Reclaiming Us

by Richard, Nicole

  Mama rubbed my back, and my eyes burned. “He had decided two weeks ago that he wasn’t going to reenlist.”

  “Is there anything we can do for Roger or Sue?”

  Mama combed her fingers through my hair. “They haven’t told Hailey yet. Sue could barely take the news herself.”

  “Isn’t Hailey home for Christmas?”

  “She just got in last night.”

  “God, she’s going to be devastated that her brother is gone.” I sighed and brushed away a tear before sliding off my stool. “I think I’m going to head home. I could use some time to myself. Will you let me know if I can help?”

  “I will, sweetie. Call if you need anything.”

  “Thanks, Mama.” I kissed her cheek.

  My mind had been elsewhere on the short drive back to my house. When I closed and locked my front door, I was glad Jase had somewhere else he needed to be. Having some time alone to process the news wouldn’t have gone well with him here. He wouldn’t have understood, which was partially my own fault since he knew next to nothing about my past.

  I tossed myself down on the couch and thought about calling RJ, but I had no idea if he kept the same number all these years or how he might react to hearing from me. He might very well tell me to go to hell, and could I blame him?

  Then I thought about Lilly and where she might be, which only made me feel worse. I didn’t even know when I had spoken to her last. I should call her, too, but I had no idea where the hell she was or if she would even want to hear from me.

  What a day of mind fucks. I wanted to crawl into a hole and take a really long nap.

  “Delivery for Addilyn Montgomery,” the young delivery guy stated. He faced the clipboard toward me in one hand while holding an exquisite vase of what looked like two‑dozen Fire and Ice Roses in the other.

  “Yes, I’m Addilyn.”

  “If you could sign here please?”

  “Sure.” I signed the delivery log. Before taking the flowers, I reached over to my purse and grabbed five dollars. “Thank you.” I handed him the tip.

  “Thank you, I appreciate it.”

  The flowers were beautiful, and I set them down on the table just as my phone buzzed. I bet it was Jase texting to let me know this was just the first thing for whatever he had planned.

  It wasn’t.

  It was a text to tell me he was sick and wasn’t going to make it.

  Fighting my frustrations, I tossed the phone next to me then unpinned the little card attached to the big silver bow. It was equally as disappointing as the damn text.

  “Happy Birthday Babe, I love you.” They were nothing but ordinary words written on a generic card. My back slumped into the couch, and I sat there on the brink of fuming. I tossed the card next to the flowers and resisted the urge to throw the vase across the room.

  It was New Year’s Eve. In less than eight hours, the clock would strike midnight, chiming in my twenty‑fifth birthday, and instead of my fiancé here to help me celebrate, I had two dozen roses to take his place. I sighed. It wasn’t as if I felt much like celebrating anyway. This past week, I had been in a revolving funk, and I had hoped having Jase here would change that. The roses were pretty and all, but they weren’t the same as having him here.

  Had I have known he would accept a residency in Charleston, I never would have accepted a teaching position here. Jase was so persuasive and thought about the bigger picture. That if one of us was already established, it would be easier once the other made the move.

  Maybe this was just me missing him? Maybe he was still all in with me, and the distance was playing tricks on my mind.

  All these back and forth emotions lately had drained me, a short nap sounded good right about then. I stretched out on the couch with my phone in hand, ready to listen to my voice mail when the doorbell rang.

  “Ughh, what the—” I mumbled and huffed as I threw my legs off the couch. I barely stomped three feet toward the door before the doorbell chimed again. “Coming!” I yelled.

  Irritated, I didn’t even think to check to see who was out there before unlocking the deadbolt. I let the door swing open, and a wide smile spread across my lips, and I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.

  Evin, my best friend who lived two hundred fifty‑some miles away, was standing on my front porch.

  “Oh my god, Evin!” I screeched and just about jumped into her arms, hugging her tight. “What are you doing here?” I stepped back, holding her at arm’s length.

  “Well . . . if I recall, it is someone’s birthday tonight, and what kind of best friend would I be if I weren’t here to celebrate it with her?” Her smile was radiant as I grabbed her hand and pulled her into the house.

  “You want something to drink, eat, are you hungry at all?” I rambled, beyond excited my best friend was there. I loved Grace, Natalie, and Monique, but no one could hold a flame to a girl’s best friend.

  “Nah, I’m good. I do have to pee, though. That was one hell of a drive.”

  We both laughed, and I pointed down the hall.

  Evin arched her back to peek into the living room. “Nice roses.”

  “From Jase,” I replied flatly.

  “Uh, normally when a girl gets flowers from her man, she’s happy about it.”

  I sighed. “I know. I’m just irritated that he won’t be here for my birthday.” I waved my hand, dismissing the situation. “Go pee, then we can talk.”

  While she disappeared behind the closed door, I grabbed us both some wine.

  “So . . . what would you like to do for your birthday?” she asked, strolling into the living room and having a seat next to me on the couch. I handed her a glass, which she swirled and sipped appreciatively.

  “I was thinking about keeping it low‑key this year.” That wasn’t a total lie.

  “Yeah, that’s not going to work. I know you’ve got a lot going on right now, but it’s your birthday. We are going out.”

  Evin always had been great at convincing me when I needed to take a break from reality. Analyzing her cheeky smile, I knew there was no way of getting out of going out. That didn’t mean I wouldn’t at least try to persuade her otherwise.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to have a slumber party instead? We can order pizza, get wasted off cheap wine and even cheaper champagne, and act crazy in my old boyfriend’s T‑shirts?” I stared at her with an exaggerated, hopeful smile. “We could even go to the extent of toilet papering someone’s house.” I laughed at myself for suggesting such juvenile and immature entertainment.

  “Nope. We are dressing you up.” She grabbed one of her bags and pulled out a gift bag with a large, slightly smashed silver bow. “For you. Happy Birthday.”

  “So, whose car are we taking?” I asked Evin as I locked the front door.

  “Neither,” Evin replied from somewhere behind me. Completely and utterly confused, I turned to look at her, but she just smiled at me and gestured to the sleek and shiny black Porsche. The doors were open, inviting us in, and my jaw dropped. I looked at her, pointed to the car, and looked back at the car.

  “How?”

  Evin shrugged, as if it were nothing that a ridiculously expensive, luxury sports car was sitting in my driveway. I had never driven anything that expensive.

  “Don’t get your panties too wet, it’s just a rental, and the fun ends at midnight, princess.” She winked then shoulder bumped me. “Ready?”

  “Are you freaking kidding me? I can’t drive this.”

  I really wanted to drive it.

  “Seriously, Addie, it’s just a car,” she stated nonchalantly. “Let’s go, time to raise some birthday hell.”

  We paraded around the streets of Savannah like two socialites on a mission. High on luxury and leather, I pulled into the hotel Evin directed me to, and I might have revved the engine a bit, which probably made the valet raise his eyebrows at us. We both slid out, and I handed the attendant a twenty.

  “Ready?” I nodded as Evin linked her
arm in mine.

  The hotel was posh with a massive crystal chandelier and décor that screamed elegance, beauty, and charm.

  “This way.” Evin led me toward the right.

  Not having a clue at what to expect, I followed her onto the pool deck and sucked in a soft breath. It was as if I’d stepped right into something from a Hollywood movie set.

  The women were in full‑length evening gowns, and the men—good lord—the men, were in suits or tuxedos.

  How did Evin find out about this party?

  “If we get separated, we meet by the pool, okay?” Evin said, shooting me an excited smile.

  “Got it.” I gave her a thumbs up, something we always did if, by some chance, we thought we were going to be separated.

  “Champagne?” A handsome server in a black tuxedo offered. I pulled two flutes from the tray and handed one to my best friend.

  “To the best friend a girl could ever hope for.” I held up my flute.

  “And here’s to wishing my best friend the best birthday ever.” We gently tapped our flutes and sipped. “Come on, let’s go make a loop.” Evin stepped to the left, and I trailed close behind, but before we made it very far, the music cut off.

  “Welcome, everyone, to the hottest New Year’s party in downtown Savannah. It’s great to see all you hot and sexy ladies tonight. And we can’t forget about you handsome gents ready to ring in the New Year.” The host was short and sweet, and after a short cheer from the crowd, the music turned back on.

  “Would you like to dance?” Startled, I turned to find a guy standing behind me. He was handsome, and his deep blue eyes were mesmerizing. One dance wouldn’t hurt anything, right?

  “Sure, but just one. My friend is waiting.”

  The man’s smile widened as he led me to the dance floor. Charlie Puth and Meghan Trainor’s “Marvin Gaye” played, and I hoped I wasn’t yelling when I asked him his name. He twirled me and then led me in a dance that was mostly shuffling our feet from side to side. About halfway through the song, I felt a pinch of guilt for dancing with another man. For his hand on my hip and our hands locked together. I glanced up at my smiling dance partner and quickly apologized before taking off for the ladies’ room.

  “Hey, what happened? Why are you running away?” Evin asked, shutting the door behind her. I hadn’t even realized she was following me.

  I shrugged, and she waited for an answer. “I felt guilty.”

  Her brows pinched, clearly confused. “For what?”

  “For letting another man touch me.”

  Evin’s brows evened out before she shook her head.

  “You did nothing wrong. That guy out there was not touching you inappropriately. You were dancing.” She sighed softly when I refused to meet her eyes. “Addie, it was innocent. Don’t beat yourself up over it, and don’t make it out to be anything more than what it was. Besides, where the hell is that fiancé of yours?”

  “He’s sick.”

  “Sick?” She huffed and rolled her eyes. “I call bullshit.”

  “Yeah, me, too.” I didn’t want to talk about everything going on between Jase and me. “You’re right. It was silly of me to feel guilty for dancing with someone else.”

  “I know.” She smiled wide. “Did you really need the ladies’ room?”

  “I do.”

  She waited outside while I used the restroom, and then we headed back out to the party. We mingled, danced, and sipped champagne until we were both certifiably drunk. Then, the music cut off, and the DJ’s voice took over.

  “All right, you beautiful people, find that special someone—or that someone you’re going home with.” The DJ’s laugh filtered through the speakers. “Fifteen minutes and the fireworks show is about to start.”

  I looked to Evin, who was deep in conversation with someone she just met and took my alcohol‑infused brain and wandered to the edge of the balcony. I stared at the server as he made his rounds, and when he approached, I swiped a flute from his tray.

  “You look absolutely beautiful,” the last person I ever expected to see there said as he came to stand next to me. I didn’t turn to look at him, but I knew he was watching me as I watched the sky, waiting for the fireworks to start.

  The first deafening shot popped, decorating the midnight sky in gold and silver flakes. Another countdown shot cracked pink, red, and silver, and still I refused to turn and look at him.

  “Remember how the fireworks used to light up for us?” His voice came from my left, and it was much closer than I thought he was. I closed my eyes for a second and hesitated before turning, allowing my heart to skip a couple of beats as I took him in.

  Standing there, sexy as sin and dressed to kill in a charcoal colored suit and a black dress shirt unbuttoned at the top, was RJ. He commanded the space around us, his right hand tucked deep in his pants pocket and his left hand holding a flute of champagne inches from his full and kissable lips.

  “You really do look stunning,” he complimented, raising his glass to take a sip. Our eyes met over the rim, and my whole body froze, stuck in a war of what‑ifs. When I didn’t say anything, he lowered the glass and smiled. “Happy Birthday, Addie Mae,” he wished in a gentle voice. I gulped, and a warm feeling came over me. What the hell was I supposed to do? With a mind of their own, my eyes traveled back to his lips. Lips that reminded me of all the wonderful things they had done to my body at one time or another.

  “Thank you.” I barely got the words out before my chest began to feel as if it were caving in. My heart set a punishing rhythm, pounding out beats against my neck.

  Why is he here?

  My reaction to him proved my theory of why I needed to avoid him. Being around him after I’d had a few drinks was just making it worse, and I knew I needed to get away from him. However, running like a scared little girl wouldn’t send the right message, so I gave him a wisp of a smile.

  “So, how are you taking the news?” I blurted, quickly realizing my mistake when his brows pinched and he pinned his stare on me. Doing my best damage control, I tried something else. “Are you here with someone?”

  “Just a friend,” he answered vaguely after a short pause, and a flicker of longing flashed in his eyes. At least that was what made sense to my brain after another flush of warmth flowed easily through me. My cheeks felt warm, and I blinked stupidly, not really knowing how to respond to that.

  The final shot went off, and I jumped but managed not to squeak in surprise. I didn’t need to make more of a fool of myself. I met his eyes, and before I did something utterly stupid, I forced myself to get the hell out of there.

  “Excuse me, I need to find my friend.” I spun around, but RJ stopped me by gently grabbing my elbow.

  “You’re not driving, are you?” he asked when I turned to look at him over my shoulder.

  He was worried about me? What about all those years ago when I needed him and he never called—never gave a damn about my well‑being. About the child we created. It didn’t matter to me that he never knew, I tried calling—I did my part. I even made the effort to drive back home to tell him in person, but he was gone. If no one knew where he took off to, that left me at a dead end, and in my book, he could take the high road and go straight to hell. I jerked my arm out of his hold and glared at him. Then, before I lost my resolve, I walked away from him.

  I wove my way through the couples too lost in their own little bubbles to move out of my damn way. When I finally made it out to the front lobby, I dropped my body into the nearest decorative sofa and sent Evin a text to let her know I was ready to go. I just wanted this night to be over. I could ring in both my birthday and New Year’s in bed, cozy and comfortable, without any risk of running into RJ.

  My hands trembled, and my left knee bounced uncontrollably as Roger, Ty’s dad, delivered the news.

  My best friend was dead.

  Was that why Addie asked me how I was taking the news? How could she not fucking tell me something so consequential? He was my best
friend.

  “How the fuck did this happen?” I whispered into the palms of my hands.

  He can’t be gone, there has to be some kind of mistake.

  My head started to shake again, and I stood abruptly. “How?” I tried to swallow, but my throat felt like it was closing in. “He was just here.” I dried my eyes on the sleeve of my T‑shirt and clenched my fists. “Shit.”

  “Son.” Ty’s dad stood and rested his hand on my shoulder. “I understand this is a shock to you. Hell, it’s a shock to all of us.” He paused for a second, trying to hide the pain in his voice. “But we all knew that was a chance Tyler took choosing this line of work.”

  My head shook violently. “No way, nuh‑uh. This is bullshit.” I dropped back into my seat. My elbows dug into my thighs, and I fisted my hands in my hair. Why? How could this happen? Tyler and Lilly just got married. They had plans, and they were already talking about kids. How could this happen to them? Damn it. This wasn’t right!”

  “RJ . . .” Roger looked past me. His grief was there, etched deep into the lines on his face. I hoped I never found out what it was like to lose a son. If it felt anything like losing someone I considered a brother, I didn’t know if I could live through it.

  “You were always like a son to us—a brother to Tyler, and we hope we won’t lose you, too.”

  He tried his best to force a smile over his frown before tucking his hand into his front pocket, bringing it back out in a fist. “Tyler’s mother and I decided we wanted you to have these.”

  When he uncurled his fingers, Ty’s dog tags came into view. I stared long and hard at the dull metal in his palm. The thought of what those two round-edged rectangles signified had me on the edge of hyperventilating.

  Tremors shot through my arms as I took them from him and read the name over and over again in my head: Gibson, Tyler E. My thumb brushed over the next three lines of raised letters and numbers before I fisted the tags and bowed my head against my knuckles. Only then did I let the tears fall. I sat there, and for the second time in my adult life, I cried, wishing this were all a bad dream, a fucking nightmare—but we both knew that was far from the truth.