Hard Rock Hot Heart

by Laura Anne Turner

  That stung, and I felt cold all over. I didn’t have a reply to that, because I couldn’t really defend myself. Caro’s comment was full on target. She had hit my own weakness. It was something I was no longer proud of doing.

  While I was speechless for the moment and Ina was sobbing, Nellie spoke up without taking her arm from around Ina. “Caro, I thought you loved playing for ‘The Coldhearts’, and remember we have a gig a week from now.” She sounded as if she was hoping the redheaded bitch would start acting reasonably and responsibly.

  “You’d better shut up, Nell, you’re no better than those two,” Caro exclaimed. “I know you’ve been sleeping around, too, you little whore. You were seeing several girls at the same time. I know you were in Bette’s bed more than once, even when you weren’t together anymore. And I saw it with my own eyes how you devoured that black-haired girl we met on New Year’s Eve. You undressed and fucked her with your oh so innocent looking eyes. You don’t have to tell me anything, you little witch.”

  Nellie went pale; totally shocked about the rude way Caro was treating her. Caro glared at her, before she turned back to Ina and me, an ugly grin on her face. “And both of you were hot for that black-haired bass player. The one you all wanted to fuck. I saw it. And Bette even kissed her, even though that girl didn’t want to.”

  “I didn’t know you could be such a fuckin’ bitch,” I growled, my anger getting the better of me. I took a step forward, clenching my fists. I wanted to beat the very shit out of Caro. Before I could do that however, Nellie darted from her chair and grabbed my arm.

  “Please Bette, don’t,” Nellie said softly, “she’s not worth it.” Nellie’s dark eyes were blazing and she shot a murderous look at Caro. For a brief moment I had the illusion of Alice Cullen, vampire, standing next to me. If looks could kill Caro would be dead by now.

  I took a deep breath. It took all my strength not to slap her. “You’re such a fuckin’ cunt, Caro,” I growled. “Listen, because I’m not going to say it twice. After tonight’s performance we’ve all had more than enough of you, so this is what’s going to happen. You’re going to leave this room now, before I really forget myself and slap your filthy mouth. Just leave, pack your things and go.”

  Caro just shrugged, pretending to be unimpressed. She looked as if she had been prepared to take up a fight with me. Caro was tall, her body well trained, she’d at least given me a black eye. “If that’s what you want, Bitch Goddess. I’ll be gone anyway soon,” Caro retorted.

  I pointed to the door. “Just go, bitch! And when you do, leave your keys on the kitchen table, because you’re never setting foot into this house again. Understood?”

  Without a word Caro walked out, slamming the door behind her. A few moments later we heard her slamming her bedroom door, too. Letting out a long sigh, I turned toward my two remaining Coldhearts. Ina was leaning forward with her elbows on the table, sobbing heartbrokenly, covering her face with her hands. Nellie was staring at me, looking appalled. I shrugged wearily and sat down next to Ina, slinging my arm around her and pulling her toward me.

  “I’m so sorry, Sweetheart,” I said softly.

  Ina took her hands off her face, revealing that her eyes were red and swollen from crying. “Oh God, Bette,” she whispered, “we were together for more than six years, and now she’s gone?” She shook her head desperately. “I can’t understand it. I just can’t understand her. How can she be so cruel?”

  “I know, Princess, I know,” I replied, soothingly, taking her hand and squeezing it. Without saying a word, Nellie had gotten up and gone to the cupboard. She came back with a bottle of Jack Daniels and three shot glasses, which she set down on the table. I smiled at Nellie gratefully. Smiling back at me, she poured Ina a stiff drink and handed it to her, before she poured drinks for herself and me. “Thanks, Baby Doll,” I said.

  “C’mon, Sweetheart, drink up, you need it,” Nellie told Ina coaxingly. Ina hesitated a moment, and then gulped it down. Nellie and I followed her example. When our glasses were empty, Nellie gave us a refill.

  “I guess I never really knew how Caro felt, no matter how often we talked. She knew how I am, and we talked about it a thousand times.” Ina wiped her eyes on her sleeve. “I had no idea she was so full of rage, so full of hatred. For me, for you, even for Nell.” Ina sighed, before she went on. “How could she hate you, Bette, when our threesomes were always my idea?”

  Ina gulped down her second glass of JD. “She never said a word. I really thought she enjoyed our threesomes, and now it turns out she actually hates you, Bette.” Fresh tears began to stream down her cheeks. “And now she fucks up our band, too. You created ‘The Coldhearts’, Bette. You led us, you kept us together, and you made us what we are now.” She looked at me in despair. “Are we over?”

  “No, we’re not. We’ll find a replacement for Caro,” I told her firmly, “preferably before our gig next weekend.” I smiled at her wryly, “You know ‘The Coldhearts’ never cancel a gig. Never. If necessary we’ll play as a three-piece band.”

  Nellie was listening and watching, and stopped sipping her drink to say, “Maybe we won’t have to cancel anyway.”

  I looked up at her sharply. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Baby Doll?”

  She nodded. “I’m pretty sure we are. Tomorrow morning I’m going to call Jenny and ask her to come over for an audition.”

  I wondered how Nellie might have got Jenny’s phone number, but then I was pretty sure our beautiful drummer had a crush on the girl with the jet-black hair.

  “But she’s already in a band with her girlfriend,” Ina objected. “What makes you so sure she’ll leave them to join us?”

  “I’m not sure about that, but I have a feeling she’d at least help us out. And it won’t be any harm to ask, will it?” Nellie replied, smiling at Ina tenderly.

  Ina’s lips quirked up in a slight smile. “I guess not.” Then she sighed. “She’d be perfect, though. She’s so gorgeous, and she’s a really good bass player, too. That chick rocks.”

  “She would be a perfect replacement for Caro, Baby Doll,” I remarked, smiling at Nellie. “I hope you can convince her.”

  I saw mischief in our young drummer’s dark eyes. “Oh, I’ll do my best, Bette.” She held her glass out to Ina and I so that we could clink our glasses.

  We downed another glass of JD, and it was well past midnight, before we went upstairs. We were all thoroughly drunk, Ina more than the rest of us. I had my arm around our beautiful lead guitarist, supporting her, and Nellie followed right behind us. When we came to the door of her bedroom, Ina looked at me, pleadingly, and I knew she didn’t want to be alone tonight.

  “Don’t worry, Sweetheart,” I told her softly, “you won’t have to sleep alone tonight.” I glanced back at Nellie once we were past the doorway, and she entered the room with us on the other side of Ina and me, taking her hand. The three of us fell onto Ina’s bed, taking her into a sandwich position between Nellie and I. Ina snuggled up into Nellie, while I spooned my beautiful friend and lover. I felt so drained emotionally by what had happened earlier this evening that I fell asleep almost immediately.

  Sometime later in the night, the sound of Ina sobbing woke me up. I whispered to her softly, while stroking her back and kissing the nape of her neck. I could feel her body relax and the sobbing faded away. I suspected she’d finally fallen asleep.

  I couldn’t get back to sleep for a long time, though. I thought about Ina and Caro. I knew that Ina genuinely loved Caro, even though she couldn’t be faithful to her. I wished Caro had understood that. I began thinking about what I’d want from a girl if I ever wanted a relationship with one again. It had to be someone who understood me better than Caro understood Ina.

  +++

  When I woke up late the next morning, I opened my eyes and shut them again immediately, as the bright daylight coming in through the window of Ina’s bedroom made my head pound. Realizing that I was wrapped around Ina, I opened my eyes again
just a little and tentatively raised my head to see if she was still asleep. Her regular breathing told me she was, and so I cautiously lifted my head a little more to check if Nellie was still there, but her place on Ina’s other side was deserted.

  Closing my eyes again I thought back to what had happened last night: The ugly drama; Ina’s shock and misery; Caro quitting the band; Ina and I drinking way too much Jack Daniels. I sighed and took another moment to assess how hung-over I was, and decided that I’d had worse. Even though the headache was awful, I didn’t feel like throwing up, which was definitely a plus. It made it easier to face the day.

  Biting my lip to keep from groaning out loud, I managed to disentangle myself from Ina without waking her up, and slid out of bed. I dragged myself to the bathroom, washed a couple of aspirin down with some water, and took a long shower. Feeling better afterwards, I padded to my own bedroom, where I put on yoga pants and a sweater, and then made my way downstairs to the kitchen.

  When I got closer, I heard singing and caught the delicious scent of coffee. Curious I stopped at the kitchen entrance and saw Nellie filling her mug from the coffee maker. She was singing along to ‘I Was Made for Loving You’, an old song by ‘Kiss’, that was just playing on the radio. ‘Tonight! I want to see it in your eyes. Feel the magic. There’s something that drives me wild.’

  Nellie seemed enormously happy about something, and it became even more obvious that she was happy the moment she picked up her mug and turned to see me standing in the doorway. “Hey, Bette,” she exclaimed, her beautiful face lighting up. “Good morning!” She grinned at me as if she was absolutely thrilled to see me.

  “Good Morning?” I replied, taken aback. I blinked at her happy face. What was she so fucking happy about after what happened last night? And how could she have so fucking much energy? How many cups of coffee had she had already?

  “Oh, it’s a wonderful morning, Bette,” Nellie went on, smiling radiantly. “I have the most incredible news.” She sat her mug down on the kitchen table and turned back to the cupboard. “Sit down and I’ll pour you a cup of coffee and tell you all about it.”

  I did as she’d told me, my eyes never leaving our pretty, young drummer, as she filled another mug with steaming coffee and put it down in front of me. “So, what’s the big news, Baby Doll?”

  Nellie sat down across from me, and after taking a gulp of her own coffee she beamed at me and said excitedly, “I talked to Jenny this morning and let her know we need a new bass player.”

  Again I briefly wondered how she might have got Jenny’s phone number, but then Nell was our nerd and pretty good at such things. “Huh,” I said in surprise, “are you saying she was interested, Nell?”

  She grinned eagerly. “Very interested. At least interested enough to agree to come over this afternoon to audition for us.” She paused to take a sip of coffee and added, “She doesn’t have a car. So I’m going to go over to her place about one to pick her up.”

  “You must’ve been really persuasive, Baby Doll,” I told her, shaking my head in wonder. Nellie smiled like she’d just hit the lottery jackpot. I slowly smiled myself, now realizing why Nellie was so happy. She was crazy about the girl with the jet-black hair, and now maybe she had a chance to get somewhere with her. Okay, there still was Jenny’s beautiful redheaded girlfriend, but I didn’t want to think about that now. Still, it wasn’t just good news for Nellie, it was good news for ‘The Coldhearts’.

  Taking another sip of coffee I thought for a moment. “But what about the band she’s in now?”

  “That’s the thing, Bette. Last night they broke up,” Nellie replied, wide-eyed. “Their drummer was a complete dickhead to Jenny and they had a huge fight. So in the end Jenny and Emilia quit.”

  “Wow.” I shook my head, taking that in. “Sounds like there were a lot of break-ups last night.”

  Nellie’s pretty face darkened with concern showing in her beautiful dark eyes. “How’s Ina doing this morning?”

  “I don’t know, Nell. She was still asleep when I left.” Taking another sip of coffee I added, “I’ll let her sleep a while longer, before I’ll go check on her.”

  Nellie nodded. “Well, at least she won’t have to deal with Caro any more. When I got up this morning her car was gone.”

  “Good. I don’t think I could deal with any more fucking drama on top of a hangover.”

  Nellie wrinkled her pretty nose. “How bad is your hangover, Bette?”

  “I’ve had worse, Baby Doll.” I smiled wryly. “My headache is starting to fade since I put a mouthful of aspirin into me, and I don’t feel nauseous at all.”

  “Wonderful,” she said, beaming at me. “I went and got fresh rolls. I was just about to have breakfast. Can I get you some, too?”

  I couldn’t help smiling back at her. “Okay, Sunshine. You make the idea sound good.”

  We had a breakfast of butter, marmalade and rolls, along with ham, cheese, and boiled eggs. Of course we had more coffee, too.

  Later, just after Nellie left to pick up Jenny, I heard the shower in the bathroom upstairs go on, and I realized that Ina must finally be up. After setting up breakfast for her at the living room table, I turned on the sound system and put on some Pink Floyd to let her know where I was.

  Before long, Ina wandered in, wearing faded jeans and a blue hoodie, her long, blonde hair still wet from the shower. I got up from the couch and walked over to her, hugging her tight. I then stood back, put my hands on her shoulders, and took a closer look at her. She looked deathly pale and her eyes were swollen and red. She was quite obviously still suffering from the effects of the shock she’d gotten last night. Gesturing toward the table I told her that I’d made breakfast for her, but she just shook her head.

  So I took her hand, led her to the couch, sat her down, and handed her one of the mugs of coffee, which she accepted gratefully. Suddenly I had an idea how I might cheer her up. I excused myself, went to my bedroom, and got my acoustic guitar. I sat down on the couch next to Ina, who was clutching her coffee mug as if her life depended on it. I smiled at her tenderly, turned off the sound system, and after tuning my guitar I began to play Pink Floyd’s ‘Shine on You Crazy Diamond’ in my own acoustic version. It was a song that had always been a favorite of hers. She looked up at me quizzically, and I started singing the lyrics to her softly.

  ‘Remember when you were young you shone like the sun. Shine on you crazy diamond. Now there’s a look in your eyes like black holes in the sky. Shine on you crazy diamond.’

  I made the song an expression of my compassion and love for her. By the time I finished the song Ina managed to smile for me a little. I continued to play and sing for her, until we heard the sound of Nellie’s car pull up outside. I put my guitar aside and slung my arm around my beautiful blonde friend. And beautiful she was, even though miserable und hung-over. “That should be Nellie, Princess,” I told her softly. “She went to get Jenny so she can try out as our new bass player.”

  Ina’s jaw dropped. “Jenny’s willing to join us? How did Nellie do that? And what about her own band?”

  “It seems it broke up last night, Princess, and it seems that our Nellie was very persuasive.”

  “Whoa, lucky us,” Ina replied wide-eyed.

  Just then Nellie walked into the living room with Jenny just behind her. “Hey, you two! Here’s Jenny,” she called out, grinning back at the girl with the jet-black hair.

  Jenny smiled shyly as she entered the room in Nellie’s wake. Somehow, she was even more gorgeous than I remembered her being. She was wearing tight black jeans that nicely hugged her abundant curves, and a dark green sweater that brought out the color of her amazing green eyes. Her most prominent feature was her long, jet-black hair that reached almost down to her waist.

  Before I knew it I jumped up from the sofa and ran to Jenny, squealing her name. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheeks three times. I felt how she tensed immediately, and so I released her and put both my hands on
her shoulders, looking straight into her eyes. She looked startled by my enthusiasm, and so I said, “Welcome to ‘The Coldhearts’, Jenny. I’m so glad you could make it today. It’s a real pleasure having you here.”

  Jenny blushed adorably. “It’s, uh, my pleasure, Bette,” she stammered. “I’m really flattered you were thinking of me!”

  Ina came up to us, and I let go of Jenny so that she could hug the gorgeous black-haired girl, too. “How could we have thought of anyone else, Jenny?” Ina said, smiling and sounding poised and gracious. “You’re so perfect for us.”

  Nellie spoke up then. “Hey, you two, you know Jenny doesn’t have unlimited time today. I think we’d better get her audition started.”

  “Yeah, Baby Doll, you’re right. We’d better start rocking! Take Jenny to the barn, and we’ll join you in a minute,” I replied.

  I watched how Nellie smiled, took Jenny’s hand, and led her out. I exchanged looks with Ina, and she smirked. It was as obvious to her as it was to me that our pretty drummer liked Jenny a lot.

  “What do you think, Princess?” I said to Ina. “You think our Crazy Bitches will like Jenny?”

  “They’ll go crazy over her, Bitch Goddess. Especially after I pick out some hot clothes for her.”

  “Fuck yeah, they will,” I said to my friend and lover. “Let’s get our shoes on and go see if she can rock as hard as we can.”

  We picked up our guitars from our rooms upstairs, and then left the farmhouse to cross the short distance to the old barn turned into our rehearsal and recording studio. Nellie had already switched on our equipment and was sitting behind her drum kit, and Jenny was set up and ready with her bass guitar.