Beyond Broken

by Kristin Vayden

  Greyson carried me to the couch where he plopped me down on the soft leather cushion. Immediately he was hovering over me, pinning my wrists down with his hands and straddling my waist. Eyes widening, I started to breathe faster, fighting myself because it felt too perfect, too right to have him so close, so intimate.

  “Say it, Sophia.” Greyson leaned forward and whispered in my ear.

  I swallowed hard, my blood roaring so loudly in my ears I almost couldn’t hear him. His nose traced the side of my neck and he nibbled gently, sending goose bumps over my whole body. “Two words… that’s all I need,” he murmured against my skin as his body pressed into mine further, branding me all at once.

  “You… you were right,” I whispered, my voice thick from tension and desire, mind-numbing, hot desire.

  “Uh-huh. That’s three words… I still get to tease you…” He chuckled lightly, the deep sound vibrating against my chest as he covered me more fully.

  Every part he touched craved more of him, all I wanted to do was forget everything and lose myself with him. “Greyson…”

  “I love the way you say my name,” he murmured against my lips. Their fullness slightly brushing my own, teasing them with his flavor so close, yet so far away.

  Unable to resist, I closed my eyes and whispered his name once more, caressing it with the tone of my voice.

  “Sophia…” Greyson’s voice was hoarse as I felt his body tighten against mine. The pressure on my hands turned into anchoring hold not for me, but for him. When I opened my eyes I saw the desperate fight for control waging war within his gaze. At once his gaze turned resolute and he kissed me fully, abruptly, as if unable to find my mouth fast enough to satisfy his craving. My body exploded in heat as he caressed my lips, taunting them and tasting me, diving deeper till I released the final shred of control that held me back.

  As if tasting my surrender, he groaned, arching into me and releasing my hands so that he could cradle my head. His hands dove into my hair, taking it from its loose elastic ponytail and rubbing its thick texture within his fingers. I kissed him ardently, with abandon, as I let myself become overwhelmed with his flavor and passion. One arm moved down and behind my back, pulling me up and closer into his frame until I could feel his heart beating in his chest as it pressed against my own. The sound of his desperate breathing echoed in my ears. My hands explored, memorizing each mountain and valley of his back and shoulders before losing myself in the soft yet wiry texture of his hair.

  His stubble burned against the flesh around my mouth but it was a welcome pain, one that reminded me who caused it. Suddenly Greyson broke away, hovering above me while his shoulders rose and fell in heated intakes of breath.

  I just stared. His eyes were excited and full of frantic desire but holding to a desperate restraint. He searched my face then closed his eyes, effectively blocking my window into his soul. His shoulders relaxed slightly and he hung his head a little farther down until his forehead rested on mine. After a moment he relaxed further, turning so that he was not over me, but beside me pulling me into an embrace that was more tender than passionate.

  “Right now I want a gold star for the herculean self-control I’m using. This is the hardest thing I think I’ve ever done. I want credit for it.” Greyson smiled crookedly as his gaze locked with mine. Reaching up, he brushed back a few stray strands of hair from my face before trailing my jaw line with his finger.

  “Credit given,” I whispered, lost in his gaze.

  “Thanks. I just… I told you I’m doing this right. And I will… though I think it might kill me in the end.” Greyson closed his eyes and exhaled deeply.

  “I think you’ll survive,” I teased as I reached up and gently rubbed his cheek, going against the grain of his shadow of a beard. The sensation of fine sandpaper embedded itself in my memory.

  “Surviving is not nearly as gratifying as sex, Sophia.” Greyson turned his gaze back to me.

  “I’m sure you’re right… but—”

  “I know. I might not know much about all this God stuff, but even I know that it’s against the rules to sleep around.”

  “You’re right.”

  “Now she says it… wait.” Greyson rose up on an elbow, a smile teasing his swollen lips. “Is that twice in one night that you’ve said I’m right? Whoa… this is going to go to my head,” he teased and I punched him in the shoulder.

  “Ouch!”

  “Whatever. That so did not hurt.” I rolled my eyes.

  “I’d take whatever abuse you dished out as long as I got to stay here with you in my arms,” Greyson said quietly, his eyes caressing my face once more.

  “I need…” I swallowed and tried to gather my thoughts. Whenever he looked at me like that, my mind dissolved into a useless mess. “I’ve gotta go…”

  “I know…” Greyson offered me a sad smile. “Do me a favor though?” He tugged on a piece of hair.

  “Hmm?”

  “Give me your phone number.”

  “Um… you’ll see me in like…” I rose up and glanced at the clock. “Less than twelve hours. Seriously.”

  “I know… but will you still give it to me?” His eyes took on an imploring expression.

  “Sure…” I responded, unable to deny him anything I was able to give freely.

  “Thanks,” he whispered then kissed my lips once more, fleeting but achingly sweet.

  I wrote down my number and handed it to him.

  “Why do I get the feeling I’m doing this kind of backward?” Greyson chuckled as he immediately entered the number into his iPhone 5.

  “Because you are,” I teased as I picked up my iPad, groaning as I realized just how long I had been in Greyson’s room. Thankfully, I had about five minutes before I was to clock out or else I would have had some difficult explaining to do. “I’ve gotta go.” I turned and headed for the door. My hand had just touched the cold metallic handle when Greyson spun me around and kissed me passionately on the lips.

  “Because less than twelve hours is still way too long,” he whispered as he released me. I blinked a few times before I was able to nod. As I walked down the hall and clocked out, my heart skipped several beats as I remembered his kiss, the way he said my name and how he had restrained himself so mightily when I knew it wasn’t something he normally did. The smile teased my lips all the way to my car, where my phone buzzed.

  11 hours, 45 minutes. —Greyson

  I smiled all the way to the grocery store to purchase the best bacon I could find. Silencing my mind as it blared the irritating sound of alarm.

  Chapter Eleven

  I received a few curious glances as I walked down the hall toward Greyson’s room with a large grocery bag. As I shifted the weight to knock on the door, it opened suddenly causing me to release the bag.

  “What the—”

  The paper sack hit the floor with a loud smack and broke open, sending packages of bacon sliding down the tiled floor. I watched one sail a good five feet away then glanced back shyly to Greyson. He was already bending down to pick up the scattered packages.

  “Uh… Sophia, were you planning on feeding me all this bacon at once?” Greyson gave me a mischievous grin as he stacked the packages in his arms.

  “Nope… cardiac arrest isn’t a pleasant way to go… or so I’ve been told,” I teased as I went to grab the last package.

  “Noted.” Greyson pushed the door back to let me in. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled for the bacon but you sure went all out.” He chuckled as he set the packages on the counter and leaned against it.

  “Well I was told, quite specifically…” I raised an eyebrow. “That I was to bring bacon, real, not fake, bacon. So I figured if I brought one measly package I’d get in trouble. Thus, the bounty of bacon.” I did a little bow after my speech and extended my arm to the counter where the packages were sprawled.

  “Ahh… I see.” Greyson smirked. “So basically the bacon was insurance.”

  “Insurance?”
/>   “Yeah, you want to stay on my good side…” His eyes took on an amused glint.

  “Whatever… I just didn’t want to get yelled at.” I tilted my chin up defiantly.

  “Yeah… you keep telling yourself that. You like me. Admit it.”

  “I do… when you’re not obnoxious, or annoying, or…” I stopped before I continued, giving away too much.

  “Or?” Greyson took a step toward me, his gray eyes probing, searching my own for what I didn’t say.

  “Nothing.”

  “Um… with you it’s never nothing. I thought lying was a sin anyway.” Greyson continued his advance.

  “It is, it…” I took a deep breath. “You always have to push, don’t you?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

  “Look who’s talking…” Greyson rolled his eyes and paused, crossing his arms.

  I crossed my arms as well, not willing to admit anything.

  “Fine, don’t tell me. I’ll just figure it out on my own.” He shrugged and turned back to the little kitchenette and pulled out a pan. The crinkling sound of plastic ripping sounded in the small area.

  “Need help?”

  “Believe it or not, I’m perfectly capable of cooking my own bacon.” Greyson glanced over his broad shoulder.

  “Well I’ll prepare to be amazed then.”

  “You do that.” Greyson didn’t bother to turn that time, but gently laid each strip of bacon in a pan then set it on the range, turning the knob to high. I watched, curious. Growing up as he did, surely he didn’t ever need to make his own food, yet he still seemed to know enough about cooking to make bacon. It might not be much, but it was something. Greyson continued to surprise me. He wasn’t who he seemed, yet at the same time, he was everything that could be imagined. You expected the rich, entitled persona to rear its ugly head, but you didn’t expect him to be real, to level with you and be so comfortable with his own faults. I didn’t know if that was humility or just over-confidence. Probably a strange mix of both, what I did know was that it was rare.

  “Hey!” Greyson clapped in front of my face and I jumped, feeling my face heat with embarrassment. “Lost somewhere, Sophia?” Greyson quirked his eyebrow then leaned against the countertop next to me.

  “Just thinking.” I shrugged, praying my face would cool off.

  “About?”

  “You, actually.”

  “Me? I like this… wait… do I like this? What were you thinking?”

  “Well, I was trying to figure out if you were humble or just overconfident.”

  “Okay… not what I was expecting. Though I don’t know why that surprises me. Wait… overconfident. I’m thinking I should be offended.”

  I couldn’t help a loud giggle that escaped at his mock glare. “No… don’t be offended. It’s just that… you’re so comfortable with yourself, including your shortcomings. You don’t accept them, but you’re willing to examine yourself and see yourself as you are… not sugarcoat it. That’s… admirable. I was just trying to determine if you were just really humble, or so confident that it didn’t bother you.” I shrugged.

  “Oh, it bothers me.” Greyson pushed away from the countertop and flipped the bacon. “But you don’t get anywhere by staying where you are. You know? If I just accepted the fact that I was an addict, for example, then I would have never gotten treatment, never overcome it, or… met you. When you move to change what’s wrong, good things happen. You might have to fight through some shit, but you’ll get there.” He shrugged.

  “Hmm… interesting.”

  “Interesting as in, ‘wow Greyson’s deep and oh-so-hot’, or interesting as in ‘eccentric and weird but not in a good way’?”

  “Oh, Greyson’s so deep and hot…” I began to fan myself and leaned heavily against the counter top.

  “Thanks… I think.”

  “Hey, you asked for it.”

  “I did… which somehow makes it worse… okay! How about my bacon?” Greyson clapped his hands and rubbed them together.

  “Hey, don’t be insecure,” I teased and I walked up to him, pressing my hand into his back. Through the thin fabric I could feel the solid and firmness of his skin and the tight muscle beneath. My heart skipped.

  “Says the one who just was pondering whether I was overconfident.” He glanced back at me and raised a mocking eyebrow.

  “I stand corrected.” I shrugged.

  “Yeah…” Greyson shook his head but grinned. “So did you bring anything else for breakfast, or is it just bacon? I mean, I’m totally okay with that, just wondering.”

  “It’s up to you. Your breakfast is still coming from the cafeteria.”

  “Hooray… yogurt.” He did a fist pump in the air then gave me a glare. “Seriously? Bacon it is.” Greyson put the strips onto a plate. As he walked with the plate toward the couch, he picked up a piece. “Shit, that’s hot! Damn.” Shaking his hand he began to blow over the steaming meat.

  “Yeah, who could have seen that coming?” I teased as I followed him.

  “Yeah… no bacon for you. You are officially cut off.”

  “Fine.” I shrugged then backtracked to find my iPad. After I sat opposite him and reached out for his hand I noticed he was watching me with a curious expression.

  “What?” I paused.

  “Nothing… it just feels different. You know?” He ducked his head down for a moment and rubbed the back of his neck, something I noticed he only did when nervous or unsure. The particular character trait was endearing, vulnerable, alluring as a warm fire on a cold winter night.

  “Different?” I tilted my head and leaned forward.

  “Yeah, you know. You coming here, bringing in breakfast and cooking with me… it’s… I don’t know… domestic. Does that sound lame?” He gazed up at me with a hesitant expression clouding his eyes.

  “No. Not lame. I didn’t really think about it like that.”

  “Never mind.” Greyson shook his head and reached for another piece of bacon.

  “Hey, don’t eat your feelings,” I teased.

  “Whatever, says the girl that won’t be getting any of this.” He gestured to the bacon with one hand while making a show of slowly bringing the crispy strip to his mouth and biting on it, chewing slowly.

  “That’s not sexy, that’s disturbing.” I shook my head suppressing a laugh as his eyes rolled back and he swung his shoulders, playing it up.

  “Mmmmmm.”

  “Only adding to the disturbing factor, Greyson.” I sighed, entertained and thrilled to see him so free, so unburdened.

  “You’re just jealous.” He winked.

  “You got me.”

  “Of the bacon.” His lips twisted in a wicked grin.

  “Because… wait. Never mind.” My face heated over what I almost said and how it could be taken.

  Greyson’s laugh rang through the room, causing my skin to prickle in gooseflesh at the masculine sound. “Never change, Sophia. I love it when your face turns that particular color.”

  “Shut up,” I groused, leaning back in the chair and crossing my arms, but I couldn’t help the grin that broke through.

  “Here. It’s my peace offering.” Greyson extended a strip of bacon to me and bowed his head, peeking up when I didn’t snatch it from his hand.

  “Thanks.” I reached out and took it, savoring the crispy texture mixed with the salty and smoky flavor. I closed my eyes.

  “Yeah, you do that better than I do. I could watch you eat all day.” Greyson’s gaze was intense as he watched me. “Want more?” He was immediately handing me another strip.

  I hesitantly reached out.

  “C’mon Sophia. If I eat all this I’ll lose my cut, ripped body and we all know how much you love it.” He leaned back and stretched above his head, flexing and then lifting his shirt to show off his hard abs.

  My eyes followed his movements, I was unable to glance away as my gaze greedily took in every inch, immediately remembering what it felt like to have his ‘cut, ripped’ body pr
essed against mine. My face heated enough to force me to glance away and clear my throat.

  “Ah, so the truth comes out. She only wants me for my body.” Greyson shook his head but flexed again.

  “Yeah… my secret’s out.” I smacked his hard chest, my fingers tingling afterward from the contact.

  “And all I want is someone to love me for what’s inside.” He shook his head sadly, pouting.

  “You’re such a dork.” I giggled at his pitiful expression.

  “It’s worth it to hear your laugh.” Greyson’s eyes grew intense once more, his gray changing to more of passionate silver that stole my train of thought.

  I jumped when a knock sounded on the door.

  Greyson gave me an exasperated expression then stood to answer it. As he walked toward the door I watched his swagger, the way his jeans fit his lower body hugging his muscular legs.

  “Hey, Doc. What’s up?” Greyson let Dr. Solomon in and followed him into the living room where I waited.

  “Good morning, Greyson. And you too, Miss Holton. I have great news.” Dr. Solomon tucked his iPad under his arm and addressed Greyson. “Dr. Remington gave you the all clear. You should be on your way the day after tomorrow at the latest. He was quite impressed with your progress and felt you were ready.” Dr. Solomon nodded and reached out to shake Greyson’s hand.

  “Wow, thanks.” Greyson shook Dr. Solomon’s hand and smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. When he glanced over to me, his eyes were wary, slightly panic-stricken. All emotions I felt myself, for all the same reasons. How quickly things changed. Not more than a few days ago I was telling myself that I could never kiss him again. That I was a fool for having any attachment to him. And I was a fool, because I had let Greyson break down all my defenses giving him a key to my heart.

  Two days. We only had two days.

  “It’s been a pleasure to work with you, Greyson. We’ll finish up your counseling today, and make all the necessary arrangements for your departure.” Dr. Solomon took out his iPad once again but paused. “Have you been cooking, Greyson? Tired of the yogurt, huh?” Dr. Solomon teased.

  “You have no idea.” Greyson rolled his eyes and gave me a grin.