Shameless (Loving Fallon Book 1)

by Delecroix, Cassandra

  Nick walks over to me, and I peer back at the motorcycle, noting that he’d left the headlight on so it can shine across the area to give us some light.

  “This is beautiful,” I breathe, inhaling the fresh air.

  “I come out here every so often when I need to clear my head,” he says lightly, his hands slipping into his front jeans pockets.

  It sinks in that he’s brought me here because he thinks I’m troubled and could use someone to talk to. Right now, I’d rather lighten the mood and prove I’m not always the sad, lonely girl that he sees deep within me. “Do you ever swim?” I ask as a naughty idea enters my mind.

  His head turns, and he looks at me. “Here? No.”

  “Why not?”

  “I just never thought to.”

  “So let’s swim,” I suggest. “It’s nice out tonight.”

  Nick’s eyes slide doubtfully to the pond. “I don’t think so.”

  “Is it deep?”

  “If I’ve never gone swimming here, how would I know?”

  “Do you know how to swim?”

  He sighs. “Yes,” he says reluctantly.

  “Good.” I begin stripping off my clothes as Nick stares at me with confusion. My shirt falls to the ground, and I kick off my shoes and start shimmying out of my jeans.

  “What the hell are you doing?” Nick asks. His expression then clears with comprehension. “You can’t be serious.”

  I straighten after nudging my jeans away with my bare feet, and I grin as I reach behind me and unfasten my bra, letting it drop to the ground. The cool air causes my nipples to tighten, and I stand there, hoping my nudity will entice him into having a little fun. He’s so damn sexy, I really want to test him and find out just exactly what he’s up to where I’m concerned.

  Nick’s eyes immediately drop to my bare breasts, and he visibly swallows. “Fallon…”

  “I’d start stripping if I were you.”

  My suggestion has his eyes lifting to meet mine. “Why?”

  “Because I can’t swim. You’ll have to drag me out if it’s too deep.” I let my announcement hover in the air for a second so that he can process it. Then I turn and rush to the water before he can make a grab for me. It looks deep, but I refuse to worry as I jump in. The water closes in over my head, and I immediately sink beneath the surface. My heart is pounding, and it’s a fabulous adrenaline rush. I like how alive I feel in this moment, and I know that Nick will pull me to the surface if he has to.

  My body straightens, and I test to see where the bottom is. I’m pleased to find that my toes can touch the slimy bottom of the pond, and my head breaks the surface. When I look around for Nick, I find that he’s no longer standing where I’d left him. Something splashes in the water to my right, and I turn towards the sound. Nick’s head pops up from the water, and he swims over to me.

  He gets right up in my face, his expression furious in the light projecting from the motorcycle. If looks could kill, I’d be dead three times over by now. “That was stupid, Fallon.”

  It was, and I smile apologetically at him. “Sorry.”

  He swipes his hair out of his face, his body language more than just a little pissed off. “Do you know how to swim at all?” he demands.

  I shake my head as I let my hands drift through the water. It’s chilly, but I don’t mind.

  “Damn it, Fallon. You can’t do shit like that,” Nick bites out.

  He’s genuinely upset, and it has me sobering as I move closer to him. “Hey, I’m not stupid or suicidal,” I assure. “I only did it because you’re here with me. And look, you’re in the pond,” I add triumphantly.

  He sighs and gives me another hard look. “Just when I think I might have you figured out, you do something that catches me off guard.”

  His comment has me peering at him with confusion. “Why would you feel that you need to?”

  “Because I want to,” he says simply.

  “You can have me without figuring me out.”

  He frowns. “Fallon…”

  I step closer to him, reaching out and brushing my fingertips along his abs beneath the water. His rigid muscles tense beneath my touch, and I deliberately trail my hand lower. He’s wearing boxers. “I can make you feel good, Nick,” I whisper seductively as I press my breasts against his chest. “You don’t have to be nice and work your way up to what you really want.” I slip my hand beneath the waistband of his boxers and wrap my hand around his hardening length. He’s quite impressive, and I begin to stoke him as he lets out a low hiss. I work my hand up and down, wanting to seduce him. “You can have me any way you want me,” I murmur.

  His breathing is ragged now. “You have to stop, Fallon.”

  “Mmm, but you like it,” I say, pressing a kiss against the side of his neck. “I’m right here, ready and willing.”

  Nick suddenly grabs my shoulders and physically moves me away from him, causing my hand to release his erection. He immediately lets go of me, and his hands disappear under the water, probably to straighten his boxers.

  I’m struck completely speechless. He really doesn’t want me?

  Nick’s angry now, and he takes a step away from me. I can see the visible tension in the lines of his neck and shoulders, and I watch as he scrubs his hands over his face. “You’d do it too, wouldn’t you?” he asks as his hands drop back into the water.

  “I don’t understand, “I say uncertainly. “You liked what I was doing…”

  “Would you have had sex in this pond without a condom?” he asks flatly.

  Oh… I hadn’t really thought that far ahead. I’d just wanted to prove to myself that all he’s after is sex. I look away, knowing I would have gone ahead with it and worried about the consequences later.

  Nick grabs my chin firmly but gently, so as not to hurt me. “Look at me. How often do you have unprotected sex?”

  I’m beyond humiliated by how this evening is turning out, and I jerk my chin out of his grip, refusing to meet his gaze “Never, okay! This would have been the first time. I wasn’t thinking when I started this!”

  “Why now would you take that chance?” he shoots back.

  “Because I’m trying to figure out what you want from me!” The second the words leave my mouth, I flinch and back further away from him. Now I’ve gone and ruined everything.

  “What do you mean?” Nick asks, and I can feel his attention riveted on me.

  I stare off at the motorcycle still shining its light brightly across the water. I’m not ready for this conversation.

  The water gently stirs around my shoulders as Nick moves closer to me, his hand reaching out and brushing against my bare waist beneath the water. “Talk to me, Fallon.”

  I swallow past the lump that’s developed in my throat. Now the truth will come out, and I’ll know exactly where I stand with him. I need to face the brutal reality, though. After I wipe my emotions off my face, I look at him. “You don’t have to pretend to be my friend.”

  “If I was pretending, I would’ve let you jerk me off and a whole lot more. I would have put my dick first, not you.”

  I can’t help but look at him with complete bewilderment. “Why do you pretend to care?”

  Nick holds my gaze captive, his eyes penetrating mine. “I’m not pretending.”

  “I have nothing to offer you. All I have is my body.”

  He stares at me for a long minute, and even in the shadows, I can see something flashing in his gaze. “Is that really how you see yourself?”

  I turn my head away, staring out into the darkness. “It’s always the same. It’s been that way forever.”

  I’m stunned when Nick draws me into his arms, holding me firmly to his warm chest. There is nothing sexual about his embrace even though my breasts are pressing against his bare skin. “There is so much more to you than just a sexy body,” he murmurs into my ear, his hand running up and down my back in a soothing manner.

  There’s still a little girl inside me somewhere, begging for c
omfort, and I struggle against the urge to burrow into him. “Then why do they all leave?” I ask hollowly.

  “They leave because you’ve got shit taste when it comes to men, excluding myself that is.” He eases back, trying to peer down at me. “Look at me.”

  Very reluctantly, my eyes lift.

  He moves his head closer to mine, his eyes staring directly into my own. “You are sexy as hell, but you’re more than that to me. I see a girl that I really want to get to know. No games, no ulterior motives. I simply want to get to know you.”

  “But I have nothing to give back,” I say, struggling with what he’s trying to tell me. “You give me rides to work, and you spend time with me. How do I return any of that?”

  “Fallon, friendship isn’t about giving or taking. It’s about being there for each other.”

  “But I don’t know how to be there for you like you are for me,” I protest as I begin to shiver. The cold water is beginning to bother me.

  Nick reaches out and briskly runs his warm hands up and down my shoulders, trying to warm me up. “You’ve already been there when I’ve needed you.”

  I blink up at him. “I have? How?”

  “There is nothing specific you’ve done, you just…have been,” he says quietly.

  I know he’s serious, but I don’t understand what he means by it.

  “I think there’s a lot we have to learn about each other, but right now, I’m getting cold,” he says finally.

  “Me too,” I mumble, relieved the odd conversation is ending.

  “Let me take you home.”

  We both carefully make our way to the pond’s edge, and Nick helps me climb out. We put our clothes on, and I shiver against his back the entire way to Catherine’s house. He stops the motorcycle at the corner and shuts it down, and after I ease off it, he swings a leg over and rises to stand in front of me. “Stop assuming I have ulterior motives, alright?”

  I mutely nod.

  “Go inside before you turn into a popsicle.”

  After Nick takes off on his motorcycle, I sneak into my room and ready myself for bed. Then I lie in the darkness as I think over my conversation with Nick. I’ve never come across anyone like him before. I know that he wants me, I can tell by the way he reacts when I am close and touch him. Yet he denies himself what his body wants because he has this notion in his head that I need a friend.

  His offer of friendship has me feeling rattled and off-balance, and I turn onto my side as I think it over. Having a friend would be nice, but friendships don’t always last, either. That, and the sexual tension between us has now become very apparent after I’d tried to seduce him tonight. Wanting him is going to be hard to ignore, and I’m not good at being a friend. I always fail before anything can even start. This entire situation with Nick is going to backfire and hurt me, and yet I’m too curious to see how this is all going to play out. I’m willing to see where it leads, because the connection we have is too strong to ignore, and there’s no way that I’d be able to end whatever is happening between us. I like it too much. I’m willing to go along with what he wants until he grows tired of me.

  Nine

  I’m standing at my bedroom window that faces the corner, watching for Blake. I can just barely see the corner of the street, but I’ll still know when he pulls up to the curb. I’m looking forward to our evening. At least with Blake, I know exactly where I stand with him, and I am anticipating the heady rush of triumph when he loses himself in my arms. Blake is a temptation that I can’t seem to stay away from. Sex is fun when it’s good, and it’s definitely good with him. Tonight is going to be a welcoming distraction since I don’t have to question his intentions. It’s just sex, nothing more.

  My mind shifts to Nick. I hadn’t worked yesterday or today, so I haven’t seen much of him since the pond incident. It’s probably wise to have some time away from him. It’s too easy to get wrapped up in his sweet promises.

  When Blake’s car pulls up at the corner, I open the window and carefully ease my legs over the windowsill. Catherine isn’t home, so I could easily use the front door, but this is quicker. I hurry across the lawn and down the sidewalk towards his car. Before he can climb out to open my door, I slip into the passenger seat.

  Blake gives me a welcoming smile. “Hey.”

  “Hi.”

  He pulls away from the curb and reaches out to turn up the radio. I settle back into my seat and relax as he drives through town. We’re both comfortably quiet until he pulls the car into the garage and we go inside.

  “Are your parent’s home?” I ask as we enter the kitchen. There’s a part of me that wants to start messing around with him here in the kitchen. Blake looks very tempting in the V-neck tee he’s wearing, and it really shows off his toned biceps. He can definitely fill out a shirt, that’s for sure. I enjoy looking at him in it, but I’m also looking forward to taking it off so that I can explore his sexy chest once more. He has the finest chest I’ve ever seen.

  “No, otherwise we wouldn’t be here,” Blake says, answering my question. He pockets his keys and flashes me one of his devastating smiles. “We have the place to ourselves. You want to swim, watch a movie, shoot pool, or play video games? Name your pleasure.”

  I’m momentarily thrown by his question, because the only thing I’m thinking about is sex. Isn’t that why we’re here? But now he wants to do something before we hit the sheets? This is new, but if it’s what he wants, I guess I’m up for it. “Video games sound fun.”

  He gives me the oddest look. “Really?”

  My eyes narrow. “Was it a trick question or something?”

  “No,” he assures with a laugh. “I’ve just never met a girl that likes video games. You’re what I consider a rarity.”

  “I never said I liked them. I said they sound fun,” I correct.

  Blake studies me. “You’ve never played video games before, have you?”

  I shrug.

  “Good God, girl. That’s wrong on so many levels. Let me show you what you’ve been missing.”

  He leads me up to his bedroom, and he opens a large entertainment center to reveal a flat-screen TV. I watch as he begins pulling out controllers. Then he walks over to sit on the floor at the foot of his bed, his back leaning against the edge of the mattress. He pats the carpet beside him, looking up at me expectantly. “C’mon.”

  Feeling like I’ve stepped into an alternate universe, I walk over and sit down next to him, leaning my back against the bed.

  Blake’s eyes meet mine. “If you get bored, don’t hesitate to say something,” he insists.

  “Okay.”

  He’s picked a game that we both can play at the same time, and he first explains how the controllers work before he begins the war game. I sit back and watch as he runs through one battle so that I can see what we’re doing. It doesn’t escape my notice that his eyes have lit up, and he’s playing with enthusiasm. This is clearly something he loves.

  “Is this your favorite game?”

  Blake shakes his head, his eyes never wavering from the TV as his character continues shooting at another player. “Nah, Zelda’s legendary. It’s a one-person game though, so I thought I’d put in Call of Duty so you can play, too. Otherwise, if you don’t like this one, I think I’ve got a couple of racing games we can try.”

  “What’s Zelda?”

  He pauses, and his brown eyes swing towards me incredulously. “You don’t know about Zelda?”

  “No. You’re about to die,” I warn when I glance at the TV and find that he’s nearly dead as someone repeatedly shoots at him.

  Blake’s attention shifts back to the game, and he finds that his character has just died. He sets the controller down and turns on me. “What planet have you been living on if you don’t know about Zelda?” he asks, humor dancing in his gaze.

  I love his teasing attitude, and I’m not about to ruin it by admitting my childhood had sucked. “Obviously not the same one you’ve been living on,” I laugh.
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  “No shit. Screw Call of Duty, I’m going to have you play Zelda instead.” He rises to his feet and walks over to the entertainment center.

  For the next hour, he’s content to talk me through the game, and his warm words of encouragement cause my toes to curl. Spending time with Blake is turning out to be quite fun, and I simply enjoy our time together and the attention he’s giving me.

  “I see you’ve been hanging with Nick Parrish lately,” Blake comments lightly.

  My attention is drawn away from the game as I glance at him. From the odd tone in his voice, he isn’t thrilled over my friendliness with Nick. “He’s been giving me rides to my job,” I explain.

  “I didn’t know you had a job,” he says slowly.

  “Nick works right next door, it’s how we met.” The game is now completely forgotten, and I set aside the controller.

  “So you work at the grill or the candy store?”

  “You know where Nick works?” I ask with interest. I didn’t think they were even aware of each other since they are polar opposites. They definitely don’t hang in the same social settings, so I’d just assumed their paths rarely crossed.

  Blake’s expression promptly shuts down. “We used to be friends.”

  I’d had no idea, and I wonder what had happened. I would have never guessed that those two were once friends. Blake is so laid-back whereas Nick is so intense. “I work at the candy store,” I say in reference to his earlier question. I’d like to ask more about their past friendship, but it’s apparent Blake would prefer not to talk about it.

  “He into you?” Blake asks, his eyes locking on mine.

  “We’re just friends.” That sounded so weird rolling off my tongue.

  Blake doesn’t say anything, and his attention returns to the game we’d momentarily forgotten. We play for a little longer until he stands and stretches, his shirt riding up slightly so I can see the “V” of his hips.

  I stand, rubbing my butt that had grown numb. What an interesting evening this is turning out to be.

  Blake lowers his arms and pats his back pocket, checking that he still has his wallet on him. “I’m hungry. Want to go eat somewhere downtown?” he asks as he looks at me expectantly, waiting for an answer.