Walking in the Shadows

by Giovanni, Cassandra

  “Did she really break your heart?”

  He stepped closer to me. “Not really, she’s just holding it secretly as opposed to openly now.”

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as I tried to make my brain keep working, but it was impossible with the heat of his body so close to mine and his cologne working like amnesia gas. His hand was on my cheek again and his arm slowly pulled my waist to his own.“What I’m wondering is, does she still want it?”

  I opened my eyes and searched his. “How could you even ask?”

  He was about to kiss me, and I was about to let him when his phone rang, making us both jump and separate. He pulled his phone out of his pocket clumsily; his brain had obviously stopped working too.

  “Hi Dad…Yeah, I know Aunt Cathy is going to drive you nuts, but you have Meg and Bri—I know I’m your only savior…I can’t Dad…I’m already here though…Where? At a friend’s house…Yes, it’s a girl…yes, it’s the girl…I know I need to be careful…” He frowned and looked me, saying, “Do you have a turkey? Wait…Dad why do you need to know if she has a turkey? My dad wants to know what we’re having for dinner.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “Sorry, I only made pie.”

  “She only made pies….come on Dad, why do you need to know…fine—what kind of pies?” Tad asked.

  “Apple and pumpkin,” I answered and motioned to my flour covered clothing, “from scratch.”

  He repeated my answer. “What’s her address? She lives in the same complex as Toby…wait? What? Dad!” He hung up the phone. “My dad’s bringing the turkey and all the fixings from the grocery store. He’ll be here in half an hour after he convinces them to give him one that he didn’t order.”

  “Your Aunt Cathy must be a really scary person,” I commented, unable to stop smiling.

  “Yeah, he can’t stand to be around her when I’m not there. I’m really sorry…we can always lock him out?”

  “I like turkey though and it’s not fair for you to give up your family to spend time with me. I’d like to meet your dad,” I replied, and I then looked down at myself. “Crap, how long did he say?”

  “Half an hour,” he answered with a smirk.

  “When the timer goes off take the pies out of the oven,” I ordered as I turned into the bathroom. I showered and threw on a light dusting of make up before walking out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel.

  Tad’s eyes widened. “What I wouldn’t give to have x-ray vision right now.”

  I don’t know what I was thinking as I let the towel fall before I turned into my bedroom.

  “That’s not fair!” Tad yelled from the living room, his voice semi-breathless. When I walked out clothed he looked up at me with his face red. “You can hurt a guy doing something like that.”

  “You don’t look hurt,” I remarked as I bit my lip. He closed his eyes, and I picked up the towel and threw it at him. “Stop imagining it.”

  He opened his eyes just as the towel hit him in the face. He then leapt the short distance across the room towards me and pulled me into his arms. “You’re a tease!”

  I wrapped my arms around his neck. “I have to look at you every day in tight button up shirts and sexy ties that are very tempting to yank on. “You’re the tease.”

  He kissed my neck and my whole body began to tingle.

  “I should have worn a tie,” he replied.

  My head felt fuzzy and light, as if my brain had been replaced with Christmas tinsel and my heart felt like it would explode before I could finish the countdown of seconds before his lips touched me again.

  “I’ve missed you,” I whispered.

  He jumped as the doorbell rang, “Damn it, Dad!”

  I let the breath I had been holding out and ran my hand through my hair. “He has impeccable timing doesn’t he?”

  “With how long I’ve waited to kiss you, he can wait another minute.”

  “He told you to be careful, didn’t he? He knows, then?”

  The doorbell rang again. “He knows some of the story, but not all of it.”

  “Okay,” I said before going to open the door, and then, brightly, “I’m sorry, Mr. Knightley! I didn’t mean to keep you waiting; your son was being a pain in my ass.”

  Tad’s father was an older, grayer and just as handsome version of him. He punched Tad’s shoulder in greeting. “He’s a pain in my ass, too, but not as much as Crazy Cat Cathy.”

  I took the bags of food away from him. “Crazy Cat Cathy?” I repeated over my shoulder as I walked into my kitchen to get plates and utensils. Tad and his father followed me to help.

  “Sometimes my brother in-law tells me a little too much about his wife,” Tad’s father grimaced, his eyes wide in mock horror.

  “Dad, seriously I don’t want to hear that, nor imagine it. I’m all set imagining something else,” Tad said, and winked at me.

  My face became the color of my sweater. “Tad!”

  His father raised an eyebrow. “So that’s why it took so long to answer the door. I warned you I would be here in thirty minutes!”

  “Oh. My. God!” I muttered closing my eyes. “No, not at all.”

  When I opened my eyes I saw Tad smiling at me. “Teasing you is just so very fun.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Too bad you’re not wearing a tie.”

  “Oh! That’s a little kinky now, isn’t it?” Tad’s dad commented, pulling the delicious smelling turkey out of the bag.

  Tad shrugged. “Yup, it’s too bad.”

  “Ughh…I can never get you back!”

  “It’s a Knightley thing,” his dad said. “The name is George, by the way…no need to call me Mr. Knightley.”

  I offered my hand, “Vera Macintyre; it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  He shook my hand. “She’s a polite one—and pretty, too.”

  “Thanks,” I responded, taking a seat.

  “So all you two were going to eat was pie?” George asked as Tad took the seat next to me and he sat across.

  “Well, I wasn’t expecting anyone,” I said.

  “Why would you make pies then?”

  “Dad…”

  “To keep busy.” I replied.

  “I didn’t mean to pry,” George said as he took in my expression. “Well, now we can all enjoy each other, and I don’t have to deal with Cathy.”

  “It’s a win, win, and I haven’t had a turkey dinner in a really long time,” I commented as I felt Tad’s hand find mine and squeeze. “Thank you, both of you. I really needed this.”

  George smiled. “Tad has said a lot of good things about you…ever since you met in that coffee shop—reading Chaucer was it?”

  “He told you about that?” I asked.

  “I think he told every one of his friends too,” George answered with a wink. “Guys night became talk about Vera night.”

  I choked on my drink. “Seriously?”

  “That’s a little bit of an overstatement,” Tad interjected, and I saw his Dad knew how to embarrass him.

  “Okay, okay it’s an overstatement, but he never told me any of that kind of stuff until he met you, but I guess that’s because he’s never been in l—”George didn’t finished because Tad coughed.

  “This turkey is great. How did you convince them to give it to you?” Tad added as he shook his head at his father.

  “It didn’t take much, I mean with these good looks,” George replied and turned to me. “See this is one thing you have to look forward to—the Knightley men age well.”

  I wasn’t quite sure what to say. “I can tell.”

  Tad was laughing, “You,” he began, “think,” he was choking now, “my dad is hot!”

  “What?” I stuttered. “No, I mean…that’s not what I meant!”

  “That’s basically what you just said,” Tad reiterated, calming down.

  I pouted looking down at my plate. “You,” I said lifting my fork filled with mashed potatoes. “Suck.” I flung the potato at him and hit him right on the
cheek.

  In an instant I was on the floor with Tad on top of me smothering me with stuffing. Tad thought he had gotten me good, but I could see his dad standing behind him with the bowl of cranberry sauce.

  “I take Vera’s side,” George said as he dumped the contents of the bowl.

  “Huh?” Tad asked, turning to get a face full of sauce.

  “Oh, man!” I gasped getting up. “He got you—“I started to lose my footing on the food covered hardwood.

  “Vera!” Tad yelled rushing to catch me, but instead he tumbled forward and we both hit the ground in each other’s arms.

  “Ouch, my butt!” I gasped for air.

  George was about to fall over with laughter. “That was classic!”

  Tad shook his head, giving me a hand so I could stand. “She does stuff like that all the time…you should have seen what she did to the poor produce guy—grapes everywhere!”

  “That—that was your fault, you scared me,” I defended myself as I pulled pieces of stuffing out of my hair.

  “Nice one. I think it’s your fault Tad—she’s a victim,” George responded, going to the kitchen and getting some paper towels.

  “Finally, someone to take my side,” I huffed as I picked up the plates from the table. “You two clean that up, and I’ll do some dishes.”

  I went into the kitchen and began to fill the sink with water. When I turned I could hear Tad and his Dad whispering to one another. I stopped by the door frame.

  “I can see why you love her—you two are a perfect match,” George commented.

  “Yeah, the whole situation sucks.”

  “Are you still broken up?” George asked, and Tad must have nodded because he continued, “Even so, it’s obvious how you feel about each other…until she graduates you need to be careful. You won’t be a teacher for long if anyone finds out.”

  “It’s different when we’re at school,” Tad retorted.

  “All I’m saying son, is you’re still her teacher until May—you can’t forget that even if you love her. It’s going to have to wait. This whole move was stupid,” George chastised, and I heard Tad begin to refute him, and George interrupted with, “but it was the right thing to do…it’s just risky, but you’re both grownups, so I trust you two are going about this the right way.”

  “We’re broken up—for now,” Tad explained.

  “Until the end of the school year?”

  “I can’t promise anything Dad. It’s hard enough now.”

  The tension was beginning to build in the air. “What’s taking so long?” I asked, peaking around the door frame at them.

  Tad could tell from the expression on my face that I had heard. His dad’s face was red, and I felt that he might be able to read me just as well as Tad. He looked down at his watch.

  “Look at that! The game should be on now? Do you mind?” George asked, nodding to the TV.

  I shook my head. “Of course not, the remote is on the coffee table.”

  “Sweet flat screen! Good taste in TV’s; yup, this one’s a keeper Tad,” George commented.

  “I’ll help you with the rest of the dishes,” Tad suggested, picking up the last plates and following me into the kitchen.

  We washed them without speaking, but I knew we needed to talk. “He’s right, Tad.”

  “You’re a keeper? I know that,” Tad teased.

  “That we should keep this teacher—student until the end of the year and then if you feel the same—”

  “If I feel the same? I can guarantee I’ll feel the same.”

  “I will too.”

  “I don’t know if I can wait.”

  “This goes both ways—I’ll make you,” I said, looking over at him.

  “It’s that easy for you?” He asked, stepping back from the sink.

  “That’s not what—”

  “I love you Vera, and I know you don’t want me to say it and maybe you don’t feel the same—”

  “Are you kidding me?” I cut him off and pain shot though my hand. I looked down to red water. “Crap!” I lifted my hand out of the sink to find a good size gouge from a knife.

  Tad dragged me to the bathroom. “She cut herself!”

  “She okay?” George asked from the couch as Tad shut the bathroom door behind him.

  “Yeah,” Tad yelled, sitting me on the toilet while tears streamed down my face. He rummaged through the medicine cabinet, causing bottles to fall into the sink. “Here it is.” He wrapped my hand in gauze bandages and then looked up at me. “It's okay; not too deep.”

  I turned my face away as he tried to wipe away the tears. “Are you okay?” he asked as he used his hand to turn my face to his own.

  I swallowed. “How could you think,” I choked as I shook my head trying to calm down, “that I don’t love you? I love you, Tad! From the moment I saw you I knew there was no one else in the world besides you.”

  “That’s why you’re crying?” he asked, pulling me into his arms. “I’m sorry, Vera. I just…it’s just so hard.”

  “Am I really worth it?”

  “Don’t be silly, you are and my Dad knows it. That’s why he said what he said,” Tad replied, brushing my hair out of my eyes.

  “We should probably watch the game with him; let him know I didn’t cut my hand off or something,” I suggested with a weak smile.

  “Geez, you are accident prone, huh?” George asked as I showed him my bandaged hand.

  “Yup, Tad keeps saving me, though.”

  He nodded towards a photo on the TV stand. “Are those your parents?”

  “Yeah.”

  “They look very familiar,” George observed with a frown.

  “We’re from Norfolk County—Tad didn’t tell you?”

  “I didn’t feel it was my place to tell,” Tad said as we sat on the couch.

  “Norfolk County, isn’t that where…oh…” George stopped before carefully saying, “The Martins?”

  “Abigail Martin,” I nodded as Tad wrapped his arm around me.

  “I see…wow…that’s…I’m sorry Vera—I mean Abigail,” George responded in confusion.

  “Don’t worry about it and you can just call me Vera…no one knows except Tad, my friend Kirsten and her family and now you…”

  “Football is boring,” Tad observed.

  “Sure is,” I seconded with a smirk. “I got a new book on my e-reader.”

  “E-reader?” Tad asked. “You finally got yourself one?”

  “Want to see?”

  “You two are meant for each other,” George commented, stretching out on the couch as I slid open a drawer on the coffee table and pulled it out.

  “Sweet,” Tad said, and I leaned back into his arms. “What’s the book?”

  “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.”

  “You haven’t read that yet?”Tad asked.

  “Only the Wishbone version.”

  “You really are adorable,” Tad laughed.

  “I know.”

  Chapter 20

  It seemed that as I got older each holiday came quicker than the last. This year was no different, and it hollowed me out to know it was one less that I would have with my parents, and one more that I would spend alone—that I had decided I should spend alone. I was organizing a rack of jeans by size when Kirsten came in the door.

  “Hey girl! So how was your Christmas?” Kirsten asked, and I didn’t know what to say. She continued when I was silent. “Did Tad surprise you again?”

  “He called a couple of times,” I replied flatly as I walked to a different part of the store with a pile of clothes to hang.

  “Did you pick up?” she probed, and when I didn’t answer again she sighed heavily, and demanded, “Why not?”

  “I didn’t want to tempt him to do something stupid.”I snapped, shoving the clothes on the rack.

  “Are you trying to torture yourself?”

  “That’s not it. I just didn’t want to risk him getting caught,” I replied as several shirts fell off
their hangers from the force of my shove.

  “Really? Is that it? Or are you trying to hide your pain from him—even from yourself?” she suggested, taking the clothes that I still had away from me and throwing them on to the nearest chair before grabbing my shoulders.

  “Kirsten, please, not now,” I begged in response as I swallowed down my emotions.

  “I’m sorry Vera. I really am, but it’s okay to feel and it’s also okay to be happy. That’s the real reason you left those calls unanswered.”

  “I can’t defend myself.” I shook my head.

  “You need a break; why don’t you take the day off?” Kirsten ordered more than suggested as she let go of my sagging shoulders. “I know you were here on Christmas straightening things up and working for free.”

  “Sorry, I needed something to do.”

  “And you haven’t taken a day off in a month,” she continued to chastise.

  “Yeah.”

  “You’ll need a dress for the winter formal, won’t you?” There was a clever gleam in her eyes.

  “Come on, really?”

  “Wait here.” She wagged her finger at me before leaving the sales floor. When she came back, she had a large present wrapped with happy, dancing penguins.

  “Come on, really?” I repeated as I shook my head. The penguins really did make me smile, though.

  “You seriously thought that we wouldn’t get you something? Really?” she teased, shaking the present in my face.

  “You are the best—and worst—friend a person could ever have,” I said, but my whole body was shaking in anticipation. Those penguins. They were driving me insane with excitement. “Okay, give it to me!”

  Kirsten’s smile widened. “I knew they’d do you in.”

  “Shut up, and give it to me!”

  “Alright, alright...”

  I got an adrenaline rush as the smooth wrapping paper touched my hands, and I rushed to rip it into shreds. When I got down to the bare box I paused and took a deep breath before lifting the lid.

  “Oh…my.” I could barely breathe as I laid my hands on the light blue silk dress before me. I ran my fingers over the rough lace of the straps and took another deep breath. “This is too much.”