Ice Dreams

by Jo Cotterill

  Zac raised his eyebrows. ‘Are you telling me to work hard?’

  Tania hesitated. ‘It probably sounds rude to you. You’re not as ambitious as I am. People expect a lot from me. If I’m doing a pairs programme, it’s got to be good. Really good. And that means practising every day, sometimes twice a day. I can’t work with someone who isn’t committed.’

  Zac met her gaze levelly. ‘I’ll match whatever you put in,’ he said, and although his voice was low, it had the ring of conviction about it.

  Tania nodded, and turned to put her skate guards on.

  ‘One minute,’ said Zac. Tania paused. Zac was staring down at her. ‘You’ve got to be committed too,’ he said. ‘I don’t mean putting in the hours, anyone can do that. I know this isn’t what you wanted. You think this is going to hold up your career. Well, I don’t know anything about that, but I do know I don’t want to skate with someone who’d prefer to be off skating on their own. If we’re going to work together, you’ve got to give me a proper chance.’

  Tania looked at him for a moment, at the straight nose and the steady eyes, and she nodded. ‘Deal.’

  Chapter 5

  Aren’t you afraid of anything?

  ‘SO,’ SAID LIBBY, ‘how did it go? Did you put your foot down?’

  Tania smiled ruefully. ‘Yes. And then Brock stamped on it.’

  Libby’s eyes opened wide. ‘No! He really stamped on your foot? With a skate? Oh my God!’

  Tania laughed. ‘You idiot, Lib. Of course he didn’t really stamp on my foot. You are so literal.’

  ‘Thank God!’ Libby wiped imaginary sweat from her brow. ‘For a minute there I was imagining your foot sliced in half.’

  ‘Ew.’

  ‘Well, exactly. So what happened then?’ Libby threw her bag onto the floor next to the table and pulled a squashed sandwich out of her pocket. ‘Oh no, Mum made me cheese salad again. I told her not to put tomatoes in, they just make everything else soggy.’

  ‘You should make your own lunch then,’ said Tania primly, producing a small lunchbox.

  ‘You can talk! When have you ever made your own packed lunch?’ commented Libby. ‘Your mum still makes yours too.’

  ‘Only because I get up so early to go to the rink,’ said Tania. ‘She says if I made my own lunch in the mornings we’d never get there for six a.m.’

  Libby lost interest in Tania’s mum. ‘Never mind that, what about the training? What about …’ she lowered her voice, ‘Zac?’

  Tania bit into her sandwich and thought back to the previous afternoon. ‘It didn’t start very well. I was a bit mad, to tell you the truth. Maybe I went a bit over the top.’

  ‘You? Never,’ said Libby loyally, and then ruined the effect by snorting with laughter. ‘I can’t think of a single time you’ve ever gone over the top before … oh wait, except that time you found out Mrs Lafayette had timetabled your French Oral at the same time as your last NISA test … and then the time your skates weren’t ready when they said they would be and you just went mad because you wanted to practise that evening … and then there were the other fifty-three times …’

  ‘Anyway,’ went on Tania, ignoring Libby’s malicious giggle, ‘we only did a bit of practice but it was all right. Not amazing, but not as bad as I thought it was going to be.’ She hesitated. ‘Do I really go over the top that much?’

  ‘Yes,’ said Libby affectionately, ‘but I still like you. Can’t think why.’

  Tania pulled a face. ‘I can’t think why either.’

  Libby laughed. ‘Oh, Tania! You are so serious sometimes! Maybe that’s why we make such good friends. You’re too serious and I’m not serious enough!’

  ‘We are complete opposites, aren’t we?’ asked Tania with a rueful smile.

  ‘Just as well too,’ said Libby, picking slices of tomato out of her sandwich and piling them on the table. ‘I couldn’t be friends with someone exactly like me. I mean, what would we talk about? Except boys, of course.’

  Tania watched her friend make a pile of soggy tomatoes. ‘That’s disgusting, Lib.’

  ‘Speaking of boys,’ went on Libby, ‘what’s he like? Zac.’

  ‘He’s all right. Not as rude as I thought.’

  ‘Aha!’ Libby waggled her eyebrows. ‘I knew it! Romance blossoms on the ice.’

  Tania shook her head in amusement. ‘You have such a one-track mind. It’s not like that at all. He’s not even my type. He’s far too laid-back for me. I’m really driven; ambitious. He’s not like that at all.’

  ‘Uh-huh.’

  ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

  ‘What colour are his eyes?’ asked Libby.

  ‘Hazel,’ said Tania automatically.

  ‘HA!’

  ‘What?’

  Libby leaned forward and waved a slice of tomato at her friend. ‘You’ve noticed his eyes! That can mean only one thing …’

  ‘They’re either side of his nose?’ suggested Tania.

  ‘You fancy him!’ announced Libby dramatically.

  ‘I do not!’ said Tania. ‘Lib, honestly, it’s just skating. It’s only for a couple of months; just till the show. That’s all.’

  ‘Hmm,’ said Libby. ‘That’s what you say.’

  Tania laughed. ‘Even if I did feel like that, Zac wouldn’t look at me twice. We’re from different worlds. Besides, he knows singles is my career. He’s just in it for the fun. He’s so laid-back, he’ll probably forget all about practice today anyway.’

  Libby made a face. ‘Say what you like,’ she said loftily, the effect slightly spoilt by the dab of mayonnaise on her nose. ‘This is the beginning of a beautiful relationship. I just know it.’

  As Tania got out of the car for the afternoon practice, she suddenly remembered what she’d said earlier to Libby. Would Zac have forgotten about practice today? Would he have changed his mind? As she waved to Michael on the ticket desk and pushed open the big double doors, she felt momentarily flustered. If Zac had decided not to come … how would she feel about that? Would she be pleased? Or would she …

  Tania drew in a sharp breath. Not only was Zac here, but he was already on the ice. She could tell it was him by the short blond hair and the battered boots. He was in a sit spin, and she watched for a moment as he spun round and round, trying to get into as tight a position as possible. Coming out of the spin, he stopped for a moment, as though dazed, and ran his fingers through his hair so that the little spikes stuck out at all angles. Then, to Tania’s amazement, Zac skated back to the patch of ice where he had started spinning and gazed intently downwards. He’s looking at his tracings, Tania thought with some shock. She’d never seen him do that before.

  As if alerted by some sixth sense, Zac suddenly looked up. Tania felt her cheeks redden at being caught watching, but Zac waved cheerfully at her. ‘Only travelled three feet this time!’ he yelled up, oblivious to the other people on and around the rink. ‘Better than yesterday!’

  Tania felt her mouth creep up into a grin. Zac obviously didn’t bear her any ill will after her outburst. Others were looking curiously at her, but she was too embarrassed to yell back, so instead she went quickly down the stairs to the changing rooms. Ten minutes later and she was suitably attired for the rink, though she still had some stretching to do.

  Zac joined her rink side, as Tania bent forward over her knee. ‘Thought you might not come,’ he said with a grin.

  ‘I thought you might not either,’ retorted Tania.

  Zac tilted his head on one side. ‘I did think about it,’ he said. ‘I wasn’t sure I liked the idea of working with a Chelsea skater.’

  ‘Oh, I knew you’d say that at some point!’ exclaimed Tania. ‘I am not a Chelsea skater!’

  Zac laughed. ‘Boy, you’re easy to wind up. Do you have to take everything so seriously?’

  Before Tania could answer, Zac had leaped onto the ice – backwards. ‘Hey,’ he called. ‘I’ve been working on this step sequence, what do you think?’

  T
ania placed her right foot on the barrier and stretched out as she watched Zac perform a complicated sequence that looked like a cross between salsa dancing and jumping over hot coals. Unfortunately, he tripped over his own toe-pick as he reached the end of the rink, and crashed into the barrier, narrowly avoiding another skater, who glared at him. Tania stifled a snort.

  ‘I’m all right!’ Zac yelled. ‘It wasn’t meant to be quite like that.’

  ‘I should think not,’ came Brock’s voice from Tania’s left. She blushed, unsure how he would be with her after yesterday.

  ‘Hi, Brock.’

  ‘Hi, Tania. You ready for some hard work?’

  Tania slipped off her guards and stood up straight. ‘Always.’

  ‘Good.’ Brock nodded at her and gave her a brief smile. ‘Then let’s get started.’

  Brock made Tania and Zac skate in straight lines from one end of the rink to the other, trying to match their skating strokes. ‘Left … right … left … right,’ he called. ‘Stop. Now do it coming back the other way, but without me counting. And don’t look at each other!’

  It was extremely difficult. Not only did Tania have to watch Zac out of the corner of her eye, but she also had to make sure she wasn’t about to bump into any of the other four skaters on the ice. ‘You’ve got to be able to sense what the other person is doing,’ said Brock. ‘You have to know where they are, which edge they’re on, without looking. And you have to know their dimensions too. It’s like getting a new car. You have to learn the width, how the brakes handle, the speed of acceleration. You have to adapt your driving style to the new car.’

  Zac glanced at Tania. ‘I think Tania is a later model than I am,’ he said. ‘And has better road handling.’

  ‘But you have sharper brakes,’ grinned Tania, remembering Zac’s abrupt hockey stops.

  ‘Enough,’ said Brock. ‘Do it again.’

  After they had been up and down the rink countless times, Brock allowed the two of them to skate round hand in hand a few times. ‘You’re not trying to do what the other person does,’ he said. ‘You’re trying to find the common ground – the halfway between the two of you. Better.’

  Slowly, Tania found she was becoming more aware of Zac’s skating style. It was different to hers – longer strides because of his longer legs, and a tendency to lean forward to increase speed – but she had to admit there was something rather exciting about trying to skate with him, almost as though they were one person with two sets of skates.

  There were only a few people around today, mostly parents and rink staff, but Tania could see most of them were watching curiously, and she suddenly wondered how she and Zac looked as a pair. Were the spectators secretly amused by this strange partnership? Did they see it as a step down for her, the girl who’d always skated solo? You shouldn’t care what they think, she told herself sternly. You’re not doing it for them.

  ‘Good,’ said Brock. ‘And now close your eyes, Tania.’

  Tania blinked. ‘What?’

  ‘Close your eyes,’ ordered Brock. ‘Zac will navigate you around the rink.’

  Tania shot a quick look at Zac. He looked surprised, but as he caught her eye, he smiled reassuringly. ‘Hey, no problem. I’ve got a good sense of direction. Never driven a Porsche, obviously, but …’

  Tania laughed nervously and closed her eyes. Her hand tightened in Zac’s, and gradually he began to lead her across the ice.

  ‘Keep them closed!’ called Brock from the side. ‘No peeking!’

  Tania felt very unnerved. ‘I don’t like this,’ she muttered to Zac as he tugged on her hand. ‘It’s weird.’

  ‘You’re doing fine,’ came Zac’s voice. ‘Besides, you’ve been around this rink a thousand times before, haven’t you? I bet you could do it yourself with your eyes shut.’

  ‘That’s different,’ said Tania, and wobbled slightly. She set her jaw. ‘I would still be in control.’

  ‘Relax!’ shouted Brock.

  Tania heard Zac laugh. ‘I don’t think ordering her to relax is going to work,’ he called back.

  Tania felt annoyed. ‘I can relax,’ she said shortly. Staring fiercely into the blackness, she imagined the ice melting into a huge hole in front of her. And one more step and she’d be falling into it … falling …

  ‘Um, that’s not relaxing,’ said Zac. ‘Your grip just got tighter.’

  Tania opened her eyes and drew to a stop. ‘I’m sorry. I’m not sure I can do this.’

  ‘It’s OK,’ said Zac. ‘It’ll take time.’

  ‘You haven’t got time,’ said Brock as they skated over to him. ‘You’ve got three months. To learn how to skate together, get a programme together and polish it to performance standard. So do it again, only Zac, you close your eyes this time.’

  Zac grinned, obediently closed his eyes and held out his hands. Tania gently led him around the rink and was astonished to find Zac simply followed her. Even when she led him into the barrier by mistake.

  ‘Oof!’ said Zac as he folded over the top of the barrier, the wind knocked out of him.

  ‘Oh my God!’ cried Tania. ‘I’m so sorry! Are you all right? I just didn’t … I mean …’

  ‘I’m fine,’ said Zac, breathing heavily. He grinned at her again. ‘So you haven’t got much of a sense of direction then.’

  Tania flushed. ‘I just left it too late to turn.’

  ‘I know,’ said Zac. ‘I was pulling your leg.’

  ‘Are you really OK?’

  Zac patted his stomach. ‘Solid as a rock, these muscles are,’ he said, and spoiled the effect by wincing.

  Tania felt her mouth twitch. ‘Yeah, looks like it.’ How can he take it all so calmly? she wondered.

  ‘What is this, a date?’ yelled Brock. ‘Get on with the skating!’

  Zac straightened up. ‘Ready to go again?’ he said, and held out his hand.

  ‘You’ll still let me lead you?’ said Tania in astonishment. ‘But I just crashed you into the barrier!’

  Zac shrugged. ‘I’m sure you’ll try not to this time.’

  Tania took his hand, and Zac closed his eyes. As she led him around the rink, Tania marvelled on Zac’s lack of fear. He’d just had a nasty crash. She wouldn’t have blamed him if he’d said he’d had enough. After all, it was her fault – she wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d been angry with her. But instead, he just dusted himself off and said, ‘Let’s go again.’ Didn’t he mind having accidents and falls? Didn’t they make him nervous?

  As they stepped off the ice at the end of the session, Tania plucked up the courage to ask. ‘Um …’ she said. ‘Look, I don’t know how to say this, but – aren’t you afraid of hurting yourself, out there on the ice?’

  Zac looked surprised. ‘Hurting myself?’ he repeated, a puzzled frown between his brows. ‘No, I don’t think I am. What’s the point in worrying about something like that? If I thought I might hurt myself, I’d never cross the road, or go down stairs, let alone try a triple salchow. Why?’

  Tania shook her head hastily. ‘Oh, no reason.’

  Zac threw her a curious glance, but Tania was putting on her skate guards and heading to the lockers. He shrugged and sat down to unlace his boots where he was.

  Brock joined him on the bench. ‘It’s about time you got some decent boots, Zac,’ he said, ‘especially if you’re going to be practising more often. Those ones are starting to break down.’

  ‘Nah,’ said Zac. ‘They’ll last a bit longer. Besides, I’m fond of the old things.’ He ran a finger along one blade to remove the chips of ice. ‘I’ll sharpen them though. They’re not cornering as well as they used to.’

  ‘You should get a professional to do that,’ said Brock. ‘They’ll do a better job than you can.’

  Zac pretended to look offended. ‘What are you saying about my sharpening skills?’

  ‘I’m saying they’re not good enough if you want to partner Tania,’ said Brock. ‘Get it sorted, Zac. And get some new boots. Otherwise you�
��ll never keep up with her.’ He patted Zac on the back and stood up. ‘Good work today.’

  ‘Thanks,’ said Zac. He unlaced his second boot and looked up. Brock had disappeared into the staff corridor. Zac’s usually cheerful face looked worried.

  Chapter 6

  Haven’t you done enough?

  ‘YOU’RE ON THE wrong edge,’ Tania observed. ‘That’s why you’re not taking off cleanly.’

  ‘I’m on my inside edge,’ said Zac.

  ‘No, you’re not. Look, this is what you did.’ She demonstrated. ‘See? At the last minute you cheated it.’

  Zac shook his head. ‘No, this is what I did.’ He repeated the jump.

  ‘Exactly!’ said Tania. ‘You did it again!’

  ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Zac appealed to Brock. ‘I wasn’t on my outside edge, was I?’

  ‘Yes you were,’ said Brock bluntly. ‘Tania’s right.’

  Zac bit his lip and looked at the ice. ‘Well, I didn’t mean to.’

  ‘It’s your boots,’ Tania pointed out. ‘They’re too old to support your ankles properly.’

  ‘There’s nothing wrong with my boots,’ said Zac sharply. ‘They’re fine. If I took off from the wrong edge, that’s my fault.’

  ‘So do it again from the inside edge,’ said Tania, her hands on her hips.

  Zac did the jump again, but although it was the correct edge this time, it was clumsily done.

  Tania felt frustrated. Zac was such a weird mixture; obviously talented but without the solid training that she had had. He wanted to run before he could walk. He loved jumps and trying out new things, but he still wasn’t interested enough in polishing the things he considered boring, like basic crossovers.

  They had been skating together for a week now, and Zac’s lack of technique was bothering her more and more. She wanted to give him a real chance. Brock thought this could work, but Tania was starting to think that her initial fears about Zac’s lack of experience were being proved right. When they skated hand-in-hand or in the traditional partner position, Tania could hear Zac’s blades scrape the ice noisily. She had always taken pride in the silence of her skating, and the sound grated on her.