Foolish

by Anna Black

  “Good,” she said and kissed him. “And you need to take off that goofy-looking hat.” She laughed.

  “Man, don’t hate. I look good in this hat.” He followed her back into the kitchen.

  During the party, Tracy tried not to watch November’s every move, but it was hard. He was used to observing men who talked to his wife to make sure there was nothing fishy going on. It was hard for him to do otherwise, but he managed.

  Before, he’d made sure he stood within earshot of any conversation she carried on with someone of the opposite sex. Now, he was learning to control that urge. Every man at his son’s party was from the dealership or the towing companies, and they were with their wives and kids, but he still had to fight to keep his mind positive.

  The evening progressed, and the children got restless and cranky. Soon it was time for people to start leaving. After all the children were gone, a couple of childless adults were still there. Tracy went up to get TJ ready for bed and November went to the kitchen to get more drinks for their remaining guests.

  “Hey, November, what do you need me to grab?” Jonathan said.

  “Oh, I got it, Jonathan. I think I can manage.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes. Unless you wanna grab those glasses for me.”

  “Sure,” he said, putting them on a tray. “Before I forget, I tried calling you back a couple weeks ago. You had left a message on my voice mail about looking at some office spaces?”

  Tracy walked in. “Hey, what’s up?” he asked with a brow raised. November knew that look. She was sure Jonathan knew it too.

  “Nothing, baby. Jonathan just came to give me a hand with the drinks,” she said, not addressing Jonathan’s question about the call.

  “Yeah, I came to give her a hand,” he said. He grabbed the tray and went back into the living room. She thanked God he hadn’t said anything, but she knew that didn’t settle right with Tracy.

  They went back to their guests, but November could tell Tracy was upset. She hated that he had come in on her alone in the kitchen with Jonathan of all people.

  As soon as they locked the door after their last guest, she turned to him to give him a hug, but he backed up.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked. Here we go.

  “You tell me,” he said sharply.

  “I can’t read your mind, Tracy. What’s wrong?”

  “What was going on in the kitchen with you and Jonathan?”

  “Nothing, Tracy. What do you think was going on?”

  “I’m asking you straight up instead of drawing conclusions, and I would like for you to tell me the truth.”

  “I am telling you the truth. I would never disrespect you that way. Not with your friend and not in our home.” She then saw the tension leave his body. He relaxed a bit, and his jaw loosened. She breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Look, I’m sorry, and I believe you. It’s just when I walked in, you looked like I walked in on something you didn’t want me to hear. Now, Dr. Warner has told me to confront the issues and ask questions instead of drawing my own conclusions, and I just wanted to know. You say it was nothing then, okay, I believe you.”

  November was impressed. They were making progress. “Thank you,” she said and kissed him.

  “I love you,” he said. He hugged her.

  “I love you, too.”

  Chapter Thirty-two

  “Tracy, you check it. I’m too nervous to look,” November said.

  He got up off the side of the tub, went to the sink, and picked up the stick. “It says pregnant,” he said nonchalantly.

  “No way,” she said. She gave a little squeal.

  “Yes way. See?” He showed it to her, and she screamed. “So, I take it you’re happy?”

  “And I’ll say you are correct, big daddy,” she said, and he hugged her.

  “Aww, man, another baby boy coming our way.” He smiled.

  “Man, what are you talking about? This one is going to be a girl.”

  “I doubt it. I told you the Stones only make boys,” he said, sticking his chest out.

  “Whatever,” she said, slapping his arm. “I can’t wait to tell April and Darlene.” She looked at the test and grinned.

  “Well, if it is a girl, Darlene’s gonna be mad,” he said.

  “And if it is a boy, April gon’ be mad,” she said.

  “Yep. To have four boys and didn’t make one girl sucks.”

  “And look at April. Poor Tony. He has four girls, so he’s got it worse.” They laughed.

  “Well, it don’t matter what this one is. I’m gonna be happy.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes, baby, really. Because, after this one, we are having another anyway.”

  “No, no. Hell, no. This is it.”

  “What do you mean, Novey? You said we would have three.” He followed her into their bedroom.

  “Well, I’ve changed my mind.”

  “How are you just gon’ change your mind?”

  “Because, baby, I’m getting older. At the rate I’m going, I’ll never be able to start my own business.”

  “Aww, here we go. I thought we discussed this. I thought we decided it was better for you to stay home and take care of the house.”

  “No, baby, you decided that.”

  “No, we agreed when we decided to try to get pregnant that you would stay home.”

  “Not forever, baby. I love you, and I love our son, and I want to be a good mother to our kids, but I don’t want all my hard work in school and getting my degrees to be a waste. I’m tired of feeling like a nobody, babe.”

  “Novey, you’re not a nobody. You are a wife and a mother. Don’t I give you everything you need? Is this not the house that you wanted? When you wanted to get the Tahoe, I got it for you. When you wanna shop, you shop. You eat wherever you wanna eat. I work hard to provide my family with a good lifestyle.

  “I don’t want you to stress out like you do when you’re working. Having your own business has its perks, don’t get me wrong, because we couldn’t live like we do if I didn’t, but it was hard, baby. I don’t want you to worry about working. Just relax, take care of me, and take care of our children, that’s it.” He rubbed her back.

  What he said was right and made sense, but November still wanted to do it. “I know, Tracy, but I just want something for me. I wanna feel like I have accomplished something. I want to be successful doing something I love to do.”

  “You are successful at what you do. You take care of me and TJ, and you have provided us with a clean and loving home. I love that you get up and cook me breakfast in the morning. When I call and say I’ll be home for lunch, you make me a slamming turkey on wheat. When I come home, the scent of your delicious food hits my nose. I like having you here when I come in from work. You make me feel better when I’ve had a stressful day. You are my helpmate. I take care of things outside of the home, and you take care of things inside of the home.

  “I have a clean home and clean clothes, and my son has his mother to look after him. Baby, you need to just relax and enjoy motherhood. Now that we are pregnant again, you need to relax and enjoy your pregnancy. Just like with TJ, we can hire help on the days you don’t feel like doing anything. And I’ll take care of you like I always have.”

  Tears rolled down her cheeks. Everything he said sounded great, and she was happy with the luxuries of life that he offered her, but why didn’t he understand that she needed something too? He had his businesses and was looking for new opportunities, but he couldn’t understand why she wanted to have her own.

  She put her head down. It was useless to argue with him anymore. He didn’t see for her what she saw for herself. He was dead set on her being a homemaker, regardless of what she said or felt. She wiped her face and rubbed her tummy. She decided not to discuss the matter anymore because it wasn’t like she could start her business tomorrow. She just wanted him to support her in starting her own business in the future.

  She turned
to him and let him hold her while she sobbed. He held her and continued to run down all the positive things about her being a stay-at-home mom. She didn’t dispute it or argue; she just went along with what he said like she normally did. She promised him that she’d relax and not let anything stress her out during her pregnancy and she gave him a faint smile. He kissed her on her forehead and left her alone to rest.

  She climbed into bed, pulled the covers over her head, and cried until she fell asleep.

  Chapter Thirty-three

  Oh, my God, November thought, spotting Kendell sitting at a table with a young, beautiful woman. She turned away to try to make sure he didn’t see her. Now seven months pregnant, she thought she looked like a beached whale. She tried to pay for her food, grab her bags, and get out of the restaurant quickly, but before she could make her exit, he called her name. He had gotten up and was walking toward her, so she couldn’t just walk out like she didn’t hear him. She hesitantly turned around.

  “November?” he said again.

  “Kendell. Hi. How are you?”

  “I’m good. How are you?”

  “I’m fine,” she said, holding her stomach with her free hand.

  “That’s good. I see you have a stranger aboard?”

  “Yes. She is due in June. I’ve got about two and a half more months.”

  “Wow, that’s good. How is your son? I know he is getting big.”

  “Yes, he is, and he’s a handful. How is business for you?”

  “Business is awesome, thank God. I’m working harder since you’ve been gone.”

  “Yeah, I know it’s tough.”

  “Yes, but I manage. I take it you and Tracy are doing well?”

  “Yes, we are fine. And your lady friend?” The woman at the table was staring her up and down.

  “Well, you know me. I’m still looking for my November, and trust me, she is not it. When I drop her off tonight, she definitely will not be seeing me again.” They laughed a little.

  November knew she needed to make an exit. Seeing him again and looking into his eyes made her feel some old feelings and she didn’t want to go there. Kendell was looking even better than he did back then, and she didn’t want to revisit the past.

  “Well, Kendell, I gotta run,” she said, holding up her takeout. “I’ve got to get home.”

  “Okay. It was so good to see you, November.”

  “You too, Kendell.”

  He smiled at her. He was gorgeous, and although she loved Tracy, Kendell was a man she could see herself with.

  “Take care,” she said and headed out the door.

  He came out behind her and called her name.

  “Shit,” she said and turned her attention back to him.

  “I just wanted to tell you, November, that I’m honestly happy that you and Tracy worked things out. All I wanted for you was you to be happy. I was sore about the way things turned out, but I’m wise enough to know that you can’t go around falling in love with another’s man wife. You have to know that I regret the entire situation, but I don’t regret meeting you. And I enjoyed working with you.”

  “I am sorry too, Kendell, that you got mixed up in my and Tracy’s drama. I am glad to have had the opportunity to work with you. You are brilliant, and I wish you luck.”

  “Thank you, November, and when you decide to step out there and give me some competition, call me if you need some help getting things going. I’ve been through this entire process, and I can help you avoid some of the same beginner business mistakes I made.”

  “Thanks, Kendell. I’ll keep that in mind. Good night.” She turned and headed for her SUV.

  “Good night to you, November,” he said.

  She didn’t look back. She climbed into her truck and put her bags on the passenger’s seat. She took a few cleansing breaths and closed her eyes, trying to shake the image of Kendell out of her mind. She thought about how they used to hang out and how good he was to her. She wondered what her life would have been like if she had fallen for Kendell and gone through with what Tracy tried to set her up to do.

  Her baby moved, and she touched her stomach and shook the thoughts of Kendell off. She cranked her truck and pulled out and left her thoughts in the parking space.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  November sat in the nursery rocking her newborn daughter, Trinity. She looked at her infant and wondered how she and Tracy had made someone so perfect and beautiful. TJ was a handsome little guy, but Trinity had stolen her heart.

  She hummed and rocked her little girl, wondering who she would grow up to be. What kind of example would she set for her little angel? She wanted Trinity to grow up knowing how to be self-sufficient and take care of herself. Although November had a good husband who was financially set, it may not be that way for Trinity.

  “I’ll have to teach you that we women have to be independent and not rely on others to do for us, because we sometimes have to do for ourselves,” she said to her two-week-old princess.

  November knew she had plenty of time to mold Trinity, but she wondered what example being a housewife set. How would she show her baby girl that she could accomplish anything if she hadn’t accomplished the one thing she wanted to accomplish because she was letting someone hold her back?

  “Mommy is gonna go for it and do what I gotta do to have some of what I want for myself, so you, little one, will have a role model in your life who at least went for her dreams.”

  She laid her sleeping baby in her crib and stood there for a few moments with a smile on her face. She was so proud to be the mother of two beautiful children. Her daughter had given her a sense of completion. She loved her husband and was glad to have a man in her life who loved her and was there for her and her children. Tracy wasn’t perfect, and he had done things in the past, but by the grace of God, they had made it through. Her family was intact.

  Now, there was nothing else to do but prove herself. She knew Tracy was never going to give in to her starting her own business, so she was going to take matters into her own hands. She would just have to show him that she had what it took to be a mother, housewife, and career woman. She was dead set on doing what she wanted to do. Why he couldn’t just help her and support her was a mystery to her. If she wanted it, she had to go and get it.

  * * *

  “What’s so hard?” she asked Jonathan. She gripped the phone tightly. “All I need is a closing date. It is getting more and more difficult to keep this from Tracy. I’m running out of excuses to meet with you and the contractors every other day. You know how my husband is,” she said impatiently.

  She had found a building and bought the space. It was in a great location, but it hadn’t been used in more than eight years, and it needed some major upgrades before it would pass inspection. They were already three weeks behind schedule.

  “I know, November, but with construction, you know they run into delays. The more they’ve worked, the more things they’ve found that need repair. You knew when you bought the place it was a risk and a time capsule.”

  “Listen, Jonathan, I know what you’re saying, but I’m going broke,” she huffed. Tracy had no idea she was using the money Kendell paid back for her business. No way could she dip into their account without him seeing it. “This is the company you referred me to, and you promised they’d make it happen. I want to still have my husband when this is over. Lying to him is horrible enough. I’m tired of sneaking around behind his back.”

  “I know, November, and I promise you that I’m on it.”

  “Okay, Jonathan. I’m depending on you to come through for me because if I keep this routine up, my husband is going to find out. I want to be the one to tell him. I don’t want him to kill me, do you understand?”

  “It’s gonna be soon, trust me,” Jonathan said.

  “I hope so because this is my life we are talking about. I have a lot riding on this. If this doesn’t go as planned, things will be bad, and I can’t have that happen.” She loved Tracy and ha
ted going behind his back doing what she was doing. This had to come to an end before he found out what she had been up to behind his back.

  “I hear you, November. Please relax. I will get some answers and dates for you.”

  “Okay, Jonathan. I’ll talk to you soon. And please, if I don’t pick up, leave me a message.”

  “I know, I know,” he said.

  “Okay, bye,” she said and hung up.

  * * *

  Tracy rushed down the steps and into the kitchen. His heart pounded, and he was shaking. He grabbed the scotch and poured himself a shot. He downed it, poured another one, and downed it too. His worst nightmare had come true. November had actually gone out and had an affair. He’d heard it out of her own mouth when he walked past the office. After she had promised him and swore she’d never do it, she did. His eyes welled, but then he heard her voice behind him, and he straightened up.

  “Hey, babe, what do you want for dinner tonight?” she asked casually.

  He wondered how she could come downstairs and act so naturally and innocent when she had just gotten off the phone with her lover. He didn’t face her at all as she moved around the kitchen.

  “Tracy, baby, did you hear me? What you wanna eat, baby?”

  He took a deep breath. “I’m good. I’m not too hungry.” He walked out of the kitchen into the family room.

  “Tracy, are you all right?” she asked him. “You look upset, baby. What is it?”

  “I’m fine,” he said, trying not to look at her.

  “Are you sure?” she asked as she put her cell phone into her purse.

  “Yeah, baby, I’m good.”

  “Well, let me run up and check on the baby, and I’ll be right back down.”

  When she ran up the steps, Tracy hurried over to her purse and retrieved her cell phone. He scrolled through her calls and saw outgoing and incoming calls to and from Jonathan. He almost passed out when he saw Kendell’s name. Confused and outraged, he dropped the phone back into her purse and went into the bathroom. What in the hell was she doing talking to Jonathan? And Kendell, for that matter?

  He started to feel sick. He wanted to cry and punch the wall at the same time. Who was she actually messing with? Was she sleeping with both of them?