Reckless (The Reckless Series)

by True, Holli

  I love you.

  Jonah

  When she turned away slightly, I grew impatient, wanting to see her reaction. I wanted a closer look, but the aisles were so narrow, I knew she would sense my presence immediately, which was the last thing I wanted. Instead, I moved on to the next row, quickly making my way down to the area where she stood, observing her through a small gap between the books.

  Her expression was unreadable. It wasn’t until she reached up and wiped her cheek that I realized she was crying. She shook her head slightly, as if her mind was fighting the words she was reading, but I couldn’t be sure. And then a tiny miracle occurred. She smiled.

  The only thing I wanted more in that moment than to be with her, was to be a reason to make her smile. Because being with her wasn’t an option, I found contentment in knowing I could, at the very least, secure the other option.

  Hailey brushed away the rest of her tears, her eyes scanning the area. As the seconds passed, she looked increasingly impatient. Without saying a word, she drifted down the aisle. I traced her steps within my own, always watching her through the small windows between the books. Although the distance between us was small, the barrier of books was making me anxious.

  “Jonah,” she finally murmured, her eyes still searching.

  I froze.

  “Jonah, please. I know you’re here.”

  She was beckoning me. It was the very last thing I expected her to do, but the very thing my heart so desperately wanted her to do. My head and my heart immediately went to battle, it was a fight between right and wrong. Though, loving her felt so right that not being with her was the only thing that felt wrong anymore.

  “I shouldn’t have sent you away. I didn’t mean it,” she whispered, slowly moving down the row. She peeked through the books, if I was visible, she would have seen me, but she couldn’t. As she neared the end of the aisle, she turned slightly, continuing her search for me. “Jonah, please. I love you.”

  And that was all it took.

  In the blink of an eye, I transitioned into what I wished I could always be. Human, just as she was. Saying nothing, I stepped around to her row. All of the walls between us, both figuratively and physically, were no longer there.

  Still unaware that I was now there with her in my human shell, she took a small step backwards, unknowingly moving toward me. I inched forward, wrapping my arms around her, drawing her close against my chest. All at once, everything felt complete with her in my arms. She belonged there.

  “Jonah,” she cried softly, turning so we were face to face. As she wrapped her arms around my neck, her lips grazed my jawline as she repeatedly whispered the sweetest words in the world. “I love you, I love you.”

  I wanted to give in, but she had to know how complicated things were about to become. “This isn’t going to be easy,” I warned her.

  She shook her head slowly, “Nothing in life is. But that doesn’t scare me.”

  Her words consumed my heart, giving me all of the reassurance I needed. As I lifted her with ease, she wrapped her legs around my waist, positioning herself at my eye level. Her hands traveled up to my face, gently caressing my temple and cheek. The feel of her delicate hands sent a shiver down my spine. I closed my eyes, pressing my forehead to hers, writing this moment to memory so I could cherish it forever.

  “I love you, Hailey.”

  She nodded slightly, the love in her eyes mirroring mine. “I love you, more than anything. I don’t want you to go anywhere, I want you to stay with me. Always.”

  I smiled gently, “I can’t ever go anywhere. I’m tethered to you for eternity.”

  “That isn’t long enough,” she said softly, a playful smile spreading across her beautiful face. And with that, she pulled me toward her, bringing her lips to mine.

  - 17 -

  kiss me

  HAILEY

  Every step I took increased the anticipation growing inside of me. I was so eager to get to my bedroom, I was practically running up the stairs at mach speed. There was no time to take in the welcoming familiarity of the space, my childhood home, because all I wanted to do was see Jonah.

  “Okay, so how are we going to do this?” I whispered as soon as I closed my bedroom door.

  Just like this, Jonah responded, his words spoken through my subconscious.

  I glanced around my room, wishing he would just appear out of thin air at that very moment. “I just want to see you,” I said impatiently, still leaning against my door.

  I know. But you and I both know your mom will be up here any minute. She’s too excited you’re home to leave you alone up here for long.

  He was absolutely right. “Well, at least tell me where you are. It feels like you’re close.”

  I’m next to you. On your left.

  I smiled and strategically set my bags down in front of my door. “Just five minutes?” I tried to tempt him, unzipping my jacket and tossing it carelessly on my bed.

  You’re not playing fair.

  “Don’t talk to me about fair,” I muttered. “It isn’t fair that I don’t get to see you all of the time!”

  I just want to hold you right now.

  “Well, I’m not stopping you,” I said, biting my bottom lip to suppress my smile. I secretly knew I was winning the battle.

  Rather than continue to entice him with my verbal pleas, I decided to take it up a notch. I turned away, walking slowing toward my window as I swept my hair up into a ponytail, exposing my neck, which I knew would weaken his ability to stay away. Before I could fully draw the curtains over the window to block the outside world, his arms were wrapped around me, pulling me close.

  “You have no idea what you do to me.” His voice was soft and husky in my ear, it sent tingles down my spine.

  My heart swelled in my chest. I had never felt for anyone what I was feeling for Jonah and I couldn’t imagine ever feeling that way for anyone else. I had never really given much thought to what love would feel like, but I knew it had to feel as good and as real as what he and I had. And now, I had no doubt in my mind that it would be impossible to live without.

  I exhaled softly, leaning back against his broad chest, nuzzling into his neck. It had been a week of this, stealing every possible moment we could to be together, having secret conversations with each other, constantly craving one another’s touch and kisses. We simply couldn’t get enough. Time, of all things, had become our biggest enemy, as we never seemed to have enough of it to be satisfied.

  “I want you to meet my family,” I murmured.

  “I know your family,” he said gently, I could hear the smile in his voice.

  I couldn’t help but giggle, “Right. But they don’t know you.”

  “True.”

  I suddenly froze. “Do they know? My mom and Tom’s Guardians?”

  He shook his head slightly, “No.”

  “What are their names?” I asked out of idle curiosity.

  “Leo and Abram.” Jonah hesitated, “We have to be careful because they won’t like what’s going on between us.”

  “It’s our little secret,” I whispered, repositioning myself in his arms. I didn’t want to waste anymore time talking, our precious minutes together were quickly fading away.

  Kissing Jonah had become my favorite pass time, which was terribly embarrassing to admit. But the comfort of being in his arms and the tender way he looked at me between kisses made me feel so special and so loved. I could have spent every waking minute reliving the experience. It never took very long for the two of us to get caught up in the moment, leaving us both breathless and craving more.

  “Knock, knock,” my mom’s voice was muffled behind the door.

  Jonah and I tore apart from each other, smiles on our faces, excitement in our eyes. I had to fight the urge to giggle, the thrill of sneaking around was new to me. Jonah held his finger up to my lips to keep me from laughing, his eyes locked on mine. I leaned in on my tiptoes and kissed him softly one last time.

 
“See you soon,” he assured me.

  Thank God, I thought to myself, only giving him a nod. I didn’t trust my mouth enough to speak.

  My mom knocked again, “Need help unpacking?”

  I took a deep breath, trying to compose myself. “Hang on, mom!” I called out, but it was unnecessary. Jonah was already gone. I couldn’t wipe the grin off of my face as I lifted my bags away from the door and placed them on my bed. “You can come in,” I called over my shoulder as I unzipped my first bag, trying to look busy and calm, all at the same time. I turned to smile at my mom as she entered my room, wondering where Jonah was at that exact moment.

  “Are you feeling all right?” she asked immediately, “Your cheeks are flushed.”

  “I’m fine,” I assured her, reaching up instinctually, they definitely felt hot to the touch. I’d have to keep that in mind for future make out sessions while I was home.

  “I’m excited we get to have you for three whole weeks this time,” she smiled brightly. “I’m just sorry I still have to work while you’re home.”

  “I don’t mind,” I said too quickly. I wasn’t trying to hurt her feelings, so I quickly went on, “I’m looking forward to some alone time.” Alone time with Jonah, of course, but I definitely couldn’t say that.

  “Dorm living really isn’t your cup of tea, is it?” she asked, unloading a small stack of clothes from one of my bags.

  “Definitely not,” I said flatly, but I was thrilled she had brought it up. “In fact, I kind of wanted to talk to you about that. I’ve been saving almost all of my paychecks up from work, I think I’ll have enough by the end of school to cover a large portion of rent next year for an apartment. If I work all summer, I think I can make it work.”

  My mom smiled, “I had a feeling this conversation would come up.”

  “I know you want me to experience college living and all that. I get it, mom, I really do. But the whole dorm thing is literally making me crazy.”

  She smiled sympathetically, “Well, I think you’ll be happy to know that Tom and I already talked about an apartment for you next year. And as long as you find one that’s comparable to what we are paying for your dorm room, we’ll cover your rent next year.”

  Unable to believe my ears, I threw my arms around her neck and shrieked with excitement. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

  “Before you get too excited,” she laughed, hugging me back, “you’re still going to need a roommate to help you cover all of the other expenses.”

  “Shayne and I still want to live together,” I assured her. “We just need something bigger than a shoebox.”

  She nodded her agreement, “We can talk it over with Shayne’s parents, just to make sure that they’re okay with it. Maybe we can set a time to go apartment hunting over Spring Break.”

  I shrieked again, absolutely overjoyed. This was amazing news, especially for me and Jonah. We wouldn’t have to sneak around nearly as much and with Shayne’s chaotic lifestyle, it would almost be like living on my own anyway. Life just kept getting better and better.

  . . .

  Finding the time to be alone over the weekend was a complicated task. My mom had a thousand things she wanted to accomplish before Christmas and she insisted I do every single one of them with her and Aunt Nikki. This was all part of her guilt over having to work while I was home. I tried not to mind, but all I really wanted to do was escape with Jonah.

  As promised, he came to see me each night, after my mom and Tom retired to their bedroom. But the first two nights were lost, as my mother had run me ragged. Despite my best efforts to stay awake and talk to him, before I knew it, I was opening my eyes and it was morning.

  It wasn’t until that Monday that Jonah and I were able to have a prolonged amount of time together. No roommate, no parents, no classes, no disruptions. Just me and him.

  “It feels silly getting ready for you when I know you can see everything I’m doing anyway,” I muttered to Jonah as I stood at my dresser, deciding what to wear. I sighed softly to myself, choosing a cozy sweater and leggings. I didn’t bother drying my hair, instead I wore it up, just for him. After applying some mascara and lip gloss, I was more interested in seeing him than continuing to get ready.

  Jonah graciously waited until I said his name before showing up. When he did, he was standing near my window with his back turned to me. This caught me by surprise.

  “Why do you have your back to me?” I asked from across the room, still standing at my dresser.

  He turned his face to the side, but he didn’t look back at me. “I always turn away when you’re getting dressed. What you said got me thinking, though. I wanted to know what it would be like to do this the human way, not seeing you before actually getting here.”

  My heart melted. Oh how I loved him. “Close your eyes,” I instructed him, walking to where he stood. I clasped my hand in his and then guided him to my bedroom door. “Keep them closed,” I said, opening my door.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, smiling from ear to ear. His eyes still firmly shut.

  “Giving you exactly what you asked for. We’re doing this the human way. Walk forward three steps and when you hear my door close, you can open your eyes. Then I want you to knock on my door.”

  Before I released his hand, I had the sudden urge to surprise him with a kiss. He looked so handsome and what he had said was so sweet, I couldn’t help myself. Leaning up on my toes, I covered his eyes with my other hand, just in case, and softly pressed my lips to his.

  Jonah inhaled sharply, he clearly hadn’t been expecting my kiss. Saying nothing, he stepped out of my room, out into the hallway. I smiled to myself as I closed the door behind him, excitement bubbling up inside of me. Jonah made me feel more alive than I had ever been, he gave new meaning to everything.

  This didn’t feel like my life, it felt like a dream. Only I was very much awake. And very much in love.

  When he knocked softly on the door, I couldn’t contain my smile. Before I could get the door all the way open, or even say a word, Jonah had me pulled against him, one hand cupping my face, the other wrapped around the small of my back. He smothered me in sweet kisses from my mouth, down to my neck and back again. “That was absolute torture,” he murmured in my ear.

  “Now you definitely know what it feels like to be human. We call that anticipation,” I teased between kisses.

  “I call it unbearable,” his lips were on my temple, his hand softly cradling my cheek. “You are so beautiful, Hailey.”

  I blushed instantly, feeling embarrassed. His words sent butterflies fluttering in my tummy. “Thank you,” I mumbled, unable to say anything more.

  His hand drifted down the length of my chin, pulling it gently toward him so he could look at me. “I’m so grateful,” he said, his eyes smoldering into mine, piercing straight through to my soul. “Being here with you, like this... it’s more than I could have ever imagined.”

  My breath caught in my throat. It took me a moment to recover from the overwhelming flood of emotions his words had released within me, sending a trail of tingles with it. I could barely contain myself.

  “I’m the one who’s grateful, Jonah. I’ve never had anyone love me like this before.” I shook my head slowly, trying to think of the right words to convey exactly what I wanted to say to him. “The way you look at me, you really see who I am. When you talk to me, you speak right to my heart. When you hold me, you hold all of me. Your love knows no boundaries or limits, I feel that. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve being loved like this.”

  That was all it took for Jonah to scoop me up in his arms once again, feathering me with kisses. We remained there, in my room, for the next few hours, idly talking about random nothings and kissing. Lots of kissing. It was exactly the type of morning he and I had never been able to have. Quiet, comfortable and alone. With all of the chaos of classes, dance, living with Shayne and work, it left little time for Jonah and I to simply just be.

  “Come
on,” I finally said, taking him by the hand, pulling him off my bed.

  “Where are we going?” he asked reluctantly.

  “There’s an entire house for us to explore,” I encouraged him, still tugging on him.

  “I’ve already seen all of your house,” he reminded me as he followed me out the door.

  “Right,” I muttered. I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Jonah had been there, with me, every step of my life. It was too overwhelming to really rationalize, so I couldn’t think about it for too long or else it really started to mess with my mind. “So, do you ever actually go anywhere?” I asked, stopping halfway down the stairs.

  “What do you mean?” he asked in confusion.

  “Well, you said you’re always with me. Is that really true or do you sometimes go... off on your own?” I wasn’t quite sure where exactly he would go, so trying to formulate my question was proving to be difficult.

  “I can only go where you take me.”

  “Always?”

  “Always,” he confirmed, lifting just one corner of his mouth into a slight smirk.

  Jonah didn’t seem to mind my questions, so I continued. “So then, what do you do all of the time?”

  He shrugged slightly, “What I was created to do. Protect you. Guide you.”