Reluctant Surrender

by Riley Murphy

  “Yes!” She looked so relieved he almost felt bad.

  “There’s your reason.”

  “Are you telling me you want me to do it, so you can hold me to the words I write?”

  “Yes.”

  When she made a face that said, dammit all he bit back a grin. “I want you to take your computer to the office and do as I told you to do the first time.”

  “Did you even give those sentences a chance? They were very insightful. Thought-provoking even.”

  “Thought-provoking?” This time he didn’t hide his grin. “Those lines read like a third grade primer.”

  She gasped and then glared. Shit, she was adorable.

  Swiveling around, he tapped the computer and said, “And I quote, ‘The boss, secretary scene was very titillating.’” He swung back around and eyed her.

  “What? What’s wrong with that?”

  She was going to have to give in, otherwise—

  “I know what you’re thinking.”

  No she didn’t, because if she did she’d swipe the computer off the counter and march her fine little ass back to the office to please him.

  “Your stare isn’t scaring me.”

  Yes it was. He could tell by the way she was fidgeting.

  “You think I did write those essays, but I was too scared to show them to you.”

  Hmm. This was interesting.

  “You think that I chickened out at the last minute and—oh, for heaven’s sake.” She leaned around him and clicked a few keys on the keyboard. “There! You happy?”

  He didn’t need to look to know he’d find the three detailed accountings he’d originally asked for. “Come here.” He spread his knees and drew her in between them. “Yes, Colin. This makes me very happy.”

  “I’m glad one of us is,” she grumbled and when he turned to start reading she moved to step away.

  “No, stay here.” He gathered her in closer, encouraging her to lean against him. “Stay while I read what you wrote.”

  He moved to tuck her head under his chin and when he started reading she buried her face into his neck and mumbled, “I’m so embarrassed.”

  “Shh…” Gently stroking the small of her back, he said, “Let me concentrate.”

  He knew the moment she settled. The nervous energy drained out of her and her breathing slowed to a steady pace.

  By the time he’d finished with her assessment of the office scenario he knew without a doubt she had no reason to be embarrassed. She’d nailed her triggers perfectly and explained her thoughts in the most poignant and graceful way imaginable.

  “You’ve written this beautifully, Colin. Far different from your blog’s humorous style. That’s well done too, but this?” He leaned back and shrugged to get her to come away from his chest and look up at him. “This is special.”

  “Thank you.”

  Leaning down, he kissed her forehead. “Let me finish reading these and then we can discuss them.”

  She nodded and without the slightest hesitation she slid her arms around his waist and melted into him. He held his breath, savoring her first uninitiated surrender and when she continued to hug him tight, as if she’d never let him go, he released the air in his lungs and enjoyed the peace that washed over him.

  Five minutes later, he gave her his full attention. “I think you understand the Dominant/submissive power exchange better than you think you do.”

  “Maybe,” she said and her words heated his chest. “But you still have to explain a few things. Like kale for example.”

  He wasn’t going to let her charm her way out of discussing the issue. “After reading your thoughts on paper and pairing them with my own, I think it’s safe to say you prefer to be forced by a man of absolute authority. This is why you’ve had difficulty finding yourself a partner. Your attraction or erotic button is only pressed when you’re in the presence of a stronger-willed person than you.”

  “Is this what you do with your stronger will?” Her head fell back and she looked up at him. He stared down at her until she added, “You teach your women to please you the way you liked to be pleased?”

  “No, the different ways you please me will be yours alone. And I know you probably think otherwise but there aren’t women in my life. I’m probably more monogamous than most vanilla men my age.”

  “No.”

  “Yes,” he replied just as emphatically, giving her a squeeze. “Because unlike most men, I’m purposeful in my choices. Conscious of what and who I want before I pursue a relationship with them. For me, good sex is something I’d rather forgo if I can wait longer for great sex to happen. There is nothing special in just good.”

  “I get it. Release the Kracken.”

  “What?” He leaned back to look down at her and she nodded.

  “I did this blog post once about how if everyone had a Kracken there’d be no specialness about it. I mean, everyone from Uncle Gary to your neighbor Tom would be releasing their Kracken over stupid things. Someone cuts you off on the highway, release the Kracken. Someone lets their dog do his business on your lawn, release the Kracken.” This time she did the voice and he felt the need to stop her before she dropped another one of her fascinating analogies on him.

  “Got it. Yes, I suppose that’s what I mean to an extent, but the more important part of what I was saying is that it’s a privilege to share my bed and if I let just anyone between my sheets the privilege becomes commonplace.”

  “Kracken,” she piped up. She was snuggling back up against him when she stilled. “Wait, what about that night in the silk room?” Her tone went higher by an octave or two. “Methinks someone was ready to privilege me.”

  “It would have been a rare occurrence.”

  She toyed with a button on his shirt. “Why?” He didn’t answer right away and that impulsiveness of hers kicked in. “Why me?”

  Taking a deep breath, he said, “Do you remember our first conversation?”

  “At the preopening?”

  “No our first. On the phone. Two weeks prior.”

  She stood and stepped out of the circle of his arms. Obviously she was interested. “Yes. Why? We hashed out certain details didn’t we?”

  “Yes.” He leaned back with his arm on the counter. Hooking a heel on the rung of the stool, he admitted, “I had to call you because you’d already refused to do what Ted and David had asked you to do.”

  She frowned. “I did?”

  “Yes. You were determined to start the shoot at the gates, remember? Only we didn’t want you to.”

  Waving her hand she made a pffft sound. “Oh, that? It was no biggie.”

  He came forward and pinned her with a direct stare. “It was to us. Me more precisely, and I can’t tell you how fascinated I was when I discovered my two business partners, who make it their personal crusade to bend women to their wills, couldn’t get one pain-in-the-ass blogging photographer to change her set location even after she was asked nicely to do so.”

  “Huh.”

  She really was a piece of work. Standing there pretending she couldn’t imagine herself being so obstinate. “So, being forced to call you, I wasn’t happy about it until I had you on the phone. That’s when everything changed for me.”

  She tilted her head. “It did?”

  “Yes. Would you like to know why?”

  “Sure.”

  “You said no.”

  “I did?”

  He nodded.

  “Well, you won in the end. Because I eventually agreed to use the backdrop of the fountain. Didn’t I?”

  “It took me seven minutes and thirty-three seconds to make you comply.”

  She mouthed the word “wow”. It wasn’t the first time she’d done that. He was almost getting used to her expressive displays. “You timed it?”

  “Yes I did. It was the best stand-off I’d had in years. And when you finally capitulated there was a soft inflection in your voice. The kind of tone I pay particular attention to because when I hear t
hat it says to me, ‘I defer to you. I give in. I surrender.’”

  Her mouth dropped open. “You got all that from one okay?’”

  “Yes, and I heard that same ‘okay’ from you today.” She looked as though she were getting uncomfortable, so he asked, “Tell me something you’ve learned about yourself since being here.” He expected her to say something flip or glib, like she hated kale chips or wanted the bigger desk. When she came and sat on the stool beside him and drummed her fingers on the counter he practically held his breath. She was giving her answer serious thought before she offered it.

  “I’m hoping you’ll understand this when I say I feel like I’m on vacation being around you. You make me calm or something. It’s really weird.”

  “It’s structure.”

  Her fingers stopped tapping and she grumbled, “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  “Why do you do that?”

  She swung around. “What?”

  “Turn away when you talk? I don’t like it.”

  Her eyebrows rose.

  “I don’t like that either.”

  She blew her cheeks up and then let the air seep out between her lips like a leaky tire. “You make me nervous. Sometimes. I don’t mean like all the time. But God,” falling forward she held out her arms, “you’re so…”

  “Mysterious?” he offered, hoping to throw that back at her and put her at ease. He knew what kind of a hard time she was having. She had acute feelings he wasn’t allowing her to act on and being as stubborn, impulsive and intelligent as she was, it had to be killing her. All in all, he figured she was doing great.

  Of course, right about now you wouldn’t know it. She straightened up slowly and countered, “I was going for bossy, but I’ll work with you on this one. And that said, what have you learned since I’ve come here?”

  The way she flicked off an imaginary piece of lint from her shoulder and was barely paying him any mind at the moment told him she didn’t think he’d admit to learning jack squat about anything. “You’re a lost little girl, Colin, with a hole in your heart. Thanks to your father.” He trailed a finger from her neck to her left breast. “The moment he broke your mother’s heart he crushed you.” Gently patting the area on her chest, right where her heart beat he told her, “I’ve found it, Colin, and I intend to fill it with something that is for you alone.”

  He watched while she tried to decide how to handle this curve ball. He was expecting her inner brat to rise to the occasion and he wasn’t disappointed.

  “Sorry to tell you there, buddy, but I’m so over my dad and his little troglodyte, it ain’t funny.”

  Taking a deep breath, he stretched out his back. “Not ain’t. Isn’t. And I’m not your buddy.” She narrowed her eyes at him and he warned, “Careful, Colin.”

  “Why? You gonna make me eat more of those disgusting chips?”

  “No. I’m going to leave you to yourself for a while.”

  When he stood, she sputtered, “W-what? Where are you going?”

  He didn’t answer that question, but offered, “When you’re in a better frame of mind I’ll be available. Until then I won’t.”

  He walked away. Without a backward glance or giving her second chance, he left her. It was hard, because he knew she couldn’t help herself, but to his way of thinking, she had to. She needed to learn how to deal with that part of her personality because so far in her life she hadn’t. A byproduct of her guilt-ridden father. Clearly he let her get away with her sass and belligerence. That wasn’t going to be tolerated on his watch. She needed to come to him if they were to tame this bratty side of her personality. And tame it they would.

  Once in his room, he took a moment. He needed to have all his wits about him because she was going to show up and when she did he wanted to be perfectly positioned on the bed. In preparation, he plumped the pillows behind his back, stretched his legs out and waited. He used the time to go over some paperwork Alistair had given him.

  When she knocked he checked his watch and smiled. That hadn’t taken long. He tossed the papers aside and slid down in the bed.

  Knock, knock.

  “Ethan?”

  He didn’t answer. Instead he closed his eyes, sprawled out totally relaxed.

  “Ethan?” The door creaked opened and he didn’t move. He barely breathed. He wanted her close. “Ethan?” It sounded as if she were coming forward. It also sounded as if she were worried. “Ethan!”

  It was all he could do to remain still and calm. She was close. Real close now. He waited until she was right beside him and then he pounced. Springing up, he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her over him, letting her slide seductively across him until she landed flat on her back beside him. Leaning over her he growled, “Gotcha. Right where I want you.”

  He was expecting her to demand her release. Scream bloody murder. Hit him. So when she only scrunched her nose up and looked him dead serious in the eyes and said, “Really?” he deflated.

  His forehead came down to hers as he whispered, “Yes, really.”

  She didn’t move. She didn’t speak, but her pleased smile was enough of an invitation for him to reach up and sink his hands in her hair. God, her hair sprang to life under his touch. “Your hair is so soft.”

  “It’s—”

  He didn’t let her finish telling him that it was a curse. Instead, he pushed her chin up with his thumb and kissed her. Long and slow. Sapping any resistance from her. She tasted sweet, like warm peaches and honey. The flavor of her burned him to the core, firing his need to possess, but he had to go slow. Be careful. Reluctantly he broke from her lips and nudged the side of her cheek with his jaw. “Umm…you taste good.” Dipping down, he caught her earlobe between his teeth and pulled.

  “Hey.” Her shoulder came up in a shrug as she sensually rubbed her ear against where he’d tugged. The unconscious action sent a bolt of lust to his groin. “That’s my lip gloss you’re tasting.”

  “So literal.” He bent forward and released a breath in her ear. “I can’t get over it. Your skin is like silk.” He slipped a hand under her shirt and skimmed the surface of her midriff until his fingertips touched the elastic ribbing on her bra. “I thought I took this away from you today? I want it off you.”

  “Ethan.” She took hold of his jaw and squeezed. “Kiss me? Please?”

  “Oh yeah.” He descended. Gentle at first until momentum built and he increased pressure as her mouth opened, giving him access to the hotness inside. God, her tongue connecting with his was like burning velvet. She was fire. Electric almost. And her hands? They raked through his hair, gathering and pulling him in tight.

  He liked her aggression, providing she knew when to give it up.

  When he shifted, she squirmed. He adjusted, she wiggled. He pulled, she pushed.

  Fuck, she tasted good. And her tight little body molded against him perfectly. All warm and eager. He enjoyed the moment until her arms impatiently locked around his shoulders and her legs restlessly shifted, attempting to spread. A clear indication she wanted more. But this wasn’t about what she wanted.

  “Colin?”

  “Y-yes?” She didn’t let go of his hair. She didn’t even open her eyes. She just licked her lips.

  “I’m going to give you something most women never get the chance to experience.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’m going to let you get angry at me for saying no.”

  It took a few seconds, but crinkles appeared on her brow. Her hips stopped flexing and her hands eased in his hair. “I don’t understand.”

  “You haven’t earned the privilege. Not yet.”

  Her eyes opened and he knew that his words had registered when he saw the devastation in her eyes. “You want me to leave? But I thought…”

  When she hesitated, he prompted, “You thought what? That if you came in here and threw yourself at me I’d bite and fuck your brains out?”

  God love her, she nodded.

  His leaned d
own, nose-to-nose with her. “No, honey, I’m sorry, but I’m not that easy.”

  “You’re serious. You really want me to leave?”

  He rubbed his nose against hers. “Don’t cry.”

  “Don’t— What do you expect me to do? Thank you?”

  He moved off her and eased back against the pillows. Fitting his hands behind his head he said, “Don’t be glib. I expect you to earn the privilege. Are you up for it, honey?”

  She flipped over onto her stomach and eyed him through her shimmering tears.

  He wasn’t going to be swayed by them. “Do you think you can convince me, baby girl?” When her eyes darkened, he added, “I want you to try.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  The instant Colin heard the endearment baby girl she was tingling. The way he said it, combined with his heated expression brought her right back to this morning and everything he’d done to her in front of that mirror.

  “I want to try too,” she whispered.

  He didn’t say anything to that. He didn’t move either. Clearly, she was on her own with this so she chose to do the one thing she was sure would clinch the deal. She shimmied toward the footboard of his huge bed, intent on heading south. She’d just gotten her hands on his belt when he spoke.

  “What are you doing?”

  She was actually biting her lip, trying to figure out how his fancy belt unbuckled, but stopped mid-tug and looked up. “I’m,” she eyed his fly pointedly, then shifted her gaze back to his and waggled her brows, “you know.”

  Before she had a chance to blink he’d hauled her up until she was lying across his chest. “Don’t insult me.”

  The gold flecks in his eyes gleamed and she gulped. “I wasn’t going to insult you. I was going to give you a blowjob.”

  His grip on her arms eased when he sighed. “I know in your vast vanilla experience, sucking a guy off reigns supreme, but in my world things are different.”

  “You don’t like to be—” Geez, there was no delicate way to finish this sentence. “Um, sucked off?”

  “I like it just fine, Colin, and you will too when you earn the right to do it.”