For Love & Torture_A Submissives’ Secrets Novel

by Michelle Love

  Livia began to smile, turning to pull his lips to hers. “If I ruin this dress, Moriko will actually kill me. Literally, not figuratively.”

  “Then you’d better take it off in here, woman, because there’s no way we’re not going out into that garden and making love…five…four…”

  Livia shrieked with laughter as he advanced and she quickly peeled the dress over her head. Nox tugged his own shirt of and then hauled over his shoulder.

  Livia beat a drumbeat on his buttocks as he carried her out into the garden, and when he lay her in the damp grass, she grinned up at him. “You are a doofus.”

  “A doofus that’s going to make you come again…and again…and again.”

  Son they were naked and clawing at each other as they fucked with abandon. The mist drifting up from the bayou was chilly and they both shivered and sweated as they made love. Afterwards, they lay, wrapped around each other. Livia kissed his mouth. “You make everything so magical, baby. You know what I’d love to do?”

  “What’s that?”

  “Remember that little grove where we met?”

  They walked slowly, holding their clothes until they slipped into the secluded little grove. Livia walked to the stone seat and patted it. “Come sit with me.”

  Nox sat, his face confused and Livia smiled, placing her palm on his cheek. “When I first saw you here, I thought you were the saddest person I have ever seen. And something in me wanted to take that pain away.”

  Nox leaned his forehead against hers. “You have.”

  “I hope at least I’ve begun. You deserve every happiness, Nox. Every single moment of your life should be full of joy.”

  “It is when I’m with you.”

  She kissed him. “Remember that night? I was so sure you were going to kiss me, and when Amber called your name…god, I was so disappointed. I’ve always wondered if I imagined that moment.”

  Nox shook his head. “You didn’t.” He grinned slightly. “I wanted to do a lot more than kiss you.”

  She laughed. “Well, I wanted that too. So…let’s make good on that wish right now.”

  She barely finished her sentence when he crushed his lips against hers. “God help me, Livia Chatelaine,” he said when they were both breathless, “but I think I’m falling in love with you.”

  Livia felt a surge of joy. “I love you, Nox Renaud. I don’t give a shit it’s only been a few weeks. I love you.”

  They were so wrapped up in each other as they began to make love again, they never saw the man slip quietly from the corner of the grove into the darkness.

  He watched them make love, their love for the other obvious and palpable. They made a beautiful, ethereal couple, pale skin in the moonlight, their gasps and sighs and moans of pleasure the only sound in the night. Enjoy her, Nox. Enjoy her for as long as you can.

  He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Livia’s lush body. At dinner, he had studied her, those huge, warm brown eyes, the way she had dealt with the sniping of Mavis Creek. Those pink full lips curving up in a smile. Yes, he imagined it would be very easy to fall in love with Livia Chatelaine. He would pay more attention to her, her life, her friends…it would be interesting to mess with her head too, before she became his victim.

  In the meantime, Nox. He would make his old friend think he might be losing his mind. That was next and he knew just how to do it …

  He looked back at the couple, crying out as they came and smiled. Yes, enjoy the beautiful Livia while you can, Nox. Because sooner rather than later, before the winter is out, before the last of the pine needles has fallen from the Christmas trees… she’ll be dead.

  And you, Nox, you will be rotting away in a jail cell, charged with the depraved, brutal, bloody crime-of-passion murder of the woman you love.

  Chapter Ten

  Odelle stared at Roan for a long moment, then reached into her purse for a cigarette. Roan waited, his heart thumping against his ribs. Odelle lit her cigarette and studied him.

  “Why?”

  Roan’s mouth hitched up in a smile. “Why else do people get married? I want to be your husband, of course.”

  Odelle didn’t smile. “Roan, I think we both know this isn’t a love match. Why else would you be fucking other women if it was?”

  She had a point and Roan nodded. “I admit, I have been. I’m immature, Odelle, that’s not an excuse. I can change.”

  Odelle gave a snort of laughter. “Be honest, Roan. I marry you, you get my father’s money and you’ll be back to your old ways within a year.” She sighed. “I deserve better. I deserve what your friend and that waitress have. Did you see the way they were looking at each other?”

  “We used to look at each other like that.”

  “No, we never looked at each like that.”

  Roan sat back in his chair. “So, you’re saying no.”

  Odelle half-smiled. “I didn’t say that. I’m saying I’ll think about it. Prove to me you can stay faithful. Do this. I’ll give you one week to finish whatever you’ve started with your whores. One week’s grace. Fuck them and tell them goodbye. Do that, and I’ll agree to an engagement.”

  Roan nodded. “Fine.” He got up and went to her, trailing the back of his fingers down her porcelain cheek. “Odelle, we can make this work. I’m sorry I’ve made you feel…”

  She looked at him steadily. “Second best.”

  He shook his head. “You were never that.”

  “Then never make me feel that way again, Roan, or you won’t know what’s hit you. Agreed?”

  He nodded, his blue eyes serious for once. “Agreed.”

  Livia grinned at Nox’s text message as she pushed her way into her music room.

  Good to know you’re on your way to practice your ‘fingering.’ I hope to do the same later…I love you x.

  She giggled. Since Thanksgiving and their declaration of love, their relationship had become even more fun, and definitely dirtier. They’d fucked in practically every room of his mansion – except for those two rooms he kept locked. She never mentioned them, guessing it was where his family had died. She did wonder why he had continued living there after the deaths. She would ask Sandor or Amber if she could – both of them had become her confidantes quickly and Livia was delighted that Nox’s friends accepted her so readily. Tonight, it would be the turn of her friends to spend time with the couple – Marcel and Moriko, plus another couple of staff from the restaurant, and now Livia was hoping to persuade Charvi to come too.

  The music room was empty as she dumped her stuff on the floor and sat down at the Steinway. She ran her hand over the smooth surface of the piano, wondering against at Nox’s generosity. She closed her eyes and thought back to this morning, waking up in his bed, his mouth on her nipple, then her belly and finally his tongue lashing around her clit until she came. Livia sighed. Her body still ached from the night before; they’d made love all evening and most of the night until they were exhausted, and now her vagina ached from the pounding of Nox’s huge cock. He owned her body when they made love and she loved it.

  “Hey…” Livia opened her eyes to see Charvi frowning at her. “Did you feel better?”

  Livia was confused. “Huh?”

  “You said you were sick and wouldn’t be in today.”

  Livia shook her head. “Not me.”

  “You didn’t call the admin office?”

  “No.”

  Charvi shrugged. “They must have gotten the names mixed up. Damn it, then the room is double booked.”

  “Oh.” Livia was disappointed. “No matter, I’ll come back later…shoot, no, scratch that. I promised Marcel a couple of hours at the restaurant. Well, it doesn’t matter.”

  “Sorry, honey.”

  “Can’t be helped.” Livia started to pick her things back up. Charvi smiled apologetically at her.

  “Hasn’t Nox bought you a Steinway for home use yet?”

  Livia grinned. “Where the hell would I put it? And no. It’s one thing for him to spe
nd that money on the music department, quite another to spend it on a personal gift.”

  “He doesn’t have a piano at mansion?”

  Livia shook his head. “You know, I never even considered that, but no.”

  “Huh.”

  Livia’s eyebrows shot up. “Why?”

  “You don’t know?” Charvi pulled out her iPad and flicked to a page on the internet. She handed it to Livia.

  It was a page from the archives of The Advocate, the newspaper of New Orleans, Baton Rouge and Lafayette. The story was dated twenty-five years previously.

  Local Boy Wins Prestigious Music Award.

  The son of New Orleans society maven Gabriella Renaud has been awarded top prize for his solo composition, Lux, at the New Orleans Children’s Music awards. Twelve-year-old Nox Renaud wrote and performed the piece on the cello to an audience of local luminaries at the Lafayette Emporium Music Theatre. Also rumored to be listening to the young prodigy, members of the illustrious Peabody Institute. Sources close to the Renaud family, whose patriarch, Tynan Renaud, is one of Louisiana’s richest philanthropists, say that the family is encouraging the young man to seek a future in music. Nox’s elder brother Teague is currently being feted by Harvard and Brown, and the family had a long history of academic excellence.

  Livia looked up at Charvi. “I had no idea. Why wouldn’t he mention it?”

  “I don’t know. But I’m guessing, since he and his mother – she was a pianist like you – used to play together, it’s too painful.”

  “Oh.” Livia felt a little sick. “And here I am, rattling on about…god.”

  “Hey, no, don’t do that. If I know Nox, this is like…a lifeline. Not that he’s using you to remember his mother, but through you, he can get something of her back, you know? I’m sure it’s entirely separate from how he feels about you.”

  Livia half-smiled. “We’re having dinner with Moriko and Marcel, a couple of other tonight. Come. He’d love to see you.”

  Charvi hesitated but Livia could see there was a small desire in her to see her lover’s son. “Please,” Livia said softly.

  Charvi smiled. “Alright. Just tell me where and when.”

  Livia grinned and hugged her. “It will be wonderful, I promise.”

  Charvi nodded. “Look, the next student isn’t due for ten minutes. Have a quick practice before you go.”

  “I will, thanks.”

  When she was alone, Livia couldn’t stop thinking about Nox. He was a cello player? She wondered what his composition had been like. She could picture him, his dark curls messy, hanging in his face as he bent over his cello, the intensity of his green eyes as he played. She could see him as an adult, taking the applause of his audience, looking devastatingly handsome in a suit as he played. She had to get him to open up to her.

  She was still smiling as she opened the lid of the piano. An envelope slid out and to the floor, and as she bent to pick it up, she realized it was addressed to her. She didn’t recognize the handwriting and assumed it was some college communication. She ripped open the envelope.

  Ice shot through her.

  Break it off with Nox, or I’ll make your life hell, whore.

  Livia couldn’t help the gasp of hurt that escaped her lips. What the fuck? She glanced at the envelope, then shook herself. Are you really looking for a return address? It was so vile, so hurtful for a moment that she couldn’t breathe. Then, adrenaline shot through her, a flash of anger. Who the hell would send such a spiteful note?

  “Whoever you are,” she said to herself grimly, “you can just go fuck yourself.” She crumpled the note up and shoved it into her coat pocket. She had a pretty good idea of the one person she could guess it might be. Mavis Creep. Livia grabbed her stuff and began to walk from the college to the local bus stop. She smiled grimly to herself. Well, Mavis, just for that, I’m going to ride Nox longer and harder than I ever have tonight, what do you think of that, bitch? She wishes she could say it to the other woman’s face.

  So wrapped up in her thoughts, Livia never saw the man following her. He rode the bus with her back to the French Quarter and followed her to La Chat Noir. He watched her interact with her friends – the cute Asian girl, the darkly-handsome Frenchman who clearly owned the restaurant. Close friends of hers, obviously. Good, that was good. It meant she was vulnerable.

  When her shift finished, he followed her home. Was she alone now? He imagined the fun he could have if he surprised her alone.

  But a quick thrill kill wasn’t his plan for her. This was the long game. The note would have unsettled her but not scared her. Probably just made her angry. It begins…

  He was going to enjoy this.

  Chapter Eleven

  Nox felt something shift inside him as he saw Charvi arrive at the restaurant. His hand tightened reflexively on Livia’s and she smiled up at him. “It’s okay, baby,” she whispered and kissed his cheek.

  He stood to greet his mother’s old lover. Charvi looked nervous too as he kissed her cheek. “You look just like her,” Charvi said, her voice trembling. For a moment, they stared at each other then, as a tear dropped down Charvi’s cheek, they fell into each other’s arms.

  “I miss her,” was all she said and Nox, overcome with emotion, nodded.

  “I know. I know.”

  They sat down, Nox noticing Livia quickly brushing a tear away from her eyes. He kissed her. “Thank you.” He murmured it into her ear and she smiled.

  “I love you,” she said, sweeping a loose curl away from his forehead.

  After that, the tension had all but gone from the small party. Marcel and Nox chatted about business, Charvi, Moriko and Livia about nothing in particular. Easy, fun. The restaurant they had chosen was spectacular. Nox liked Livia’s small group of friends; they were funny, erudite, down to earth - just like Liv. She was sitting in the curve of his arm, her body next to his as she ate and laughed with them all. He buried his face in her hair and breathed her in as she talked to her friends, but he felt her hand on his thigh. God, he loved this woman.

  His cell phone bleeped and he glanced at it. His throat constricted and he stiffened. Ariel. A photograph of her, laughing and smiling, her red hair backlit by the sun. He frowned. Who the hell was sending him this now?

  There was no return phone number. Another text came through. This time, it was a crime scene photo, one he had seen so many times it was seared through his brain. Ariel, dressed in a grey gown, lying on top of one of the tombs in the Lafayette Cemetery, her blood soaking both her gown and the white marble tomb she was laid upon. She looked like she had been sacrificed to some dark god. The blade of the dagger still buried deep in her belly, her eyes were open and her mouth locked forever in a scream of terror and pain. Nox felt a wave of nausea.

  “Excuse me,” he muttered and got up to go to the restroom. He made it just before he threw up. Someone was playing sick games sending him those photographs…but it hadn’t been the first time. After his family had died, friends of Ariel’s had sent him the photographs then, taunting him, making it clear they thought he was a killer. It had gotten so bad that in his lowest points, he even asked himself if he had done it…even though, rationally, he knew it was impossible. The police had questioned him for hours, days, after both tragedies and had released him without any charge, or any caution. Nox knew he was innocent – it didn’t stop him from feeling the weight of responsibility.

  HE went back out to the group. Livia looked at him, concern in her warm brown eyes. “You okay?”

  He smiled at her. “Perfectly, baby. Sorry, just felt a little queasy for a second. Probably just a kickback from being nervous earlier.”

  Livia slid her arm around his waist and kissed him tenderly. “I think it went very well,” she said, in a low voice, a subtle nod to Charvi. Nox nodded.

  “Thanks to you.”

  Livia shook her head. “You would have found each other again, with or without me.”

  Nox brushed his lips against hers. “I nev
er want to be without you again.”

  “You never will.”

  After dinner, they said their goodbyes. Nox and Charvi had a moment alone together. “Your mother would have been so proud of the man you’ve become, Nox. And she would have adored Livia. You two are made for each other.”

  Nox smiled at her. “I think so too.”

  “You promise you’ll take care of my girl?”

  “With all my heart.”

  Livia came back to stay with Nox again. As they waked into his bedroom, he smiled at her. “Liv…you know, you could move in here with me.”

  Liv was silent for a while, then she sat on the bed. “Is it too soon?”

  Nox felt a little stung but he could see where she was coming from. “I honestly don’t know. But I do know I’d like it, very much.”

  She half-smiled at him. “I would too…but I don’t want to leave Moriko in a difficult position. We can barely afford out apartment between – and before you make any grand gestures, hear me out. We both needed to do it. We both needed to prove we could – can – make it on our own. Nox, you know that fact you’re rich never bothered me – I’m not interested in your money, it’s you I want. But neither am I naïve. I still stay here with you, eat your food, travel with you…but it is important to me that I keep in touch with my base. I make my own money, I pay my own way. I have no earthly idea if I’ll ever be on the same financial footing as you – as a musician, probably not.” She laughed. “But I have to have a balance. I won’t be that woman, you know.”

  Nox crushed his lips against his. “Do you know you’re my heroine?”

  “With an ‘e’ or without?” She grinned and he laughed.

  “Both. Definitely both. And yeah, I get it. Can we compromise?”

  “How so?”

  “At least bring some stuff over here, take room in my closet so that when you’re not here…”