Promise Me Always

by Kari March

  The next morning Palmer called in sick to work and we spent the whole day lounging by the pool. I didn’t hear anything from Jared and was starting to think that maybe this was just a freak incident and he was going to leave me alone. I talked Palmer out of making me call the cops and assured her that if anything else happened, I would call them and file a report.

  I was excited for Friday because our old friend, Davis was finally home from his deployment and his welcome home party was on Friday. I couldn’t wait to see him and Morgan, his on again/off again girlfriend. They had an interesting relationship— when Davis left, he never expected Morgan to stay with to him. He would always leave by telling her he loved her, but didn’t want to tie her down while he was gone for a whole year. She never did anything with any other guy, though. She loved him too much and knew that he was the one. As soon as he returned, they would pick up exactly where they left off. I knew they would be married soon and we were all hoping that the homecoming party would be where he would propose. This group needed a happily-ever-after.

  Davis and Blake were good friends and the party was being held at Shane’s house so, more than likely, Blake would be there. I didn’t know what would happen when we saw each other and I was scared and anxious to see him again. I knew exactly how my body would react when he was near because it was aching for his touch every day, but I had no idea how my heart would react.

  I finally gave in to Devin’s persistent nagging and decided to join him and Matt at Shane’s house for Davis’ coming home party. Davis had joined the marines, following in his father’s footsteps, as soon as we graduated high school. He had been away for almost a year now and just got back a few days ago from his third deployment. There was always a massive party in his honor when he returned home and, being that he was one of my good friends, I decided it would be a bad idea to miss it. When Devin asked me again, I gave in and got dressed.

  As we pulled up to Shane’s house, I got a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I started thinking of Tess immediately, wondering what she was doing and where she was. I was curious if she was over me yet. It has been almost a week and I figured she would have moved on by now. I wanted to call her to make sure she was okay, but decided against it. That would only make things worse if she was moving on. We got out of the truck and I tried to push away the uneasy feeling that I was having.

  Once we got inside, I started to feel a little better… until I saw Palmer and Cole standing in the kitchen. Fuck! I knew if they were here, then Tess wasn’t very far behind them. I had completely forgotten that Tess and I shared a lot of the same friends and, now that Jared was out of the picture, she would be hanging around a lot more.

  I don’t think I will be able to handle it if she shows up here tonight.

  Just as I was about to ask Devin to take me home, I saw Palmer pushing her way through the crowd of people, heading my way. To make matters worse, she didn’t look to happy to see me.

  She started yelling before she was even halfway across the room, “What the hell, Blake! Do you have any idea what kind of damage you’ve done to my sister? I outta beat the living shit out of you right now, but I promised Tess I wouldn’t.” When she finally made it over to me, she stopped about a foot away. She had her hands on her hips and anger was coming off of her in waves. She stared at me with fury in her eyes. “I love you, Blake, but seriously—you are the biggest dumbass. She loves you… did you know that?”

  My heart broke into a million pieces.

  I knew she loved me, but I loved her more. And that made it my responsibility to protect her, to stay away. I don’t think anyone would ever understand my reasoning behind what I was doing, but it made sense to me—so I was sticking with it.

  “I know she does, Palmer, and that’s why I’m doing this. I’m no good for her. If I thought for one second I could be everything she deserves, I’d go to her. I’d fight the entire world to be with her. I fucking love her.” I looked straight into her eyes so she could see I was dead serious. “And that’s why I’m staying away.”

  I stood my ground in front of Palmer but, inside, I was slowly dying all over again. There was no way Tess really loved me. She was just in love with love; it had nothing to do with me. At least that is what I had convinced myself of. I had relived this nightmare every day since I left her and I would continue to relive it for the rest of my life.

  She watched me intently, her somber eyes never leaving mine. “Blake, when are you going to realize that you are everything she needs?” Her eyes softened and her head tilted with sympathy. “And she’s everything you need.”

  Without a warning, she spun on her heel and walked away. I was completely taken back by what she said. How could she possibly think I was what Tess needed after last weekend? My head was starting to hurt and I needed a drink.

  I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a beer out of the fridge. Downing the whole thing in one gulp, I grabbed another before I made my way outside. I needed to find Devin so I could get the fuck out of here. It was too much—seeing Palmer and talking about Tess crushed me. I wanted to go home and drink away my sorrows. I wasn’t ready to deal with any of this.

  Finally, I spotted Devin. He was talking to Shane and Matt in the backyard. Just as I was walking up to them, I heard Shane’s phone start to ring and that uneasy feeling returned to my stomach. I watched him as he looked down to see who it was. A giant, smug smiled spread across his face and instantly, I knew it was Tess.

  He looked right at me as he answered it. “Hey, doll, where are you?”

  It took every ounce of control not to punch him in the fucking jaw. He was getting off on this shit. Tess didn’t mean anything to him, she was just a conquest. There was no way she would ever sleep with him and he knew that, so why the fuck was he still trying?

  Just as I was about to grab the phone from him, Shane’s smile dropped from his face and I knew something was wrong. “What? Seriously? Okay, Tess, calm down. Just keep driving. Don’t pull into my driveway, just go right past the house and turn around in the cul-de-sac. We’ll be waiting for his ass when you get there.” My blood started to boil. I knew something was wrong—I had felt it as soon as we got here

  “What the hell is going on?” Nothing mattered anymore. All my insecurities and doubt flew out the window—all that mattered in my world was her. I loathed the fact that she was in trouble and I wasn’t her first phone call—Shane was. And I felt like shit that I had no idea what was happening.

  “It’s Jared,” he said. As soon as the name registered in my head, I was livid. “He’s following her again.”

  Wait… what did he mean again?

  I didn’t even have time to ask questions. Shane took off for the front of the house and Devin, Matt and I were right behind him. As we walked through the living room, I grabbed Cole and Palmer, filling them in as we made our way outside. Palmer was worried. She had a look of fear on her face as we approached the street and I knew this was serious.

  “What’s going on you guys? Why the fuck is Jared following her?” I was getting really fucking pissed. Someone better fill me in right fucking now!

  “Jared’s been stalking Tess ever since she broke up with him. He’s been sending her texts and pictures of the two of you together and he’s been sitting outside her apartment at night. The other day he followed her to our place and even got out at a red light and pounded on her window,” Palmer said, her words all rushing together. “He’s lost his damn mind!”

  My whole body shook as my rage consumed me. “Did she call the cops?”

  “I tried to make her, but she said it wasn’t that big of a deal. I’m really worried about her. He was keeping his distance when you were around but, now that you’re not…” She trailed off when I snapped my head in her direction.

  I was distracted from Palmer when I heard the purr of an engine make the turn onto Shane’s street and Tess’ red Honda Civic came speeding towards us. I could see Tess’ face when she drove past the house and she
looked terrified. She had been crying and there were streaks of black mascara running down her cheeks. Palmer immediately took off after Tess’ car, as the rest of us waited for Jared’s car to pass. But it never did. I stepped into the street to see if I could see him. Just as I did, I saw a black beamer speed by the end of the street.

  “That was him! The fucking pussy won’t even think of turning because he knows we’re all here.” I heard Shane say as he came up behind me.

  I spun around and stared at him, every muscle in my body tight as I shook with fury. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me about this shit, Shane?”

  He stared at me with annoyance. “First of all, I haven’t seen you all week. Second, it isn’t really any of your business anymore because you aren’t with her. And third, Tess didn’t want you to know. She made us all promise that we wouldn’t say a word to you.” My heart sank when he said the last part and my knees almost gave out from underneath me. If I didn’t have so much adrenaline coursing through me, I surely would have sunk down to the ground and never gotten up. She didn’t want me to know?

  Shane was right—we weren’t together, but that didn’t mean shit to me. I loved her and needed her to be safe. I would always have the urge to protect her and shit like this wasn’t supposed to be happening.

  I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself down, but then I heard her scared voice coming from the driveway. I hadn’t spotted her yet, but I knew it was her. I would be able to recognize her voice in the middle of a burning inferno, even if it was just a whisper.

  “Why did you tell him, Palm? He doesn’t need to be involved in this. It doesn’t concern him anymore.” My eyes followed the sound of her voice and then I saw her. She was standing on the other side of Palmer’s Tahoe—crying into her hands while Palmer rubbed circles on her back. I slowly started making my way over to her. As I got closer, I made sure to stay out of sight. She didn’t want to see me yet and I didn’t blame her. Lucky for me, there was a huge tree in Shane’s front yard and I was easily hidden from their view.

  “I didn’t really have a choice, Tess. He was freaking out and you were in danger. I’m sorry,” Palmer told her.

  “I’m not ready to face him. I’m going home.” I heard the anxiety and hurt in her voice when she spoke and all I wanted to do was hold her and tell her how fucking sorry I was for leaving her.

  I knew eavesdropping was a dick head thing to do, but I couldn’t help it. This was the closest I had been to her in almost a week and I missed her so fucking much. Slowly, my body started to take over—inching itself closer, like it was metal being pulled to a magnet. With only the Jeep between us, I was out in the open. All she’d have to do is turn around and I would be staring into her hypnotizing brown eyes through the window.

  “Like hell you are! You’re not going anywhere alone. Just give me a second to find Cole. I’m going with you.” I watched Palmer turn around in search of Cole and, as her footsteps faded away, I felt this overpowering need to be next to Tess.

  I never took my eyes off her as I made my way around the front of the Tahoe. She still hadn’t seen me and I took the opportunity to admire her perfection. She looked absolutely stunning as the sunlight beamed down on her caramel hair and her golden skin. She was picture perfect and I couldn’t believe she wasn’t mine anymore. Who was I kidding—she would always be mine.

  She kept taking in slow, deep breaths and I could tell she was trying to calm herself down. With one more step, I placed myself just a few feet away from where she was standing. I leaned against the hood of the Tahoe, making just the slightest noise as her eyes shot up and met mine. She looked scared, hurt, and nervous as her fingers found her hair, weaving sections of it around her fingers tightly.

  “Are you okay?” It was all I could muster, as her gaze shifted to her feet.

  “Um… Yeah… I’m fine.” She mumbled quietly, her body trembling slightly. I couldn’t believe I was actually talking to her. She didn’t want to face me and I was making her uncomfortable by being here. I could feel the tension in the air growing. I needed to get out of there before I gave in and begged her to take me back, even though I was positive there was no way she still loved me after what I had done to her. I just needed to let her know I was still here for her—no matter what.

  “If you ever need anything, baby… uh, Tess… anything, I’m still here okay? I mean it. If Jared does anything again—I want you to tell me.” I took another step towards her and she started shaking even harder.

  “It really isn’t a big deal. But thanks, Blake.” I could tell she was lying.

  “I’m serious. I will kill him if does anything to you. Do you understand?” I asked, fighting my need to take her in my arms and hold her. “If I find out from anyone that he has been in contact with you, I will take matters into my own hands.” I could hear the anger in my own voice and decided to take a step back. I wasn’t upset with her, but just talking about Jared made me want to break his fucking neck.

  “You ready to go, Tess?” Palmer asked as she came out of the house. Tess and I both jumped a little at her voice.

  “Yeah, let’s go.” Tess looked up at me through her lashes as she spoke to Palmer. I didn’t want her to leave. I needed her with me. I knew I could protect her if she was with me, but there wasn’t much I could do once she left. I had to make myself clear to her that I meant what I said.

  “I’m not kidding, Tess. I’m still here and I always will be,” I said before she could turn around. It took all I had not to break down. I didn’t feel whole without her. This week had been the hardest week of my life and I was beginning to think that maybe I was being fucking stupid.

  She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and gave me a small, shy smile. The sparkle in her eyes returned for just an instant as she gazed at me. She looked at me as though the past week had never happened. She was my Tess again, even if it was for just a second. I could have stayed in that moment for the rest of my life, but I knew that was impossible. I left her and it was my choice. All I could do was smile at her, to let her know I meant what I said.

  She turned around when Palmer yelled for her to come on, but after a couple steps, she spun back around again, her eyes meeting mine. A single tear escaped from the corner of her eye, sparkling in the sunlight as it ran down her face. With a low, soft voice, she whispered, “Promise me?”

  My heart skipped a beat at the question. My heart soared, realizing that she did love me.

  I swallowed down the lump that had formed in my throat so I could answer with the only thing I would ever say when she asked me that question—“Always.”

  The rest of night was torture—all I could think about was Tess. I couldn’t take it anymore when a drunk as fuck Shane started to divulge the “Jared and Tess story” for a third time. I stood, bumping Shane’s head with my elbow, completely by accident, may I add, and headed outside.

  I saw Davis and Morgan chatting away with a group of people on the corner of the patio. I didn’t recognize any of them, so kept my distance and leaned against the side of the house, sipping on my beer. When Davis nodded at me the petite, blonde haired woman standing in front of him turned around slowly.

  Holy Shit! Is that…?

  I had to close my eyes for a minute, shaking my head trying to clear away the vision I knew I was imagining. When I opened them again the woman, whom I could have sworn was a figment of my imagination, was walking towards me. It was Kristi Andrews—my first and only girlfriend. The bitch that broke my heart back in high school.

  I hadn’t spoken to her in over four years. Right after junior year, the year she fucked me over, her family moved and she had to transfer to a different school. I was really relieved when she did. It was getting harder to avoid seeing her on a daily basis and, every time I did, all the memories of her and I would come rushing back to me. The torment I experienced back then was nothing like the agony I was going through now though. I would gladly feel the pain Kristi inflicted on me over and over again
than feel the slightest sliver of the way I felt this week.

  I couldn’t believe she was there. She looked exactly the same as the last time I saw her. Her short blonde hair framed her face and her emerald eyes were the same color as the gem, and, oddly enough, her favorite color, too.

  She did, however, look a tad slutty in her short jean skirt and low cut red tank top. And, to top her whorish look, she had on a ridiculously high pair of red heels. This was a bar-b-que after all, what the fuck was she doing in shoes like that?

  She approached me slowly, looking me over with a thirst in her eyes. I just stared at her, dumbfounded, as she came closer. She stopped in front of me, leaving only a small space between the two of us. It took me a minute to realize just how close she was, but when the smell of lavender surrounded me, I snapped out of my reverie.

  “Blake Bentley! Long time, no see,” she said as she took a sip of the pink liquid that was in her cup. I couldn’t help but notice how fruity it smelled. She was always the prissy type and it didn’t surprise me that she was sipping the sweet smelling concoction with a straw. I wondered if there is even any liquor in it.

  “Kristi,” I simply said as I looked away from her. Maybe if I ignored her, she would get the point and leave me alone.

  “That’s all you’re going to say to me after what you did to me in high school?” she asked. I snapped my head back at her, brows creased, staring at her like she had two fucking heads.

  “What I did to you? Have you lost your fucking mind?” I asked in disbelief. “You broke up with me for no goddamn reason. So yes, that is all I have to say to you.” I pushed passed her and started making my way back inside. I needed to get the fuck out of here.

  “I broke up with you because you cheated on me, you ass! Apparently, you’re the same arrogant prick that you were in high school!” she yelled at me.