If I Can't Have You

by Dawn Jiles

  “Please go,” Tremaine said to my back, because I was already heading to the front door.

  When I stepped outside and looked back through the open door, I could see them going at it. That was what her ass got. Now she had a taste of her own medicine.

  Sam

  To say I was pissed would be an understatement, because I was beyond pissed. I was so mad, I could literally kill her and I wouldn’t think twice about it, but right now, I had bigger fish to fry.

  “I cannot believe you have me staying in the same house you were fuckin’ that bitch in!” I snapped.

  “Sam, I honestly didn’t think it would be a big deal. It’s not like you didn’t know we had slept together. We were dating for a while,” he said.

  “I don’t give a damn if you were dating for ten years. You should have moved me and your son into a different place.”

  “Okay, baby, I hear you. I already had plans for us to move, anyway,” he said.

  “Are you still in love with her? You want her back, don’t you?” I said.

  “Are you serious?” he asked.

  “Dead ass,” I said.

  “Sam, if you can’t see by now that you are the only woman that has my heart, I don’t know what to tell you.”

  “I don’t believe your ass, especially since I caught y’all in here talking alone, and you’re taking her side,” I snapped.

  “Sam, you have lost your mind. I was not taking up for her. And you know what? I’m done with this conversation.” He was about to take off.

  “Baby, wait. I know you love me, and it better stay that way. I don’t want to have to hurt you too,” I threatened. I was so serious, because, like I had said many times before, if I couldn’t have him, no one else would. I had decided that Tremaine was the only man for me.

  “Don’t threaten me, Sam. I have a surprise for you, but you two may have ruined it. Sam, I don’t understand why you won’t just let go of whatever it is that you are holding on to with Mo.”

  “I have let it go,” I lied.

  “I heard everything y’all talked about, and my question to you is, do you have feelings for Corey?” he asked.

  “No, I don’t have feelings for him, the only man I love is you,” I replied, and I was telling the truth.

  “Well, if that’s the case, baby, I need you to stop with all this mess and focus on our family. Oh, and since y’all ruined my surprise, I bought us a house, so get to packing,” he said and then smiled at me. I ran over to him and jumped in his arms. He picked me up and wrapped my legs firmly around his waist. I began to kiss him all over his face to show my appreciation.

  “Baby, thank you for everything you do for me and our son,” I said.

  “You are welcome, but promise me you are going to do better, Sam. If you don’t change, I am going to leave you, because I’m trying to do great things, and I need you on board with what I’m doing,” he said.

  I answered him by kissing him on the lips and then trailing my lips down his neck. I dropped to my knees and pulled down his basketball shorts. I took his balls and pole in my mouth and sucked on both of them softly, with a hint of roughness. His head tilted back, so I knew he was enjoying the feeling of my warm mouth going up and down his shaft.

  Once I was done, and I knew he was about to cum, I took off all my clothes, and I bent over in front of him and touched my toes. I took my middle finger, licked it, and then began to play with Miss Kitty. He stood there with his pole hard as hell, watching me bring myself to an orgasm. I used my finger to tell him to come to me, and he did what he was told. He entered me while I was bent over, touching my toes. I played with my clit while he continued to stroke me really good. Moments later, we had both cum, and we fell on the couch and cuddled.

  Once I got rid of Mo, my life would be perfect, but I could no longer wait. Something had to be done now.

  Chapter Thirty-eight

  Sharon

  Things between Cameron and me had been perfect, but today I had an agenda. My daughter had told me that Kendra and Tim had made things official. I texted Tim and told him I wanted to talk, and of course, his ass was all too eager to do so. I hadn’t seen him since the day I left his sorry ass, but today I had something to prove. He asked me to come to the house we had once shared so we could have this so-called conversation. I drank a whole bottle of wine before I went there because I had to be tipsy to do what I had in mind.

  I pulled up to the house, and the front door flew open before I had even parked my car good. Tim was at the door, with the biggest smile I had ever seen on his face, but this visit wasn’t for pleasure. It was just business. I walked up to him and gave him a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek. Don’t get me wrong. Tim was one of the finest men I had ever laid eyes on, but now the sight of him made me sick to my stomach, and his touch was just as bad. I pulled myself together because I had an agenda, and I was going to accomplish it.

  I walked inside the house, and everything was totally different. There was new furniture and pictures of little Tim and Kendra all over the place. The house was still clean, and to be honest, it looked good. Tim and I sat down on the couch, and I made small talk with him.

  “Do you mind if I use the powder room?” I asked.

  “Sure, baby. This is still your house too,” he said.

  I gave him a weak smile and headed in the direction of the powder room. I skipped the powder room and went into the bedroom we had once shared. All types of memories flooded my mind. Once upon a time, this man had made me so happy. He had made love to my body like no other, but now it was over, and I had moved on with my life. I took my camera out of my purse, cut it on, and then placed it back in my purse. I went back to where Tim was sitting. It was time to put on a show. I walked over to him and sat on his lap.

  “You know, I miss the way you touch me and make love to me. You think we can make love one more time for old times’ sake?” I said and then brushed my lips across his.

  His pole instantly got hard. It never took much for me to turn him on. I grabbed his hand and led him to the bedroom. Once inside the room, I pushed him on the bed and then turned to examine the camera in my purse to make sure it was still on. Blocking Tim’s view with my body, I placed the purse on the dresser, pulled out the camera so that only the lens was showing, and pointed the lens at the bed. Then I slowly took off my clothes to give him a striptease. I had the perfect body for my age, and I knew Tim loved every inch of it. I told him to take all his clothes off, and he did as he was told.

  “Come over here and lick Miss Kitty,” I told him once he had undressed.

  He picked me up, put both of my legs over his shoulders, and dove head first into my honeypot. I came in his mouth twice, and I almost forgot whom I was with. I pushed him on the bed and put a condom on his pole.

  “Sharon, do we really have to use one of these?” he said, pointing at his condom-wrapped penis.

  “Um, yes, if you want some of Miss Kitty,” I purred.

  I fucked Tim in every position imaginable until we had both come twice. Once we were done, I immediately got up and got dressed. Then I pushed the camera back inside my purse, picked up the purse, and headed to the bedroom door.

  “Sharon, where are you going?” Tim asked, with a panicked look on his face.

  I stopped and turned to look at him. “I’m going home,” I said nonchalantly.

  “What do you mean, you’re going home? We just made love. I thought that meant you wanted to work on us,” he said, and I burst out laughing.

  “You couldn’t have thought that. I would never be with you again, and trust me, this was the last time we will ever sleep together,” I said.

  “Sharon, please. I don’t love Kendra like I love you. I would leave her in a heartbeat for you. You have my heart, not her,” he said, practically in tears.

  “Well, what can I say . . . ? You should have thought about that before you cheated on me with several women and ruined our marriage. This was fun, but it will never happen again, a
nd there will never be a you and me again,” I said, then turned to leave once again.

  He turned his back to me, and I used that as an opportunity to cut the camera off.

  “Well, I’ve got to go,” I said with a big-ass grin on my face. And with that, I left my old house. I had got what I had come there for. Now I was going to send the video I had shot to Kendra so that she could get a taste of what she had given me.

  Payback is a bitch!

  Bria

  I hadn’t talked to David since the day I left his office, but his mother had called me, trying to check me for beating Meka’s ass. When she said Meka’s name, I hung up in her face, because I already knew that Meka had told her a bunch of lies, which she had obviously fallen for. She called back several times, but I didn’t answer. When she realized I wasn’t going to pick up my phone, she sent me a few text messages, telling me how wrong I was for hurting Meka and how I needed to accept the fact that she and David were trying to work on their relationship. I blocked all their asses and kept it moving.

  Nathan and I had been spending a lot of time together. I had told him all about David, and he had been keeping my mind off all my problems. At first, it was just something to do to help get over the pain I felt from this situation with David, but now I thought it was turning into something more. I liked spending time with him, and when we were not together, I found myself thinking about him a lot. Not to mention, I hadn’t had sex since the day David and I broke up, and I was horny as hell, but Nathan had been the perfect gentleman. He hadn’t tried one time to have sex with me, and I really appreciated him for that.

  Today Nathan and I decided to go to this place named Chops. It was one of my favorite places to eat. We were about to head inside when I felt someone snatch my arm. I was about to snap at whoever the hell it was, until I looked into David’s eyes and saw nothing but anger and hurt. I got scared because I didn’t think I had ever seen him look this pissed.

  “We have been broken up for all of two weeks, and you have already moved on to the next nigga,” he said.

  “Man, hold up. Don’t be grabbing on her like that. And I am not your nigga,” Nathan said.

  Before things escalated, I put an end to it all. “Nathan, can you please give us a minute?” I asked him.

  Nathan looked hesitant at first, but he eventually walked off.

  “First of all, David, we have been broken up for months now, and second, you should have thought about what I was going to be doing before you let this ho of a baby mama of yours ruin our relationship,” I snapped.

  “I don’t want to hear none of that shit. Despite her being messy, I was faithful to your ass, and I took good care of you and my son. Just because things got a little hard, you are ready to give up on me,” he said.

  “Isn’t that what you did? When you found out I was pregnant, you turned into a different person and cheated on me with that rat who has made both of our lives a living hell, and you refuse to do anything about it. You won’t get a paternity test to even see if the child is really yours,” I snapped.

  “Bria, baby, I am trying to fix all this mess. I love you, and I can’t do this without you. You are my rib, Bria. I need you by my side,” he said. At that moment, I wanted to run in his arms and take him back, but I had to be strong.

  “If you want me back, your actions would show that, but I am not going to wait around for you to do that. I gave you almost ten years of my life, and you put this woman you barely even know before me. As of now, I am done with you, David. I’ve got to go,” I told him, and then I walked off. He ran behind me and grabbed me.

  “Just give me some time. I will fix all of this,” he pleaded.

  I nodded at him, then walked inside the restaurant and left him standing outside. It took everything I had in me to walk away from him, because, truth be told, he had my heart, but I refused to go back to that messy situation. If he got a blood test, only then would I consider taking him back, but if he didn’t, David and I were over for good. I found Nathan at one of the tables, but I was no longer in the mood to eat.

  “Hey, you,” I said to Nathan.

  “Hey, you ready to eat?” he asked, smiling at me.

  “I’m not really in the mood to be here. Maybe we can grab some fast food and go back to your place,” I suggested.

  “Cool,” he said, and then we left the restaurant. We stopped at KFC for some chicken and at the liquor store for some Patrón.

  When we got to his place, we ate our food and took shot after shot. I was past drunk. I wanted to drink away my feelings. I wasn’t thinking about David, but my ass was still horny, and the liquor only seemed to increase this. Nathan was sitting next to me, looking and smelling good as hell. I straddled him and just stared in his eyes for a second before I placed my lips on his. His lips felt good against mine, and I was so wrapped up in our kiss, until an image of David popped in my head. I slowly pulled away from the kiss and sat back down next to Nathan.

  All of a sudden, he laid me down on the couch and hiked my dress up. He didn’t bother taking my panties off; he just pushed them to the side and dove headfirst with his tongue into my honeypot. I wanted so badly to stop him, because I had begun to feel bad, but his head game was something serious, and he immediately brought me to an orgasm. Once he was finished, he went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth, then came back with a wet cloth and wiped me off. He pulled me close to him on the couch, and we both drifted off to sleep.

  When I woke up the next morning, I had a major headache, and my stomach was growling. Nathan was no longer next to me, and I realized he had moved me into the bedroom. I was so glad I didn’t have sex with him, because I now realized I would have regretted it. Truth was, I really missed David, and he was really the one I wanted. I just couldn’t deal with all the drama anymore. A few minutes later. Nathan walked into the bedroom with some breakfast, which smelled and looked awesome.

  “Hey, sleepyhead,” he said.

  “Hey, handsome,” I said, then kissed him on the lips and took the breakfast from him.

  We ate breakfast in bed and talked about miscellaneous stuff. Then he dropped me off at my mom’s house, and he went to basketball practice. I was so confused because I was actually feeling Nathan, but I knew my heart belonged to David. I just didn’t know if David deserved it or if we were really meant to be together, like I had always thought. I had to figure out something, because I didn’t want to break anyone’s heart.

  Kendra

  I was sitting on the floor, playing with my son, when I got an e-mail from Sharon. What the hell does this bitch want? I thought.

  From: Sharon

  Subject: Payback is a Bitch

  After watching this video, I hope you feel as hurt as you have made me feel over the years. You do know karma is a bitch, and you reap what you sow!

  I was hesitant at first to even click on the e-mail, but my curiosity got the best of me. As I began to watch the video, I was filled with hurt and rage. When I heard Tim say that he would leave me for Sharon and that he loved her more, I really began to bawl. Karma had hit me, but unlike Sharon, this shit didn’t faze me, because I was not leaving Tim. But I would check him and Sharon about what he had done. I dropped my son off at Sam’s new house and headed straight to Tim’s office.

  “Hey, girl. I was just about to call you. That ho Madison is in there,” his receptionist told me, pointing at Tim’s office.

  “Oh, really? Thanks for the update, girl,” I said, and then I walked toward his office. When I opened the door, I got the shock of my life. Madison was bouncing up and down on my man’s dick, and I could tell that he was in pure heaven. She was buck ass naked, and so was he. I stepped into the office. They were so into the sex that they didn’t even realize that I was inside the office. I was so hurt and lost in what was going on that I wasn’t able to open my mouth.

  “Yes, Daddy. Cum for Mama,” Madison said as Tim gripped her hips and began to pump inside of her harder. I knew he was about to cum, becaus
e he made the same face every time I made him cum. Hearing her speak brought me back to reality.

  “Ain’t neither one of y’all about to be coming in this bitch,” I said as I threw the picture of Sharon that Tim still had on his desk. Madison jumped off Tim, and when she did, you could see the cum squirt from his pole. This nigga did not have the decency to wear a condom, which pissed me off even more.

  “So, not only are you still sleeping with her, but you’re fucking her without a condom too?” I snarled, walking closer to Madison. But before I could put my hands on her, Tim jumped in the middle of us.

  “What are you doing here, Kendra?” he said, clearly exhausted.

  “That’s all you can say to me when I just caught you cheating on me?” I asked.

  “Madison, get your things on and please leave,” he ordered.

  Madison threw her clothes on, but she didn’t leave the office.

  “You’re still fucking Sharon too, I see. She sent me the little video you two made,” I said and then slapped the shit out of him.

  “Kendra, keep your hands off me! And I have no idea what you are talking about. I never made any video with my wife. I mean, ex-wife,” he told me.

  I pulled out my phone and played the video. “What the hell is this, then? Please don’t try to lie to me, because those are the same sheets we just picked out when we moved in together,” I growled.

  He took the phone from my hand and began to watch the video.

  “Wait. You moved in with her, when you just told me that you were going to get a place with me and our baby?” Madison said and burst into tears.

  “She’s pregnant? Oh, hell naw!” I screeched, and then I repeatedly punched Tim all over his body. The only reason Madison didn’t get a few punches was that she was pregnant, and I wasn’t trying to go to jail. Tim was finally able to gain control of my arms, and then I burst into tears.

  “How could you do this to me? I stood by your side after all these years, after I watched you marry and have a baby with someone else. I still wanted you after you treated me and your daughter like we didn’t exist for all those years, and you still had the nerves to cheat on me and have another baby on me,” I cried, not believing my own words as they left my mouth.