Uniting Hearts: Discovering Me #3

by A. M. Arthur

  He did, huge hazel eyes wary, and that broke my heart.

  “It’s been a stressful week and a long day, Cole. I’m not mad at you, I promise. It’s just tea.”

  “That I let run out.”

  “It happens. You aren’t my wife, and I don’t expect you to keep the house, cook all the meals, take care of the baby, and then give me a foot rub at the end of the day. You try to do so much, and I love you for it, but you don’t have to do it all. When the water boils, I’ll make the tea.”

  Cole searched my face for a moment, his expression slowly smoothing out, his body relaxing. “I didn’t mean to overreact. I know you aren’t Martin and that I’m safe with you. You promised me once you’d never hit me if I made a mistake, and I believe you. Honest.”

  “Good.” I pulled him close for a hug and he relaxed against my chest, arms loose around my waist. “And if we never have fights worse than this, then we’ll be very blessed.”

  “This wasn’t a fight, just a bump. I’m good now, I promise.”

  “I’m glad.” I pulled back and waited, happy when Cole leaned in and kissed me. “So what’s for dinner?”

  He pinched the top of my ass. “A baked chicken dish I found online. It’s got rice and this lemon-butter sauce all roasting together.”

  “Sounds great. I’ll set the counter.”

  I did exactly that, my own mood lightening as I fell into a familiar routine of getting plates and flatware and paper napkins. When the timer went off, Cole pulled a bubbling baking dish from the oven and deposited it on a trivet. It looked amazing and smelled like lemon and thyme. Annabeth watched us eat from her seat, eyes drooping slowly until she was asleep.

  “It’s funny how easily she falls asleep with you,” Cole said quietly. “She can fuss like crazy when it’s just her and me. It’s like she knows you’re her dad.”

  “You’re her dad, too, Cole, just in a less official way. Maybe my name is on the adoption papers, but she’s your daughter, too.”

  He smiled but didn’t respond. I knew a lot of his hesitation over accepting the dad role was rooted in his own self-doubts, and I hoped that over time he would see those doubts had no merit. He was already great with the baby, doting on her and seeing to her needs when I couldn’t. We’d only had her for a month, and I could already imagine how overprotective he’d get when Annabeth caught her first cold.

  After we ate and the dishes were cleaned up, I took a still-sleeping Annabeth upstairs to her crib, and when I came back down, Cole was stretched out on the couch in a sultry pose that went straight to my balls. We’d both been too exhausted this week to do more than swap the occasional hand job; I almost always woke up with morning wood but even that had been absent the last couple of days.

  The gentle whir of the small fan in the nursery was a steady sound on the baby monitor, and with that white noise in place, I eased my body down on top of Cole’s. He spread his legs, welcoming me close, and I pressed my groin into his. A hard dick met my slowly stiffening one. He thrust up against me in an intent way that got me fully hard while he plundered my mouth. For all that I was on top, Cole was definitely in control of this, and I was there for whatever he wanted.

  “Missed you,” I said between fierce kisses. I pushed a hand under his t-shirt to pinch his nipples. He sucked on my tongue. Squeezed my ass. Slid a finger into my jeans and down to my crease. Couldn’t get very far with my belt cinched in place, so we both worked our flies open. Shoved jeans down and out of the way. Yanked shirts off. Cole pulled a bottle of lube out from the behind the pillow his head rested on.

  “Tell me what you want,” I said. “Anything.”

  Cole’s eyes shined with desire. “Want you to ride me.”

  “Oh, hell yeah.” I climbed off Cole to shuck the jeans and socks completely, then yanked Cole’s off him. Cole slicked his dick with lube, getting it nice and wet for me, because it had been a while. He loved it when I teased him, so I stole the lube and prepped myself, angled so he could barely see me. See me press one, then two glistening fingers into my own asshole.

  As much as I wanted to draw this out, a baby cry could stop it all at any moment.

  Cole sat up and turned so his feet were on the floor. I knelt over his lap, so turned on by this impromptu seduction I didn’t dare touch my own dick. I needed to feel Cole inside me first. To do this beautiful thing with him that I loved so much. He held my gaze as I lowered myself, taking him into my body with short, gentle thrusts, until all of him was inside me. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and licked into his mouth, taking a moment to appreciate this amazing connection we shared.

  Until Cole bit my lip. “Make us both come,” he whispered.

  Fuck yes. It was messy and desperate, and we silenced our cries with an endless kiss as I drove us both to orgasm. Cole came first, filling me the way I loved being filled. Staking his claim in the most primal of ways. I stayed on his lap, impaled, knees aching a bit, while Cole jacked me to completion. My orgasm rolled over me in wave after wave of sensation, ass tightening around Cole’s dick over and over, making him moan into my mouth until I was spent.

  I climbed off, and we took a moment to stretch out side-by-side and simply exist in the moment. In the way Cole’s cheeks blazed with color and unchecked desire. The way his eyes reflected peace and joy. And trust. Every time I saw that blind trust in Cole, I stood in awe of having earned it from him. From a man who’d been so utterly broken when we first met, but who’d taken a chance on my friendship. And then on my love.

  My entire life was safe and content in this house, and my heart wanted to burst with all the love I felt in that moment. So. Much. Love.

  “What?” Cole asked after I’d stared at him for a while.

  “Just thinking how blessed I am, with you and Annabeth. Our family is so precious to me, Cole. So fucking precious.”

  “It’s precious to me, too.” He traced nonsensical shapes on my pecs with a single, pale finger. “While you were at work today, I did some research into Reynolds College.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. They have a pretty decent architecture and design program. I could start with one or two classes a semester, try to get them on the same day so I’d do less commuting. Work up to being on campus more, while still being available at home and in the shop. I mean, the new semester starts next week, so I’d have to apply right now for the spring term, but I also think maybe I should wait until next fall with Annabeth still so young. I’m not sure.”

  I blinked at him several times, floored by this new direction and yet not really. Cole wanted to go back to college, but he also wanted to be with me. When he had first brought up going back, he’d balked at the idea of living on-campus, with no one familiar around him. The idea of him going to Reynolds College hadn’t really occurred to me, because Cole had done all his own research into schools.

  “You know I’ll support whichever choice you make,” I said. “Are you sure you can handle starting college in five months, and also help me raise a newborn?”

  He let out a long breath that gusted across my bare skin. “I don’t know. Probably not. It’s just exciting to think about going back to school. I dropped out for Martin, and he promised so many times he’d let me go back and finish my degree, and then my life became about surviving one day to the next. I stopped having any sort of direction or dreams or personal goals.” Cole’s hand stopped over my heart. “Being here with you helps me dream again, so thank you for that.”

  “You don’t have to thank me for helping you reach for your dreams, babe, it’s what partners do. But if you need to hear the words, then you are so very, very welcome.” I rubbed our noses together. “I admit, I love the idea of you going back to school someplace semi-nearby and not out of state. If Reynolds is truly where you want to go.”

  “I think so, but you’re right. I’ll wait, not apply for the spring term, and really decide if going there is what I want. I’m pretty sure it is, but it helps knowing I have time. And a f
inancial cushion to fall back on while I figure myself out. At least now that I’m not relying on shop sales for my income, I can start sending you my share of the expenses with my phone, instead of always giving you an envelope of cash.”

  I hid a flinch and managed a reasonable chuckle. “You can join the electronic age with the rest of us and Venmo your share.”

  “Exactly. And I need to go car shopping one day. Get something reliable for driving two hours a day, several days a week.”

  “We are definitely doing that in the near future.”

  His own smile went adorably shy. “I might need you to cosign a loan with me, though. I could pay cash, but I’d rather try building my credit. I had one emergency credit card when I first went to college, but Martin made me deactivate it pretty early on.”

  To keep Cole dependent on him. I hated hearing these stories about Martin, but I also loved that Cole could talk about his past without getting the sorrowful, spooked look that used to come over him. “I’ll cosign anything you need. Maybe we can do it sometime next week when I’ve got shop coverage. Or we can go Tuesday when we’re closed.”

  “We’ll figure it out.” Cole seemed on the verge of another ‘thank you’ but it turned into a small yawn. “We should probably get cleaned up.” He slid one hand around my hip and into my sticky crease. “Thank you for tonight.” Something in his eyes said he was thanking me for more than just the sex we’d had.

  “You are so welcome. Thank you.”

  He grinned.

  I was on the outside, so I got up first, careful not to smear the cushions with come or lube. If I’d ever imagined having this much sex on it, I would have ordered a more durable, stain-resistant fabric. Not that we’d be having a hell of a lot more couch sex in the future, not with a baby who’d eventually grow into a toddler. All the stairs in the house would be a challenge for little legs, and I definitely needed to get baby-safe, slip-resistant mats for both sets.

  We took our clothes upstairs. Cole cleaned up using the sink, while I popped into the tub for a quick shower. When I was done and dressed, light streamed out of Annabeth’s room. I found Cole holding her, swaying in place while whispering, and the sight of them together arrested me. Annabeth had a faint scattering of what I hoped would stay honey-blond hair, similar to her mother’s, and it made her look like she was Cole’s. The only thing that could make it more perfect was if her blue eyes lightened to hazel.

  He glanced up. “She wasn’t quite crying but she was fussing and awake.”

  “No problem. You look so natural with her.”

  “Every time I hold her, it feels a little less daunting. But she’s still so small. So delicate.”

  “And perfectly safe in your care.” I walked inside so I could slide my arm around his waist and peer down at our daughter. She stared up at us with wide, innocent eyes, cheeks still pink from her earlier upset. “Hey, baby girl. You get tired of sleeping?”

  She gurgled and waved two tiny fists in the air. Our little champ.

  The rest of August passed by in a blur of work and baby. I squeaked out as much alone time with Cole as possible around everything else. I’d had persistent radio silence from Bethann after a single, brief “I’m okay, I promise” text exactly two weeks after she’d left on the bus. I missed her like crazy, but having a little piece of her in Annabeth helped. So did the chaos of managing a business, a newborn, and a still-developing relationship with Cole.

  He was my rock every single day. Sometimes I thought he went a little overboard in how he took care of me, likely falling into old habits of caring for his ex-asshole, and I didn’t like it. I also didn’t fight with him about it, because if this was how Cole coped with our current life, then I’d deal. I’d watch him closely, but I’d deal. I also urged him to go out into the workshop whenever possible, and sometimes he went.

  I rarely saw a new piece when I poked around, though.

  On the first of September, he Venmo-ed me his share of our expenses, and I reluctantly accepted the fact that I had to take his money. I also felt guilty about the envelopes of cash in my office desk, full of money I hadn’t truly wanted to take from him until his land sold. Now that it had, I didn’t have any excuse not to accept his share, other than I liked taking care of Cole. I liked providing for our family.

  Despite us both being sleep-deprived and borderline stressed out most of the time, life was pretty good. The shop had steady sales. My online sales were good. Cole bought his very first brand-new car, and I gladly cosigned his loan, not a single doubt in my mind about him paying on-time each month. And the car itself made him so fucking happy. Proud, even. He loved showing it off.

  The sale of his parents’ land all those weeks ago, and his choice to be my partner and raise our daughter, had freed a part of Cole that a lifetime of abuse had locked away. But sometimes I caught Cole gazing wistfully at places on his phone, or watching shows on The Travel Channel. Places he still wanted to visit.

  Maybe when Annabeth was older and could enjoy it more, we'd plan some vacations for our little family.

  September always saw a slight drop in in-store sales as tourists stopped traveling and kids went back to school, so I spent a lot of time doing online sales, research, and connecting with regular collectors. Some days, when Annabeth was napping, Cole brought the baby monitor down to the store simply so we could spend a few hours in each other’s company. Cole no longer actively hid from the folks of Franklin. He made an effort to talk to people, showing me he was here for the long haul.

  The third Sunday in September, I was minding the shop alone when my cell rang with a very unexpected name. There was only one customer browsing, so I took the call. “Mr. Jons?”

  A deep voice chuckled. “You can just call me Clancy. No need to be so formal when we’re about the same age.”

  “Sorry, it’s a habit. Some of my clients prefer formal titles.” I rubbed at a smudge on the glass display case in front of me, curious and hopeful. “What can I do for you today, Clancy?”

  “Keeping my promise to call if I got any interesting leads. You see, my best friend’s father passed away recently, and he’s inherited a house full of stuff. It’s been in the family for generations, so you can imagine what’s been accumulated. Mostly books, because his father was a bit of a book hoarder, but there are also some fine antiques in some of the rooms.”

  Excitement bubbled up inside me. As much as I loved rummaging around in barns and sheds for rusty gold, a house usually offered finds in much better shape and were quicker to sell. And I rarely had to spend any time or money on restoration. “Please pass along my condolences to your friend.”

  “I would but they despised each other, and Declan’s been…agitated by the whole thing.”

  “I see. I’m sorry to hear that.” Sounded like a complicated relationship. “I don’t deal in many antique books. My business trades heavily in transportation and railroad memorabilia, but I do have some names I can pass along to you.”

  “I appreciate that, but we’ve got the books angle covered. I wanted to offer you first pick of the house and its other antiques. Neither of us knows much about the value of the items, but you seem like a fair businessman, so I expect you’ll offer fair prices.”

  “Absolutely. We both want to make some money here, and it’s hard to keep an independent business running if you get a reputation for being dishonest.”

  Clancy chuckled. “I understand that completely.”

  “When were you thinking of letting me look around?”

  “I make my own schedule at Shindig, and Declan mostly works nights, so what works best for you, Jeremy?”

  “Is Tuesday too soon? My shop is closed so I won’t have to rearrange anyone’s schedule.”

  “Actually, Tuesday works just fine for me. Shindig is closed too, and I know Declan is itching to clean the house up fast and get it on the market. Move on with his life.”

  I looked at the ceiling and pictured Cole’s smiling face. “I can completely em
pathize with that. My boyfriend went through something similar this past year, and I’m more than willing to help out Declan.” And get some nice, new inventory for my store. “Do you want to start at, say, nine o’clock?”

  “That’ll work just fine. My boyfriend Samir will probably be at the house too, because you’re a stranger to Declan, and he gets anxious. Having me and Samir around will help.”

  “That’s not a problem. Many hands make light work.”

  He laughed. “In that case, feel free to bring your own boyfriend along. Cole, was it?”

  I hesitated, because he’d called the late father a book hoarder, and Cole was sensitive to messes. But Cole’s issues weren’t Clancy’s business. “I’m not sure he’ll be able to come along. Without knowing how much there is for me to look at and pick through, I can’t plan for a return time or a babysitter.”

  “Babysitter? I didn’t realize you had children.”

  My face ached from the force of my grin. “A little girl. I adopted her back in July, and she’s been an amazing blessing. Ten weeks old today.”

  “My congratulations. I can hear how much you love her in your voice. I’d tell you to bring her along, but the house fell into a state of disrepair these last few years, and it probably isn’t the cleanest or most comfortable environment for an infant.”

  Something in his voice made me believe him about the house being in bad shape. Book hoarding didn’t sound as awful as what Cole’s parents had done by keeping everything from rotting food to bottles of urine because the plumbing stopped working. But I didn’t want to bring Cole into another hoarded home and have it trigger an anxiety attack. “Then it will likely just be me on Tuesday. I appreciate this again, I mean it.”

  “Not a problem. I’ll text you the address.”

  “Thank you. See you Tuesday, Clancy.” After hanging up, I did a little shimmy in place, not at all embarrassed that my lone customer saw it. She made a small purchase before leaving, and I took the opportunity to call Cole.