Lost in the Mist of Time

by Karen Michelle Nutt

  “Safe?” His brows furrowed. “Ye don’t feel safe?”

  “I am not sure of anything anymore. I just would feel better if you were here.”

  “Then I’ll stay.” He didn’t want her to feel frightened, and God forgive him, if this was the only way he could be near her, he would take it. He heard a grumbling sound and he quirked a brow at her. “What was that?”

  “My stomach rebelling.” She placed her hand on her midsection. “I’m hungry,” she defended herself.

  He actually chuckled. “We better find ye something then. Come. I know just where we can find a snack before we dine tonight.”

  He was good to his word. They convinced the cook to let them take a few morsels with them. Of course, Dougray had to bribe the man. He handed Aislinn a big chunk of cheese and he had a bottle of wine in his hand. They walked to the far side of the kitchen wall and sat down against it.

  “This is good,” she managed to tell him between mouthfuls.

  He handed her the wine bottle and she actually giggled. “What’s so funny?” he asked not sure what had put her in such a good mood.

  “I feel like a teenager sneaking out to have a drink with her boyfriend.” She gladly took a long swallow.

  He was still studying her when she handed him back the bottle. Her behavior yet again baffled him. If he didn’t know better, back at Dunhaven he would have thought that she had been drugged.

  He regarded her for a moment as something flickered in the back of his mind. According to Teige and Moira, Aislinn became ill later on in her pregnancy, almost nearing her fourth month and steadily became worse until she finally miscarried. Under Neala’s care, she began to heal only to have another relapse, once the old woman returned to her home in the glen.

  Warning spasms alarmed every fiber of his being as the pieces seemed to fall into place, and he didn’t like what he was seeing. He knew Aislinn mourned the loss of their child, but there had been more to it and from the start it had plagued him. She had been lethargic and weak. There should have been no reason for her to have the sickness that is associated with pregnancy when she was no longer pregnant.

  Hadn’t Neala warned him to make sure that he brought Aislinn her meals, that no other hand should touch them? And he had followed those instructions, until she was able to start eating solid foods again. Soon after, she seemed to have days that her stomach bothered her, so much so that she was unable to bring herself out of bed.

  Now that he was on this track, he thought back. Fiona’s death came to mind. Her condition had been similar to Aislinn’s. She complained of a stomach ailment and eventually could not keep her food down. She had not been ill before they had locked her in the tower, but yet her health diminished

  rapidly. Within a month, she was dead.

  Fiona’s elimination could be explained, if she had been able to point a finger at the ones involved with Aislinn’s kidnapping. It would only seem logical that someone would want to have her silenced.

  His misgivings increased. If Teige had not hastened him to Dunhaven when he had, Aislinn could have died too. Dar Dia! It had been a miracle that she hadn’t perished with their child. “Poison,” he muttered under his breath. Why had he not thought of that sooner?

  “What did you say?” “Aislinn, how do ye feel?”

  “It’s amazing, but I actually feel a hundred percent better. I don’t feel sluggish. My stomach doesn’t feel nauseated. I guess that I should thank you for forcing me to leave my room.” She became solemn then, the laughter falling from her face. Dougray placed a hand on hers as he saw her start to withdraw. He sighed regrettably for he didn’t know how to bring her past the guilt that she carried.

  “Ye have to stop blaming yerself for what happened, Aislinn.”

  “I can’t help it. I keep thinking, if only I had stayed calm or if I had eaten better than I had. Cahir was always after me to eat something. I tried, honestly

  I did, but I couldn’t keep half of the food down.” “Cahir brought ye yer meals?”

  “Sometimes. He’s an odd little man. He didn’t seem to like me, but once he knew I was pregnant, he was there giving me all kinds of advice. He was like a hovering shadow.”

  Dougray’s right hand clenched. If he found out that the man had poisoned Aislinn, he would tear him apart limb from limb.

  “I keep hearing my mother’s voice.” Aislinn was lost in thought. “It was

  a warning she gave me when I was young and it has always stayed with me. Now I finally realize what she meant by it.”

  “What’s that?” he asked.

  “You should be careful for what you wish for. You’re liable to have it granted.” There was such anguish in her voice that his heart went out to her.

  “I had prayed that I would not become pregnant…I had wished…I didn’t mean it.” She shook her head. “I didn’t. I was scared. I was….” The tears came then and she choked back a sob. He wanted desperately to put his arms around her, but he was afraid she would push him away.

  “Aislinn, ye did not cause this to happen. Ye are not at fault. Please do not blame yerself for something ye had no control over.”

  “You blame me,” she accused him.

  “Nay, I do not.” This time he didn’t care; he wrapped his arms around her shoulder, and for a moment, she actually leaned against him, clutching his hand. Her lips touched his palm, her tears of grief burning his skin.

  “Dougray….” Without another word, she was on her feet before he could stop her.

  “Aislinn, wait.” But it was no use; she was fleeing as fast as her feet could carry her. Every time they were together, he seemed to cause her more pain.

  He rose from the ground with a forlorn sigh. It was time he found Murrough and shared with him his suspicions of Cahir Dunphy.

  Dougray found him easily enough for he was with the other men, laughing at some age-old story that was being told. When Murrough saw him enter, he immediately walked over to him. “Is something the matter, ye look distressed?”

  “I wish to discuss what I need to tell ye in a more private setting.” Murrough nodded and followed him away from the fire.

  Dougray didn’t waste any time revealing what he suspected about Cahir, not leaving out any of his suspicions concerning Fiona. He waited to hear what Murrough’s thoughts were on the situation.

  “Cahir has disliked Lady Aislinn from the moment she arrived at Dunhaven, and when ye were ill yerself, he had her thrown in the dungeon. He would know which herbs could poison a person slowly, to make it look like they were suffering from an ailment. I agree. He would be the most likely choice for such a deed.”

  “He is a weak man who only can bully his way through life. If he poisoned Fiona and tried to succeed with Aislinn, he had someone else who was helping him along.”

  “Another piece of the puzzle and still no closer to finding out who is behind our problems. I know I always go back to this, but could the Butlers have gotten to Cahir somehow?”

  “Nay, I have decided he is not the hand that is lashing out in this cowardly manner. The Butler is angry and wishes to see me pay for what he feels is an injustice to his daughter. He is not one to hide in the shadows waiting to strike. Nay, someone has formulated a very clever plan making us think the Butler is behind all the misfortunes. I believe this someone is also wanting to make the Butler think the same of us.”

  “What? In hopes that we will eventually kill one another?”

  “Perhaps. Murrough, have you ever thought that Ella’s death might not have been an accident either? I was supposed to ride that mount, not Ella. If a threat of my life was in evident even then, we have the proof we seek that the Butlers were not the ones responsible. Fingham would have never chanced his daughter being in harm’s way.” He clenched his fists. “And now there is Fiona’s death and the murder of my unborn child. Dar Dia, Murrough, they nearly succeeded in ending Aislinn’s life as well. Whoever is responsible will surely pay for the wrong they have caused.”

>   “Do ye wish me to ride back to Dunhaven and confront Cahir? I am sure I can persuade the man to tell us who is behind all this.”

  “Nay, Murrough. There is more at work here than a few people. If we are to get to the bottom of this, I believe we should have Cahir followed and do our best to expose all that are involved. We will send Hamish, for Cahir will not noticed the youth that he has thought of as a cripple.”

  “Ye think the boy will be able to come through? This is a grave business ye send him to do.”

  “He is capable. Send him at once.” “I will see to it, milord.”

  “And Murrough.” “Aye?”

  “Make sure not to mention this to anyone.”

  Aislinn had sought the safety of her room, closing the door securely behind her. She was a fool to have panicked, for all she had wanted was to have him hold her. She was well aware she was still punishing herself for disappointing him, failing him. Her marriage was becoming another one of her relationships that was doomed. Only this time, she didn’t want it to happen.

  The fire was still going and she moved closer to warm the chill from her bones. There was a knock on the door, and for a moment, she allowed her hopes to soar. Maybe Dougray had come after her. “Come in.” She had to hold back the hot tears of disappointment.

  “Milady, I’ve come to help ye dress.” Moira closed the door behind her. “Yer uncle will be here soon.”

  “My uncle?”

  “Didn’t ye know milord asked him to join us?”

  “No, I didn’t.” She wasn’t ready to face her uncle. He would ask questions, want to know how she was doing and if the marriage was faring well. Maybe she could hide away in this room and hope he would go away.

  She thought all this, knowing she would never be that cowardly. Maybe she could manage to put on a façade of happiness, making him believe that everything was all right.

  She turned to Moira with a weak smile. “We must hurry then. I want to look my best.”

  “That’s the spirit. Come and see, A.J., what I have laid out for ye. ’Tis a beautiful blue velvet gown with ribbon to match. I will run the same ribbon through yer hair. It has grown so long, A.J., and it is beautifully thick.” Moira continued to talk, but Aislinn was only half listening to what she was saying.

  The men were already seated when she came to the main hall to dine. Her uncle and Dougray both rose at the same time to greet her. She walked bravely toward them, knowing Aengus would be scrutinizing her appearance. She was well aware she did not look the same as the last time he saw her, but there was nothing she could do about it in this short notice. Thanks to Rhiannon, the woman had seen to the alterations of the gown she now wore.

  It fit to her slim figure without exaggerating her gauntness. Moira had brushed her dark hair until it shone bright in the candlelight, weaving the dark ribbons into her hair and draping it behind her in a twist. She even applied some color to her cheeks making her skin look radiantly smooth and clear. Her dark eyes stood out, large and illuminating with unspoken emotion. She was rather intriguingly stunning, nothing at all like how she was imagining herself to look.

  She had reached her uncle and he took hold of her hand. “My dear, ye are looking well. Dougray told me ye had suffered physically and I had feared the worst.” He bestowed a kiss upon her cheek.

  “Thank you, Uncle.” He offered her a seat beside him at the high table. Dougray’s mouth almost dropped to the floor when he first laid eyes on her. She was simply lovely. So much so, he wanted to sweep her off her feet and take her back upstairs, and kiss her until she realized she belonged with him. He had half the mind to do it, until he reminded himself that there was the matter of her safety to consider. If someone were trying to poison her, then they would not stop there just because it failed the first time. Every moment that she was with him, she was in danger. He had to protect her and that resolve was to send her away, even if it meant the possibility of losing her. He would speak to Hennessy at the first opportunity.

  Dinner went well and Aislinn ate more than she had intended to, but she couldn’t help it. With her appetite coming back in full force, everything smelled and tasted absolutely wonderful.

  Anxious for the meal to be over, Miriam was fidgety in her seat. Finally Dougray leaned near her to whisper in her ear. “Is something the matter, dear sister? Ye act like ye are sitting on prickly thorns.”

  “I am not feeling well.” She didn’t quite meet his gaze, immediately giving Dougray the impression that she was not telling him the truth.

  “Not feeling well?” Aengus had heard her and leaned forward to view his hostess.

  “I fear so.” She did manage to meet Aengus’ gaze. “I have a headache. Would ye mind terribly if I should retire?”

  “Nay, not at all, my dear. Ye should rest. By morning, ye will feel better.” “Thank ye.” She rose from the table.

  “I will check on ye later,” Dougray offered and she nearly jumped down his throat.

  “Nay!” After the outburst and the way that everyone was looking at her, she had to calm herself with a deep breath before she dared to speak again. “Nay, brother, I wish to retire, and if by some chance I am able to fall asleep,

  I do not want to be disturbed. Ye understand?”

  “As ye wish, Miriam. I will see ye in the morning then.”

  She nodded with relief. “Good night,” she bid to everyone before she hurried out of the banquet hall.

  Dougray made eye contact with Murrough and with a nod of his head the man followed her.

  Later into the night Dougray also made his excuses, leaving Aengus the time to pull Aislinn aside for a private conversation. “Ye were most silent this evening, dear. Ye are not suffering from a headache also?”

  She smiled. “No, Uncle, I am fine. Really.”

  “And yer marriage? Will ye be asking a priest to bless this union?”

  She didn’t know what to tell him, but her hesitation gave him cause to question her further. “He has not mistreated ye?”

  “No, he has been generous.”

  “Why do I sense there is more to that statement?”

  “Frankly, I am not sure that Dougray wishes the marriage to continue.” “If he wishes to end it, then ye will have a home with me. Do not fear.” He placed the tip of his fingers on her chin and gently raised her head, so that she was forced to look at him. “Do not fear,” he repeated.

  She nodded. “I wish to retire. I am so very tired.” “Ye do that, my dear.”

  Murrough met Dougray by the stables with his news. “So where does my sister go?”

  “She is in her room, but I believe she is meeting with someone.” “Who and why?

  “I did not see his face but I believe the meeting is of a…ye know…physical nature.”

  Dougray’s eyebrows shot up. “Miriam? Carrying on with a dalliance?” “Aye, milord. Do ye wish for me to find out the identity?”

  He smiled and shook his head. “Nay, Murrough. My sister should be allowed to have some happiness. Let her be.”

  “As ye wish.”

  “Aye, goodnight, Murrough.” He was still thinking about his sister when he entered the castle practically running into Aengus, who obviously had been waiting for him. The man did not look pleased, and in seconds, he knew the reason.

  “Why does Aislinn have the opinion ye will be casting her aside?” Dougray was momentarily taken aback. “She has said this to ye?” “She has hinted as much?”

  “And does she wish it?”

  “What game do we play, Fitzpatrick? I ask a question and ye answer with one of yer own.”

  “I am sorry. I was hoping to have insight to what Aislinn has been thinking. She has not been the same since she lost the baby, and I cannot read what goes on in her head. I have tried to talk to her but…nothing is ever said.

  I am at a loss.”

  “Then ye do not want the marriage to end come Beltane?”

  “Nay. Dar Dia! I have no wish for it to end. I care for her only s
he does not seem to hold me in the same light.”

  “What have ye been doing? Ye have had more than ample time to make your intentions known, and yet ye both seem as unsure of each other as the day ye wedded.”

  “I know it must look….” “Ye have no idea.”

  “It is worse, I fear.” Dougray sighed. “How so?”

  “Even though I do not wish to be parted from Aislinn, I must ask ye to let her go with ye.”

  “I don’t understand. Ye don’t want the marriage to end and yet ye want her to take up residence in my home. What is this ye ask of me, Fitzpatrick?” “Let me explain.”

  “I am listening.” He folded his arms against his chest.

  “I fear for Aislinn’s life.” Hennessy lost his stance for this was not what he had expected Dougray to say. “For some time now I have had threats made upon my person. I had thought that it was the Butlers, but now I do not think the clan responsible. There is someone else who wishes to harm me. It seems the threat has been extended to anyone who is close to me. There have been attempts on Aislinn’s life, outside the keep. But now I fear someone on the inside has tried to kill her…by poison. She was not well and I had originally thought it was from her confinement, then the miscarriage, but now I believe it was induced.”

  “Ye think someone was deliberately trying to poison her?”

  “Aye, but I have no proof other than my own suspicions. Before we came to my sister’s, Aislinn was a mere fragment of herself. She was lethargic to the point of exhaustion. She was unable to keep food down other than a broth that I had personally brought to her. In just a matter of few days, she has regained her appetite and her pallor has improved tenfold. I even see glimpses of her old stubborn self. I do not want anything to happen to her. Until I find out the person or persons behind this deliberate act, I cannot have her back at Dunhaven.”

  “I agree, but I insist that ye explain this to her. She is so unsure of ye.”

  “I cannot without frightening her. She needs to regain her strength. I also think that she would benefit from some time away from me. She seems to want this space and I will grant it to her.”