The Stand-In: my life as an understudy

by Elizabeth Stevens

  “…somebody to you.” He finally paused and looked at me. “What?” he asked. “No?”

  I looked at him. “You know there are other ways to flirt with people.”

  “Firstly I don’t know what you mean. Secondly, if I did, I can’t be flirting with you because I said I wouldn’t.”

  “I believe the deal was you wouldn’t on purpose.”

  He nodded. “Therefore I can’t be blamed for singing to you.”

  I looked at him, hoping to convey all my exasperation with him, but it was difficult when I hadn’t actually hated it. “Really?”

  He nodded. “Really. Much like I can’t help my face, I also can’t help my love for song.” He leant further towards me and whispered, “It’s kind of my thing, you know.”

  “You don’t say?”

  “I really do, though. And I’m very good at it.”

  “Modest, too.”

  “Oh, very.” He threw me a cheeky grin.

  I pushed him away, but gently. “Well my thing is keeping my skin, so you stay over there with…your thing.”

  “That can’t be your only thing,” he said, resignedly shuffling his chair away again.

  “Making sure I still have my skin to keep all my insides…inside?”

  He nodded. “Yes.”

  We paused our conversation as some else came over to buy their tickets. The guy fist-bumped Eli, called me Ella, and said something about some concert before walking away again.

  I pulled open my book, but Eli nabbed it out of my grasp.

  “Excuse you,” I told him with a frown, but he was wearing a cheeky half-smirk that made it difficult to remember I was upset with him.

  “You’re not getting out of it that easily.”

  “Out of what?” I asked, hoping if I pretended not to know for long enough I could distract him.

  “Out of telling me more about you.”

  “There really isn’t all that much to tell you,” I said, lurching to get my book back, but he pulled it out of my reach and I had to put my hand on his knee to stop myself falling into him completely.

  I looked up and found our noses were much too close. But I didn’t move away just yet.

  “My book, Eli.” I left my hand on his knee and held my other palm up for him to put the book into.

  He leant closer and turned his face so my lips were next to his ear. “What’s the magic word, Chloe?” he asked.

  I tried and failed to keep a straight face as I said, “Brenda’s magic mushrooms.”

  He dissolved into laughter and I couldn’t help but join him. He looked at me, his honey eyes alight with humour, and I had that thudding and fluttering in my chest. Our laughter seemed to die simultaneously on our lips as we just looked at each other.

  “Chloe–” Eli started softly, but was interrupted by a much shriller shriek of my name.

  I jumped and pulled away from Eli guiltily, turning to the harpy. “Ella.” I nodded, then added quickly, “We were just talking about you.” If there was anything that Ella liked it was people talking about her.

  “We were?” Eli asked, then nodded when I kicked him under the table. “Yes. We were.”

  Ella looked down at me in every possible sense of the word, one hand on her hip, exposed even in the middle of winter, and the other up to keep her handbag in the crook of her arm. Lindy hovered next to her but a step behind like all good minions, glaring at me like Ella wasn’t doing a great job of it already.

  Eventually, Ella pulled her eyes off me and turned to Eli with a saccharine sweet smile. “Hi Elijah.”

  Eli nodded and I watched his body language change from comfortable and relaxed to smooth charmer. I hadn’t even realised he had another setting until I watched it happen in front of me.

  “Ella. Lindy. How are we this fine lunchtime?”

  Ella batted her eyes at him and bit her lip. There was absolutely nothing subtle about her. People on the moon would be able to see she was flirting with him. “Fine. How are you?”

  Eli leant an elbow on the table and smiled up at her. “Better for seeing you, gorgeous.”

  “That’s very sweet of you, Elijah,” she tittered. Yes the evil sister tittered. I partly wished I’d recorded it for Rica.

  Eli masterfully let his smile widen just a touch to make the implication of his next words crystal clear. “I hear you don’t have a date yet for the formal.”

  Ella nodded and pouted like she was some hard done by orphan in a Dickens novel. “No one’s asked me yet.”

  I managed not to ask her why she thought that was.

  Eli sat back in his chair. “Well, maybe that will change soon. Yeah…?”

  While one part of me was busy trying not to gag, the other was starting to believe that I was going to get to keep my skin after all. Especially the way Ella gushed at his words.

  “I hope so,” she said, batting her eyes again.

  Eli did his trademark chin kick towards her, his arms crossed nonchalantly. “I should probably finish up my shift. I’ll see you in music, yeah?”

  Ella licked her lip nauseatingly before she bit it. “Okay.” She gave him a little nose wrinkle in a silent ‘rawr’ for good measure and sashayed away.

  As soon as she was gone, I gave an involuntary, “Blergh,” and Eli turned to me with a humoured laugh.

  “What?”

  I shook my head. “Nothing.”

  “Not nothing. What?”

  I looked after my sister. “Just…her.”

  “You two really don’t get along, do you?”

  I looked at him sarcastically. “Oh, how did you guess?”

  He nodded. “Was that appropriate?”

  I frowned. “Nothing about what I just saw was appropriate. There are minors in the corridor, Elijah,” I chastised.

  He laughed. “No. I thought I was supposed to be purposefully flirting with her.”

  “Oh, you were flirting? I didn’t notice,” I said as I looked at my watch and saw it was two o’clock and the end of lunch. I pulled the float to me and started counting the takings.

  “Is this a reaction to her or are you jealous I flirted back?” he asked teasingly.

  I spared him a glare. “I’m not jealous, Eli.”

  I was actually surprised Govi didn’t just pop up with his ‘The lady doth,’ nonsense.

  “Wasn’t I supposed to…turn my attention to Ella?”

  I nodded. “Yes.”

  “So why are you in a shit?” he asked.

  When I didn’t answer, he took my arm gently and pulled me to face him.

  “Clo? Are you angry with me? Because I’m sorry if I did the wrong thing or…?”

  I shook my head. “No. I’m not angry with you. I just…” I sighed and flailed my hand in the direction Ella had gone. “Ella’s nice – or the closest to nice she ever gets – to everyone but me.” I huffed, partly in annoyance and partly in disbelief. “Oh my God, I sound like such a whiney bitch.” I pulled away from him and went back to the float.

  “She’s your sister, I get that it sucks.”

  I huffed again, humourlessly this time. “I don’t care. Not in the way I wish it was different anyway. I just… It pisses me off. Watching her be so false to people all the time like she thinks I’m too stupid to know better or something. Or maybe like she’s daring me to try to call her out on it and see what it gets me.” I shook my head. “I don’t know.”

  Eli was silent for a while. When he finally spoke, all he said was, “You know, you’re really selling this whole I should ask her to the formal thing.”

  I looked at him and couldn’t help but laugh with relief. “It’s my job to talk her up, keep you away from Milly and get you to ask her. She didn’t explicitly say which of her…qualities I was meant to talk up.”

  Eli sniggered, spraying the Peach Coke he’d just tipped into his mouth everywhere. “Fair.” He twisted the lid back on and tried to brush the majority of the liq
uid off himself. “I guess I appreciate the honesty?”

  I nodded. “Good people probably don’t rag all over their sisters, huh?” I asked.

  “I dunno…” he said slowly. “Good people tend not to sugar-coat shit for their friends.”

  “Literal shit or…?”

  He huffed a laugh. “Both. Either.”

  I nodded again. “Friends?” I looked at him askance.

  “You wouldn’t call us friends?”

  “I thought you didn’t flirt with friends?”

  He leant on his knees and looked at me thoughtfully. “Have you seen me and Lake together?” he asked cheekily.

  I smiled, but looked down to hide it. “Not enough obviously.”

  Eli reached over slowly and tipped my chin up with a gentle finger. He looked me over, his expression soft. A couple of times, he looked like he was going to say something but thought better of it. Finally, he pulled his hand back and said, “You never did tell me what your thing was.”

  I cleared my throat and tried to find something to busy myself with. “Uh, my thing?”

  “Yeah. Like my thing is music, remember?”

  I nodded. “I remember. I was hoping you didn’t.”

  “Well that much is obvious,” he chuckled.

  I took a deep breath, but just as I was about to answer, he spoke again.

  “You’re in Winters, so I want to say something arty. No one gets in without being arty. But I haven’t seen you do anything remotely arty except papier-mâché, so I’m going to have to guess not?”

  I sighed. “I don’t really have a thing.”

  “You must have a thing. Everyone has a thing.”

  I shrugged. “I guess not.”

  “A ha!” he cried. “Books! Almost every time I’ve seen you, you’ve had a book with you.”

  I grinned despite not wanting to encourage him. “I like reading, yeah.”

  “So you’re a writer!” he guessed, obviously thinking he’d guessed right.

  I frowned at him as I packed up the float. “No.”

  “What?”

  “You think everyone who reads must write as well?”

  He looked like he was thinking it through for a moment. “Well, I mean there’s the literal ability to write, and then the crafting of novels…”

  “I have zero skill in the latter.”

  “So not a writer, then.”

  I shook my head at him. “Decidedly not.”

  “But a reader,” he clarified and I nodded. “Okay. So… How did you get into Winters?”

  “The usual way.”

  “And yet you claim to have no things…?”

  I looked up at him as I stood up. “I have no things. I have books and Rica, and now the formal committee,” I amended. “Other than that, no things.”

  “What do you do for fun?”

  “Read.”

  “When you’re not reading?”

  I thought about it. “Watch movies.”

  “Any hobbies that don’t involve someone else’s creations?”

  I sighed as I thought some more. I made to nod, but then shook my head. “No.”

  “You don’t do anything except read, watch movies and work on papier-mâché trees?”

  “Okay, I have homework and my extra-curriculars.”

  “Ha! What extra-curriculars, then?”

  “Nothing I choose to do.”

  He groaned. “Fine. What’s your favourite subject then?”

  “Maths.”

  He blinked at me. “What?”

  I nodded. “I know,” I sighed. “I’m the weirdo at the specialist arts school who’d rather be at a normal school and focussing on maths.”

  “No. Look, each to their own. I’m just surprised.”

  “Surprised a girl likes maths?”

  “I didn’t realise maths had a gender preference. But no. You just don’t have that…maths vibe.”

  I turned to him. “And what vibe do I have?”

  He looked me over and shook his head. “I don’t know.” He got up, picking up his half-drunk Coke. “But it’s not maths.”

  “I don’t know if that’s a compliment or not,” I told him.

  He shrugged. “It wasn’t intended as anything.”

  “Does this mean we can’t be friends now?” I teased and he grinned.

  “Well, look. At the very least, I’ll have someone to help me with my budget when I’m rich and famous,” he chuckled.

  “Isn’t the goal to be so disgustingly rich that you don’t need to budget?”

  “Oh, you’re familiar with the rich and famous dream, then. Are you?” he joked.

  “I know of it, yes.”

  His smile was more sincere now. “It’s kind of hard not to in a place like this.”

  “Yeah, but there are the dreamers and then there’s you, Govi, Lake and Ramsey, actually on the brink of stardom.”

  He shrugged, looking away almost like he was a little embarrassed. “There are unfortunately no guarantees in this life.”

  “Well if it doesn’t work out, you can come and teach at my music school,” I offered.

  He smiled. “You’re going to have a music school, are you?”

  I nodded. “If the whole Commerce things flops.”

  He nodded thoughtfully. “Sensible to have a backup.”

  “Very.”

  “And you never know when someone will want to learn the triangle. And from a maestro, no less.”

  I snorted. “Very true. Although I did picture myself the old spinster piano ma’am.”

  Eli pointed at me. “Oh, I know that one. Everyone hates her and wonders who pissed in her coffee?”

  I nodded. “The very same.”

  He put his hands in his pockets, cradling the Coke bottle under his arm. “You know what they say, aim for the moon and even if you miss you’ll land among the stars.”

  I grinned, deciding not to inform him that the moon was in fact closer to earth than any star. “Exactly.”

  He nodded again. “Good plan.”

  “Yo, dude there you are!” Govi called, grinning as he came over to us. “We’ve got English and Old Tom told me to hurry your arse up.”

  Eli looked at me and I had a little trouble deciphering his expression. He almost looked like he didn’t want to leave me, but I wasn’t sure if he wanted to continue our conversation or if it was because he didn’t want me thinking he was shirking his responsibilities.

  I held up the float. “All good. I have a break, so I’ll take this back for Milly.”

  He nodded. “Oh, okay.”

  “See you this afternoon, Gin!” Govi called as he grabbed Eli’s collar and started dragging him away.

  “Yep. See ya,” I replied.

  I stood in the hallway for a few moments longer, then pulled myself together and hurried off to the auditorium.

  So not interested

  On Wednesday, Lake and Ramsey decided to come to the committee meeting again, much to Milly’s chagrin. I walked in to find all the Quicksilver boys on the stage again, playing while Milly was rushing around trying to keep everyone focussed on their tasks at hand and not breaking out into impromptu dance.

  I gave the boys a return wave as I headed to our table and tried not to smile too hard at Govi’s animated drumming. The guy just looked so happy, it was hard not to feel happy when you saw him. But then, Govi pretty well always looked so happy.

  I dropped my bag and my jacket on a chair and rolled up my sleeves, unconsciously singing along as the band played ‘Shut Up and Dance’, before mixing up some more papier-mâché mix so I could get a start on the trees while Eli and Govi were practising. From what I’d gathered, there was still a lot of argument over the set list. With the formal being a run-through for them – not that they hadn’t played gigs before – the nerves seemed to be setting in and making them feel like nothing was good enough.

  With the papier-mâ
ché mix all finished, I turned to get started and nearly ran into Lindy. If I’d been a faster sort of girl, I would have ‘accidentally’ spilled it down the front of her no doubt very expensive crop top and jeans combination.

  “Argh,” I yelped. “Lindy. Hi. Can I help you with anything?”

  She looked me over suspiciously and I wondered what in the seven hells I was supposed to have done now. Or not done, maybe…

  I could see why she might have been sent to get on my case.

  “Elijah and Ella,” she answered, confirming my presumptions.

  I nodded. “What about them?”

  “Why hasn’t he asked her to the formal yet?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know,” I told her, my eyes sliding to look at Eli up on stage. “I’ve been talking her up, but I can’t just be totally obvious about these things. Ella wants it to be Eli’s idea, right?”

  Lindy looked like she had no idea but, since I sounded so confident, then that must be right. “Of course she does.”

  “Exactly. She doesn’t want him to ask her because he was told to, does she?” I said as though it was obvious.

  “No,” Lindy scoffed, then frowned as though she was trying to work out if that was right or not. “No?”

  “No,” I encouraged. “So let me work on it.”

  “He’d better ask her by the end of the week.” I wasn’t sure what the ‘or else’ was going to be, but I was going to try to avoid if it I could. Then surprisingly, Lindy leant into me and whispered, “People who don’t get asked look pathetic. And Ella doesn’t want to look…”

  “Pathetic?” I offered when she didn’t continue.

  Lindy winked. “So you understand the mission?”

  I blinked at her, wondering at the sense in reminding her I’d been ‘on the mission’ for coming up to three weeks now. But I was saved having to make a decision when Milly’s voice floated over.

  “Lindy, is there something else you should be doing?”

  Lindy jumped then frowned. “Stupid Milly Wallis thinking she’s in charge.”

  I kept my face as neutral as possible. “She… She is in charge, Lindy. She’s…head of the committee…” I said slowly and as calmly as possible.

  Lindy flicked her head back. “Until Ella arrives.”

  I didn’t need to wonder if I should tell her that wasn’t how it worked, I just asked politely, “And when will that be?”