Perchance

by Lila Felix

  He set the alarm on his phone and he got into the bed first. I kicked off my shoes and got in after him, his eyes on me the entire time. I smiled at him and laid down on the arm that I assumed was out for me. He reached around my waist and pulled me closer to him and left his hand there.

  “Let me hear it one more time, Pistol.” He whispered in my ear.

  “I love you Cooper.” I whispered back to him and put one of my feet in between his calves.

  “I love you Remi. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”

  And within seconds his breathing was heavy and I relaxed and drifted off.

  It seemed like I was only asleep for seconds. His alarm was going off and I reached to turn it off. He was still asleep. I kissed him lightly on the lips and he smiled.

  “Waking up without that is gonna suck from now on.” I giggled and he hugged me back to him.

  “OK, I gotta get home. You don’t have to get up. Just sleep.”

  “No, I’m up, I’m going.”

  He walked me home. He kissed me on my forehead and then walked back. I told him to text me when he got there.

  I tiptoed in but it was in vain because Aunt Brenda was sitting at the table.

  “Well?” She said with a big smile on her face as she caressed her cup of coffee.

  “He still loves me and I still love him and everybody knows.”

  She hugged me and said, “I’m so glad for you. Now get your lovey dovey butt to bed.”

  We both went to our rooms and I got a text.

  Cooper: Home, but u’ve spoiled me now. Have to sleep all alone.

  Me: Sorry. Goodnight Cooper.

  Cooper: Goodnight love.

  It was almost midnight and I went to sleep immediately.

  The rest of the week as much as I tried to make it not be was just a countdown to seeing him again on Saturday and especially Sunday. We talked every night after I finished my work but I have to admit that sometimes it was before. He and his Dad went to Baton Rouge for the day on Saturday and I spent it at the library catching up.

  Sunday morning Aunt Brenda and I went to church and sat in our regular pew in the middle on the right side. And to my surprise and joy, we were joined by Eric, Cooper, Troy and his Dad. Halfway through the sermon Cooper opened his hand on his lap and my hand slid into his. Aunt Brenda gently pinched my elbow letting me know that she was well aware of what was going on and I spent the rest of the church service with a full blush. Certainly there was some rule about blushing about your boyfriend in church, but I couldn’t control it to save my life.

  Troy, Josie and I met at Cooper’s house about two and we drove to the Myrtles. It was packed. Even the Blonde Squad was there and that Pippy one waved at me. Cooper and Troy were getting our tickets. Then she started walking towards us.

  “Oh Lordy, here we go.” I groaned at Josie.

  “Um, this may or may not be my fault.” She said sheepishly.

  “What?” I said.

  “She overheard Troy and I talking about it in fifth period the other day.”

  “Hey there…you.” I know this wench remembers my name.

  “Hi Chrissie. How are you?”

  She looked behind me and gave a big fake smile. “I’m better now.”

  I looked behind me and Cooper was approaching. I wanted to punch her so hard that her hair would turn red and fall out.

  “Hey, Cooper.” She always drug out the ‘ooo’. Like she was making cow noises without the ‘M’.

  He wrapped his arms around my waist and nodded to her.

  “Are you ready to go in Remi?” He asked into my ear and his mouth stayed near my ear way longer than was necessary. Then he kissed my neck under my earlobe and going into a haunted plantation was the last thing on my mind.

  “Yeah. Let’s go.” I answered him and the four of us walked away from a fuming blonde.

  We didn’t see anything, but every other tourist swore that they saw shadows or a woman walking the grounds.

  We ate at the restaurant on the grounds and then Cooper let Troy drive the Cuda. I thought that boy was going to have a coronary.

  Cooper and I sat in the back seat and we got as close as two people could get for the short ride home. We dropped off Troy and Josie and then Cooper went extra slow taking me home. We pulled into the driveway and he turned off the engine.

  “I wanna kiss you so bad.” He whispered without even looking at me, like he was trying to restrain himself.

  “You have no idea.” I whispered back to him. “I’m just gonna get out. Call me when you get home.”

  “No, I’m walking you to the door. I’m gonna milk this for all it’s worth.”

  We held hands all the way to the door and he grabbed me by the waist. I, almost desperately, put my arms around his neck. I almost cried with the need for more time with him. More time with his arms around me. More time with him.

  “Let me take you out on Friday Remi, just me and you. I want you all to myself. I’m starved for time with you.”

  “You’ve been with me all day.” I was breathless just hearing him talk about being starved for me. I was certainly starved for him.

  “I know but I can’t kiss you like I want to when there’s other people in the front seat.” He chuckled in my ear and I could feel the vibration of it all the way to the ends of each strand of hair.

  “That’s true. I wanted to pull you into one of those empty bedrooms and kiss you so badly.”

  He pulled back and looked at me like he was shocked.

  “Oh, we are going to have to go back there so you can do that. I wouldn’t want to deprive you of the opportunity.”

  I laughed so hard at that. I felt so comfortable saying anything and everything in front of him. Nothing was embarrassing around him.

  “Well, if we’re revisiting missed opportunities, we’re going to have to spend a good deal of time in the Cuda.”

  “You did not just talk about making out in my car. Now I’m never leaving.”

  “So what’d you have in mind for Friday?”

  “Something fun. It’s getting a little cool out. Camping?”

  “In the woods? With bears?”

  “Oh boy, no, with me. And we can invite Troy and Josie. I think they’re back together. I can’t ever tell.”

  “Um, ok? Sounds good. I think.”

  He laughed at my fear of camping and then the front porch light came on.

  We both started laughing and Aunt Brenda appeared in the front door.

  “Alright you two. School is in the morning for both of you and you…” she pointed at Cooper, “have a test on that book that you hate so much. Two more minutes, ok?”

  “Ok” we agreed in unison.

  “Are you gonna kiss me or leave these lips hanging?” He asked.

  We met in the middle and our lips met for just a moment. He turned and opened the door and made a gesture for me to go in.

  “Text me when you get home.” I said.

  “Yup.” He bounced down the stairs and into his car and drove off.

  I went in and thanked Aunt Brenda for keeping me in line and she giggled and shook her head at me.

  I got showered and went to bed. I rolled over and plugged in my phone and noticed a missed text message.

  Cooper: I forgot something.

  Me: What?

  Cooper: I forgot to tell you that I love you.

  Me: I forgot too.

  Cooper: Hmmmm….

  Me: ???

  I got no answer and it scared the crud out of me. There was just no telling what he was conjuring up.

  The next day, I had made my way across the cafeteria and had my hand on the handle of the door leading the way out to our tree.

  “Remi!” Someone was screaming my name and I just rolled my eyes because I almost knew what was coming next…The Grand Gesture.

  I turned around already completely beet red from the tip of my head all the way down.

  He was on the other side of the cafet
eria with a big bunch of flowers in his hand.

  “With these fine cafeteria people as my witnesses I want you to know that I love you with all of my heart.”

  The guys laughed and the girls said ‘awww’.

  There was only one thing to do.

  “And I love you right back Cooper Neal.” I yelled back at him.

  There was round of applause as he approached me still shaking my head at him.

  He lifted me up and kissed me in front of everyone.

  He beamed as he said “Grand Gesture”.

  I laughed back at him, “Yeah, I remember.”

  Cooper

  I waited impatiently for Friday. Troy and I decided to handle all of the tents and big stuff while the girls handled the food. It ended up being freezing and Troy challenged me to a fire build off. No matches or lighters were allowed. The first person who built a fire with no help got the best tent. Remi and Josie showed up right before the challenge and we built fires about ten feet from one another.

  I gathered my wood fast, picking dry wood and some leaves and pine straw for a starter. I got out my knife and flint and after piling my wood just so, began hitting my knife against the flint creating sparks and within minutes had a flame and then a fire. Poor Troy was still gathering wood when he came back to my full fire roaring.

  “Dude, what are you a boy scout or something?” Troy gaped at me.

  “Actually, I’m an Eagle Scout.” I nodded my head in a ‘take that’ motion.

  “I should’ve known. You act like an Eagle Scout.” He joked.

  “Here, let’s go build yours, amateur.” I laughed back at him.

  I taught him how to build a good fire while the girls whispered and giggled about something. There were several things I intended to find out tonight about my Pistol and finding out what they were giggling about became one of them.

  I didn’t miss the look on Remi’s face when she found out that we would be sharing a tent. We cooked hot dogs and S’mores over my fire, because Troy had almost let his go out. I built it back up for him. Troy and Josie went back and forth telling ghost stories that weren’t scary at all. And they way Troy told them, they were more funny than anything.

  Josie let out an exaggerated yawn and stretched her arms out wide. Troy apparently got the hint and they went into their tent. I was glad they made their campsite a ways away.

  “Are you cold?” I asked Remi.

  “No, not at all. You’re warm and that fire is awesome.” She snuggled in closer under my arm.

  “Question?” I prodded.

  “Yeah?” She looked up at me.

  “What were you two giggling about when I was helping Troy make his fire?”

  She pressed her face against my chest and giggled some more.

  “Well, I said that Eagle Scouts are hot. And Josie agreed and said that she wishes Troy was an Eagle Scout because they are always prepared.”

  “Well, I’m glad I brought my uniform then.”

  She slapped my thigh, “You did not!”

  “Well, I would’ve if I had known, jeez.”

  She yawned and we decided to go into the tent. We laid side by side as close as two sleeping bags can get and I thought she was content.

  “Can’t we zip these two sleeping bags together? Tuesday and I used to do that to keep warm.”

  “Yeah, we can if you want.” I couldn’t believe my ears.

  “I do. I’m freezing again.”

  “OK.”

  I zipped our bags together while she shivered in the corner of the tent. We got settled again, face to face in one big sleeping bag and I held her close to me to keep her warm and . I was looking at her face just studying her when she spoke up.

  “You want to ask me something else. I can see it on your face.”

  “I do.”

  “Well shoot.”

  “You’ll think I’m a stalker.” I laughed.

  “Um, no, I walked by your house fifty three times before we started school. I’m the stalker.”

  “Dang, I wish I had seen you. Ok, so, one time we were in church and it was the benediction prayer and you were saying your own words and when everyone else said ‘Amen’ you kept your eyes closed and then later opened them and said ‘Amen.’”

  “And you want to know what I prayed for? She looked confused.

  “Yeah, I know, it sounds awful when it’s said out loud.”

  “No, it’s fine. I prayed that I could do both. Keep my goals and resolve and…”

  “And what?”

  “And be with you.” She whispered.

  “Prayer answered. You’re doing great in school.”

  “And you’re here and I love you.”

  “And you’re here and I love you more every day.”

  I pulled her even closer to me and we fell asleep on that cold night, in the cold tent but we weren’t cold for even one minute.

  “““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““““`

  She was under my skin like an IV. The needle was in and the bag was hooked up but what was pumping into me was addictive and when it entered my veins it washed over me like a warm blanket. When I was with her I could push the button on my own personal pump and get a fix. And when she wasn’t my pump was stripped from me. The needle was still in and I could still feel the effects from my last dose, but I needed more. And I couldn’t rest, couldn’t think of anything else until I was in her presence once more.

  School didn’t suck anymore. It was a place where I saw Remi. But it had evolved into something more for me and I didn’t realize it until one day surrounded by homework in my tiny above garage apartment that she wasn’t the only one who was working hard. I was getting better at school and my grades were better than they ever had been. Not only did I want her to do well in school so she could support herself, but I wanted to do well in school so that I could do well for her and for me.

  I wasn’t going to say the word out loud in fear that I would repeat it. But I knew what I wanted. I knew what I wanted short term and as I sat here in the midst of books and college brochures I knew what I wanted long term. And in every scenario I thought up, it was us together, college together, house together…and I wasn’t going to admit to the rest.

  She made me want to be better and successful so that we could be those things together. Because I didn’t doubt for one minute that she could do anything she wanted to do by herself. I was the one trying to keep up with her.

  We went out together every chance we got. I kissed her every chance I got. She teased me and taunted me and drove me wild.

  We were nearing Christmas. I had already bought her two gifts. One was going to be opened on Christmas Eve night which she had agreed to spend with Eric and I and my Mom was flying in three days before. The other present I wanted to give her on Christmas day when we were alone.

  I stopped my studying for the night and was wrapping her present when there was a knock on the door.

  I hid the presents and the wrapping paper quickly in the closet and opened the door.

  “I heard a lot of rustling in there. Were you hiding your girlfriend in the closet?”

  She was giggling and I rolled my eyes at her silliness and dragged her to me.

  I shut the door behind her and crushed her between it and my weight and kissed her until my weight was the only thing holding her up. Her fingers had found the belt loops on my jeans. She had melted into me and the sounds coming from her mouth cued me that it was time to back off.

  “Can you stand up or should I stay right here?” I laughed as I asked the question with my forehead touching hers.

  “If I say no will you kiss me again?” She was so bold about our relationship now. She wasn’t shy about anything around me and I reveled in it. She trusted me.

  “You’re killin’ me woman.” I chuckled at her and we moved away even though everything in my body screamed at me to keep her pinned to t
hat door until she told me to stop.

  She stayed a little bit longer and then I walked her back home. It was almost a nightly ritual now.

  I got back home and pulled everything back out to wrap her present. Eric came in to help me.

  Eric and I had come to have a good relationship. Mom had convinced me that he had changed and said that he had even apologized to her more than once. I had almost called him Dad several times, but not quite.

  He saw one of my gifts and picked it up and examined it.

  “It’s not what you think it is.” I defended before he got a chance.

  “It sure looks like it.” He said. “Son, you know what happened with her parents. Be careful.”

  “I am.”

  “Well, that’s a nice looking laptop. How much did it set you back?” He was changing the subject before we argued. He knew everything about Remi and I because my grandma Edith made me spill my guts about her every time we went to visit and he was always there. She always had some wise advice to give me and it always made Remi and me better.

  “It was five hundred. I’ve been saving my money that you pay me from the flea market and I still had some money in savings for the other present.”

  “She’s really going to like the computer. It will be good for her in college. Has she decided where she’s going?”

  I shook my head. “She has applications everywhere. But I really wish she would just go to Baton Rouge Community College until we can get into LSU. It’s closer and cheaper.”

  “And you would be together.”

  “And that.” I agreed. Of course I wanted us to be together.

  “Ok, I’m going to bed, Son. Have a good night. Get to bed soon, ok?”

  “Yes sir. I will.”

  I finished wrapping the laptop and the other present had its own bag. They both went back in the closet with the other presents for Eric, Mom, Remi’s aunt and my grandma Edith. I had already given Troy his gift. Every DVD which starred Adam Sandler.

  Remi

  The semester was almost over and my grades were good. I had applied to several colleges both in Louisiana and in Texas. I didn’t really want to go away, but I had to do what I had to do. I had proven to myself this semester that I could get good grades and I could bust my butt at school. Cooper had been busting his butt too. He was more determined than ever to be an engineer and I was proud of him. He had kept his word. He always made sure that we both got our studying done first and then we could spend time together.