My Mother in Law's Lover

by S M Mala

  ‘What if you fell in love again? How would the person accept you seeing Joan?’

  ‘They don’t,’ he quietly says. ‘And I wouldn’t see Joan if it turns serious.’

  ‘You said ‘don’t’ so that means there is someone else, isn’t there?’

  ‘Why are you asking?’ he says and all traces of friendliness wiped off his face.

  ‘I don’t know,’ I say realising he’s now defensive.

  He’s looking at me as if he’s trying to read my mind. I’m telepathically telling him to shag me senseless as well as wondering who the other woman is.

  ‘Stand up,’ Hal says grinning, snapping out of the mood. ‘Go on.’ He turns and gets the shower spray, checking the temperature.

  ‘You’re going to give me a douche?’ I ask as he comes closer.

  ‘Put your leg up here,’ he says and I do, then he holds the spray near my crotch. The small pressure of the spray immediate creates tingles and I let the sensation creep through my body. I feel his lips gently joining in. The jettison of water becomes stronger and I feel my orgasm starting.

  ‘Hal…I…’ I can’t talk as I hold onto his shoulders. As I let go, he … well, he’s using his mouth to add some stimulation. Wow, he’s being really horny.

  I nearly double up when I get a water induced orgasm.

  Opening my eyes, Hal stands up and pushes me back against the cold tiles, which is firing all sort of senses through my body. He’s hard and sweet, as I groan in pure pleasure, my fingers digging into his arse as he squeezes my breast so hard I think it’s going to pop.

  ‘Don’t go falling in love with me,’ he says staring deep into my eyes. ‘Promise me?’

  ‘You said you loved me a little bit all those months ago,’ I reply kissing him tenderly.

  ‘That was to get you to agree to see me,’ Hal says and I feel my stomach instantly sink. ‘I had to tell you something to convince you and that’s what you wanted to hear.’

  ‘Okay,’ I reply as he kisses me very gently gulping hard. ‘You lied.’

  He comes with a throaty groan and I watch him look at us joined before we slowly separate.

  ‘Maybe,’ he says turning around and putting on the shower. I look at his taut back and I’m confused by his comment. I don’t know what to think.

  ‘Do you think Joan’s okay. She hasn’t been herself recently,’ I say watching him. ‘Are you guys okay?’

  He turns to face me, looking down without his usual smile as the water splashes off his body into my face.

  ‘Why do you care?’ he asks seriously.

  ‘It’s just a question,’ I reply.

  ‘It’s not your concern.’ Hal turns around and goes back under the shower.

  I decide the next stage should be ‘let’s talk’ so I hop out of the bath, head for the bedroom where I quickly change and sit on the bed, trying to look as pretty adorable as I possibly can, which to me consists of lying on the bed like some sex kitten, or old mog depending on how you see it.

  Hal walks in looking gorgeous and flashes me a dirty look. I watch as he flings something on making him pretty damn hot to be honest.

  ‘Let’s talk,’ I begin.

  ‘Let’s not,’ he finishes.

  ‘Have I upset you?’ I ask feeling a bad vibe.

  ‘I’m not in the mood for conversation,’ he ends. ‘I think we’ve talked enough for the evening.’

  ‘We should talk more,’ I push.

  ‘We do.’

  ‘But you should open up.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘I want to know more about you.’

  ‘Or does Joan?’ he says a flash of anger passing over his face.

  Okay, I’ve been rumbled.

  ‘I don’t tell her anything,’ I shout as he walks out of the bedroom. ‘I’m interested in you.’

  ‘Don’t be,’ he barks back.

  What have I done to get the cold treatment now? He was fine half an hour ago.

  It’s nearly nine so it’s far too early for him to go to bed unless he’s wants hanky panky and, as he has just had some, he won’t be in the mood until eleven, if I’m lucky.

  ‘I’m not spying for Joan,’ I say walking into the garden as he’s chilling out with a glass of wine.

  ‘Do you want one?’ he replies holding up a glass of this red wine that tastes like I’m chewing the side of a tree.

  ‘No thanks,’ I sweetly reply and sit on a chair near him but not too close as I can see he’s in a strop.

  I take in the peace and quiet then admire the man in front of me who, to be perfectly honest, wouldn’t have given me the time of day if it wasn’t for Joan. I think I love him a lot more than a little.

  ‘Okay spit it out!’ he suddenly sits up startling me. ‘I’m not going to relax until you get it out in the open.’

  ‘Are you seeing someone else?’ I blurt out as a frown develops on his face.

  ‘And what has it got to do with you?’ he bluntly asks. I’ve clearly stepped over the line.

  ‘Are you pissed off with me?’

  ‘You just don’t listen, do you?’

  ‘Joan’s upset you’re seeing someone, other than me, who she’s not bothered about,’ I say cheerfully and am met with a glare.

  ‘I see.’ Hal sips his wine.

  ‘She says you’re being secretive? Are you being secretive?’

  ‘Do you think I am?’

  ‘I don’t know but you’ve got the arse with me all of a sudden,’ I say honestly.

  ‘You’re doing exactly what I asked you not to do?’

  ‘Which is what?’

  ‘Talking about me with Joan and hatching a plan.’

  ‘I haven’t got a plan!’

  ‘Obviously,’ he laughs. ‘Why do you think Joan wants you to find out? She’s more than capable of asking me herself.’

  ‘She seemed really concerned. I rarely see any emotion from her other than hate towards me,’ I gently say trying to touch his hand as he pulls it away. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you.’

  ‘And you think she doesn’t mind you seeing me?’

  ‘So she says.’

  ‘Sometimes Belle, I do wonder what goes on in your head?’ He says shaking his head from side to side.

  ‘Are you implying I’m thick?’

  ‘Joan certainly knows how to push your buttons.’

  ‘How?’

  Have I been set up here?

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ he says glaring at me for a moment then looking away.

  ‘So you’re not seeing someone else then?’ I quietly ask as he turns and looks at me.

  ‘I have to tell you something?’ he says seriously putting down his glass and leaning forward.

  ‘What?’ He’s going to tell me what he’s up to. Can I take it?

  ‘I don’t want you at my party.’

  ‘Why not? I’ll buy a new dress,’ I smile.

  ‘It’s for close family and friends.’

  ‘And what am I?’ I grin, hoping he’s going to say something nice then I see the look on his face and know it’s bad.

  He glances down then stares into my eyes before saying,

  ‘Just my fuck buddy, that’s all you are to me, nothing more Belle. It’s best you know the real score, okay?’

  ‘Okay,’ I gulp as my heart thuds to the ground.

  Twenty One

  I didn’t expect his comment to hurt me so badly.

  I wasn’t being childish when I left in the early hours of the morning. I couldn’t stay as I knew I was on the verge of tears every second. I kept going to the bathroom to have a little cry, pretending I had an over active bladder until he fell asleep so I could go.

  Before then I lay there with the words ‘fuck buddy, that’s all you are to me, nothing more,’ ringing through my head, the sudden realisation of where I really stand.

  And it hurt.

  He really hurt me that night.

  It seemed a funny term earlier on in the evening and then later it felt li
ke a stab to the heart.

  For a moment I thought I meant something to him. I am suck a pillock when it comes to men, I really am.

  ‘How many are you intending to make?’ asks Meena filling up my glass of wine while I mix together sugar and butter taking my frustration out on my food the following Wednesday. ‘You’re going to break the bowl.’

  ‘He never cared about me,’ I say beating like a mad woman and gulping back the pain.

  ‘So you keep saying,’ she replies flashing me a bored expression. ‘Can I have this brownie?’

  ‘Yes.’ I reply. ‘I have to get this done by the afternoon. I don’t know why I volunteer for these school fetes?’

  ‘They need someone who can make cakes and here you are? The fuck buddy with no party to go to,’ she laughs while stuffing her face with my food.

  ‘You think this is funny don’t you?’ I say glancing at her while checking on the melted chocolate. ‘He hurt me.’

  ‘What I find really funny is that you’re sleeping with your mother in law’s lover and then you wonder why he calls you a fuck buddy. C’mon he doesn’t want to be seen out with you.’

  ‘We go out!’

  ‘Where? To secretive little bars and places you won’t be spotted?’

  ‘He puts his arm around me when we walk down the road and holds my hand.’

  ‘Only to make out he’s drunk and in need of support,’ she says and I laugh knowing she’s trying to lift my dark mood.

  ‘You win,’ I sigh, stirring the mixture. ‘In the end of the day you can’t trust any man.’

  ‘He’s really put your nose out of joint, hasn’t he?’ Meena says bemused. ‘You knew what you were getting into.’

  ‘I really like him. I thought he cared more about me than a sex thing.’

  ‘Calling yourself a sex thing now? Blimey! Did you think it was a love thing?’

  I blink guiltily at Meena before I finish the mixture, put it in the baking tray before banging it in the oven then I sit opposite my friend.

  ‘You think I’m stupid don’t you?’ I say, knowing the look I’m currently receiving.

  ‘I’m not one to judge,’ she says wiping her mouth with a napkin.

  ‘But?’ I know what she’s going to say.

  ‘It’s not healthy sleeping with Joan’s bloke. What’s she getting out of it? You know she hates you, you know sharing her son was hard enough but this bloke? There’s more to it.’

  ‘Not so long ago you thought I was the lucky one,’ I say looking at my traitor friend. ‘You were all up for a bit of something to spice up your life.’

  ‘Time of the month,’ she dismisses. ‘And you shouldn’t have asked him questions based on her paranoia.’

  ‘I had to ask him if there was someone else,’ I sigh. ‘I like him Meena. He makes me happy.’

  ‘And that’s another thing. You like him but where’s it going to get you? He’s already told you he’s only seeing you for sex. Think about it Belle, it’s not a good set up. Someone is going to get hurt and it’s not going to be either of them.’

  ‘I won’t get hurt!’ I say, knowing I already am. I walk to door and look towards the back garden as the kids play outside.

  Then Beth comes bounding into the kitchen.

  ‘Shoes!’ I shout and watch her grimace as she kicks them off and sits on a chair, reaching out for my half eaten brownie. ‘That’s mine. You’ve had one already.’

  ‘I’m hungry,’ she sighs as Meena pats her head and gives her a hug.

  ‘Mummy, Luke has a cat,’ she says, legs dangling off the seat.

  ‘Yes I know.’

  ‘Will I get a cat?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘I never get what I want!’

  ‘We have something in common,’ I say under my breath as Meena laughs

  ‘Joanie says she’ll get me one,’ continues my daughter. ‘My lovely nana!’

  ‘I don’t care what she says, you’re not getting one. Would you like some juice?’

  ‘No,’ she shrugs and takes the brownie off my plate and walks back into the garden.

  ‘She’s just like Joan, don’t you think?’ I say.

  ‘Is Joan going to the party? Silly question really?’ Meena smiles at me.

  ‘She’s organising it,’ I say remembering Hal slipped that piece of information after making me feel like shit. 'That’s about as much as I know. I don’t know when I’m going to see him again.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘The party is on a Thursday and that’s’ when we meet up.’

  ‘He lives in London, doesn’t he?’ Meena says, with a massive frown on her forehead.

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘There are 7 days in a week?’

  ‘And your point?’

  ‘Can’t he see you any other time?’

  ‘I know but I daren’t ask him now as he’s pissed off with me,’ I groan knowing she’s right.

  ‘I think you should stop it,’ Meena snaps shaking her head furiously. ‘I know you’ve had a few disasters over the past year but this is unhealthy.’

  ‘I like him,’ I honestly say. ‘I really do.’

  ‘How much?’ her eyes narrow.

  ‘More than I tell him.’

  ‘Do you love him?’ she hisses. ‘Look how he treats Joan?’

  ‘Justly.’

  ‘No badly. What sort of man tells a woman who is obviously besotted with him for over 20 years that he likes to sleep with other women? Did it ever occur to you how she felt when he suggested you?’

  ‘I suppose she was physically sick but I think she’s bulimic anyway,’ I laugh.

  ‘She’s letting him call the shots to make him happy. That’s not healthy.’

  ‘Nowadays, what is?’

  I’ve not heard a peek from Hal since I saw him last. It’s a relief to pick up my child from school just to stop moping around.

  ‘Hi Beth,’ I say carrying her bag and trying to hold her hand though it keeps slipping out of my grasp.

  ‘Mummy,’ she says.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘What time are we going to nana?’ she asks looking up at me.

  ‘Today you’re staying with me,’ I brightly say hoping she’ll be thrilled.

  ‘Pardon?’ she says stopping abruptly.

  ‘Nana isn’t around so you’re not-.’

  ‘That’s not fair,’ she says on the verge of tears. ‘I want to see nana!’

  ‘You can see her at the weekend,’ I calmly say trying to move her down the pavement.

  ‘But I want to see her today!’ she says and starts to cry. I look around and hope none of the other mother’s witnessing the scene can tell I have no control over my child.

  ‘Listen Beth,’ I say going down to do the eye level thing. ‘You can speak to nana today and we will see her on Saturday. Tonight shall I get a takeaway pizza and ice cream?’

  ‘Can I have a cat?’

  ‘Give it a rest!’

  We’re sitting on the sofa eating pizza and watching a DVD. She’s still not happy about being stuck with me but tough.

  ‘I don’t really like pizza,’ she says looking up at me.

  ‘You ate one and a half slices.’

  ‘But I don’t really like it.’

  ‘You wanted it,’ I say sighing loudly.

  ‘I’d prefer Nandos,’ she sniffs and just as I’m about to grab left over pizza there’s a knock on the door. ‘Who’s that?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ I reply trying to reach for her plate.

  ‘Aren’t you going to find out?’

  ‘Belle!’ Joan shouts through the letter box and we look at each other.

  ‘See your nana must have known you were missing her,’ I say as Beth grins with glee.

  I open the door and Joan rushes in.

  ‘I need to use your loo before I go the party!’ she says and runs upstairs.

  I turn to see Beth standing at the door.

  ‘What party?’ asks Beth looking at me as if I have taken all
her toys and dosed them with petrol with the intent of burning them.

  ‘Hal’s having a party and-.’

  ‘Why didn’t he invite me?’ she asks earnestly and I can see she is hurt by this exclusion, pretty much like her mother.

  ‘It’s for adults and no kids. I’m sure we’ll all go out together to celebrate his birthday separately.’

  ‘Why aren’t you invited?’

  ‘Because I’m busy making cakes,’ I say cheerfully. ‘Now run-.’

  ‘Do you like Uncle Hal?’ she asks with narrowed eyes.

  ‘He’s not your Uncle,’ I say seeing the way my daughter in scrutinising me with her eyes.

  ‘He’s very handsome,’ she persists.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Does he like you?’ she says and I think she might know something. ‘You see him don’t you? Nana says you scrub for him on Thursdays.’

  ‘Pardon?’ I don’t know where this is coming from. ‘What does nana exactly say?’

  ‘She says you are a scrubber for him once a week,’ she innocently says and my mouth is open, knowing full well what Nana is implying.

  ‘Yes, I help him clean his kitchen,’ I calmly reply and gulp so hard I really am going to choke.

  ‘You don’t like cleaning the kitchen,’ she smartly replies.

  ‘To make someone happy I’m willing to scrub for them.’

  ‘Can I be a scrubber for Uncle Hal?’

  ‘Over my dead body,’ I smile. ‘You’re a little too young but he has a weird taste for pensioners.’

  I give her a chocolate brownie to shut her up.

  Joan returns downstairs and walks into the kitchen looking … well how can I put it? Stunning!

  ‘Beth, Beth!’ she shouts and I see her physically recoil in horror on seeing her granddaughter covered in chocolate.

  ‘Beth don’t go near nana. She can’t have chocolate marks on her dress.’

  ‘Nana!’ Beth says rushing towards her and I have to quickly interject to stop a very nasty scene. I can see the glee on Beth’s face and know she’s doing this to wind up Joan.

  Joan is wearing some sparkly white number that’s gorgeous. She looks amazing. Glowing!

  ‘I like your dress,’ I honestly say as Beth struggles in my grasp.

  ‘It’d fit your thigh, wouldn’t it?’ Joan quips.