Renewed (Shattered #3)

by Heather D'Agostino

  "What's wrong?" I murmured against her lips.

  “I’m not going to have sex with you tonight, Nick," she muttered as she pulled back.

  "Who said anything about having sex?" I shook my head trying to fight off the images I'd formed of her naked and underneath me as I made her cry out my name.

  "I know how you operate," she waved her hand in the air. "I know you want to…" she trailed off.

  “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to sleep with you,” I heaved out a breath “but I want it to mean something.” I paused as I tried to put my feelings into words, “I like you…a lot. I want this to work, but you have to trust me. I just want to show you that we can be close without actually doing it, that’s all.” I glanced away as I tried to calm the raging boner I had.

  “Like what?” Leah’s voice came out as a whisper.

  I turned hopeful eyes on her and beckoned her to come closer. I cupped her jaw, and leaned in right next to her ear as I whispered, “I just want to touch you.” She started to pull back, but I kept her in place with my grip. “I wanna make you come and call out my name. I wanna be your first.” I pulled back to look her straight in the eyes. "Let me show what you're missing…please?"

  Leah nodded slowly as she clamped down on her lower lip and slid closer. Her entire body trembled as I leaned in and began kissing her again. I could tell she was nervous. I knew she was one of the good girls, my brother had made sure to drill that fact into my head when I started pursuing her. She was so beautiful and smart though. I couldn’t stay away. I’ve been drawn to her since the day we met.

  When I felt her begin to relax, I let my hand resume its descent toward the bottom of her skirt once again. This time, when I brushed my fingers across her thighs, I wasn’t met with resistance, but acceptance. She shifted slightly beside me, and let them fall open. It was like she already knew the bliss I was offering, and now she couldn't get it fast enough. When I let my fingers brush across her panties, she whimpered against my mouth. She was soaked, and it was all for me. My caveman instincts kicked in, and I growled into her mouth.

  "You're fucking wet as hell," I mumbled as I began to play with the small swatch of cotton that covered that promised land.

  “Nick,” she panted. “Please don’t stop,” she begged as she squirmed in her seat.

  My baby had finally realized what I'd been talking about, and now she couldn't get enough of me.

  “Oh, I’m gonna make you feel real good,” I groaned as I tugged at the cotton and ran my index finger lightly across her. She whimpered again as her hips inched forward trying to make a firmer contact. I deepened the kiss we were currently locked in as I slowly and painstakingly dipped my finger into her. She broke the kiss as she tossed her head back and moaned. "Oh god," she panted. "More!" she begged as she slid closer to me. My girl had gotten a taste and now she couldn't get enough.

  I took my free hand, wrapped it around her waist, and gave a quick tug to pull her into my lap. She came willingly, and tossed her right leg over me so she was straddling me. I almost lost it when I felt her press her center right over my dick. He was straining against my jeans, and didn’t understand why he wasn’t getting any action. When Leah moved from my mouth to my ear, I couldn’t help but groan. She tugged the lobe into her sweet mouth and nibbled lightly as the hand that was holding her up began to trail down my chest.

  "Leah?" I gasped as she made her way south. "What are you doing?"

  "I wanna touch you too," she whispered into my ear as her body began to tighten around my fingers. "I wanna make you feel good too."

  "I don't know if that's such a good idea," I mumbled. When she reached my belt buckle, I froze. She released a frustrated groan as she rocked her hips against my hand.

  "Please Nick," she began releasing the buckle, and my resolve crumbled. I quickly began moving my fingers again. I knew I needed to finish her before she freed me, or we'd be doing a lot more than just touching tonight. As much as I wanted to do more, I knew she wasn't ready.

  When I felt her slump against me, I chuckled. "You ok?" I pressed a kiss to her cheek.

  “Hmmm?” she lifted her head and looked at me with a goofy grin.

  Before I could respond she pressed a kiss to my mouth and mumbled, "My turn," as she flicked the button of my jeans open, and quickly reached inside.

  I don’t really remember much after that except she was worried that she’d do it wrong. I assured her that she couldn’t do anything wrong, and having her hand on my dick was amazing. After she’d finished me off, we had spent the rest of the evening cuddled together in the cab of my truck contemplating how good it would be between us when we finally did go all the way. I knew we'd be great together. Leah had this fire in her that burned out of control when we were in the same room. It would mesmerize me, and make me a mere pawn in her game.

  “What are you thinking about?" Leah's soft voice broke me out of my daydream.

  I snickered, "I don't think you want to know."

  "Now I really want to know," she smacked at my chest as she slid closer. "Please?"

  "You know I love when you beg me right? I mean no matter what it's for…all you have to do is say please and stick out that lip," I glanced down at her "like you're doing right now, and I'll give into you."

  “Yep,” she nodded. “It’s my secret weapon. Now spill. What’s put that grin on your face, besides me just jacking you off," she rolled her eyes.

  "I was thinking about the first time we did this," I kissed the top of her head. "Happy now?"

  Leah’s face began to heat as she buried it in my chest. “Oh god,” she groaned. “I was so bad at this back then."

  "Not bad," I tried to get her to look at me "just inexperienced. I'm glad I was the one to teach you," I snickered. "I think I'm a pretty good teacher."

  “Especially with the hands-on stuff,” she giggled as she tilted her head up to kiss my neck.

  “Definitely with the hands-on stuff," I wrapped my arms tighter around her. "So," I went to change the subject to something that had been bothering me all day "what's up with Avery?"

  Leah stiffened slightly before looking up at me, "What do you mean?"

  “I mean my brother likes her. He really likes her,” I sighed. “Has she said anything to you about how she feels about him?"

  “Nick…Avery’s been through a lot with Logan and her dad. What her mom went through…it really messed her up. I don’t know if she knows what she wants. Cam has a son. I don’t think Avery’s ready to be a mom yet,” she sighed as she began trailing her fingers in a circle on my chest. "She likes him, but I think it scares her."

  "Yeah…I get that," I rolled to my back and pulled Leah with me. "I just wish they would figure out what they want. I'm tired of being in the middle of it."

  “Me too, but give her time. I have a feeling that they're both going to end up in the guest room by the end of the week. I know Avery, and I'm sure it's killing her to know he's sleeping down the hall on the couch," she yawned as she settled against me.

  "Get some rest," I kissed her forehead. "We'll talk more about this later."

  "Mmm'kay," she yawned again as she closed her eyes. "My appointment was moved to Thursday this week, if you still want to come with me," she mumbled before drifting off to sleep.

  “Of course I want to come,” I murmured as I felt her go lax with sleep against my side. Two more days…two more days and I'd know if I was having a son or daughter. Thursday couldn't come fast enough.

  Chapter 7

  Leah

  I awoke from my nap to giggling in the room next door. Nick's spot next to me was empty, and Avery's shrill voice could be heard through the wall.

  "Stop!" she squealed followed by another high-pitched laugh.

  "That's not what you were saying a minute ago," came a deeper voice. The longer I listened the more the pieces began to click together. She was in there with Cam. I wasn't sure what it meant, but I hoped that it meant they were working their shit out.
I was just as tired as Nick was at watching them dance around one another.

  Knowing that it was almost dinner time, I figured I better get up. I'd been sleeping most of the day, and I knew that if I slept anymore I'd never be able to fall asleep tonight. When I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, the baby must have shifted. I had a sudden urge to pee and in my current state I wasn't sure I could make it without wetting myself. Over the last month, it was as if this baby had decided to consume Miracle Grow. I'd gained ten pounds, and was slowly losing the ability to see my feet. I pressed my hands on the mattress beside my hips, and heaved myself to my feet just as Nick appeared in the doorway.

  "What are you doing?" he rushed over to me to help me stand.

  “I’m not broken Nick. I can stand on my own!” I jerked my arm out of his grasp. “Stop treating me like I’m sick! I’m not sick, just pregnant!” I scowled as I rushed towards the bathroom door slamming it shut, and effectively shutting him out.

  I could hear his muffled voice through the door as he attempted to open it even though I’d locked it. “Please don’t be like this Leah. I’m only trying to help,” he murmured as he jiggled the knob.

  “Just let me go to the bathroom in peace, please?” I sighed as I placed my elbows on my knees and let my head drop into my hands.

  “We’re gonna talk about this. I’m not letting you push me away,” he muttered as his voice trailed off. I assumed he'd given up on me letting him in, and had left the room.

  When I emerged from the bathroom, Nick was sitting on the bed staring out the window like a lost little boy.

  "I'm sorry," I whispered as I stood in the bathroom doorway. "My nerves are shot, and this baby makes my hormones do crazy things."

  Nick nodded without saying anything. He patted the bed beside him, and shifted as he beckoned me to join him. I shuffled over and slowly lowered myself down without saying a word. I knew he was having a tough go of things lately, but so was I. Deciding to break the silence first I mumbled, "You can't treat me like this. I'm here, and I'm fine right now."

  "I can't lose you," he turned to face me. "Don't you see that Leah? I can't lose you," he balled his hands into fists and growled. "I'm trying here, I really am, but I'm scared. Scared that I'm gonna miss something…a sign…a moment…something and I'm gonna turn around one day and you're gonna be gone. I just…I can't," he looked up at me and a lone tear began to leak from the corner of his eye. "Don't you understand that?"

  I did…I did understand it…I was afraid too. I didn’t want to think about that though. I wanted to pretend like everything was fine. I didn’t want to always worry that something was gonna happen to me. I couldn’t. I’d never survive this pregnancy if I was always wondering what the next minute held for me.

  “I do get it,” I leaned into him and let my forehead drop on his shoulder. “I don’t know what I’d do if something ever happened to you,” I sniffed as I wiped at my eyes. "You need to understand though…you can't hover over me. I'm here, and I'm fine right now…and you're going to drive me nuts if you keep this up," I tried to smile as I looked up at him.

  “I’ll try harder…ok?” he pressed a kiss to the top of my head.

  "Ok," I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed. "Can I tell you something now?"

  "Sure," he shrugged.

  “Well…I woke up to something going on in there,” I pointed at the wall that we shared with the room next door.

  "Really?" Nick gave an amused grin.

  "Un huh," I giggled. "I think Avery finally gave in. They were talking and laughing."

  "Well damn, my brother works fast," Nick chuckled.

  "You think he'll still stay on the couch tonight?" I giggled.

  "I hope so. Otherwise, I'm going to have to invest in some earplugs," he groaned.

  “What?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

  Nick rolled his eyes as he turned and grasped my shoulders. He lowered his head so his eyes were looking directly into mine, "You heard them laughing…what do you think we're gonna hear if they're in there tonight?"

  "Good point," I nodded. "Get me some earplugs too."

  "I'll buy them in bulk," Nick grinned. "They've been dancing around one another for months. I'm sure it's gonna get pretty bad," he wagged his brows as he stood from the bed. "I've got dinner ready. Wanna come out to the kitchen and eat with me?"

  "Sounds great, but I can get there myself," I pushed myself to a standing position and began waddling toward to the door. "You coming?" I glanced over my shoulder to see Nick grinning at me. "What?"

  "Nothing," he shook his head "I just can't believe how beautiful you are, and that you're mine."

  ooooooooo

  Nick

  Once I had Leah seated at the table, I began placing dishes in front of us. I’d made way too much food, but I couldn't help it. I wanted to take care of her. She'd barely eaten anything over the last couple of days, and I wanted to make sure the baby was healthy. I'd made chicken, pasta, bread, salad, and broccoli. Leah sat quietly as she stared at the spread.

  “Do you ever do anything small?' she glanced up at me as she sipped her water.

  "I wanted to make sure the baby was getting enough," I shrugged.

  “I don’t think I can eat all this, besides," she rubbed her belly "I'm already fat."

  I stopped what I was doing and stared at her with my mouth hanging open. I couldn’t believe the words that had just come out of her mouth.

  “You are not fat,” I narrowed my eyes at her as I moved to stand behind her chair. “You’re pregnant.” I leaned down and kissed her temple.

  “I know," she trembled as she fought to hold her emotions in check. "I just… will you still want me…I mean after the baby's born?" she looked up at me. "My body's going be different," she mumbled.

  I know I must have had a crazy look on my face because I couldn’t believe the change in events. These mood swings were killing me. We were going from making out to fighting to crying to I don’t know what. She was swinging between them so fast I could hardly keep up. “Look at me,” I knelt down and gripped her chin between my thumb and forefinger, “I’ll always find you beautiful…no matter what. It doesn’t matter how you change, or what you do…you are always gonna be just as beautiful as the day I first saw you," I paused to make sure she was listening to me. "Do understand that?"

  She nodded as she sucked her lower lip into her mouth, "Yes."

  "Now," I stood and headed back into the kitchen, "eat your dinner before it gets cold."

  "Yes Dad," Leah giggled and sniffed as she lifted her fork and stuffed a mouthful of pasta in.

  When I turned to join her, my brother decided to make an appearance finally. He came walking down the hall with the biggest grin I'd ever seen on his face as he towed Avery behind him. His shirttail was hanging out, and his hair was sticking up in every direction. Avery had the same stupid grin on her face and was also sporting a nice red hickey on the side of her neck. As I continued to stare at them, they pushed past me and made their way into the kitchen.

  "What have you two been up to?" I asked with an amused tone.

  "Nothing," Cam muttered as he grab two plates out of the cabinet while Avery only giggled and pressed herself tighter into his side.

  "Doesn't look like nothing," I mused as I sipped the beer sitting in front of me. "Seems like a lot of something."

  “Shut it Bro!” Cam turned giving me a warning.

  "Ummm," I scratched my head as I watched them fill their plates. "This is my house," I waved my arm around. "If you're fucking in my house…I have a right to know."

  Leah and Avery exchanged a look that only girls could understand. They seemed to have the code down, and without words were silently having their own conversation.

  “I don’t ask you what you two are doing in your room,” Cam waved his finger between Leah and me, “so don’t ask me what I’m doing,” he raised a brow in understanding as he came over to the table and pulled out a chair for Avery.

&n
bsp; “Can we turn down the testosterone for the remainder of dinner?” Leah murmured as she darted her eyes between us.

  I shook my head as Cam and I grumbled at the same time, "He started it."

  Leah and Avery both rolled their eyes, then Avery cocked her head to the side offering a wicked grin to my brother as she uttered words I really didn't want to hear. "Be nice to your brother, and I'll be nice to you later."

  I coughed as the beer I was currently trying to swallow got lodged in my throat. Cam grinned at me, that little fucker, as he winked at her returning with, "I'm counting on it."

  "Ok you two," Leah piped up. "We've all been waiting for you to get your heads out of your asses, but we really don't need the play-by-play."

  "Thank you," I tossed my head back. "Now can we talk about something else? I'm about to lose my appetite."

  “Now you know how I felt all those years you two were absorbed with one another,” Cam chuckled.

  "I was not that bad," I grumbled as I stuffed another mouthful of food in.

  "Uh, yeah you were. All I ever heard about was how amazing she was…how you were gonna marry her someday…how you wanted to have babies with her…" Cam trailed off.

  Leah turned to look at me as her mouth opened and closed a few time, "You really thought about that back then?"

  I turned to glare at my brother before softening my gaze to look at her, “Yes.” I nodded as I swallowed, “I loved you…I wanted everything with you."

  "Awww Nick," Leah began to tear up again as she let her fork clatter to her plate and covered her mouth.

  “Come on baby, you knew this,” I reached up to cup her cheek before scowling at my brother, “See what you did? You got her crying again."

  "Sorry dude," Cam shrugged. "I thought she knew."

  "I did," Leah sobbed. "I've just never heard anyone confirm it. It feels nice," she wiped at her eyes. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess."

  “Don’t be,” I rubbed her cheek. “You’ve got an excuse,” I murmured before turning my gaze on my brother and his new obsession, "they don't. They've been talking in circles for months."