms more tightly around him. “Please don’t make me regret it.”

  “Never.”

  I really had no choice left but to believe him. I was too far gone.

  Later it got really hot with so many bodies jammed into not enough space, but we stayed and danced anyway until they closed it down. I was too overwhelmed by everything that had happened to be anxious and practically floated to his truck, even though by then I was exhausted.

  “Are you free tomorrow night?” he asked on the way home.

  “Sure. Why?”

  “Want to go out?”

  My heart did a funny little flip. “Like, on a date?”

  “That’s the general idea, yes.”

  Quinn was asking me out again—and this time I didn’t have to say no. I laughed at this sudden exhilarating freedom.

  “I’d love to.”

  “How about I pick you up at six and we go have dinner, and then we’ll go get ice cream or coffee afterwards and just hang out together for a while. I’d like to know more about the girl behind these secret identities, and I’ve got about a million questions I want to ask you.”

  One-on-one time with Quinn, without having to hide or pretend. It sounded like Heaven to me. Besides, I wanted to get to know him better, too. I had a feeling that the more I found out, the better I’d like him.

  “I’m fine with that. Wow, my first date.”

  He pulled up in front of my house and turned off the engine. “Nope. This is our first date.”

  “We didn’t go to the dance as just friends?”

  “No.”

  “Good.” I slid across the seat and nestled up against him, remembering how bold I’d been that night on the beach. “Because you said next time it was my turn.”

  I pulled him down to me until our lips met. Quinn’s hands went to the sides of my face and he kissed me so gently and sweetly that I thought I was going to melt.

  “I really am crazy about you, Molly,” he whispered. “I promise I won’t hurt you.”

  “I believe you.”

  His grin could have lit up our football stadium. “It’s about time.”

  This time when he kissed me he put some heat into it and didn’t stop until I was seeing stars.

  “I don’t know how, but those seem to get better every time,” I gasped.

  “Yeah. And here I didn’t think anything could top that night on the beach. You’d better go in, or else we’re going to be out here all night. Come on, I’ll walk you to the door.”

  I held his hand again as we went up the sidewalk, and it felt so right to be with him that I knew I’d done the right thing.

  Chapter Twelve

  Delaney came over Sunday afternoon to help me pick out an outfit. I’m not sure who was more excited, me or her.

  “I still can’t believe you finally took the plunge,” she said, bouncing up and down on my bed like a little kid as I frowned at myself in the mirror. “This is so awesome. Now we can double date.”

  I made a sound of disgust. “So I’ll have to watch you and Walker drooling all over each other all night? Yeah, that sounds like fun.”

  “Ha! I saw how you and Quinn were at the dance. People who live in glass houses…”

  She probably had a point about that. “Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Most likely we’ll go out a couple of times and he’ll realize I’m the most boring person on Earth and dump me for someone more his speed.”

  I held up a multicolored pastel dress in front of me and turned back and forth.

  “Oh, that’s cute,” she said.

  “You think it’s okay? What about the blue one?”

  “Go with the first one. It’s really cute and more casual. Save the blue one for when he’s taking you out to do something special.”

  I regarded the pastel dress with a dubious eye. “Are you sure?”

  “Look, this is just a dinner and getting-to-know-each-other date. Don’t make a huge production out of it. The idea is to have a good time and get more comfortable being around each other.”

  “It just doesn’t seem to be enough. Will he even notice me in this?”

  I’d seen the girls he’d gone out with before. They dressed hot and sexy, not cute. I didn’t want to disappoint him, didn’t want him to be embarrassed to be seen with me. More than anything I wanted him to be ecstatically happy he was out with me.

  “Molly,” she said, her voice serious now, “have you even noticed the way he looks at you? He’s crazy about you. You could show up wearing a burlap sack and he wouldn’t care.”

  “Somehow I doubt that.”

  “If it was anybody else I’d agree with you, but Walker says he’s never behaved like this with anyone else before.”

  “Oh? What else does he say?”

  “Not much. You know Walker. I can never get any good gossip out of him. But he did say that he’s never seen Quinn play ball the way that he has since you’ve been coming to the games. The first thing he does every time they run onto the field is ask whether you’re there in the stands.”

  A warm, gooshy sensation spread out from my heart. “All right. The pastel it is.”

  I was still terrified I was going to do something to embarrass myself in front of him and make him have second thoughts. Restaurants were not my strong suit. I always felt on display and terribly uncomfortable then lost my appetite and ended up picking at my food.

  “Don’t worry,” she told me. “It’s all going to be fine. You’ll see.”

  “What about my hair?”

  “Nothing fancy; just clip it back. The style goes with the dress, and you get that whole casual, summery thing going for you.”

  She stayed with me and played Mario Kart until about 5:30, so I only had half an hour to stress myself sick before Quinn showed up. He knocked on the door about five minutes early, and coming to the door to pick me up that way scored him some major brownie points with Mom. I could tell from the smile that threatened to split her face in two that she more than approved of my choice of boyfriend.

  Did I really have a boyfriend? I wasn’t sure of the protocol. Were we just dating to see if we fit, or had we kind of skipped that step? Maybe Quinn would drop a clue while we were out.

  When we got into his truck I thought he might try to kiss me, but he just relaxed his wrists on the steering wheel and smiled.

  “You look beautiful, Molly.”

  “Thanks,” I replied, my face heating up with a blush.

  Delaney was right about the way he looked at me, like someone had just handed him the entire treasure from King Tut’s tomb or something. I didn’t understand exactly what it was that he saw in me, but I wasn’t about to argue with it.

  He was wearing black Dockers with a green and white striped button down shirt—nice, but not overdoing it to try and knock my socks off. Not that he needed to try. Quinn was simply scrumptious the way he was. I guess that’s what Delaney had been trying to tell me earlier. I smiled back at him, trying to hide the fact that I had a swarm of butterflies in my stomach who seemed intent on migrating.

  “You look good, too.”

  He nodded. “So what sounds good to you? Mexican? Italian? Chinese? American?”

  I honestly hadn’t given it a thought. I was far too nervous to be hungry, even though I’d only nibbled at my lunch.

  “Um… Mexican?”

  “How about Esperanza’s?”

  I felt a stirring of interest. Mom had dragged me there a couple of times, and the food was amazing.

  “Sounds good to me.”
<
br />   We kept it to small talk on the drive, saying nothing about last night, or relationships, or kissing. It was all school and the upcoming game against one of the bigger schools from Corpus and things like that—neutral topics which helped keep me from freaking out. Even so, my hands were shaking as we got to the restaurant.

  Remembering the night before, I focused in on Quinn instead of all the other people who might have been staring at me and judging. What’s he doing with her? Who walks like that? Where’d he find a girl that short—pick her up at a middle school? Stupid brain.

  A hostess seated us—a hot girl in a black cocktail dress—but I don’t think Quinn even saw her. He kept up the light conversation with me the whole time, even carrying on when I was too tongue-tied to respond. To my relief he had them put us in a secluded booth in the back where there was no one else around, and as I took my seat my pulse dropped to a level that didn’t threaten to blow out my arteries.

  “It’s not so bad, is it?”

  “No.” And it wasn’t, at least if I could think of enough things to say during dinner that didn’t sound stupid, and didn’t knock over my water glass, and didn’t spill food in my lap…

  “Hey.” He reached over and covered my hand with his, a comforting warmth that quieted my racing thoughts. “It’s just the two of us having a quiet dinner. Nothing to worry about, nothing to stress over.”

  I nodded and took a gulp of my water. It was going to be okay.

  “You can do this,” he said. “It’s a lot easier than the dance or going to the games.”

  “Yeah, I know. I’m all right.”

  Our waitress bustled up. She was a very pretty girl with legs about a mile long in a short, frilly dress, and this time Quinn did notice.

  “Hey, Sylvia.”

  I recognized her then as was one of the officers on the drill team. She beamed down at us.

  “Quinn, you two are the cutest couple ever.”

  “I think so, too,” he replied with obvious satisfaction.