When Colour Became Grey

by A Lorenzen

  When we finally did detach from each other, Ben looked at me with his soothing green eyes. They were so mellow I could get lost in them.

  He took my hand and led me into his apartment. I shed my jacket and shoes, following him into the bedroom across from the entrance. I took off my sweater and gestured him closer. Ben kissed me intensely, while we undressed each other. I could feel his hot breath on my neck. Teasingly, slowly, I took off his long-sleeved shirt. He had several large tattoos, inked over his chest and arms. Ben pulled me closer, holding me with his strong arms. Emerald eyes inspected my body as if to memorize each individual cell. He kissed me passionately and we fell into the bed…

  With his hand he brushed a few strains of hair out of my face. With the tips of my fingers I outlined his numerous tattoos.

  ‘Tell me about them,’ I whispered.

  Ben looked down at the art sprawled on his skin. ‘Which one?’

  I pointed to the one across his right shoulder and chest; four playing cards, all in black ink, spreading from his shoulder towards his heart.

  ‘The first card is the Joker. He has two faces, one happy, one sad. Even if he gets you out of trouble, it always comes at a price. The second one is the Queen of Spades, represented by Medusa. She’s a goddess from the ancient Greek mythology. To me it means there are always two sides to things; even a beautiful woman can have hair made of snakes. The third one is the Ace of Diamonds.’ He pointed to the card with a skull topped by a burning candle. The letter ‘A’ was on the top left and bottom right corners. ‘This means that people might be dead, but they’re not really gone, so you should not speak ill of them. And the last one is the Jack of Clubs. It’s a reminder to have fun in life because it could all be over unexpectedly.’

  There was another colourful tattoo on his left arm stretching from the top of his shoulder to almost the crease of his elbow. It was a drawing of an owl looking straight at you. ‘What about this one?’ I traced along the outskirts.

  ‘I saw this drawing one day. I decided it would make a great tattoo,’ he chuckled to himself.

  A vibrating sound interrupted us. It came from the floor somewhere. Kissing Ben once more I swung out of bed and picked up my buzzing jacket.

  ‘Kim, this is not a good time,’ I answered, falling back onto bed.

  Ben rolled over, planting gentle kisses, hovering over my naked body.

  ‘Are you still with Ben?’ Kim whispered.

  ‘Yes, why? Is there a problem? Why are you whispering?’ I lowered my voice as well. With my free hand I surfed through Ben’s hair and down his back. I had a hard time paying attention to Kim as Ben started kissing me more intensely using his tongue.

  ‘I just overheard Dominic on the phone. He said that I was here and that I have been here the whole day by myself, so I’m guessing it was someone who wanted to know where my other half was, and since you’re my other half I think you’re in trouble!’

  Ben looked up as my body tensed.

  ‘It looks like even though you passed your test, someone wants to know where you are! Get your ass home and find a really good explanation to tell your warden!’ I put the phone down, my lips pressed into a frown.

  ‘Trouble?’ Ben guessed, sitting up in the bed.

  ‘Blake is being annoying again. I better get home.’ I rolled my eyes, exasperated.

  We both got dressed reluctantly, but not overly hurrying. We enjoyed being around each other too much. Anyway, Blake knew I had lied to him, no point in rushing towards an exploding volcano.

  ‘What exactly was your cover story?’ Ben asked when he escorted me out of his place to the elevator.

  ‘That I was hanging out with Kim.’ I shrugged my shoulders.

  ‘I guess there is not much else Blake would have allowed anyway…’

  Ben held my hand in the elevator. To think that just a few hours ago our time together was just beginning… and now it had come to a car-crashing-into-a-wall sudden stop.

  ‘He doesn’t understand he can’t tell me what to do. He can’t keep me away from you.’

  Ben and I kissed several times as I stood by the open car door.

  ‘Let me know when you’re safe, ok?’ He gave me one last hug before letting me get into my car.

  I smiled sheepishly at him and was sure I was blushing.

  When I opened the front door and took my shoes off, I overheard Blake arguing with Caleb. It could only be Caleb because I felt strangely at ease. At the same time, I was filled with dread; having lied and being found out by Blake was one thing, but Caleb’s disappointment would be like knives in my chest again.

  As I arrived at the top of the stairs, they both stood still. Caleb smiled at me while Blake quietly brewed, throwing darts at me with his eyes. Then Blake shifted to pacing up and down next to the two chairs close to the windows, eyes following me, breathing rigidly. The veins on his arms and neck were showing. This promised to be fun!

  I sat down in my chair and waited. As Blake kept on pacing furiously around, Caleb sat in Blake’s chair and folded his hands together. ‘Ameerah, you told us you were with Kim, but when we called her, Dominic said she had not left the apartment.’

  I could feel my throat closing up. It felt like I had swallowed sand. ‘I didn’t mean to worry you. I…’ I stopped. It was impossible to lie to Caleb. But I didn’t want to admit I had been with Ben. Blake would undoubtedly interject his opinion again and I was afraid Caleb would side with him. Why else had he not told Blake to leave me alone?

  I looked up at Blake who had frozen in place and was staring me. A loud gulp was audible when I tried to swallow; the sand had transformed into jagged glass.

  ‘Tell your master who you were with,’ I heard Blake’s voice, ramping up the pressure.

  I drew in a shaky deep breath, but no air seemed to reach my lungs. I shook my head in all directions, resisting as best as I could.

  Caleb reached over and held my arm. ‘Who were you with my dear?’

  The connection immediately numbed me to all sense of resistance and I immediately caved at his request.

  ‘I was with Ben,’ I answered in a dreamy state.

  As soon as I answered, Caleb detached his hand and I was back in the living room, but much more relaxed than before. I was grinning, until my eyes met Blake’s.

  His steel-blue eyes tried to kill me.

  ‘I told you to stay away from him!’ Blake growled in a low yet deadly tone.

  I sighed and rolled my eyes. Caleb’s drug made me feel safe from Blake’s wrath.

  ‘Don’t you dare roll your eyes at me! You do as I say! You will not see him again!’ Blake exploded, pointing his finger at me.

  Caleb glanced disapprovingly at Blake. ‘Leave us,’ was all he said, before Blake had time to unleash all his anger. He stormed down the stairs and smacked the door closed.

  ‘My child, do you like Ben?’ Caleb asked with a knowing wink.

  I nodded without hesitation.

  ‘If he makes you happy, you can see whomever you wish,’ he encouraged me. But before I got too excited his face changed. I detected anxiety. ‘Ben has a… dark past…’

  ‘I know,’ I hurried to say.

  ‘Tell me what you know,’ he commanded.

  ‘His, eh… recruit was killed by vampires.’

  ‘Did Ben tell you anything else?’

  I shook my head.

  Caleb leant back and placed his hands in his lap. ‘I want you to do something for me. If Ben says anything to you about his recruit, I want you to tell me.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know if he will want me to say-’

  ‘My child, I do not wish to cause problems for Ben. He is a good man. What happened to his recruit was tragic, but I believe, like you, there is something we don’t know. I have suspicions but I cannot be sure.’ Caleb leant forward again and touched my forearm. ‘Don’t worry, my dear. I only have good intentions. Ben might need our help, but he is too stubborn to ask for it. So, if he tells you something, let me know. D
o not tell Ben about our arrangement.’

  Caleb enforced this last sentence looking intensely into my eyes. There was no denying him anything. He was my master, literally. I would not, no, could not lie to him or keep something from him. I was completely at his mercy.

  Caleb let go of my arm and I felt relieved. His request had put a lot of weight on my shoulders and it was as if the air above me had become water, but when he finally let go of me, so did the feeling of responsibility.

  Caleb raised himself up from the chair and waved from the window to Blake. Blake re-entered the house, still fuming. I was worried Caleb would tell him what we had discussed.

  ‘Ameerah is a grown woman and she has been field approved. You will now work together and keep your killing numbers up. I do not want to have any issues with the council because you haven’t killed enough. Have I made myself clear?’ Caleb’s sharp voice did not leave room for any protest.

  ‘Ameerah my child, you will listen to Blake and obey his rules unconditionally.’ His razorblade voice cut sharper than betrayal.

  ‘Yes Caleb,’ I stuttered, the muscles tightened around my lungs. I avoided Caleb’s look.

  ‘Blake.’ Caleb finally took the stage light off me. The grip around my chest lightly decelerated. ‘You will keep your inquiries only to relevant subjects. What Ameerah does in her free time is none of your business, as long as it does not endanger her or you.’ Caleb was much softer with Blake, making me jealous. Blake was the one watching me like a hawk and sticking his nose in my private business!

  As soon as I formed that thought, Caleb’s eyes were on me. I was painfully reminded he could read my emotions. My face ran hot.

  ‘I will leave you two. Blake, we can speak tomorrow on drawing up a schedule for Ameerah.’ Caleb smiled at me. Immediately my mood lifted. He walked towards me, laid one hand on my arm, filling me with his drug. ‘I’ll speak to you later, my child.’

  My eyes opened and he was gone.

  ‘Does he always disappear when I have my eyes closed?’ I wondered out loud.

  ‘He makes you close your eyes and then disappears.’ Blake said, although I had not asked him. Our gazes crossed again after the slapping we had received. We were both eager to please Caleb, so we would have to try. Neither of us liked the idea. And neither of us trusted the other.

  * * *

  It was very hot; so hot it was hard to breathe. Blake and I stood to the left of a front door to an apartment in a dark blue corridor. Kim and Dominic stood on the right side of the door. We were all geared up with heavy machine guns, handguns, knives, and ammunition. I felt like a soldier, but at the same time I felt very much out of place. I never wanted to be a soldier. I didn’t ask to go out and kill supernatural beings. And yet, here I was.

  I took a deep breath and checked the safety. With a tiny nod of his head, Blake indicated it was time. We were all tense. A bead of sweat ran down my forehead.

  Blake and Dominic blasted through the door first. Kim and I followed behind just half a second later. The two trainers were already shooting at the vampire. To my surprise when we stormed in, I saw two vampires instead of one. The anxiety in me rose immediately.

  The entrance led into the kitchen with an island in the middle, providing some cover. Blake and Dominic were by the kitchen island and as soon as Kim and I had reached them, they ducked behind the island and reloaded their weapons. Kim and I fired continuously at the two creatures. The vampires were standing close to one another and tried to approach us, but their movements were slowed due to the impacts of the gunshots. One of the creatures started to tumble; the other tried to shield himself with his arms.

  The moment I ran out of bullets I slid back behind the wall to my right and Blake emerged to keep firing. As quickly as I could, I reloaded and got back to firing at the creatures. One of the vampires was down; the second one tumbled out of sight, followed by a loud thump. Blake went down to reload. We ceased fire. My ears rang from the shots and I couldn’t make out anything but muffled sounds.

  ‘Stay here,’ Dom shouted to Kim and me, and went towards the vampire sprawled on the floor. Blake got up and went after the one that was out of sight.

  The trainers reappeared and were much more relaxed. Both vampires were dead. I sighed in relief and let my head fall back into my neck. I took off the band in my hair and let it unfurl over my shoulders.

  ‘Can’t you wait until we’re at least in the car?’ Blake scolded. The others were busy splashing alcohol onto the two vampires.

  I made a face at him when he had his back turned. Kim saw it and chuckled. Dominic lit a match and let it fall to the floor. The noxious alcohol immediately caught fire and spread like wildfire. I had located the fire extinguisher in the hall and went to get it. We watched the dead bodies burn for several minutes before I put the fire out.

  Kim and I left the apartment and made our way out to the cars while the two trainers discussed tactics further behind us. The sun was low and the air ripe for a thunderstorm. It had been so damn hot in that hallway; there were windows everywhere trapping the sunrays inside and heating up the building like a greenhouse.

  ‘Any plans for tonight?’ Kim asked me.

  ‘Seeing Ben, you?’

  ‘I think I’ll go to the pub. I want to play pool and relax.’

  ‘Do you want me to come with you for a bit?’ I felt bad for leaving her on her own.

  ‘No, no, go have fun with Ben, don’t worry about me.’ She kissed me on my cheek.

  ‘See ya later,’ Dominic called from behind us and walked towards his Ferrari. He sped off with squealing tyres.

  Men. I rolled my eyes.

  ‘I’ll see you later.’ Kim also disappeared into her car and only Blake and I were left in the parking lot.

  ‘Caleb is waiting for us at home,’ Blake told me.

  ‘Fine,’ I conceded and went around my Dodge Challenger and opened the boot. There I laid down my M-16 and started taking off my clothes. They were drenched in sweat.

  ‘What are you doing? We need to go,’ Blake asked perplexed, standing in front of the open driver’s door of his truck.

  ‘Just give me a minute. I’ll be right behind you!’ I answered trying to hide my annoyance.

  Blake shook his head and drove off in his rusty rattle-machine. My car was much faster than his anyway. I would still arrive way before him!

  The moment he was out of sight I took out my phone and dialled Ben’s number. I held the telephone between my right shoulder and head while I took off my pants. ‘Hey babe, just wanted to tell you we’re done.’

  ‘How many did you take down?’ Ben asked. Hearing his voice immediately calmed my nerves.

  ‘Two. It was supposed to be just one, but we got them both.’

  ‘Are you on your way here then?’

  ‘No, I have to talk to Caleb first and then I’ll come over. Give me an hour or so, ok?’ I had slipped into a pair of daisy dukes and a see-through top.

  ‘Ok honey. I’ll see you later then. Love you.’

  ‘Love you too.’

  With shades on my eyes, I closed the boot and got into the car. I rolled the windows down and blasted the stereo. It didn’t take long for me to catch up with Blake. As I passed him, I winked and sped on, refraining from flipping him off. When he finally arrived at the house, I had already taken the gear out of the boot and was cleaning up my mess.

  ‘You should really stop taking your clothes off right after we kill vampires, or molochs for that matter,’ Blake said.

  I grunted in acknowledgement.

  ‘It’s dangerous to linger around there with your scent spreading. Another vampire might surprise you!’ he added.

  ‘How many times have we done this now and nothing has happened?’ I reminded him.

  ‘You just need one single mistake to get killed by vampires… in your sleep,’ Blake stated, taking a bottle of water and splashing some on his face.

  ‘That’s why I sleep with a gun under my pillow,’ I stated
putting the guns away in the designated part of the living room.

  ‘I’m guessing you will be out with him again?’ he asked without making any effort to hide his disgust.

  The entrance door opened and a sense of ease announced him before he was visible.

  ‘My child! How are you?’ Caleb greeted me with a light hug. The intense feeling of happiness calmed me and I refrained from responding to Blake’s insult. ‘How was the raid?’

  ‘There were two, but we killed them,’ Blake said in matter-of-fact tone.

  Caleb looked at the both of us. ‘Oh, have we been fighting again?’ he teased us.

  Blake and I threw looks at each other. ‘No, everything is fine,’ Blake responded.

  ‘Meerah?’ Caleb turned and I could feel his eyes on me. I nodded my head. This incessant bickering couldn’t be qualified as fighting. We had had fights that ended in screams and gestures. We let our frustration out daily in our training. This was harmless.

  ‘Good. My child I need to speak to Blake for a moment.’

  I turned to Blake, annoyed. ‘You told me he needed to see both of us!’

  Blake remained cold. ‘My mistake.’

  Of course, as if it hadn’t been on purpose. When I turned to leave, I saw out of the corner of my eye a look exchanged between Caleb and Blake.

  ‘Talk to him, Caleb!’

  Rolling the windows down, I tapped the accelerator and saw Blake from the corner of my eye standing by the living room window. I reached into the glove compartment and got out a pack of cigarettes. Lighting the cigarette, I inhaled the delicious poison. After all, I could not get cancer and die in this world, so why not take advantage of it? My right hand held the cigarette and the steering wheel, while my left elbow rested on the open window frame.

  I remembered in the beginning thinking this would be like living in an action movie. And it was, in a way. Sometimes I could hear the audience holding its breath when I was fighting off molochs or an occasional vampire. When I managed to kill the bad guys, I could hear them cheering my name and applauding. The men in my life were hot enough to be in a movie. But an action movie lasted two hours at most. In the end the bad guys died and that was it: happy ending, big kiss from the two main characters, and drive off into the sunset.