The Wannabes

by Tammy Coons

  Stella stuck her head into the room. “What’s up?”

  Please don’t fill her in. Corbin silently pleaded.

  “Rob seems to think I’m macking on Corbin.” Ryder chuckled and gave Corbin a small wink. Stella joined in on his laughter.

  “You and Corbin? That would be like me and Nick Jonas getting together.” This time Alex joined in.

  “Can everyone please get out of my room?” Corbin blew her nose again. Alex patted Corbin’s leg then walked to the door.

  “Just trying to make you laugh, but from my life experiences, when a guy starts blaming you on cheating it is actually the guy who is doing it.”

  “Thanks Stella, that makes me feel so much better.” Corbin shook her head. Stella shrugged then disappeared from her sight. After another glance her way, Ryder shut the door.

  She picked up her phone and tried to call Rob but it went straight to voicemail. Tears stung in her eyes. She lay back on the bed, grabbed a pillow and hugged it tightly against her. Never in her life had ever felt so alone.

  RYDER PULLED THE leftover taco stuff from the fridge. “I am going to warm up the taco shit, you want some?” he yelled from the kitchen.

  “No,” both Alex and Stella said in unison. . He turned back to the counter, finding it hard to think about anything other than the taste of Corbin and the sounds of her moans and the way her mouth moved when she spoke French. He felt his pants tug. Looking around he readjusted himself.

  “I would love to find out if Rob is cheating on her,” Alex said as she entered the kitchen.

  “He probably is. Corbin said they haven’t had sex for a couple weeks.” Stella leaned against the counter next to Ryder. He gave her a casual sideways glance then continued assembling his food. She in turn gave him a wink. His thoughts went back to Corbin, the look on her face as she clawed at his belt. A low involuntary growl erupted from him.

  “Are you really that hungry?” Alex asked through a yawn. Ryder bit his bottom lip in an attempt to contain laughter.

  “What do you think, Ryder?” Stella asked. She twirled her hair around her finger.

  “About what?” Ryder shrugged. He put his tacos in the microwave.

  “Rob and the cheating…duh?”

  “Why are you asking him? He hasn’t ever been in a relationship that lasted more than 24 hours,” Alex said.

  “Ouch…” Ryder pretended to stab himself in the chest.

  “It’s true, Casanova.”

  “I beg to differ. I know there was at least one time that I can remember that lasted 48 hours.”

  “Yeah right.” Alex rolled her eyes.

  “Seriously, they were twins. I had one on Friday, and the other on Saturday.” Ryder clicked his tongue and gave Alex a wink.

  “You are such a pig,” Alex sighed.

  CORBIN DROVE HER car down a long winding lane. In front of her appeared a hulking Victorian house. As she got closer she could see a wraparound porch and old tattered screen doors. She parked her car and made her way up the rickety wooden stairs and knocked on the door.

  “Hello?” she called out. When no one answered she entered the house. Once inside, she admired the antique furniture and old pictures that were strewn about the walls. Venturing further she found herself at the bottom of a staircase. As she walked up they split into two different sides of the house.

  “Hello, is anyone home?” She gingerly crept up the stairs. Her heart was thumping in her chest, her breathing labored. She stopped in front of an ornately decorated door. Reaching out she turned the doorknob and pushed the door open. The door creaked and goose bumps formed all over her body. Inside was a woman lying on the bed.

  “I’m… sorry to intrude,” Corbin stammered her mouth was as dry as cotton. As she neared the woman she saw that it was her mom. She was dressed in white and her arms were crossed over her chest. Corbin reached out and touched her hands. As soon as she touched her, her eyes shot open. She sat straight up in bed, and slowly turned her head to face her.

  “Why did you do this to me?” her Mom screamed. “You’re killing me!” She watched as her mom’s mouth opened so wide that it starting cracking open. A loud screech erupted from her. Her mom wrapped her hands around Corbin’s neck. It was as if Corbin was frozen in her spot.

  “Wake up!” a male voice off in the distance spoke.

  “Wake up! Breathe!” Something was shaking her.

  Her mom’s hands tightened.

  “Someone call 911!” At that moment, Corbin felt something cold splash over her.

  She opened her eyes and took in a long rasping breath.

  “Jesus Christ!” Stella said in a hushed tone. Corbin gasped for air, her lungs stinging.

  “You were turning blue!” Alex rushed to her.

  “Should we call an ambulance?” Ryder asked.

  Corbin sat up and took in a few more deep breaths. She shook her head then eased back onto the pillow.

  “It was just a nightmare.”

  “It must have been a doozie.”

  “You scared the hell out of us.” Stella turned and left her room.

  “Sorry, can someone get me some water?” She wiped her eyes with her shirt sleeve.

  “You’re shaking.” Ryder sat on the edge of her bed and took her hand in his.

  “You would be too if you dreamt that your mom was strangling you.” He reached out with is free hand and swiped some damp hair out of her eyes.

  “You’re safe now,” he said softly. Corbin met his eyes. She believed his words; he did make her feel safe. He gave her a small smile then stood. Alex whizzed into the room.

  “I got you some Aleve, too.” Alex handed her a glass of water and the pills.

  “Thanks.” Corbin popped the pills in her mouth and sipped the water. She threw the blankets back. “I am soaked. Whose idea was it to dump cold water on me?”

  “I wasn’t going to give you mouth to mouth.” Stella trudged back into the bedroom hands ion her hips.

  “That’s probably a good thing. Who knows what your mouth was doing last night.” Alex ran her hands through her hair. Ryder giggled then left the room, shaking his head as he went.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?” Stella huffed and then flipped Alex off.

  “Not really.’”Alex turned to Corbin, “If you don’t need anything else. I really need to get some sleep.”

  “I’m fine.” Alex threw her arms in the air and stormed out of the room. Corbin rolled her eyes then began tearing apart her bed. The nightmare was a regular one especially when major trauma happened in her life. She thought back to the first day she left her mom at the nursing home. Her mom had cried and begged her not to leave her there. Corbin still felt as much guilt today as she had that day. Once back in her car she had called Rob, but he was too busy to talk to her. He had told her to put on her big girl panties and deal. Her brothers had told her pretty much the same. She rubbed her eyes in an attempt to hold the tears in. She gathered up some dry clothes, deciding a hot shower would help ease some of her issues. She made sure to grab a couple of towels from the hallway closet. She took a long hot shower then slathered herself with a bunch of lotion. As brushed her teeth she heard the water turn on in the kitchen, and a low hum. She moved closer to the door and Ryder’s raspy voice rang out.

  “Everybody yeah, rock your body yeah, everybody yeah. Rock your body right. Backstreets back alright!” Corbin covered her mouth but was unable to contain a laugh. Toothpaste flew from her mouth and she erupted into a fit of laughter.

  “You don’t like my singing?” Corbin cracked open the door. “How about this one?” He began singing Ice, Ice, Baby and performed the running man dance. He wiggled his eyebrows and began laughing, too. Corbin sank to the floor, waves of laughter socked her. She even snorted a couple of times. She leaned back against a cupboard door. Ryder sat down next to her.

  “You have a little something on your face.” Ryder pointed to his own face as to show her where it was. Corbin wiped her chin then took so
me deep breaths but the laughter ensued.

  “For the love of all that is holy, could you two please shut up?” Alex yelled. She slammed her bedroom door shut. Corbin covered her mouth to stifle the laughs.

  “Thanks, I needed that,” Corbin whispered between giggles. Ryder stood and held out his hand. She took it and he helped her off the floor.

  “Anytime.” He kept her hand in his. They stood silent in the kitchen and gazed at one another.

  “Hey, does anyone know where my iPod is?” Stella blurted. Ryder dropped her hand and moved to the sink. Corbin tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and after one more glance Ryder’s way she left the room. In the living room Stella was frantically digging through the couch.

  “Tada!” She held up her iPod then went back into her bedroom. Corbin grabbed her keys, wallet and laundry basket. Her brain was reeling with all of the happenings in the last 24 hours. She silently bitched herself out and then proceeded to her car.

  At the laundry mat she got all of her laundry going then drove to Royce’s to pick up a few things. She kept to herself throughout the store. As she started down the frozen food aisle she saw Ryder, his cart was full of groceries. He was leaning against one of the freezer doors, two of Corbin’s coworkers were talking with him. Not wanting anymore confrontations with him, she quickly turned around and ran her cart into a lady behind her.

  “Shit, I mean sorry,” Corbin stammered.

  “Hmph…” The lady threw her nose in the air and rushed away. Corbin sighed and began walking away.

  “Great minds think alike,” Ryder said from behind her. She turned slowly. Her heart was pounding in her chest. Even his voice turned her on.

  “Yeah,”

  “Do you guys have a grill?” Corbin shook her head. It was as if her mouth and brain couldn’t form sentences. “Crap, I really wanted some steak tonight.”

  “We…we usually borrow our neighbors.” Corbin cleared her throat.

  Good, Corbin keep talking, she coached herself.

  “Awesome, I am going to go checkout. See you at the apartment.” Ryder shot her a killer smile and gave her a wink. Corbin watched him walk away, an involuntary shiver ran down her spine and the ache between her legs started up again. She bit her lip to contain a moan. She finished her shopping, stopped at the laundry mat and drove home.

  After the steak dinner, Corbin’s roommates left for Rebels. They had tried to get her to go with them but she refused. She just wanted to be alone and try to clear her head. She settled in with a book but found it very hard to concentrate. After a few hours of staring at the same page, she closed the book then closed her eyes. She hoped for a nightmare-free night.

  THE SOUND OF Corbin’s alarm woke her. She stretched and then shut it off. She yawned, then grabbed for her glasses and cell phone. She checked for missed calls and messages, but there was none. She closed her eyes again and momentarily considered staying in bed all day. But today was the day she spent with her mom. She threw back the blankets, grabbed some clothes and headed to the bathroom. As she walked through the living room she saw Ryder stretched out on the couch. He was sound asleep, shirtless. A sheet covered his lower half. She walked closer to him and held her clothes tight to her chest. She watched as his chest rose and fell with every breath he took. Without a second thought, she ran her fingers over the tattoo of the grim reaper that resided on his chest. Ryder stirred a little under her hand. Feeling bold, she ran her fingers down the middle of his chest and stopped short at the top of the sheet.

  “Mmmm…” Ryder mumbled. Corbin snapped her hand away and hurried into the bathroom. She looked at her reflection.

  How could she want Ryder so much if she was supposed to be in love with Rob?

  “Try to figure out the answer to that one, Corbin,” she said aloud. After her shower, she crept through the living room willing herself not to look in Ryder’s direction. She grabbed her keys and purse from the table by the door and then shut the door as quietly as possible.

  She drove to the nursing home and sat in her car for a few minutes to gather her senses. She took a couple cleansing breaths and then made her way inside of the home. It was breakfast time so all of the residents were sitting at their tables.

  “Good morning, Corbin,” Deb, one of the CNAs said. Corbin gave her a wave. Deb was her absolute favorite person who worked at the home. She was bubbly and always had a smile on her face. And the fact that she was always so patient with her mom also made her to the top of Corbin’s list.

  “Where’s mom?’ Corbin asked sitting down.

  “She didn’t want to come out for breakfast today.” Corbin nodded. It wasn’t the first time. Lately her Mom had been becoming more and more reclusive.

  “Did someone take her a tray?”

  “Yep, Laurie is in there with her.”

  “Ok thanks.”Corbin stood and walked to her mom’s room. She stood outside of the door.

  “Mary, you need to eat,” Laurie said from inside.

  “I don’t have to do anything,” her mom replied. “I don’t know what I did to be put into prison.”

  “Mary, you’re not in prison. You’re at Friendship Manor.”

  “Bullshit,” her mom grumbled.

  Corbin took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

  “Come in,” Laurie called. Corbin plastered on a smile.

  “Good morning, Mom.” She watched her Mom look her up and down, the vacant look in her eyes saddened Corbin. “How are you today?” Corbin crouched down next to her.

  “I would be better if someone would tell me why I am in prison.”

  “Mom, you’re not in prison.” Corbin placed her hand over hers. Her mom yanked hers away.

  “Don’t touch me, I don’t know who you are.” Corbin’s heart seized in her chest, she swallowed back some tears.

  “It’s me, Mom. Corbin, your daughter.” She searched her mom’s face for some kind of recognition.

  “I don’t have any children.” Corbin looked to Laurie who shrugged and mouthed the words I’m sorry. Corbin looked to the floor then stood.

  “It is a beautiful morning. Do you want to go for a walk?” Corbin wiped her eyes. Laurie walked to her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

  “No.”

  “How about doing a puzzle together? You like that.”

  “For the last time, I don’t know you! Warden, will you please get this person out of my cell?” her mom shouted. Corbin felt as if a knife had been shoved in her chest. She found it hard to breath.

  “I’ll go, Mom, I will see you next week. I love you.” Corbin walked back into the hallway. She placed a hand over her eyes and tried to maintain control. She leaned her back against the wall.

  “Corbin, are you ok?” Deb asked. She was wheeling a resident down the hall.

  “She’s getting worse. I don’t know if I can keep coming to see her.”

  “Don’t give up on her. It isn’t her fault.”

  “I know, it just sucks. She used to be so vibrant and loving.”

  “Keep that Mary in your mind.” Deb gave her a wink and went on about her job. Corbin pushed off the wall and with a heavy heart left the nursing home. Her world was crashing around her. The two people she had loved more than life itself despised her. When she got to her car, she kicked the driver’s door. Everything was her fault, her life sucked and she had made it that way.

  RYDER TOOK A quick shower then began scavenging the kitchen for food. He dug out the bacon and eggs and began preparing breakfast. He heard the door open and shut. Peeking from the kitchen he saw Corbin walking through. She looked as if she had been crying.

  “I am making some bacon and eggs. Do you want some?”

  Corbin didn’t answer him. She went into her bedroom and shut the door. Ryder shrugged, thinking she was probably still upset from the Rob episode, and then continued with making his food. As he was cooking he found himself humming the tune to Lips of an Angel. He felt arms wrap around his waist and kisses on his back. Corbin,
he thought to himself. He turned a planted his sly smile on his face, Stella stared up at him.

  “Why don’t you come to my room and sing to me,” she purred. He stared up at the ceiling then slowly pushed her hands away. He took her hands in his.

  “Stella, you are a great girl but I am just not interested in you like that.” He watched a frown appear on her face. A year earlier he would have jumped at the chance to hit the sack with her. She yanked her hands away from his.

  “You are such a tease.” She crossed her arms.

  Ryder chuckled. “Why am I a tease?”

  “You are always flirting with me. I mean last night we danced and talked. I told you personal stuff.”

  “It’s just my nature, I guess. I didn’t mean to throw mixed signals at you.” In the back of his mind he replayed the night. The band was mediocre, and he was warned numerous times to stay away from the Muscello chicks. Stella was sloshed off her ass and kept groping him and clinging to him.

  “Just your nature, huh? You are a bastard.” A flash of anger went through him.

  “If you want the truth, Stella, you were the one who was flirting or should I say practically raping me. I had to pull your hands from my pants multiple times.” Ryder couldn’t believe he was complaining about that. He felt like such a girl.

  “No I didn’t,” Stella huffed.

  “Ah, yes you did. You got down on your knees and begged to give me head, in front of a group of people at the bar.” He gestured to his crotch.

  “Fuck you.” Stella flipped him off.

  “No thanks.” Ryder turned away and mixed his eggs. He heard a door slam shut. He threw the whisk into the sink.

  Living with three chicks is going to put me in an early grave, he thought to himself.

  “Fuck!” he shouted. He grabbed his shirt and stormed out of the apartment. He stomped down the stairs and then sat on the bottom one. He lit a cigarette and rubbed his forehead. His thoughts drifted back to the day before his accident. His band was well on their way to getting a contract. He remembered the excitement he felt as he sat in the label’s office and talked about their music, his songs. They were so close, and then he messed up the whole deal by going on a bender of coke and hard liquor. His band mates begged him not to get on his motorcycle. The next thing he remembered was waking up in a hospital. His band broke up and his bike destroyed.