Beards

by Serena J Bishop

“Like, I could stay up past my bedtime with Dad and Early because Gina and Mom were fighting upstairs or Gina would roll her eyes whenever Mom would remind me that when we went out together, Gina was just her friend. Now, that I’m older, I can see that it was a recipe for disaster.”

  “How did Early and your Dad react?”

  Stevie smiled and smoothed his goatee. “They both became super Dads in every sense of the word and I think watching what happened with Gina and Mom actually strengthened their relationship.”

  Bradyn thought of the upcoming wedding. “I can see that. Will Gina be at your mom and dad’s weddings? Things between them must have gotten better?” Stevie simply stared at her. “Right?”

  DECEMBER 2002

  UNDERWOOD SADDLED UP BESIDE STEVEN at the urinal. “Holy shit, Fields! I just heard the news.”

  Steven kept his eyes forward and answered cautiously, “What news would that be?”

  “That DiCarlo’s a big dyke. Ha!” He smiled at his own pronouncement as he conducted his business. “It’s all over the station that’s why she’s getting divorced—she realized she was gay. Although, I don’t know how she just realized that.”

  This wasn’t a surprise to Steven. Gina had told him that she was done hiding so when people asked her why she was getting a divorce she was going to tell the truth. The truth was that she was a gay woman and her husband wasn’t.

  “But then again, that husband of hers seemed pretty faggy.”

  “You know, ‘faggy’ and ‘dyke’ aren’t acceptable terms for a police officer to use.”

  Underwood furrowed his brow in confusion. That just didn’t make sense. “Hey, just between you and me,” he leaned over into Steven’s space, breaking several non-written urinal rules, “did she ever hit on Roni when you lived together? Because the two of them together...that would have been pretty hot.”

  Steven tucked and flushed. “Goodbye, Underwood.”

  Finley noticed that his partner looked much more comfortable when he returned to the cruiser. “Feel better?”

  “Much. Remind me not to order the large apple cider even when it’s freezing outside.” Steven buckled himself in and they started their afternoon patrol.

  As they drove their route in the daytime, the holiday decorations weren’t nearly as vibrant. No lights, just the bare wires that stood out against the brick or siding. But the wreaths on doors and plastic reindeer or snowman figures in yards were constant reminders that Christmas was around the corner.

  “Is Stevie excited for Christmas?”

  “Oh my, yes. Although, after all of the sugar cookies he ate this weekend at Devin’s house, I think he’s still feeling a bit sick.” Steven smiled as he remembered Gina’s description of picking Stevie up for church two days prior. Stevie held his stomach and asked her if she could drive slower with the window down. Stevie had a hangover of the cookie variety. “I’m just glad he didn’t throw up in Gina’s car.”

  Finley smiled politely. “You’re cool with Stevie still spending time with Gina even though she’s gay?”

  “Absolutely. Her being gay doesn’t change who she is to me or to Stevie. They still love each other and I’m not going to take him away from her or vice versa.”

  “That’s good to hear. I was worried that you were going to be a homophobe or something like that.”

  Steven resisted the urge to smile. “No, I’m definitely not a homophobe. In fact, I just corrected some of Underwood’s slang in the station.” Finley’s stance could mean he was a strong ally or it could also mean something else. “It’s cool if you are, but are you...?”

  “Gay?” Finley shook his head. “No, but my cousins are, they’re identical, and my one aunt is too. As long as someone is a decent human being, I could care less if they’re gay, straight, bi, or whatever else there is out there. As long as they are consenting adults and not hurting anyone else.”

  “I feel the same way.”

  “Good. Does Gina’s family know?”

  Steven thoroughly enjoyed this newly discovered side to his partner. He hadn’t felt this comfortable on the job since working beside Gina. “They do, but unfortunately, because of it, they want nothing to do with her. They’re very old-school Italian Catholics.”

  “As someone who comes from an old-school, Irish Catholic background, I can imagine.” Luckily, that was only his father’s side. “Is she still going to be over at your place for Christmas? Or do you think that would be too weird?”

  Steven hadn’t even thought of that. They were Gina’s second chance at a family and now she had been essentially kicked out of that one too. “Right now, things are still strained. But I’ll bring it up. Everyone should have someplace to go on Christmas.”

  ***

  “Come on, Roni. You’re being unreasonable.”

  “I am not! Maybe she should have thought about the consequences more thoroughly before she stuck her tongue in the mouth of that cleavagey booze slinger,” Roni shot back at Steven, as she set the table for dinner.

  “But it’s Christmas and she has no other family,” Steven pleaded. “You don’t know what it’s like to have your family completely turn their backs to you.” He did harbor some hope that someday his nieces, Jem and Keziah, would come around.

  Roni stood with her hands on her hips, she did not want to give in, but deep down she knew that Steven was right. She had no idea what it was like to lose family. Granted, she never felt close to her own family, but feeling a lack of connection and having it removed from you were two separate issues. “What do you suggest then?”

  “When she comes over tomorrow to get Stevie, just ask her if she has somewhere to go. If she doesn’t, tell her she is welcome to come here.”

  “Fine,” she replied bitterly, “I’ll ask.”

  ***

  Roni stood at the door with her arms folded. “Seriously?”

  Gina mirrored Roni’s stance. “What?”

  “Your hair. It’s...It’s...”

  “Styled. The word you’re looking for is styled.” Gina had gone to the salon earlier in the week and was going to get the same haircut as always, very short all around except a little longer at the top. However, Gina’s stylist was able to convince her that she could pull off a look that was both professional and sexy at the same time. “I happen to like it, and the gel smells like mangos.”

  Actually, Roni liked the new look too. She liked it a lot. It was long enough to grab while she kissed her passionately, but short enough to give Gina that edge Roni found to be both sexy and dangerous. However, she couldn’t let Gina know any of that. “Well, I think it looks stupid.”

  “It’s a good thing I don’t care what you think,” Gina shared.

  Roni gritted her teeth and turned to yell up the stairs, “Stevie, Gina’s here!”

  “Okay, Mom,” resonated down the steps. “I just need to tie my shoes.”

  Roni turned back to find Gina staring at her. “What?”

  “Nothing.” Truthfully, Roni was wearing a forest green sweater that clung to her in the best of ways, with dark leggings that hugged every curve of her long legs. “I was looking at your hair too.”

  Roni squinted skeptically and then looked over her shoulder, “Stevie, hurry up.” She locked eyes again with Gina and with as little emotion in her voice asked the question Steven had requested. “What are you doing Christmas day?”

  “Working. I figured since I didn’t have any place to go I might as well let somebody who has a family get the day off.”

  Ouch. “Well, I know that we’re not at a point yet where we can coexist beyond five minutes without fighting, but it would make Stevie happy to do something with you. I can make myself scarce Christmas Eve. Allison invited me to her holiday party so you and the boys could do something together here.”

  “That’s very considerate of you. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  Stevie rushed passed Roni and into Gina’s arms for a hug. “Your hair is so cool! Can I touch
it?”

  “Sure,” Gina said with a smile. Stevie gingerly touched her gelled spikes. “But we have to go now or we’ll be late.”

  “Okay.” Stevie turned to give his mother a hug. “Bye.”

  Roni kissed the top of his head as she hugged him back. She used to have to get down on one knee to do that, but he was so tall that a small bend at the waist did the trick. “Don’t eat so many pancakes this time. I love you.”

  Early came up from the basement and paused at the top of the stairs. Once the front door shut he cleared his throat loudly.

  “What?” Roni asked and took her seat on the couch where she had been reading the latest Harry Potter.

  “That was very nice of you,” he said and shrugged on his puffy winter jacket.

  “Well, I didn’t do it for her. I did it for the rest of you,” she said and opened to where she had marked her page. “Where are you going?”

  “Picking up a present I ordered for Steven. Custom made sure takes a while.”

  Roni smiled softly. It was nice that at least one couple in the house was able to make it work.

  ***

  “What did you think of the message at church today?” Gina asked Stevie after they settled in with their pancakes.

  Stevie sipped his milk through a straw and briefly pondered that question. It was a routine the two of them had settled into over the past five months. “It’s kind of weird to think that Jesus was a baby and he has a birthday and that birthday is Christmas.”

  “I can understand that. You’re used to seeing him as a grown-up.”

  “Yeah.” Stevie went back to eating his breakfast.

  “Speaking of Christmas, are you excited for Santa?” Gina asked with a large smile.

  “Oh my gosh, yes!”

  “Yeah, which part are you most excited for?”

  “The presents,” Stevie answered honestly and attempted to get far too much pancake into his mouth at once.

  “Careful there. You don’t want to choke. Which present do you hope Santa brings you the most?” My bet is on Lego Harry Potter.

  Stevie swallowed in one giant gulp and washed it down with his milk. “For you to come back and live with us.”

  A brand new aching, gut-wrenching pain traveled through Gina’s viscera. Just when she thought she had healed, the wounds reopened.

  THREE WEEKS LATER, JANUARY 2003

  STEVIE’S BEAR OF A PRINCIPAL, Mr. Robin, sat behind his desk with two papers in front of him. “Thank you for coming in, Mr. Thibodeaux. I couldn’t get in touch with either of Stevie’s parents.”

  “I guess that’s why they make room for three emergency contacts,” Early wryly responded as he made himself comfortable in the visitor’s chair. “The woman who called me said that Stevie had been in a fight, but he wasn’t injured.”

  “That’s correct, but unfortunately the other boy has a shiner due to the altercation.”

  “Well, surely Stevie was defending himself?”

  Mr. Robin shook his head.

  “Defending someone else?” Early hoped.

  The principal shook his head once more.

  “That just doesn’t make sense. Why would Stevie just randomly hit some kid in the face?”

  “Santa Claus,” the principal succinctly answered.

  Early uncrossed his legs and leaned forward. “Stevie got into a fight because of Santa Claus?”

  The principal nodded. “Apparently, Stevie and a few other boys were talking about what they got for Christmas and the one boy said that Santa got him...well, I don’t know what it was, but Stevie said there was no Santa. They got into a shouting match regarding Santa’s existence and then Stevie punched him.”

  “Good Lord!”

  “I know, but I have a greater concern, Mr. Thibodeaux. Overall, Stevie has done well in school, but both times,” he picked up the two pieces of paper in front of him, “I’ve had to discipline him was for fighting in school. This is a pattern of behavior that isn’t acceptable and he has to learn that now. He’s already bigger than most of the other kids—he could put someone in the hospital. Please, please tell his mother and father that they should get to the root of this and come up with a strategy for him to work through his anger. If they need to, they are welcome to contact our school guidance counselor for assistance.”

  “I’ll tell them.” Early sighed. He was not looking forward to this. “I’m guessing I need to take that paper home and have one of them sign it.”

  “Correct.” He handed Early the paper and shook his other hand. “And as an aside, I went to your restaurant two weeks ago and I had a marvelous time. Wonderful establishment.”

  “I appreciate that, Mr. Robin.” Early desperately wanted to bask in the compliment, but he had godfatherly matters to attend to. He left the principal’s office and collected an angry, teary-eyed Stevie from the waiting area in the main office. Along with Stevie was his unusually large, stuffed backpack. This time Stevie was on out-of-school suspension for three days and had work to take home.

  Once settled in the car, Stevie sniffled loudly and wiped his nose with the sleeve of his coat. “Are you mad?”

  Early tilted his eyes up to see Stevie in the rear-view mirror. “Yes, I am mad. I’m also disappointed and confused. Why on Earth would you punch a kid in the face for believing in Santa Claus? You believe in Santa Claus!”

  Stevie pouted, “No, I don’t. Not anymore.”

  “You believed in him a week and a half ago. You got presents from him, including a very impressive Harry Potter Lego set that I spent hours helping you build.”

  “I told Santa that I wanted Gina back and she hasn’t come back yet so I don’t believe in him anymore.”

  ***

  Stevie was not pleased with his punishment. Three necessities in life had been taken from him: television, video games, and allowance. This made getting him into bed easier so Roni, Steven, and Early could maturely discuss what had happened.

  “Quit looking at me like this is my fault,” Roni demanded.

  “Oh, I’m sorry,” Early sarcastically drawled. “I forgot that I was the one who overreacted and broke up our happy home. Oh, wait. That was you!”

  “Guys, keep your voices down,” Steven spoke up and took control of the family meeting. “This is getting us nowhere. Early, tone down the bitchiness. Roni, quit acting like you had no part in this.”

  “But she—”

  “I know,” Steven cut her off. He had heard this hundreds of times. Literally, he had heard about this every single day since they came home from the ballgame in July. “Gina lied and kissed another woman. I know. You feel betrayed. I know. You’re not getting back together. I know. But our son still thinks you two are going to make up and live happily ever after. I think it’s well beyond time for you to tell him that you and Gina are finished so he can start to heal.”

  Roni’s blood boiled a moment ago and now her heart felt frozen from Steven’s truthful words. “I know. I’ll—” Roni was cut off by the pounding rhythm of small, angry feet running up the stairs followed by a door slamming shut.

  “Shit,” the three of them uttered in unison.

  Steven pointed a stern finger at Roni. “This is your mess.”

  “I’ll talk to him.” Roni took the long walk up the stairs.

  Early leaned against Steven’s shoulder and made a dramatic sob. “I really fucking hate this. Promise me that’ll never be us.”

  Steven kissed the crown of his head. “I promise.”

  While Steven reassured Early, Roni knocked softly and slowly opened the door to Stevie’s bedroom. She didn’t receive her usual greeting.

  “Go away! I hate you!”

  Roni felt a verbal slap across the face. “Stevie, we need to talk,” Roni said in a calm voice. As angry as she was at him for acting violently towards another person, she knew that he had held on to more emotion than he knew how to manage. She sat down on the edge of his bed while he remained under the covers with his back turned away.
“I’m sorry you heard all of that just now. That’s not how you should have found out about Gina and me.”

  “I don’t want to talk to you!”

  Roni half expected that, but it still stung. “Do you want to talk to Early or to your Dad?”

  “No! I want to talk to Gina,” he demanded from underneath his Pokémon comforter.

  That really hurt, but she glanced at his clock anyway. “Stevie, it’s ten o’clock. It’s too late ask her to come over.”

  Stevie poked his head out from the covers. “Can you call and ask her to come over in the morning?”

  That was pushing it, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

  ***

  “Steven?” Gina answered her cell from her desk at work. Now that she lived alone, she worked until she was either hungry or tired. “Is everything okay?”

  Roni had been holding her breath on the other end. “Actually, it’s me. I was afraid if I called you wouldn’t answer.”

  “And why would I do that?” Gina retorted curtly.

  Roni audibly sighed. “Can you at least try to keep the hostility out of your voice when you speak to me? I’m the woman scorned here.”

  Gina rolled her eyes. “What do you want, Roni?”

  “Stevie wants to talk to you before you go to work tomorrow morning. Long story short, he got into a fight at school.”

  “Is he okay?” Only Stevie could make Gina go from annoyed to fierce protector so quickly.

  “Yeah, he’s fine—physically. But he started it and it’s because...well...he needs to talk to you.”

  “You’re damn right he needs to talk to me if he’s starting fights.”

  “I don’t think you’re understanding what I’m saying. He punched some kid for believing in Santa. I guess he reached that conclusion when you weren’t under the tree Christmas morning.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me correctly. Then tonight, he overheard me tell Steven and Early that we’re not getting back together—”

  “You said that?” Gina asked a bit too sharply. As angry and hurt as she was, Gina had been holding on to the faintest of possibilities that there was hope for them. It was partially why she had turned down two dates in the past two weeks. Her new outed status and haircut was very popular with the ladies.