Light Within Me

by Fall, Carly

  And a fierce recognition raced through his body.

  He wanted her.

  He reminded himself that he had to make things right between them. He had to tell her that he was willing to give himself up so that he could fully love her with his mind, as well as his body.

  If she would have him.

  It took her almost being killed by a Colonist for him to realize just how short life was, especially for her. And Hudson’s little speech in the desert that night had rung true. His duty here on Earth was never ending. There were more Colonists. Their offspring had to be investigated, all down the family tree. The thought made his brain ache.

  And where did that leave him? A guy up to his elbows in dead bodies, with no end in sight. Since he had been hanging out with Abby, he also realized how lonely he had been. He had been longing for the connection that he shared with Abby. It wasn’t just physical, but an emotional and psychic connection that was so strong, and it brought him to his knees when he thought about it.

  So, yes. He was ready to give up everything for her. Including his inner being, his longevity, not to mention the anger and revenge that had driven him for so long. He could do without the anger and revenge. He was ready to replace those with good things. But what would that do to his effectiveness in the job? He couldn’t imagine functioning without those feelings coursing through him. He guessed he would have to see how his job performance was affected.

  If she would have him.

  He thought about the fact that she might not want him. That would hurt, and he imagined it would hurt in a way that would make him wish someone had stabbed him multiple times because that would be less painful.

  Cohen was talking about breaking out into teams to do battle on the velvet table, with Abby on his team, of course. Noah knew that he needed to interfere if he was going to get time with Abby anytime soon.

  He walked over and placed his hand on her lower back. She looked up at him questioningly, and he leaned down, his voice low. “I need to talk to you,” he said.

  She nodded, and moved to put her cue away, the wall of Warriors parting for her.

  “Noah? What the hell, man? Really? She agreed to be on my team!” Noah looked at Cohen and couldn’t believe the male sounded like he was two steps away from whining.

  “I need to talk to her. Privately. You guys are going to have to play by yourselves. As pathetic as it may be . . .”

  He moved through them and took Abby’s hand.

  He was tired of being cooped up in the silo and wanted fresh air. They made their way up the metal stairs in silence. He punched in the code to open the first door, and then the second. A blast of springtime desert air hit his face. He inhaled deeply, taking in the dry air tinged with the warm promises of desert sagebrush bloom. The sky above them was clear, the stars twinkling like diamonds settled on black velvet.

  They walked for a bit, staying within the silo’s compound. Noah scanned the area, always on alert, but with Abby by his side, he supposed he was hyper-vigilant. He wanted to be certain nothing, or no one, would hurt her.

  When they had lived among regular people, a couple of the Colonists had banned together and attacked. It had been a blood battle, and the Warriors, having been caught completely off guard, had been lucky to survive. Shortly after that, Noah had bought the missile silos. They were safe, secure, and built like a fortress, as it should be. They hadn’t had any problems with the Colonists since they’d moved in.

  But vigilance coursed through his blood, and his eyes scanned the fence line and the area beyond.

  After walking in silence for a few minutes, Abby stopped and turned to him. “What’s going on, Noah.” It wasn’t a question.

  Well, here you go, buddy.

  “I want to be with you,” he said quietly, the glow of his orange eyes bathing her in their warmth.

  Before he had finished the sentence, she shook her head back and forth slowly.

  “Noah, this isn’t going to happen. You’ve made yourself very clear, and I understand. Your mission is important. There are too many people dying because of the Colonists. Humans have enough of their own sociopaths, and we don’t need yours as well. You and the rest of the guys are doing a noble thing.”

  He didn’t really give a shit about being noble. He was done with noble. Noble had gotten him nowhere except in a pile of misery that he hadn’t realized the depth of until he met Abby.

  He cared about being happy. Abby made him happy, and he wanted to be with her for as long as possible.

  He took a deep breath, and let the words fly. “Abby, I love you. I want to give all of myself to you. If you would have me, I would make you my lovren, my mate. I want to grow old with you.”

  He watched as her eyes widened, and her jaw hung loose. She remained silent.

  Noah put his hand on her shoulders and said, “I never knew how miserable I was until I found you.” He pulled her to him. She resisted for a just a second, but then let herself be engulfed in his arms, her cheek resting against the expanse of his chest.

  “Noah, you can’t do that,” she said quietly.

  He had to laugh. “Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do, woman. I tell you I love you, and you think you’re in charge?”

  He felt her arms snake around his waist. They stood in silence, listening to the desert sounds. Rabbits and lizards scurried about; a coyote gave a lonely howl in the distance.

  “Will you let me love you, Abby?” His heart was doing double time, and a sheen of sweat broke out on his brow. What if she said no? What if she told him to go to hell? He would be devastated, and he felt an ache in his heart at just the prospect of her telling him no. If she said no, he was afraid of what he would become. A male of his species without the female he loved was about as alive as a rock.

  She tilted her head and searched his face. He could see the indecision in her eyes, her brow creased with uncertainty. After a moment, which seemed like a lifetime, he could tell that she had reached a decision. The furrow in her brow relaxed and she smiled slightly. Then she nodded slowly, and Noah felt his heart calm, and his world shifted into a new phase of light and hope, replacing the dark and bleak he had been living in for so long. He put his mouth gently to hers.

  He pulled away, his breath catching at the feelings he allowed to course through him. He felt . . . freedom. It was a freedom of his job, a freedom of the boundaries he had encased himself in.

  They slowly walked arm-in-arm back toward the missile silo. As he punched in the code for the first door on the keypad, Abby said, “I think I need to know that code.” He smiled and told her the numbers needed for access.

  They went down the metal stairs, their footsteps echoing lightly. When they reached the second keypad, Noah couldn’t hold back. He pressed her against the wall with his body, his hand on the side of her neck holding her in place as he kissed her hungrily.

  When he was certain he was glowing, when he felt the incredible pleasure Abby gave him, he stopped and looked down at her.

  “Do you want to go play pool with the boys?”

  “No,” she said breathily, “I want to go play with you.”

  Chapter 45

  Noah made sure the elevator didn’t stop on the way down to his floor. He didn’t want to be interrupted, and he found himself wondering once again why in the hell he had chosen the bottom floor of the silo as his quarters. The elevator seemed to be in slow motion.

  By the time they made it to his floor, he had one arm out of his shirt, and the other arm still trapped in the shirt. He had resisted from tearing hers to shreds, reminding himself that they weren’t the only ones who lived in the silo. Although, the chances of them running into any of the other Warriors, not to mention her newfound father, were slim, but he wasn’t ready to roll that dice.

  When they were finally locked in his quarters, it was a whole different story. He slammed the door and drove them to the bed. As her back hit the comforter, he took her shirt in his hands and ripped it down the mid
dle.

  The heat in his body consumed him. He couldn’t think about anything except putting his skin next to hers, to give himself over to her wholly.

  He had her naked within seconds, most of her clothes destroyed around him. As he loomed above her, his heart pumped in anticipation. He shucked his pants and boots, and he couldn’t take his eyes off her. Her auburn hair spread out around her, her large brown eyes watching his movements, a small smile playing on her face. The pale skin of her curves glowed in the light of the room.

  When he finally got rid of all the annoying clothes that encased his body, he gently laid down on top of Abby, careful not to put his full weight on her. He was hit with the realization that he had never made love to a woman in human form. The joinings on SR44 were a whole different ballgame than what he was about to do.

  Shit.

  Uncertainly raked through him.

  “Noah, what is it?” Abby asked. He guessed she had felt his brief hesitancy.

  “Um . . . I’ve never . . . this is . . . well . . .” Embarrassing? Awkward? A real moment killer? Wasn’t he just the fucking wordsmith.

  Abby looked confused for a brief moment, and then she was able to read between the lines. “Oh,” she said. Silence filled the room, and then she smiled warmly at him. “Well, let me show you, Noah.” She kissed him deeply. “I think you’re going to be really, really good at this,” she whispered in his ear.

  His inner thug with the ego demanded that he take the lead on this one, but the more sensible side of him took over. Better to learn and get it right then to forge onward and screw it all up.

  He rolled to his back as she straddled his hips, and he felt her soft, wet core against his hard length, sending energy rippling through his body. She bent down to kiss him, their chests and abdomens meeting skin-to-skin, and his SR44 form began to vibrate within his human body.

  He relished the feeling of her kiss and the heat of desire it set coursing through his body. As if he could take anymore. His skin had a sheen of sweat, and his heart felt like it was going to pound out the front his chest.

  He watched as she broke the kiss and put her hand on his erection. She gently stroked him for a few moments, which made him feel like his eyes would cross. She then stood him up and slid down until he was fully encompassed.

  His eyes grew wide at the sensation. Being inside Abby was the most beautiful feeling he had ever experienced. Wet velvet. A silk fist. Warmth. Home. His eyes went down to where their bodies joined, and he marveled as she rocked on him gently.

  He watched her hips move, and his gaze traveled up to her flat stomach, her ribcage, to her breasts. On impulse, he reached out and brushed his thumbs over the nipples, and she groaned.

  She planted her hands on his chest and closed her eyes. She began to rock harder, sending shockwaves through his body, all of them ending up at the tip of his cock. By the way he felt, he was pretty sure he was close to having an orgasm.

  As he watched her, his heart beat in double time, his love for Abby almost painful. He let the feeling wash through him, giving himself over totally to the experience.

  He looked at his skin and noticed the glow. He knew his SR44 form wouldn’t be around much longer, and he was so okay with it. If making love to Abby felt like this, he would gladly let his SR44 form go and tell it not to let the door hit it in the ass. The pleasure rippling through him, combined with the vibration of his SR44 form getting ready to leave his body, made him wonder if he would come out of the experience with his brain intact. The physical sensations were almost too much to handle.

  The orgasm came quickly, hitting him in the base of his spine, and sending his hips off the mattress deeper into Abby. He closed his eyes, gasped, and let out a moan as the waves of pleasure rolled through him. His SR44 form vibrated with intensity. As the last blast of the orgasm bucked him, he felt the final vibrations as his SR44 form left his body, and he watched it shimmer just above his skin. He looked up at Abby to see the most incredible thing he had ever laid eyes on.

  Abby was a woman undone. Her head was thrown back, her auburn hair cascading down around her shoulders. She had moved her hands from his chest and grabbed his lower legs, causing her body to arch. Her movements were raw and sensual, a woman who knew what she wanted and was determined to get it. Her breasts swayed as her breath rasped in and out of her mouth. He felt her walls go tight around him, and as she came saying his name, the room lit up with a burst of light. Noah thought for a moment that one of the Warriors had come into the room, but then he realized that the light was coming from Abby.

  The white light shone around her skin, just as his SR44 form did. He watched as she experienced the last tremors of her orgasm, the light radiating out from her, almost blinding him. He saw the glow from her shimmer outward, trapping his SR44 form that hovered above his body. After a few seconds, he felt his SR44 form return to his body. The damn thing had moved back in.

  Huh.

  Noah had no idea what the hell just happened. Well, he knew that they had mind-blowing sex and he definitely wanted more, but Abby was glowing white, and his SR44 form was trapped by her glow.

  He didn’t know what to think.

  The whole thing was just fucking surreal.

  He still had his SR44 form. And holy shit, he had finally gotten something he wanted. He wanted Abby, and he wanted his SR44 to stay intact. The outcome he wanted had come to be, and there hadn’t been any compromise on his part.

  He pretty much liked that. A lot.

  He didn’t know if his SR44 form would continue to stick around, but going on what he knew now, as long as he kept Abby happy in bed . . . explodingly happy . . . then his SR44 form would stick around because it would be trapped by her flash. Or glow. Whatever.

  A slow smiled crept across his face as he thought of the work he would have to do to keep Abby “explodingly” happy in bed. He didn’t even care if that wasn’t a word. And he couldn’t imagine a job with better pay or benefits.

  He listened to Abby’s heavy breathing, and she laid herself down on his chest. He gently caressed her back as he watched the light radiating off her begin to fade slightly. After a moment, she looked up at him and smiled.

  The center of her eyes glowed like stars in the sky, like diamonds. A piercing white light radiated from them.

  She kissed him deeply, obviously unaware of what was happening with her body.

  “Abby,” he said, “I think you need—”

  “Shhhh,” she said quietly. “We don’t need to think. We need to do that again.”

  He thought about saying the hell with the whole glowing thing, but decided that hey, her skin was shimmering like bright moonlight on a dark lake, and she needed to know. He realized that might be the end of the sex, which would be a terrible disappointment, but he cared about her too much to remain silent.

  He slowly and reluctantly lifted her off. With her protests, he picked her up and brought her to the full-length mirror in the bathroom. As he set her down in front of him, he watched her eyes widen in shock.

  “What’s happened to me?” she whispered as she touched her reflection in the mirror, meeting the white eyes staring back at her, tracing the slight shimmer on her skin.

  “I don’t know, Abby.” He explained his theories: She was part SR44, and maybe that part was coming to the surface. Perhaps Cohen’s healing had triggered it. He told her how he had lost his SR44 form, but her light had stopped it from evaporating. “How do you feel?”

  She closed her eyes, as if she were concentrating very hard. “I feel really good,” she said, opening her eyes, smiling at him in the mirror’s reflection.

  He put his big arms around her, and she leaned back into his chest. He kissed her neck, tickling her earlobe with his tongue.

  “Are you sure?” he asked, running his hands over her breasts, down her ribs, and resting them on her hips.

  “I’m positive,” she said.

  Noah turned her around and kissed her deeply, feeling his body
come alive with flames licking him from the inside out.

  He picked her up easily, bringing her legs around his waist, and leaning her up against the wall of the bathroom. He bent to kiss her breasts, his tongue playing with the hard bud.

  Noah heard Abby gasp, felt her hand tightening in his hair. “Noah, please . . .”

  “Please what, Abby?”

  She met his eyes. “Please make love to me.”

  He smiled, positioning himself to enter her. Oh, hell yeah. He could totally do that.

  Chapter 46

  Abby woke in the early morning hours expecting to feel a wall of man spooned around her, but instead she felt empty space. She reached to the other side of the bed and felt nothing but cold sheets.

  How unromantic.

  She stretched, feeling sore in all the right places. She loved the slight pain that radiated throughout parts of her body and the memories it brought.

  After the session up against the wall in the bathroom, they had ended up on the floor. She felt the rug burns on her backside.

  After that, they had ended up in the huge Jacuzzi tub, her sitting between his legs, the warm water and white bubbles lapping at her breasts. They talked quietly about her newfound glow, which seemed to happen each time she had an orgasm. The light that burst from her was almost blinding. Based on the way she felt, she convinced Noah that it wasn’t anything to worry about. She felt alive. Whole. Like she now had the piece of her genetic makeup she had been missing. She felt energy coursing through her body. She felt strong, healthy, and invigorated. In fact, she couldn’t remember a time when she had felt better, both physically and mentally.

  However, she had been caught up in the moment and decided she would pay Cohen a visit today. It was today, right?

  She opened her eyes and looked at the clock. Yes, daytime.

  She rolled over again, put her feet to the floor, and made her way to the bathroom. As she splashed water on her face, she wondered where Noah had gone at such an early hour, and decided she would go find him. As her stomach howled, she amended her mission to get some food and then find Noah. She pulled on a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt and made her way to accomplish her mission.