The Underwear Dare: Nerd vs. Bully!

by Sisters, The Nardini

  As soon as we turned around the rumors began.

  “I wonder what happened?” Chelsea asked.

  “Probably an oven fire. My guess is that the kitchen wasn’t up to code.” Marina said.

  “Do you even know what that means?” Manny asked.

  “No, not really, but it makes sense,” Marina answered.

  “I bet it was a water leak and the lunch ladies are in there swimming around trying to make sandwiches,” Eddie said.

  “Nothing worse than a soggy sandwich,” Paul added.

  Before I could contribute a scenario, we all heard the unmistakable far-off wail of an ambulance. Everyone froze. Hearing that siren could only mean one thing; something very serious happened in the cafetorium.

  “Everyone, please keep moving.” Ms. Waverly was practically pushing us into our room.

  Once we were all back inside, Ms. Waverly closed the door. We all moved our desks into our normal lunch time cluster.

  “Do you think one of the lunch ladies died?” Paul asked.

  “Yeah, I hope it wasn’t Miss Betty. She always gave me extra mashed potatoes.” Eddie said.

  “It could be Miss Yvette, she’s really old. Once she told me I reminded her of her grandson. So that must make her about eighty or so,” Manny said.

  I wanted to add something but all I could think about was how lucky I was that the cafetorium was closed today.

  “Miss Yvette has the same hair color as Ms. Waverly,” Chelsea said, and then looked at Eddie. “Do you think Miss Waverly is eighty?”

  All our eyes were on Eddie.

  “How would I know?” He said.

  “Because you seem to have a special interest in her lately,” Marina said.

  Everyone laughed except Eddie. Luckily for him, there was a knock on the door and the room grew quiet. His moment of getting teased was over fast. Ms. Waverly opened the door for Ms. Behr. She was carrying a huge tray full of sandwiches and small cartons of milk. Regular and chocolate. Ms. Behr placed the tray on Ms. Waverly’s desk and hurried out.

  “Please come up and get a sandwich and milk if you didn’t bring your lunch.” Ms. Waverly had to shout because the sirens were getting closer.

  A few kids sauntered up to her desk. Not many kids ate the school lunch unless it was a really good menu. Today was turkey surprise which was not that popular. If this would have happened on Friday, it would have been a major crisis. Friday is always pizza day. Everyone eats school lunch that day.

  “Okay, it looks like we have some milk and sandwiches left over. If anybody wants some, feel free to come up,” Ms. Waverly announced.

  Eddie, Paul, Manny and I all jumped up. Marina and Chelsea didn’t move. I grabbed a chocolate milk. I saw Eddie swipe a couple of sandwiches. The siren was blaring and we could see the ambulance lights flashing and flickering across the room. A few kids got up to look through the windows, but Ms. Waverly made them sit down.

  As soon as they sat down, the siren went dead. But the lights continued to shine around the room. It was a bit eerie.

  As I sipped my milk, I watched Eddie munch down on his sandwich. He could be quite the messy eater.

  “Hey, Josh. I guess we weren’t so lucky after all.” He wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve.

  “I suppose not,” I said.

  Eddie raised his hand.

  “Yes, Eddie?” Ms. Waverly said.

  “Did you know that the word ambulance is always spelled backwards on the front of the ambulance?” He asked her.

  “Yes, I did. But I bet some of your classmates didn’t know that. Do you know why it is spelled backwards?”

  “Yeah, it’s backwards so if you’re driving and you look in your rear-view mirror it looks normal. Then you can see it and get out of the way.”

  The class looked skeptical. “That’s absolutely right, Eddie,” Ms. Waverly said smiling.

  We all sprung out of our seats and scurried to the windows. He was right. Eddie was right! In big, bold letters the word was splashed across the front of the ambulance.

  A crowd was forming around Eddie and I could hear comments like; awesome, cool and he’s right! My guess was that he watched a show on television about emergency transport vehicles.

  But before Eddie could dazzle the crowd with more information, we all saw Miss Betty on a stretcher. She was being wheeled into the back of the ambulance. Her leg looked crooked and a make-shift splint had been placed around it.

  “Oh no, not Miss Betty,” Eddie said.

  “Well, at least she’s alive,” Paul said.

  “That’s good,” Manny said.

  “Yeah, but no more extra potatoes,” Eddie said sadly. “I guess it wasn’t her lucky day either, huh, Josh?”

  “I guess not,” I said, but it sure turned out to be mine. I was safe for another day.

  CHAPTER 15

  Weird flashes of light bounced around the attic room early Wednesday morning. I looked at my alarm clock. I still had thirty minutes left to sleep. I peered over at Eddie’s mattress. It was empty except for piles of sheets and blankets all wrapped up in a heap. How does he sleep in that mess? Another flash of light and then I heard the soft tapping of a hammer. I raced to the light switch and in a moment the room was flooded in brightness.

  There stood Eddie, in his pajamas, balancing on a chair that was propped up against the wall. He was holding a small hammer in one hand and the end of his eagle poster in the other. In his mouth was a small flashlight. That explained the weird flashes.

  “Dang, Josh. You almost made me fall.” He continued to nail the last corner of the poster to the wall. TAP, TAP, TAP, went the miniature hammer.

  “What are you doing?” I asked, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I couldn’t believe Eddie was so awake. I usually had to shake him up every morning. And there he was, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as my dad would say, decorating the attic with more of his stuff.

  “What’s it look like I’m doing? I’m hanging up my poster.”

  “It’s not your room yet,” I said.

  “It’s not yours either but that didn’t stop you from hanging up those stupid math flash card things on the wall next to your desk.”

  “Those are for studying.” I had my dad help me move my desk up yesterday. I told him it was quieter for studying up in the attic. I don’t think he believed me. And then he helped Eddie move his desk up, too. No fair.

  “Well, this eagle poster helps me study.”

  I surveyed my surroundings. It just dawned on me that both Eddie and I had been secretly hauling all our stuff upstairs. The only stuff left in our old room were our dressers, nightstands and the bunk-bed frame. The attic appeared very lived in already. Eddie’s games, music and electronics were scattered all over the place and my books were all perfectly stacked and in alphabetical order. I hated to admit it but the last couple of nights we’d been playing video games against each other before lights out and it was fun. I even won a couple of times.

  My thoughts went back to Eddie and his poster, which did look great on the wall. “Why are you up so early, couldn’t this have waited ‘til after school?”

  “I’m so glad you asked, Josh. I couldn’t wait because today is the day I win the bet. I wanted to get an early start on what will forever be known as Eddie’s Attic Triumph or E.A.T., if you will,” he boasted.

  “You do know that spells eat, right?”

  “Oh, I might have to rethink that. Anyway, I really didn’t mean to wake you, but since you’re up, could you give me a hand with my nightstand. I’d like to get it in place this morning. It’s too heavy to move by myself, I’ve already tried.”

  “Okay, but we have to move mine too, because I’m going to win today,” I said.

  “Fine, we’ll bring them both up but after school one of them will be going right back down the stairs.”

  “Fine,” I said.

  “Double fine,” he replied.

  * * *

  The entire cafetorium was buzzing wit
h chatter except for our table.

  “You’re awfully quiet today,” Marina said to Eddie.

  “Yeah, did you finally run out of stories?” Manny asked.

  Eddie ignored them. Only I knew why he was so quiet. He was devising his plan to run practically naked across the stage in a matter of minutes. Part of me hoped he wouldn’t go through with it but I saw the determination on his face and knew he would. It was me who couldn’t go through with it. Not yet, anyway. But I wasn’t ready for Eddie to win yet. I needed a plan to stop him. And it had to be fool-proof.

  “Hey, Josh. Want my chocolate milk?” Paul asked.

  That’s it! Chocolate milk. It was so easy. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner.

  “Um, sure,” I said. I caught the milk that Paul hurled at me with one hand. Marina and Chelsea looked impressed. To bad Eddie missed it, he would have approved. He was still off in his own world and hadn’t yet contributed to our lunchtime banter.

  “Thanks,” I said.

  Time to put my plan into motion. All I had to do was wait for Eddie to make his move. And as if reading my mind, Eddie came back to life bringing with him a bright spark to our dull group.

  “And by the way,” Eddie started as if he’d been part of the conversation all along, “No, I haven’t run out of stories. I have billions. As a matter of fact, in a few moments you will witness the birth of a new legend. This story is about the bravest student that ever walked the halls of this elementary school.”

  All eyes were glued on Eddie. I tried to act as normal as I could while I carefully opened my carton of chocolate milk.

  “Who?” Paul asked.

  “Just be patient,” Eddie said as he slid his lunch to the center of the table and slowly pushed back his chair.

  It was time. Eddie was getting ready to leave us. He looked at the stage. Here he would find his glory and the school would witness a new era of bravado. It was now or never.

  I started making several, fake, puny sneezes that led to beefier and louder sneezes. All the eyes that were focused on Eddie shifted in my direction. I had to make them all believe I was having a sneezing attack for my plan to work.

  “Are you okay?” Marina asked concerned.

  “Maybe you should drink some water,” Chelsea added.

  “He doesn’t have the hiccups, he has the sneezes. Water won’t work,” Manny said.

  Good. My plan was working. They believed me. Now for the finale! A sneeze that would blow away all of the sneezes in the world.

  “AH, AH, AH, CHOOOOO!!!”

  As I overacted my award-winning sneeze I violently thrust my body sideways, spilling my entire carton of chocolate milk right into Eddie’s lap. Gooey, chocolaty goodness sloshed between Eddie’s legs and pooled around his bottom. I did it!

  Eddie jumped up like his pants were on fire. Now everyone could see the muddy-brown stains across the front and back of his pants. “Josh, you did that on purpose!”

  “No, I didn’t. I was having a sneezing attack. Thank you very much,” I said.

  “You sure do seem okay now,” he said through clenched teeth.

  “Yeah, I just needed to get it out of my system,” I told him.

  “Is everything alright here?” Mr. Duff asked as he made his way to our table.

  “Um, Josh had a sneezing attack and accidentally spilled his milk on Eddie,” Marina said softly.

  Mr. Duff looked at Eddie and then at Eddie’s pants. “Is that right, Eddie? Was it an accident?”

  Eddie calmed himself down and said, “Yeah, just an accident.”

  “Okay, would you like to go to my office and call your mom to bring you new pants?” Mr. Duff asked Eddie.

  “Naw, I’ll be alright. They’ll dry in a while. Thanks,” Eddie said.

  “Okay, then. Josh, please be more careful when you sneeze,” Mr. Duff said looking straight at me. I could tell he didn’t think it was an accident.

  “Sure thing, Mr. Duff, I’ll try,” I mumbled.

  Eddie grabbed another chair since his was still sticky from the milk. He leaned close to me and whispered, “Nice going. I can’t run across the stage now. It will look like I pooped my pants because of the chocolate stains. But don’t worry; I will be ready for you tomorrow. Nothing will stop me, that room is mine.”

  I actually felt a shiver go down my spine. I scooted away from Eddie.

  “So, did I ever tell you guys about the time I got lost in a pet store and a ferret helped me find my way out?” Eddie was back to his storytelling like nothing had happened.

  * * *

  Eddie slurped his cereal at breakfast on Thursday morning. How could he eat? I was so nervous, I could barely force down a little oatmeal.

  “This is the day,” he said in between spoonfuls of milk and Cheerios.

  We heard the bus pull up. Eddie sprinted for the door grabbing his backpack and jacket in one quick motion. I fumbled for mine and wished I was as coordinated as Eddie.

  Eddie was his usual self all the way to school. Completely at ease and telling gross-out stories all the way there. I felt like I was going to vomit.

  When I walked into the classroom, Ms. Waverly looked at me and furrowed her brow. “Is everything alright, Josh?” she asked. “You look a bit pale.”

  “I’m fine,” I mumbled and could tell she wasn’t convinced.

  All through the morning, my stomach grew queasier and queasier. I even burped a little throw-up in my mouth. I knew it was just nerves, but I couldn’t help it.

  Eddie sat at his desk, staring off into space. Every once in a while he would solve a math problem on his worksheet. He seemed super relaxed.

  As we were getting ready to line up for lunch, Ms. Behr popped into the room.

  “Ms. Waverly, I have a special treat for Josh and Eddie today. I thought since they missed their session with me yesterday due to a meeting I had, that I would invite them to eat lunch with me today in my office.”

  “What?” Eddie said a little too loud. Ms. Behr took it to mean he was excited for the privilege of eating lunch with her. Little did she know what we had planned to do in the cafetorium today.

  My stomach felt better instantly. In fact, I was kind of hungry. Eddie looked beaten.

  “Come on, boys. Grab your lunches and we’ll have a nice long chat,” she said as we followed her out the door.

  * * *

  Ms. Behr moved a small table in the middle of the rocking chairs for our lunches. She nibbled on a turkey sandwich and potato chips. Eddie and I had our usual sandwiches and carrot sticks. Ms Behr wiped her mouth with a napkin and began packing up her lunch.

  “Ms Behr, I have a very important question to ask you. I hope it’s not too personal,” Eddie said.

  Pure delight washed over Ms. Behr’s face. Maybe she thought Eddie was about to have a breakthrough. “Please, ask you question,” she said with great enthusiasm.

  “Well, I was just wondering…” Eddie trailed off.

  “This is a safe place Eddie. You can ask whatever you want.”

  “Are you going to finish those chips? If not, I wouldn’t mind having a few,” Eddie said.

  “Oh,” she said and looked disappointed. “Help yourself.”

  Eddie munched happily on the chips.

  “Now, boys I have something very important to share with you,” she said and pulled out the index cards we’d filled out last Friday. “I noticed something very interesting about these cards. Let me share them with you. Or better yet, how about you share them with each other.”

  She handed each of us a card face down and told us not to turn it over until she said so.

  “Josh, in your hand you hold the card that Eddie filled out when I asked him what he really liked about you. Eddie, you have the card Josh filled with the same question. Josh, can you tell me what Eddie wrote about you?” she asked.

  I turned the card over and read it aloud, “Josh is good at making friends.” I smiled at Eddie. He just nodded.

  “Now it’s
your turn, Eddie.” Ms. Behr said.

  Eddie turned his card over and said, “Eddie is good at sports.” He grinned. “Hey, that’s true, I am good at sports.”

  “Now let me give you boys the other two cards. These are the cards where you wrote what you wished each other was better at.” She handed us each the other card. “Eddie, read your card first this time. What did Josh write about you?”

  Eddie turned the card over. “I wish Eddie was better at making friends.” Eddie looked surprised. “That’s weird!”

  “You think that’s weird, let Josh read his card. Go ahead Josh. Find out what Eddie wishes you were better at.”

  I turned my card over and read, “I wish Josh was better at sports. That’s freaky!”

  “It seems you boys know each other much better than you thought. What can you do with this information you have learned?” she asked.

  “I know,” Eddie said. “I could coach Josh and give him some pointers on how to be better in sports. Then we could play together more. I always wanted to play with him. Ever since kindergarten, but he never seemed interested.”

  “What?” I cried. “You’ve been picking on me since kindergarten.”

  “Because you never wanted to play with me. You were the kid all the other kids liked. And you were nice to everyone. Except me,” he added and looked sad.

  “That’s crazy. You were mean to me from the first day!”

  “No, I wasn’t. I remember the first day of kindergarten I asked you to share the blocks with me so we could play together. You said you were building a tower and needed all the blocks for yourself. So see, you started it.”

  “You knocked the blocks over! How is that being a good friend?”

  “I thought if I knocked them over, we could rebuild the tower together.”

  I sat quietly for a minute. For some reason, Eddie’s dad kept popping up into my brain. I remembered how rough he was with me that one time I met him. Maybe Eddie’s dad taught him to be rough instead of nice. Maybe that’s why he had a hard time making friends. Until now. Eddie had friends now. He had my friends. Before I could tell him off for stealing my friends, Eddie interrupted.