Who We Were

by Christy Sloat

  I did say that didn’t I? “Oh yeah, I mean I do. But it’s not my favorite thing to do on a Friday night.”

  “So what would you rather do?” He seemed to get closer to me, but I didn’t see him move. He ran his fingers through his spiky hair. It had a mind of its own, his hair. It was naturally spiked without gel while his brother’s hair was unruly and slightly curly. I wanted to touch Nash’s hair and perhaps run my own fingers through it.

  I tried to focus on his question, but his pure beauty was making that really hard.

  “I like to watch movies. I read a lot too,” I said lamely. He probably thought reading was archaic and movies were boring. If I had to guess, I’d say Nash’s life was a constant party. That and football.

  “I try to avoid books if I can,” he laughed. I was right. “But I love going to the movies. My favorite movie is Thor.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. Of course his favorite movie was about a bad-ass wielding a hammer.

  “What’s so funny? Are you laughing at Thor?” He joked.

  “Yes, actually I am.”

  He leaned into me and tickled my stomach. I flew back and laughed. He knew exactly where to tickle me too. “Thor is a barbarian,” I said when he stopped. That seemed to get him going, and he lifted me up and carried me to the grass. He straddled me and pinned my helpless arms under his knees. Damn he was strong!

  “Now, say Thor is a god, and I will not tickle you,” he ordered.

  I shook my head. “Nope. I won’t say it.”

  “I warned you, Sadie.” He went straight for the soft spot of my belly and tickled me until I thought I was going to cry. When he stopped and looked up, I turned my head to see what distracted our tickle fest. It was Kyleigh speed walking toward us. Nash let my hands free and leaned back into the grass. I rolled over and sat up.

  “Sadie,” she said when she reached us. She was out of breath and held out a finger asking for a minute. “Your little friend, Leslie, she said to come get you. She’s sick.”

  “Lily?”

  “Yeah, she did a whole shit load of shots and a keg stand. She fell on the ground, and now she’s puking. She can’t even stand up.”

  Seven

  I flew to my feet and ran as fast as I could back to the party. I instantly saw her on the ground while everyone stood around her. Oliver was standing with a group of onlookers, instead of on the ground holding her hand. She rolled over and met my eyes. I saw the tears running down her face, streaking thick black lines through her rosy cheeks. She tried to get up, but failed.

  I reached her before her head fell back to the ground. Catching her head in my hands, her eyes rolled back into her head. “Call an ambulance, now!” I shouted. People just stared at me like I had two heads. I found Oliver in the crowd and gave him the death stare. “Oliver. Get out your phone and dial 911. Tell them to come here. Do I need to write down instructions?”

  He shook his head like this was a bad dream. He didn’t pull out his phone, and he didn’t answer me. Instead he turned and walked back into the house. What was wrong with these people?

  “I called.” Nolan came forward holding his cell phone to his ear. “They’re on their way here right now. The guy on the line says to make sure she doesn’t choke on her vomit, so turn her on her side.”

  I did what he said and easily turned Lily on her side. She seemed so fragile, like a little injured bird. Her eyes closed, and her breathing slowed.

  “She’s not breathing right,” I cried. I hadn’t realized I was crying until that moment. I was scared out of my mind. Nolan repeated my words to the dispatcher.

  “He said the ambulance is on the street. Everyone back off!”

  I looked up to see people scattering at Nolan’s orders. They were taking off in all directions. The sounds of the sirens were apparently scaring all the drunkards off, except Kyleigh, who knelt next to me and held Lily’s wrist.

  “Her pulse is slow. She is not doing so well,” she whispered to me. I felt so helpless. The minutes that it took the EMT’s to reach the backyard were more like hours in my panicked mind. Would my best friend die right here in my hands?

  I felt someone pulling me away from her. What’s going on? I was so out of it, and I wasn’t even drinking. All I knew was people were surrounding Lily, and I was being pulled away from my best friend. Would I see her again?

  Arms wrapped around me, and I turned and cried into that person’s chest. Nash. I looked up, no, Nolan.

  “It’s going to be okay, Sadie. They got here fast. She’ll be okay,” he said tenderly.

  “Want me to drive you to the hospital?” Kyleigh asked, sounding so far away. I nodded.

  ***

  I paced the hospital waiting room. I wasn’t allowed back in the room where they held Lily because I wasn’t family; and they wouldn’t tell me how she was. Her mom had come, and her dad asked me a million questions. I answered all of them to the best of knowledge, but the fact was I didn’t know why she drank or what she drank. I wasn’t with her. I didn’t have all the facts because I left her to hang out with Nash, who by the way hadn’t called or texted to see where I was or how Lily was. He wasn’t anywhere to be found when I left either. Kyleigh drove me here, and she remained with me. She answered a lot of Mr. Chavez’s questions for me, filling in all the blanks I left.

  “Sadie, I should get you home,” Kyleigh suggested. “It’s really late, I’m exhausted, and there is nothing you can do for her here.”

  She was right. I knew I couldn’t help Lily right now. Her parents were here, and I was just wearing the floor down with my shoes. I wasn’t doing anyone any good.

  “Okay. Let’s go.” I looked once more at the door they wheeled Lily in, hoping she would come out all bright eyed and happy. But no one came out.

  Kyleigh unlocked the doors to her black sedan. I should have known the make and model, because I loved nice cars, but I was too tired to care. I flopped into the warm seat and leaned my head on the window. She took off and drove me back to my car on Oliver’s street.

  “You gonna be okay?” she asked concerned. I nodded.

  “I don’t drink alcohol because I hate it,” I confessed. “I’ve seen my mom go through stuff like this before.” Why was I telling her that? I asked myself. It was because I needed a friend. “My mom used to drink so much that she’d fall asleep on the bathroom floor with no recollection of how she got there. Sometimes she’d be so hungover that she’d call in sick. She almost lost her job because she smelled like a brewery.”

  “She ever end up in a hospital?”

  “She checked into a rehab for a bit.”

  I had to stay with my dad for that month. I hated it. He took me to the LR every day because he didn’t know what else to do with me. Sometimes I wondered if he knew how to take care of a child. Finally, my mom checked out after her thirty days. I had lost nine pound due to lack of eating. She looked fantastic, and I looked malnourished.

  “She’s better now, but that’s why I don’t drink,” I said finally. “Lily isn’t like that. She never drinks like that.”

  Kyleigh nodded, and suddenly looked at me seriously. “The way she downed those shots and how she handled that keg, I’d say she knew exactly what she was doing. She’s not a pro, but she’s no stranger to partying.”

  I tried to imagine where Lily would learn to drink like that. We were always together, inseparable even. It had me wondering how much I really knew about my best friend and how much she was hiding from me.

  Kyleigh hugged me, and I hugged her back. I bit back the tears that were ready to come forth.

  “Listen, text me tomorrow and let me know how she’s doing. I’m going to this concert in the park if you wanna come with? It will help get your mind off things,” she suggested.

  I pulled away and said, “I’ll let you know. Thank you.”

  “Sure. Drive safe.” I got out and pulled my car key out of my bra.

  “And Sadie,” she called after me.

  “Yeah?
”

  “I think it’s honorable that you don’t drink.” She pulled away leaving me standing on the quiet street alone.

  ***

  The next morning I had no phone calls about Lily’s condition, and when I called her phone, no one answered. I was absolutely miserable.

  Things with my mom were better than the night before. We talked, and actually talked nicely, instead of yelling. My mom listened when I told her about Lily, and she was shocked. “I never thought Lily would do anything like that.”

  After I promised to never do anything foolish like that with alcohol, my mom sent me to my room. I wasn’t grounded exactly. She just wanted me to think about what I did to her. So I did, kind of.

  I knew I had to read three chapters of Dorian Gray this weekend. So I pulled out the beat up book and curled up on my window seat. With the window cracked open, I could feel a slight breeze pick up and blow in.

  I quickly learned that poor Dorian came from a loveless family. He was raised by a tyrant, Lord Henry, but that tyrant taught Dorian about seeking beauty and the finer things in life. Dorian begins to change and become molded by thoughts of others. He becomes vain, he becomes selfish, and he is like a puppet to Lord Henry.

  By chapter four I was completely disgusted with the way the book was going. I threw the book on the bookshelf and checked my phone. Still no text from Lily, but there was one from Nash. I almost squealed with delight.

  Nash- How’s your friend? Is she going to be okay?

  Me- She’s in the hospital. I think. I haven’t heard anything this morning.

  I wanted to tell him to thank his brother for me. He was the one, the only one, to act responsibly last night. But I didn’t.

  Nash- I’m sorry that I took off last night. I’d like to have a chance to explain to you in person why I did …

  Me- When?

  I waited several minutes for his reply and got nothing. Instead I got a rapping on my window. I turned quickly, frightened, to see Nash standing outside. I hurried to open the screen so he could climb in. He barely made it through without hurdling to the floor. His tall body wasn’t fluid and graceful, that’s for sure.

  “What are you doing here? And how did you know where I lived?” I whispered.

  “I have my ways, Sadie,” he said smoothly. “These are for you.”

  He held up a bouquet of flowers that were wilting slowly from the day’s heat. I took them and said, “I’ll be right back.” I snuck out of my room and into the bathroom where I found a small cup and filled it with water. I brought the flowers back and set them on my dresser.

  “They needed water, huh?” Nash asked as he sat on my unmade bed. I suddenly realized he was seeing my messy room. I wished for once I had cleaned it.

  “So, you came to talk to me?”

  I wanted to know why he took off last night. It wasn’t the only thing that bothered me about last night, but it was one of the major things. We’d been flirting, and I thought we were getting along. Then, like most of the losers at the party, he took off.

  He sat back on my bed and laid his head on my pillows. He looked so odd in my small bed. Sure I was tall, but he was even taller.

  “My mom died last year,” he admitted. “She died of cancer. I didn’t mean to freak out last night, but it’s just that whenever I see someone sick, I think of her again.”

  I was dumbfounded. What do you say when you hear something like that. I’m sorry? I’m sure everyone said that to him already.

  “No one deserves to lose someone.” It was the only true statement I could say.

  “No, they don’t.” He looked up at my ceiling and not at me. I could see the overwhelming sadness in his eyes. Then he turned and looked right at me. “But no one deserves to be left alone to deal with their sick friend, either.”

  “I wasn’t alone … your brother was there to help, and so was Kyleigh.”

  “My brother?”

  I nodded. I guess he didn’t know Nolan was still at the party. I suppose he thought Nolan took off like he did.

  “Huh, well, I gotta give it to the kid; he’s got a good head on his shoulders.” He sat up and looked at my clock radio. “Oh crap. I have practice in thirty minutes.”

  “Practice on a Saturday?” I questioned.

  “Yep. Gotta stay in shape and be ready for football season. There’s no rest for the wicked and all that,” he laughed. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

  Not until Monday?

  “Are you busy tomorrow?”

  “Yeah. Practice.”

  I didn’t know anything about football, but I was confused by why they practiced all weekend long, especially during the summer. Didn’t they get a break?

  “Sadie, I’d like nothing more than to hang out with you all weekend long, but football takes up a big chunk of my life. Now that we’re back on the team, I basically have no life. The only time I’ll be able to hang out with you is at school and maybe on Friday nights,” he said as he started toward my window. He stopped and caressed my face. “But don’t give up on me, ‘kay?”

  How could I say no? He was busy. I could understand that. His passion was ball, and I couldn’t blame him for wanting to be great at it.

  “I understand. I do. I just want to get to know you better is all.” I decided honesty was the best policy.

  “It’s just a shame that we didn’t get more time together last night.” He ran his finger over my hand. It felt nice to be touched, but I had to focus on my next question.

  “Yeah, I know. Hey, what happened to Oliver last night?” I asked. I wanted to know where Oliver was when Lily needed help, why he ran off like he did.

  “I actually have no idea, why?” He pulled his hand away.

  I told him how Oliver took off like I was holding a gun to his head when I asked for his help. He nodded and shrugged his shoulders, saying, “I can’t be responsible for Oli’s actions just like you can’t be for Lily’s.”

  I stepped back a second, wounded. No I couldn’t be responsible for Lily, but was I? Was it my fault that she drank like she did? If I had been there with her, maybe she wouldn’t have ended up in the hospital. I could have stopped her.

  “You know I’m right. But if it makes you feel any better, I’ll ask him today,” he said kindly. “And I’m sorry I took off when you needed me. I’m not a jerk, I promise.”

  He caressed my face slightly and the leaned in close. “I really like you, Sadie. I want to get to know you better too. I think you’re what I need in my life.”

  I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath until his lips were on my forehead giving it a breathy kiss. I breathed in his scent. He sighed into my hair and indecorously pulled away way too fast. I wanted more of Nash. I wanted to pull him to me, lie down on my bed, and kiss the afternoon away. I’d never felt like this around any other guy. The urges I had when I was around him, I’ve never had for another. Why didn’t he kiss me like I wanted him too? Why go for the forehead and not the lips?

  Before I could grasp onto him, he was through my window and out of my sight, leaving me standing breathless once again.

  Eight

  After Nash left me alone in my room, I texted Kyleigh. She was already getting dressed for the concert and gave me directions to get there. Somehow my saying that I was going to a concert at the park to get my mind off Lily worked on my mom, and it was the truth. She knew I needed to get out of the house since no one answered the home phone at Lily’s and Lily wasn’t responding to my calls. I was literally going crazy, and I didn’t know what I would have been like if Nash didn’t come and distract me for that small bit.

  I pulled out a yellow skirt with eyelet trim and a white top with a thin sweater. My strappy white sandals made my legs look even paler than normal. I wasn’t getting the sun time in that I normally did in the summer now that I was in school. My tan wasn’t back yet. I mentally made myself a promise to hit the lake tomorrow and soak up some much needed rays.

  The park was in the center of town and
easy to get to from my house. I haven’t seen a concert in the park since my parents were together, so this was bringing back memories of a family that I didn’t have any longer. I walked in the entrance and found that nothing much about this had changed, except the genre of music they were hosting.

  Folk music was totally in, and I was happy that we’d be seeing the band, Arms of Chance. I had their music downloaded to my computer for easy listening. What the heck would a band like that be doing playing in our small town? I decided to try my hardest to enjoy the night and not worry about anything else, especially things having to do with Lily or Nash.

  Finding Kyleigh was easy. She stood by the balloon stand and was wearing a bright green tank top.

  “Hey, I’m so glad you made it,” she told me as she hugged me. “How’s Lizzie?”

  I laughed, “Lily.”

  “Sorry, I’m terrible with names. Once I learn them I don’t forget them though. So Lily, how is she?”

  We walked toward the stage where a local band was currently playing.

  “I actually don’t know how she is. No one is answering the phone.” I bit my lip as tears tried to come pouring out. Just thinking about Lily missing out on this night was killing me.

  “I’m sure she’s still in the hospital under observation or either home resting. You know she might be in deep trouble too,” Kyleigh reminded me. “My parents would murder me for drinking that much.”

  We found a spot right up against the fencing that separated the seating and the standing. All of the seats were filled up. I wished we could be sitting down when Arms of Chance came on.

  “Do your parents let you out of the house to go to parties a lot?” I asked Kyleigh. She was waving frantically at someone and nodding her head at me at the same time.

  “They don’t care as long as I’m responsible about it. I’ll be eighteen in three months, so they loosened the reigns a little bit.” I tried to see who she was waving at when a huge burly security guard came up to us.

  “Hi,” Kyleigh said to him with her natural bubbliness. She pulled back her hair, tilted her head toward him, and asked him if we could get closer. He nodded and opened the gate letting us through. I was completely confused. I’d heard of flashing your boobs to get things, but flashing your ears? He sat us right up front and at once walked away without a word.