Regenerate

by Emily Goldthwaite

  As Rax and I sit in astronomy, I can hear Tish’s flirty gasps and giggles in the back, along with an occasional disciplinary red beep in their earpieces. She must have slipped her earpiece out unnoticed.

  Why do the troublemakers get away with breaking the rules? If I tried something like that, I’d get caught and penalized in two seconds for sure.

  I glance over at the safety officer standing outside our unit door, waiting to escort Rax to each and every unit he has. Case in point.

  I can’t believe how intense they’re being with this whole thing. Ever since we got back from Jo’s, Rax has had a security escort near him at all times. Are they even looking for another suspect?

  More giggling from the back and Lander’s low, intimate murmurs grab my attention yet again. I glance back to see Lander tracing a finger over the palm of Tish’s hand, showing her something. My stomach twists.

  Maybe I should steer the investigation in a different direction.

  While the thought of turning Lander in is satisfying, unless I have good reason to think it was him, I know that would be wrong.

  At lunch Raxtin sits so close to me our legs are touching. The contact makes me feel like smiling. Kachina and Jett are lost in a conversation of their own.

  “How’s your day so far, Ave?” Rax asks, bumping my shoulder with his.

  “It’s ok,” I say, unable to manage anything more upbeat.

  His smile turns into a frown and he starts poking at his food. “That sounds about as good as mine.” He nods towards the officer not far away. “I wonder when everyone will catch on that he’s only following me.”

  I gently touch his arm. “I’m sorry, Rax. I wish there was something I could do to help.”

  “Actually, there is.” He turns to me without scooting away, so that his face is very close to mine.

  “Really?” I say, trying to sound level.

  He nods. “Yeah, if you could have me over for dinner tonight, that would be fantastic.”

  That’s a new one. We haven’t done a dinner date since Granny Ann used to set them up. She had to stop though, shortly before she…

  “Sure. That would be nice.”

  His dimple appears on one cheek. “Thank you. You’re really saving me.”

  “Absolutely. But Why? Did your Grams not place the food order?” I hope he hasn’t been starving over there.

  He chuckles and turns back to his meal. “No, no. nothing like that.” His shoulders slump forward. “It’s just, if I hear Dad go off one more time about his embarrassment in ‘raising a criminal,’ I’m going to grab his vSpecs off his face and break them in half! As if he even did any of the raising,” he adds in a mutter.

  I can’t help my smile. “Whoa, Rax, are you all right? That’s not like you at all.” I’ve never heard him talk so passionately.

  He grunts and runs a hand through his dark hair, then balls his fist in his bangs. “I know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I guess it’s just all the stress. But I have this pent-up anger inside and I keep losing my cool.”

  A heated argument from the couple at the table just over from us pricks my ears, drawing my attention. An argument at school? What is going on?

  I look around the room and notice a lot more frowns than usual, and open displays of irritation. “I don’t think it’s just you, Rax.”

  “I don’t see security officers following anyone else around. Do you?” he snaps. His hand flies out in the direction of the uniformed man posted at the doors.

  I blink several times. Seriously, what’s gotten into him? “That’s not what I meant. I mean the losing your cool thing. Haven’t you noticed all the disciplinary red in our units lately?”

  Kachina’s voice suddenly cuts in. “Tell me about it. In fact, I heard that Terrance and Briar actually got in a fight this morning and were sent home. A real physical fight. Like with their fists. One of them even had to go to the medical office.”

  “No way,” says Jett. “Man, I would’ve paid to see that.” Kachina hits his arm, and Jett raises his hands. “What? I’ve never seen a legit fight before.”

  Rax keeps his head ducked but glances up at Jett. “I kinda punched a hole in my wall last night,” he murmurs.

  “Serious? Oh man!” Jett cheers, clapping his hands. “Dude, I gotta come see it after school.”

  Rax frowns. “You don’t need to come see it. It’s just a hole, punch your own.”

  “I screamed into my pillow last night for like ten minutes,” offers Kachina. “Like full-out screamed. It was so weird. I’ve never felt like doing that before. But Ashlyn said something rude about the dress I was wearing yesterday. It made me so mad I couldn’t stand it. I’ve been mad before, but not like that. I didn’t know what to do with it, so I just screamed.”

  Jett and Rax have vacant stares as they somewhat listen to her. She’s right, though. Something weird is definitely going on.

  My gaze slides over towards Lander’s table of fawning fangirls. Lander is smiling and managing to engage all of them at the same time. He seems as cool and composed as ever. I suppose he’s calm because he’s got nothing to be ticked about. He’s surrounded by gushing teenage girls; what more could a guy want?

  Honestly, though, that’s not really it. There’s something more. He seems to have a much better handle on his rise and fall of emotions. There’s an odd practiced-ness about it.

  Lander’s gaze crosses mine, but he doesn’t make eye contact with me. I get the feeling it was intentional. Yeah, he’s definitely practiced.

  My birth vid report in social studies is nothing to note. Especially since Lander is no longer in my unit, and my warmer was empty, and I can’t tell anyone why unless I want to get wiped out of existence . . . again. In the end, I just say the camera was broken so there was only audio. At least it’s not totally a lie.

  Dinner is actually fun. Raxtin is a lot more upbeat than he was at lunch, and Mom is happy to have him around. Thank goodness she doesn’t ask why I haven’t brought around the handsome guy that took me to the party. Though I still wouldn’t put it past her.

  When we’re done, Rax helps me clear away and dispose of the dishes then hits the self-clean button on the table and counters.

  “Well, I’ve got to turn in, kids,” says Mom with a yawn. “Make sure you turn the lights out when you go to bed, Averi.”

  “I will, Mom,” I say as Raxtin and I make our way to the front room.

  Mom passes through the room as well, but pauses at the hallway, typing a note on her projo-screen. “Oh, and if you two are going to stay up for long, make sure you note it in your report of activities so Rax is accounted for and our records match. Also, don’t forget to review the Appropriate Physical Contact and Proper Protection sections in your literature.”

  “Mom!” I yell, throwing a hand over my mouth. Can I just die of embarrassment right now?

  Rax snorts but covers with a cough.

  Through her screen, Mom tilts her chin a little higher in her chair. “I’m just saying don’t do anything that you wouldn’t want to file in your report. That’s all.”

  “We’ll remember, Mrs. Gouch,” says Rax. “Thanks for having me over for dinner. It was great.”

  She smiles and touches the nape of her neck. “Oh, well you’re welcome. It was nothing. I mean, I do have certain little tricks to warming it up that make it more savory, of course— ”

  My hand is over my eyes. Please stop flirting with every boy that comes to see me. “Good night, Mom.”

  Mom makes a piqued sound of dismissal. “Oh, fine. Good night. I’ve got yoga first thing, so make sure you don’t interrupt class. Just a few new subscribers and those vSpecs are as good as mine!” And with that, she hovers down the hall to her quarters and the door closes.

  Thank goodness!

  Rax turns to me and grins. “Sounds like your mom has high aspirations for our evening.”

  I blush and sink onto the couch. “Good grief, I think it would’ve been less awkward if she
’d just come straight out with it. ‘Kids, don’t have sex.’ Done.”

  Raxtin laughs and sits down next to me. “I think I heard something about protection in there too.”

  I blush. “Yep. And that.”

  We both chuckle and I can hardly look at him for a minute.

  Once we fall silent, he slaps a hand to his knee. “And on that note. What was your favorite part of today?”

  “Dinner,” I say happily. “How about you?”

  “I don’t know, that conversation with your mom just now is really fighting for first place.” His shoulders roll up and down with his laughter and I knock into his side with my elbow.

  “Oh, stop it already. You pill. Try again.”

  He stops his chuckling, but a small smile remains on his lips. “I’ll keep you posted on that.”

  A surge of electric warmth floods all my veins, and breathing just got a little more difficult, but in a good, exciting kind of way.

  His clear hazel eyes catch mine, and they seem especially bright and alive. His breaths seem heavier and more intense. I’m keenly aware of every point of contact between us; our shoulders, our arms, our knees.

  His deepest dimple is showing as he looks at me. Wow, he’s handsome. “You are truly beautiful, Averielle. Do you know that?”

  “Thank you.” I smile, but I don’t look away.

  Raxtin leans in and presses his lips to mine. His hand slides to the nape of my neck and his other encircles my shoulders.

  Kissing Raxtin is a more familiar feeling than I imagined. My heart is beating like a racehorse right now, but his kiss feels comfortable and nice. I like it.

  A Pocket Palm rings to life, and between the vibration and the sound I think we both jump halfway across the couch. We laugh and fidget, panting for breath.

  “Sorry,” he says, and slips it out of his pocket. He frowns as he reads the message.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask.

  He rereads the message as he answers me. “It’s from Jett. He says he needs to see me tonight. Says it’s important.”

  I can’t help letting out a loud sigh. “He has fantastic timing.”

  Rax sets his jaw askew, responding to the message. “Yes, he does.” He looks up at me with an apologetic arc to his brow and stows his device. “I guess I should get going anyway.”

  Disappointment sinks into my stomach. Does he have to leave so soon? “Oh, ok.”

  We rise to our feet and I walk him to the door. Somewhere out in the hall, I’m sure an officer is waiting to tail him.

  He pauses in the threshold. “Thanks for having me over.” Then he ducks in and gives me a quick peck on the lips, the warmth lingering. “Good night.”

  “Good night, Rax.”

  I’m not sure if I actually walk or float to my bed. Either way, I get there with a pleased smile I can’t wipe, and a light in my chest I can’t dampen. I like Rax. A lot.

  A sharp banging on my window tears me from my sleep and I nearly scream, especially because there’s a guy’s face outside of it. I fall out of bed and grapple on the floor for my device so I can call security. Then his face registers. Lander.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  I jump back up and stare hard to make sure that really is who I’m seeing.

  It is.

  I stand there for a minute, panting as my heart still races. I tug down my shirt to straighten it. Am I still in my regular clothes? Great. My brain feels foggy. I scratch my head, staring at him.

  He knocks again, softer this time, and mouths, “Can I come in?”

  I brush back my tangled hair and ball a fist in it, glancing at the time stamp on my wall. One a.m. What. The. Heck.

  I make my way to the window, stumbling like a drowsy drunk, and push it open.

  Lander swings in, graceful as ever. “Man, it’s cold out tonight.” He adjusts the weight of the shoulder pack he’s carrying and shivers.

  I shut the window and turn on him. “Do you have a problem with daytime hours?

  He grins that gorgeous grin of his and leans against the wall. “Yeah, then I don’t get to see your smoking hot bedhead look.”

  I blush, then my temper flares and I put my fists to my hips. “Don’t flirt with me, you jerk. You’ve been completely ignoring me for a week. You’re lucky I let you in that window.”

  He glances me over once with a smooth look in his gaze. “Oh, trust me, I know I’m lucky.”

  I wrap my arms around myself. “What do you want, Lander? It’s one in the morning, for crying out loud.”

  He glances at the time on my wall and frowns. “Man, it’s later than I thought. We have to get going.” He starts rummaging through my clothes on the ground.

  I rub the sides of my temples. “Get going? I’m not going anywhere with you. I don’t trust you.”

  “Really? Why?” He holds up an old long-sleeved shirt of mine, shakes his head, and tosses it back in its pile.

  “Because . . .Well, because you’ve been all flirty with Tish, and she’s a known floosy. So why would you bounce from someone like that to someone like me? And stop going through my stuff!”

  He looks up at me with a cocked brow, as if I’m being absurd. “If you think I’m here chasing skirt, that’s not what I am doing. Don’t you have anything warm?” He holds up two fistfuls of my laundry.

  I turn on my heel, march to my closet, and grab armfuls of my sweaters and coats. I ought to just throw him back out that stupid window and call it a night.

  From outside my closet I can hear him rummaging again. What is he doing?

  His voice sounds very much amused. “I was going to say get dressed, but other than layering up, it seems you’re already set. Don’t you ever sleep in pajamas?”

  I huff at him and come back out with my pile of winter clothes, dumping them unceremoniously on my bed. “Only when I bother to get them on. Now stop changing the subject and stop touching my things. Why are you here?”

  “Put on the darkest, warmest ones you have,” he says gesturing to the pile on my bed. “I need to show you something, but there isn’t much time. It has to do with . . . that person you were trying to get a hold of. We have to hurry, though.”

  Does he mean my dad? My pulse jumps to life and I’m already slipping on a sweater and my coat. “Is he here?”

  Lander fiddles with something and then places it in the drawer of my night stand. “No, but it could help you find him. Here.”

  Lander holds out my tracker blocker. “Put this on.”

  I take the band and look at him through narrowed eyes. “How do you know what this is?”

  “I know a lot of things. Are you coming or not?” He checks the clock again.

  “Yes, I’m coming. Let me disable the door alarm first.” I pull out my Pocket Palm, but Lander snatches it out of my hands.

  “No! Don’t. Don’t do anything. Just—” he sets it on the bed carefully then turns to me and holds a finger to his lips.

  “How are we going to get out?” I mouth.

  He points to the window.

  I shake my head vigorously, but he takes my hand and pulls me towards it.

  “It’ll be ok,” he whispers into my ear.

  The warmth of his breath on my neck fogs my thoughts once more and I have to shut my eyes for a second.

  When he opens the window, cold rushes into my room like a flood, instantly chilling my bones. I pull my hood up and zip the jacket all the way to my neck. The last time I did this, it was daylight and a heck of a lot warmer.

  We edge our way to the vertical pole along the slick collection tube. In a way, it’s actually less scary in the dark, where I can pretend the ground is much closer than it really is. My toes already feel numb by the time we reach the pole.

  He steps around to the other side and gestures towards the pipe. “Show me how it’s done, Miss Gouch.”

  I wrap my numb fingers around the tube. “What makes you think I’ve done this before to know?”

  The corner of his lips twitch upw
ard. “A hunch.”

  I wrap my legs around the pole and ease onto it, then slowly release the tension. This time I glide down much more smoothly than my last attempt. No burn on my hands or anything.

  So glad he saw me this time and not last.

  As soon as I’m halfway down, Lander follows suit. He looks like a pro. Has he done this before?

  No sooner are his feet on the ground than he is by my side. “Come on,” he says, wrapping his arm around the small of my back.

  We make our way through the most obscure side streets like before, but this time there are actually other people out. In fact, there are a lot of people, and if I’m not mistaken, they’re GAPs.

  “What on earth is going on tonight? Who are all these people?”

  Lander looks around and curses under his breath. “This is not good. I’ll explain on the way.”

  “Why are you upset? Won’t that give us more cover?”

  “Not if anyone notices the direction we’re headed. Stay close.” He takes his arm from my waist and grabs my hand.

  We weave in and out of shadows and small crowds for what seems like an hour, until finally we’re past the parts of the village with lights. Then it’s a straight shot through the dark to the hole beneath the wall.

  Going through the tunnel is a lot less freaky this time, and soon we’re about thirty yards beyond. My mind is racing and I can’t keep quiet any more.

  “Lander, did you poison the fishery?”

  His grip on my hand tightens and he glances back at me. “Yes.”

  Wow, just like that he admits it out right? “Why on earth would you do that? And why hang it on Raxtin?”

  Lander keeps moving but answers. “I needed an alibi. I knew Raxtin was with you, so that would leave enough doubt they couldn’t actually peg it on him. And also, he was the only other one who had, and was using, his re-router at the same time I needed him to. I lifted the router from Jett during third hour and put mine in its place. Then I took Rax’s with me to the fishery, hoping to stir up enough confusion that both of us could avoid conviction.”