Without Hesitation

by CJ Azevedo

  After breakfast, Macie dressed in her new Abby bikini and slipped on a black jersey cover-up. She still didn’t know what they were doing, but Grey had said to start with this, so she did, pairing it with black flip flops and leaving her hair down to sway against her back.

  She arrived at his house just past eight and immediately came to a conclusion as to why he hadn’t called to tell her goodnight like he usually did last night. She knew he was going out for a drink with the guys after he got off work, but when he hadn’t called her by midnight, she tried calling a couple of times and he never answered. She thought for a split second of calling Dec or one of the guys but immediately dismissed the idea, not wanting to involve anyone in their relationship—ever.

  There were a couple extra cars and trucks parked out front and trash lying around. They must have had a heck of a time. Macie tried really hard to remain impassive about it. She didn’t need to be with him all of the time. It was okay for him to party with the guys and her not be there with him. She kept building up her bravado as she approached the front door. She wasn’t going to let a stupid party ruin her perfect day-date.

  The door was unlocked and she let herself into the quiet but very messy house. There was one guy sprawled out on the couch. The kitchen table was covered in plastic cups, half of which were knocked over, liquid spilled out of them. There were bags of chips on the coffee table, the TV was muted on the shopping network. Taking a deep breath, she went in to wake up Grey so she could get him in the shower and hopefully salvage her date.

  She opened his door and stepped into the small foyer of the room closing the door quietly behind her. Greyden was lying on his stomach in only his tight black boxers with one leg sticking out of his comforter, his left arm wrapped above his head and his right bent in front of his face on his pillow. Macie sighed. She couldn’t help it. She loved him dearly and he looked so hot lying there.

  She sat gingerly on the side of the bed, reaching out to stroke his smooth back. He didn’t stir. She scooted a little closer and kissed the outside corner of his eye, then whispered in his ear, “Good morning, Grey.”

  Greyden scrunched up his face and tried to open his eyes. His right hand came over his whole face and rubbed before rolling onto his back and stretching. He grunted with a sexy moan before reaching a hand out to Macie and resting it on her thigh.

  “Good morning, Butterfly. You look beautiful.”

  Macie gave him an appreciative smile, already feeling better about the scene she drove up on as she admired his morning rasp. “Thank you.” She fiddled with his fingers for a few seconds while he just stared at her. “Rough night?”

  Greyden slowly nodded his head. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s okay. I knew you were going out, I just didn’t know it was going to be like this or here or that you weren’t even going to call me, but let’s just move on.” Macie wasn’t going to fight with him today, plus his abs were doing delicious things to her girly parts.

  “Mace, I messed up.” He took in a deep breath and averted his eyes to the ceiling.

  Her stomach turned to knots and she wanted her hand back. She didn’t know what he was going to say but she already didn’t like it, he had a death grip on her hand and wasn’t giving it up.

  “While I was at the bar last night with the guys, my mom called. They thought my dad had a heart attack.” This time he let go of her hand to scrub his head as he sat up in bed, pulling the comforter up to his waist.

  Macie didn’t know what to do or say, she was still fearful. That wasn’t something to “mess up,” so there was something else, but her love for him still had her wanting to console him.

  “I left without saying anything and went straight to the hospital. They had him on all these machines, and were running a bunch of tests, my mom was freaking out.” Greyden shook his head. “Anyway, turns out it wasn’t a heart attack, but they did have to do some kind of emergency surgery on his heart. It took a couple hours. I sat there for like, four hours, and I didn’t call you. Fuck. Why didn’t I call you?” He finally looked at her and she could see that his eyes were rimmed red, his jaw tense.

  Macie wasn’t sure why he didn’t call her, but she loved his parents too and it hurt that it didn’t even cross his mind.

  “Once he was in recovery, I took my mom home and went back to the bar and got ridiculously drunk. There was a group of college kids there and they brought me home. I guess they stayed to party. I don’t remember much after getting back to the house.”

  Macie nodded her head in acknowledgement that she had heard him, not that she understood, but cause she didn’t. She was angry, she just didn’t know how to channel it.

  “I guess I’ll go home and change while you shower. We’ll need to go over and check on your mom this morning, make sure she gets breakfast before we take her to see your dad.” No matter the stupid decisions Grey made, this was her family and she’d make sure to do the right thing in the time of need.

  “All right, I’ll come over as soon as I’m dressed. I really am sorry, Butterfly. We’ll go out as soon as we take my mom back home, okay? I promise our date isn’t ruined, it’s just turned into two days now.” He looked at her with hope-filled eyes, silently asking her to trust him.

  Macie would be able to brush it off. She was disappointed, definitely, but her anger was quickly fading. She leaned in and kissed him right before standing to leave. Just as she grabbed her purse off the floor, his bathroom door opened.

  Macie and Greyden’s heads both snapped over to the direction of the noise.

  The purse in Macie’s hand dropped to the ground, spilling its contents, when a very tall blonde appeared in the doorway in her hot pink bra and matching thong. Her hair was a tangled mess but that didn’t keep Macie from noticing how sexy she looked. Greyden jumped up and stood in front of Macie, as if to protect her from the scene in front of her. Macie was so shocked she couldn’t find the willpower to shove him away. She just stood there, incredulity wracking her brain.

  “What the hell are you doing?” Greyden’s voice was harsh and directed right at the unwanted blonde. Well, she’s unwanted as far as Macie’s concerned.

  “I’m sorry, Grey, I went to the restroom right before she came in. I thought she had left or I would’ve waited longer.”

  “Oh, God!” Macie cried a quiet choke of words.

  Greyden spun around and put his hands on her shoulders as she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Butterfly, I swear I don’t think I—”

  Macie’s hands flew up to stop him. “Don’t call me that. Please don’t taint that right now.” Feeling more anguish and anger by the second, her words flew from her lips in a quiet, heated rush. “Put some pants on.” She looked him square in the eye so he could see all of her contempt for him in that moment.

  After staring at her for a moment, he calmly walked over to his armoire and pulled some basketball shorts out of the drawer. The blonde stood motionless, watching them with her hands on her hips, looking unperturbed and almost comfortable.

  “Why are you just standing there? Where are your damn clothes?” Macie asked the intruding woman, beginning to feel violent. She was silently cursing her mother for raising her with so many manners that always seemed to encompass her at the most inopportune times, like now. Just once, she wanted to be like a guest on Jerry Springer so the nasty words and ugly fists would just come flying freely. Where’s the down and dirty when you need it?

  The trashy blonde’s eyes scanned the bedroom floor while Grey stayed leaning against his armoire. Apparently he was going to let her run this show. Finally the other woman pointed to foot of the bed and Macie walked over and picked up a small piece of fabric. She tossed it to her.

  “Put that on and then leave right now. Try not to wake the other guys, if you can manage. Greyden will be most grateful if you make that possible.”

  Macie turned back to Greyden and found him watching her closely. Even though she could clearly see his eyes were on her, she didn’t w
ant to chance him looking up at the tall, sexy slut behind her. “You can turn around anytime now.” Her words came out with a bite. She was running hot and cold. Her emotions were all over the place, not knowing how to handle this. If he knew she was in bathroom he would have gotten up and taken her out of the room, right? He wouldn’t have sat there and talked to her. Right?

  Greyden walked over to the window, effectively turning his back to the still nameless blonde. Macie turned back to her just as she adjusted the straps to her barely existent dress.

  “Greyden, I—” the girl began, but Macie wasn’t going to stand here and let them chat. That was definitely not going to happen.

  “I think you’ve done enough. You can leave now.” She had to breathe deeply to contain her anger the longer she stayed in the room with the two of them. Ugly images of their night together coursed their way into her head and her heart was starting to actually ache. As much as she was starting to feel, she refused to show any of it in front of this chick.

  Finally, the blonde flicked her tangled hair over her shoulder and stalked out of the room, leaving the door wide open. Macie heard voices down the hall and could only hope it wasn’t any of her guys. If they saw her walking out of Grey’s room, they would kill him and she wasn’t sure yet that’s what she wanted. At this point, she wasn’t sure of anything.

  “I didn’t sleep with her, Mace.”

  “Oh, really? And you know that because you were so lucid last night?”

  She closed the door quietly, locked it, and turned back to see him waiting for her by the bed. “I know that because I could never touch anyone but you, no matter how much I’ve had to drink. I know because I would never do that to you, to us.” He walked closer, standing just an inch or two away now.

  “Then what the fuck was she doing practically naked in your room, Greyden, with her trashy dress on your floor?”

  His hand cupped her jaw as his tensed. “I know you’re upset and I’m sorry, but you need to watch your language, Macie. I didn’t do anything. I see how bad this looks, let’s ask the guys what they know. They were all here all night. Somebody had to have seen her come in here.”

  Macie took in his words carefully, considering each of them. She’d always wanted to keep their business private, never wanting to involve anyone else, especially the guys, but this might be a time where she has to forgo that plan. They might be her only hope at salvaging her respect for the love of her life.

  His tone and expression softened. “Plus, baby, I was way too drunk to have done anything sexual, I swear to you. The guys can back me up on that.”

  She kept staring into his eyes, trying to find any trace of dishonesty, but she found none. Her gut told her the only betrayal he made was not trusting in her to be able to rely on her when he needed it the most.

  “Go take a shower, Greyden, you need to get to your mom.”

  “We, Mace. We need to get to her.”

  Macie shook her head and backed up. “I think I need to go. I’ll go see your dad this afternoon,” she whispered, her voice thick with tears.

  “Fuck that, Macie. I didn’t do anything. You aren’t leaving.” His patience snapped. Shouting as loud as he did, she was certain he woke up the remaining sleeping roommates.

  Macie slipped her new ring off her finger as fresh tears slid down her face. She held it out to him, but he backed up like it was on fire. She could almost see his anger and frustration coming off him like physical heat waves. “I’ve loved you for nearly half my life and you couldn’t call me. You just had to pick up the phone, Grey.” Macie’s voice wavered; she sniffled and wiped the tears from her cheeks with the hand still holding her ring. She set it on his bed and grabbed her purse, shoving all the spilled contents back inside unceremoniously as she continued to sniffle.

  “Don’t.” Greyden’s voice was pained as he pleaded with her.

  She decided not to explain anymore, to just leave it as it was and walk away. Greyden thought he was ready for this, but he clearly wasn’t, and she was just thankful they learned it now.

  “Butterfly, I love you. Please, don’t.” His anguished voice cracked as she walked towards the door, her heart breaking even more at his words. This wasn’t how those words were supposed to be exchanged. Everything was ruined and there was nothing she could do but keep walking and pray she made it to her car.

  A large, fast hand came flying past her head and shoved at the door, slamming it closed right in front of her just as she got it opened. “No! You are not doing this, Macie. I won’t let you walk out on me because some bitch thought she’d be clever.” He folded his thick arms over his heaving chest and stared at her, not budging from his position in front of the door. She wasn’t leaving this room.

  “Greyden, just let me go. We both know that when it came down to it, you didn’t turn to me, you didn’t need me. You’re not there…so don’t force it. Just let me leave and don’t make it worse for me.” Her voice was calm as she picked at her freshly painted fingernails, but she was feeling anything but calm.

  The door flew open and hit Greyden in the back, causing him to stumble forward and arch his back in pain from the knob digging into him before he found his footing again and shoved the door closed with an angry, painful growl. Macie could hear the guys, all three of them, yelling expletives through the door. They were pissed. She was unsure if they saw the girl come from his room or if they heard him yelling at her, but she knew that they knew he’d done something. This was exactly what she was trying to avoid.

  No matter what happened when she walked out of this room, he would always be the love of her life, whatever that meant for their future. She couldn’t let what their relationship was going through affect his friendships with the guys. That had always been important to her. She walked up and grabbed his clenched fist. “Please go get in the shower. Your parents need you right now, Greyden. We can figure this out later.” Tears streamed down her face at a rapid pace and she let them. She was sad, devastated at the demise of her relationship. Her hopes and dreams of the love of her life were combusting right in front of her teary eyes and she knew that she couldn’t fix it right now. This time it’s out of her hands.

  “Fuck no, I’m pissed as hell, Macie. I’m not going anywhere unless you’re going with me.”

  “Greyden! Open the damn door!” Declan growled from the other side as he beat his fist against the wood.

  Macie wiped her face, took a deep breath, and stood straighter. After clearing her throat, she decided to give him what he wanted for now. She could suck it up and go. She definitely didn’t hate him, she wasn’t even mad. Her heart truly believed he didn’t cheat on her. His mistake was putting himself in a situation he didn’t need to be in because he didn’t turn to her in his time of need and that killed her. Macie knew Grey had issues where his parents were concerned that he was still learning to deal with. Among those, the grief of having to lose his future with fighting in exchange for a respectable career, to follow in his father’s footsteps to care for his mom. To worry about losing the man he admired and loved dearly and also watching the stress eat at his loving mother was painful, Macie could tell. Greyden and his parents still hadn’t told anyone but her about his father’s illness and it was beginning to weigh heavily on him. Everyone at his father’s office thought his dad was taking time off, vacationing and giving his son a chance to evolve in the company before he truly retired. They couldn’t be farther from the truth.

  “I’ll go with you,” she relented. “Just go shower, we need to leave. I’m sure your mom’s anxious to go see him.”

  Greyden closed the space between them and wrapped his arms around her tightly, as if he would never let her go. She tried to shut down emotionally, tried to block it all out and just move forward so they could get the day over with and figure out what they needed to do. It didn’t work. She sobbed and sobbed. He caressed the back of her head and shushed her like a father would a small child. She pressed her wet face to his bare chest and let hi
m hold her. Her resolve to be brave and do what she knew needed to be done was broken; it would have to wait.

  The guys didn’t let up their attempts at breaking in and the force against the door only increased when they heard Macie crying. Greyden blocked out the harsh words and blunt hits against his door as he comforted his girl. After just a minute, he walked her over to the bed and spread out the comforter, asking her to lie down and wait for him while he showered. He went to the door to exchange words with the guys on the other side.

  Declan peeked his head in and saw Macie lying on the bed, then backed out without saying a word. The banging and yelling stopped and the room went as silent as midnight out on the beach when Grey reentered. He grabbed a throw blanket from his closet and gently covered her as she rested her throbbing head on his pillow, but not before she threw what was normally her pillow on the ground, the pillow the blonde must have slept on the night before. Macie’s stomach flipped in a continuous loop at just the thought of it.

  “Keegan said Hailey was asleep out on the couch until just a little while ago,” he said softly. “She must’ve come in just before you got here. I swear I didn’t touch her.”

  Macie knew it was true. She could feel it in her heart that he hadn’t betrayed her, besides the fact that her brother wouldn’t have lied, knowing she was in there crying over Grey. Greyden leaned down and kissed her, letting his lips linger for longer than just a chaste kiss. Reminding her. Needing her to feel his love, their connection.

  “Please don’t leave, Butterfly.”

  “I won’t.”

  “Ever.”

  “Grey.”

  “I need a nickname right now, Butterfly.” Greyden’s voice sounded tortured.

  “You hate my nicknames.”

  “I love everything about you. Even your stupid nicknames.”

  Macie’s eyes widened as she took in his words. This time the three-ish words weren’t under duress and he was looking at her like she was his everything.