Putting Boys on the Ledge

by Stephanie Rowe

  There was no way I was ever going to put a guy on The Ledge. Ever! I was a total loser when it came to guys.

  Except I wasn't trying to get Colin's attention. Maybe my subconscious knew that, and would have behaved much more appropriately if it had been Heath I'd been talking to.

  Definitely. That was it. I wasn't hopeless. I would never be myself in front of a guy I wanted to impress. Just with guys I didn't. Phew! I still had a chance!

  "Blue? Are you in here?" Allie shouted from the driveway.

  Ah! My support team! "In here," I shouted. Colin looked at me in confusion, so I explained. "Those are my friends. They're coming for dinner tonight to help prepare for my rehearsal tomorrow."

  He nodded knowingly. "Need to pick your outfit, huh?"

  What? Did he have sisters or something? Or a serious girlfriend? And why did that second thought bum me out just a little bit?

  Allie swooshed around the corner, trailed by Natalie and Frances, all three of whom stopped instantly at the sight of Colin. "Helloooo," Allie crooned, giving him a delighted smile as she hopped up onto the counter by the sink and crossed her legs so you couldn't help but notice how short her skirt was. "And who might you be?"

  I almost laughed at Allie's obvious flirtation. Almost laughed, because a part of me wanted to ever-so-nicely tip her off the counter and into a wheelbarrow for looking at Colin like that. I mean, yes, I wasn't interested in him, but he was the first boy of note that I'd ever had a real conversation with, and I kinda felt like he should be off limits to Allie's flirtations. Which was silly, of course, right? So I helpfully pointed out each of my friends to him. "Colin, this is Allie, Frances, and Natalie. Guys, this is Colin. He's in charge of the barn while I'm at rehearsal."

  "Hey." Natalie plopped down on a hay bale and began chewing on a piece of straw, and Frances wandered over to the equine first aid books and began to leaf through one of them.

  "So what are we talking about?" Allie asked ultra-casually.

  Leave it to my friends to latch onto a boy. Any boy. I met him first. He was my boy to ignore. "We don't have time to chat," I explained. "Dinner is in a half hour."

  "Great. We'll all help with the chores." Natalie hopped up and grabbed the hose. "I'll water."

  "I'll check the chickens," Allie said.

  "And I'll make sure the goat hasn't eaten anything deadly today," Frances said.

  The three of them disappeared almost instantly, leaving me with Colin. Um, okay, so I guess Allie hadn't been making a move on him after all, seeing as how she took off so we could be alone. Which made me a little nervous, and a little excited. I could practice my "remembering how to speak coherently to a seventeen-year-old guy" skills on Colin. "So, I guess I'll show you how to feed everyone. And then clean the stalls?"

  "Sounds good."

  As I pulled open a feed bin, I thought about Colin's response to Heath. He hadn't actually admitted he knew or didn't know Heath. They were both seniors. The school wasn't that big. Maybe I could get some insight into Heath that would help me woo him. Woo. That word just made me laugh. "Do you go to Mapleville High?"

  "Yep." He leaned over my shoulder to watch how much I was scooping. I caught a whiff, and realized he smelled really good. Different than Heath; not as intense. But still really good.

  Heath, right. That's who I was supposed to be thinking about it. "So do you know Heath?"

  "I know who he is. Is that for the goat?"

  "Horses." I dumped a load of pellets into one of the buckets. "And?"

  "And what?" He watched as I scooped up some oats. "Which horse?"

  "The gray gets the pellets, the bay gets the sweet feed and oats." Was Colin being obtuse on purpose? How obvious did I have to make it that I was trying to get information on Heath? How was I supposed to be subtle if Colin refused to take the hint? "So, are you friends with Heath?"

  He snorted. "Not a chance."

  Why? Because Heath was too cool for him? But I didn't really think that was it. I didn't know Colin very well, but I was pretty sure that "no chance" had been more like "Dude, why on earth would I be friends with such a loser?" But that made no sense. Heath was definitely not a loser, and I was pretty sure Colin wasn't either. I mean, both guys were super cute and friendly. So, why did Colin sound like Heath should be shoved off a dock into a pond of duck poop? "Why aren't you friends?"

  "Because I have better things to do." Colin picked up the buckets and started walking toward the horse stalls.

  I hurried to catch up with him. "What's wrong with Heath?"

  Colin glanced at me. "Absolutely nothing. I'm sure he'd be perfect for you."

  "Absolutely nothing?" I didn't believe he really thought that. Why did Colin hate Heath? I almost asked him, but then I stopped myself.

  Why did I care what Colin thought? I had met Heath, and I knew he was awesome, so whatever issues Colin had with him were not my deal. I wasn't going to let Colin ruin my first true love.

  Heath was my focus. Sexy, gorgeous Heath who was going to be on stage with me, looking right at me, completely awed by my amazing acting skills and by the incredible sexy outfit Allie was going to put together for me.

  Phew. I was getting nervous for tomorrow night already.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  But the next day, everything fell apart minutes before rehearsal even began.

  Natalie's practice ran late. Allie was kept in detention after school, and didn't give Frances the makeup or the sexy clothes. I was stuck with my flat, lifeless hair, no make-up, my shapeless tee shirt and jeans, and only one friend to give me moral support.

  Any hope of sneaking in unnoticed and hiding out in the back row for the night was blown when I shuffled around the corner and saw Heath standing right in the doorway to the assembly hall, chatting with some other kids. There was no way for me to sneak in without him seeing me— sans makeup and wearing jeans that my mother would approve of.

  Maybe I could get lucky and he wouldn't notice me again. This time, that would make my day, not ruin it. I waited until one minute after five thirty, but he still hadn't gone inside and rehearsal was starting.

  I had to risk it.

  I fluffed my hair so it fell over my face, ducked my head, and leaped into the hallway to sprint past Heath into the assembly hall, moving so fast he wouldn't recognize me until I was long past him.

  Leap. Sprint. Run. Straight into Heath.

  Literally.

  Served me right for looking at the ground and not where I was going. I am a total idiot, a dork…who has Heath's hands on her shoulders.

  Oh, my gosh.

  His hands were on my shoulders. I dragged my gaze off my shoes and peeked at him, only to discover he was looking right at me, giving me all the attention and focus I'd wanted on Friday night at the football game. He was gazing into my eyes with tenderness and concern. I was certain I was going to melt right there, that instant, like overheated butter.

  "Whoa," he said. "Watch where you're going."

  "Sorry," I muttered, ducking my head again, hoping he wouldn't realize who I was.

  "Hey, it's you." He dropped his hands from my shoulders at that instant, in timing that was either a total coincidence, or evidence that he did not want to touch me now that he knew who I was.

  Fantastic. Of course he recognized me now. I met his gaze, and he was staring me in the face, no doubt wondering why my only makeup was a little bit of mascara and the remnants of the blush I put on this morning before school. Okay, so I was a fool not to bring my own makeup on the chance that Allie got in trouble and couldn't make it. She got detention at least twice a month. You'd think I'd have been prepared. But ever since I met Heath, my brain had stopped functioning.

  "What's your name? Blue?"

  "Yes." Well, at least he remembered my name. That had to mean something right? Maybe not that he'd been lying awake wondering when he was going to see me again, but at least he hadn't blocked me from his conscious mind, like I'd worried about after the infamous "Are you
talking to me?" incident at the game.

  "So what part did you get?" he asked.

  Okay, the boy was going to force me to engage in conversation, with complete disregard for my ugliness. I had two choices: pretend to become violently ill and run to the bathroom, or adopt the Attitude. Pretend I was hot, dressed in sexy lingerie that made Heath drool, and cop an attitude like I ruled the world.

  Like I had any idea how to do that.

  But for Heath, I'd give it a shot. Running to the bathroom to pretend to be sick probably wasn't the best way to attract a sexy senior. I flipped my hair out of my face, wondering if it reminded him of a model. Or did I remind him of a long-haired mutt that had just been running through a swamp?

  Although my usual level of self-esteem wanted to believe the "mutt" theory, the Attitude demanded I adopt the "model" philosophy. I was a goddess. Heath was my victim. I ruled the world. "Actually, Heath, I believe I got the role of your mother." I flashed my perfect post-braces smile and gave him a demure head tilt. "We might be spending a bit of time together."

  He nodded with approval. "Cool. I knew you were good when we read together."

  He knew I was good.

  Time to pass out.

  Then he narrowed his eyes and peered more carefully at me.

  What? Was I getting a zit? I instinctively ran my fingers over my chin but I didn't feel any bumps. What was he staring at?

  "Wait a sec," he said slowly, surprise dawning in his eyes. "You were the girl at the football game."

  Ah, yes. I could see the effort it was taking to connect Blue the Shlep with Hot Girl from the Game. "I was there, yes. My brother is on the team." Just so he didn't think I'd gone there to find him. Which I had. But there was certainly no need to admit that. Or was there? I couldn't remember how much to reveal. Flirt, but hold back. Argh! It was too complicated.

  "Sorry." Heath reached up and tucked my hair behind my ear. "I didn't recognize you."

  Oh.

  My.

  God.

  He touched me. On purpose. And not to keep me from falling down after running into him. He'd actually touched me.

  "So, you coming to the cast party Friday night?" he asked.

  "The cast party?" He touched me. He touched me. He touched me. I was never washing my hair again.

  "Yeah. It's the first cast party of the season," Heath said. "Got a pen?"

  Did I have a pen? Of course I had a pen. I dropped my backpack on the floor and pulled out a red pen and piece of paper. Heath took the pen, then grabbed my hand and wrote an address on the palm of my hand.

  Oh.

  My.

  God.

  "That's the address. Things kick off around seven." He touched my cheek. "Hope you can make it. You can bring friends, if you want."

  Even if I fell off The Ledge, lost my spleen, and got flattened by an eighteen-wheeler, there was no way I was going to miss that party.

  * * *

  The mall was packed for a Thursday night. Kids from school, parents shopping with their toddlers, and other random people. The food court was especially packed. A bunch of kids from my class were there, hanging out and eating. The delicious odor of greasy fries and burgers filled my nose. How lucky were they?

  The pizza dough smelled awesome! Why in the world would my mom have something against that kind of food? Wouldn't it be cool if I could eat out at the mall some nights instead of always having to do the family-dinner thing? Well, I could if I wanted to eat twice. Which was probably what I'd need to do once I started dating.

  I felt an elbow in my side, and realized Allie was talking to me. It was so hard to hear her with the piped-in music blasting from the food court and the shrieks of girls as they giggled with boys. It was only freshmen and sophomores at the mall. Juniors and seniors who could drive obviously had better things to do.

  Like Heath, who was at rehearsal, singing and dancing.

  And I was at the mall with other freshmen and sophomores, because the non-singing part of his mother had only about five minutes on stage, which meant I'd been invited to just the one rehearsal this week. Not exactly giving me repeated opportunities to convince Heath that he should love me.

  Which is what the cast party tomorrow night was for.

  Wooing Heath.

  Wooing required preparation, and the Attitude. Which was why Allie had dragged us to the mall for some Thursday night shopping.

  "Hey!" Allie nudged me again. "Are you listening to me?"

  "Sorry." I tucked Heath to the back of my brain and paid attention to my friends. "What's up?"

  "I was trying to get clarification," Allie said. "Even without makeup or proper clothes, he invited you to the party?"

  "Yep." He had, hadn't he? That was pretty cool.

  "Well, I'm impressed. The Attitude must have been in fine form."

  "I don't even know what the Attitude is," I said, stopping outside the lingerie store. "You really think this is necessary?"

  Frances and Natalie bumped into me, giggling. No doubt they'd noticed one of the many cute boys in the mall, all of whom were going to see us walking into this lingerie store. Why did it have to be right smack in the middle of the mall, so close to the food court? Anyone could see us.

  "Louisa always wears sexy underwear on dates, even if she has no intention of letting the boy see them. It helps fuel the Attitude," Allie explained. "I know you don't want to borrow her underwear, so you've got to buy some of your own."

  "I have bikini underwear. What's wrong with that?" Heath definitely wasn't going to be seeing it anytime soon, no matter how nice he was at the party.

  "No. Not bikini." Allie walked into the store and flung a lofty look over her shoulder at us. "Thong."

  I didn't follow her into the store. "Thong? Like, the up-your-butt stuff?"

  Natalie and Frances giggled and hurried after Allie, so I had no choice but to hurry after them and pray that no one from school saw me.

  "A thong is the only way to go." Allie led the way across the store as if she'd been there plenty of times before.

  Which she probably had, come to think about it.

  Allie stopped in front of a table that was covered in brightly colored scraps of shiny silk. "Here you go. Pick one."

  I grabbed a black one with red lace and held it up in the air. One little piece of fabric in the front, with strands around the hips and up the butt. "You've got to be kidding."

  "Nope. They're great. Much more comfortable than you'd think."

  Natalie picked one up and examined it, her nose wrinkled ever so slightly.

  Frances just gazed at the table and tried to look disapproving.

  "Oh, come on, Frances." I threw a leopard-print thong at her. "You know you want one."

  She grinned and caught it. "I want a red one."

  Allie whistled. "Aha, the true Frances emerges! Passion red." She held up a red velvet one. "Like this?"

  Frances plucked it from Allie's hand and rubbed the material between her fingers. "Very nice."

  "I bet Theo's dates all wear thongs," I said. Sure enough, that same tinge of pink flushed Frances' cheeks at the mention of Theo. She was definitely crushing on him! I glanced at Allie and Natalie, but they were too busy rifling through the thongs to notice.

  This Frances/Theo situation was definitely going to have to be addressed because he was bad news for the girls he dated. No way could Frances become one of his conquests.

  "So, Blue, which one are you going to get?" Allie asked.

  "Um..." I looked back down at the table, and an emerald green silk thong caught my eye. I picked it up and inspected it. Delicate lace on the front, a deep green that was like jade in the sunlight. Gorgeous. And absolutely ridiculously sexy. I could never wear it. And I certainly could never buy it. "I'll take this one."

  Or maybe I could.

  Allie and Natalie each picked one too, and Allie bought one for Frances, who refused to buy one for herself.

  When the saleswoman handed me my bag, I
felt like it was burning my fingers. A thong! I owned a thong! Lacy, shiny, and so sexy. I'd feel like I was eighteen if I ever got up the courage to wear it! Old enough to date Heath, no doubt.

  While the gals paid I walked to the doorway, swinging the bag between my fingers, wondering if anyone walking by would realize I'd just become a sexy diva. Can you imagine if they knew what was in there?

  I'd pass out and die right on the spot.

  "Blue?" Colin's deep voice echoed over the crowd, and I jumped a mile.

  This couldn't be happening! I was standing in the doorway of a lingerie store with a thong burning its way through my shopping bag. No way was I going to acknowledge my name. I turned to my left and started walking down the mall...right into Colin, who was walking toward me waving.

  Okay. Total embarrassment. What was up with the fact that I kept crashing into the guys I was trying to hide from? Seriously!

  "Hi, Blue." Colin caught up to me, glancing behind me into the store. Then he grinned that annoying male grin. "Going shopping?"

  Oh, God, total mortification time. "Um...no. Just hanging out with my friends."

  He pointed to my shopping bag.

  Darn it. It was no good to lie when evidence was in such abundance. "I… Um… you know…"

  Glory be—before I had to come up with something coherent, an eight-year-old girl came rushing up to us and grabbed Colin's hand. "They have ice cream. Can we get ice cream?"

  "Sure." Colin glanced at me. "My little sister."

  He didn't even seem embarrassed to be caught hanging out with his little sister on a Thursday night at the mall. Unlike me, who would have been quite thrilled to crawl under a rock and die at that very moment—because of the thong, not because of my sister. Oh, how I'd rather be caught here with Marissa than with a thong.

  "Oh, hi, Colin." Allie appeared next to me, while Frances and Natalie wandered into my peripheral vision on the other side. "All done mucking stalls already?"

  "Yep. I had a good teacher." He grinned at me, a really nice smile that eased my embarrassment, but before I could start to really enjoy the moment, his sister yanked on his arm.