Don't Even Think About It

by Sarah Mlynowski

  Lunchtime was awkward too. Cooper and Mackenzie left school for lunch. Olivia sat with Lazar. Tess avoided BJ. And Sadie. And Teddy, obviously, although he wasn’t one of us. She started to skip lunch entirely and spend the time studying in the library. She only lost two pounds, but she aced all her work that week. She didn’t even need to sit next to the smartest person in the class.

  And Pi? Well, Pi was watching us. Pi was definitely watching everyone. Pi was always watching. She was watching the redheaded fake nurse who was wandering our hallways.

  Olivia had been the first to see her. She’d gone to the nurse’s room on Wednesday with a headache. She’d ignored it until eleven but then realized she needed some Advil or she’d have to go home. So she’d made her way down to Nurse Carmichael’s office and knocked on her door.

  Instead of Nurse Carmichael, a redheaded woman had answered.

  “Hi there!” the woman said in a voice that was way too cheerful. “What can I help you with?” Does she have it?

  Olivia wondered what this woman thought she had. Was something contagious going around school? The flu? Meningitis? “Where’s Ms. Carmichael?”

  “She’s on vacation,” the woman said. Permanent vacation. Screwup. “I’m Suzanna.”

  What screwup? What Olivia wanted to know was what Carmichael had screwed up, but of course she couldn’t ask.

  “Come on in,” Suzanna coaxed.

  Olivia did not want to get exposed to meningitis. “Oh, never mind. I thought I had a headache, but I feel fine now. It’s gone.”

  She’s panicking. Maybe she has it. The woman took hold of her arm. “Are you sure? Why don’t you come in for a few minutes? And chat?”

  Olivia was officially freaked out. “I should get to class.”

  “Wait. What’s your name? What grade are you in? You have very unusual eyes,” the woman said. That’s the color!

  Oh. She knew about the ESP. How did she know about the ESP? Olivia took a step back.

  Olivia’s mom had noticed her eyes the night before. “Are your eyes itchy? They look strange. Do you have pinkeye?” she’d asked.

  “No,” Olivia had answered, avoiding her gaze. “I’m just wearing purple eyeliner.”

  In theory, purple eyes were cool. But in reality, it was supremely creepy when one day our eyes were brown and the next they had a lilac tint. It was like we were turning into vampires or something.

  “We’re becoming undead!” Edward had cheered.

  Olivia ran away from Suzanna without answering any questions. She recounted the story at our next Espies meeting.

  “Who do you think she was?” Tess asked.

  Do you think she knows about us?

  Is she the person Pi heard by the tent?

  Definitely seems like it.

  She’s spying on us.

  Why would a substitute nurse spy on us?

  Maybe she’s not a substitute nurse!

  I bet she’s from the CDC!

  She wants to round us up and have us quarantined!

  She wants to take away our telepathy!

  What should we do?

  We should confront her.

  “No,” Pi said. “Even if the nurse suspects something, she doesn’t know anything for sure. If she did, she would have said something to us. If we approach her, we’re just going to look suspicious.”

  Jordana pointed a lime-green nail to her eyes. “We already look pretty suspicious.”

  “She’s probably gathering evidence against us,” Levi said.

  “Maybe she is,” Pi admitted. “So let’s not give her any. Avoid her. And we all have to be on our best behavior. In school and outside of it.”

  We nodded.

  Pi stood up. “That means in school no one visits the infirmary. If you see her coming, walk the other way. Keep your distance. Don’t blow it out of school either. Stay in control. No drinking.”

  No one spike the punch at Mackenzie’s Sweet.

  No pot either.

  Or Addies.

  Why would you take an Addie at a Sweet?

  You guys are no fun.

  “Just stay under the radar,” Pi repeated. “Got it?”

  We nodded. Once again we had a plan.

  If only all of us had stuck to it.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

  TWO DAYS UNTIL THE SWEET

  “Olivia, it’s your turn,” Mr. Roth said.

  Here it was. The moment of truth.

  Speech time.

  Again.

  Lyme disease, Lyme disease, Lyme disease.

  She could do this. She was not the same person she had been two weeks earlier. She was different. She had a boyfriend. She could hear people’s thoughts. She had confidence.

  Or, at least, more than she’d had before.

  She stood up. Slowly.

  Is she going to pass out again?

  She looks nervous.

  Olivia tried to smile. Lyme disease, Lyme disease, Lyme disease. Did she have Lyme disease? No, she did not.

  She turned around to face the crowd.

  She definitely looks nervous.

  Lazar gave her a thumbs-up.

  She’s going to do it, Renée thought. Go Olivia!

  Yes! She could do this! She knew how her speech started: In Ridgefield, Connecticut! She looked at Lazar and smiled.

  He smiled back. She’s not going to fall again, is she? That would be so embarrassing.

  Olivia narrowed her eyes. Embarrassing for her? Or embarrassing for him?

  The room started to sway.

  “Olivia?” Mr. Roth asked. “Are you okay?”

  She didn’t feel okay. She felt sick. Her headache was back and it was a bad one. Oh God. She was going to pass out again. She was going to pass out and hit her head and this time she really was going to die.

  “You know what?” she said. “I think I need to sit down.” Without looking at her teacher, she returned to her seat and slumped into her chair. Mission unaccomplished. Olivia felt like crying.

  Lazar gave her a puppy-dog face. At least she didn’t pass out.

  Wow, Pi thought, Olivia, your boyfriend is a real asshole.

  That’s it, Renée thought. She needs my help. I’m practicing with her after school.

  “Olivia, we’ll need to discuss this after class,” Mr. Roth said sternly.

  When the bell rang, Olivia slumped her way over to Mr. Roth. “You’re getting one more chance. That’s the best I can do. Or you fail the assignment. Next week. Got it?”

  She got it, all right.

  * * *

  Teddy cornered Tess after class. “You’re coming with me to the ball fields to watch the baseball game. No excuses. Let’s move.”

  “Fine,” she said. It was a nice day. It wasn’t a terrible idea to get some fresh air. Sit outside. Cheer on Nick. Support BHS against Millennium.

  Most of us were going to the game. It was the semifinals. We wanted to support Nick. We might not have all been friends before this, but there was nothing like having ESP to bond you to a person.

  Tess looks really good, Teddy thought.

  Was he noticing her because of the two pounds she lost? Probably not. His attention was more likely because of her new V-neck that showed off her cleavage. BJ had been thinking about her breasts all through homeroom. And so had other boys, actually, as the day went on. Not one of them had said a word. Without ESP, Tess would never have thought a single one of these guys found her sexy. Maybe they always had, and she never knew?

  They climbed the bleachers behind the catcher. Nick was walking toward the mound. Teddy and Tess cheered loudly.

  From where they sat, Tess could see the catcher making those weird hand motions to the pitcher. She could also hear the catcher’s thoughts: Try a fastball.

  Then Nick’s thoughts as he held the bat: Fastball. Got it.

  The pitcher threw the ball; Nick swung and sent it over the fence.

  “Home run!” the umpire yelled.

  “Go, Nick!” Tess
hollered along with everyone else.

  “He’s been playing so well this week,” Teddy said. “I knew he could do it.”

  Yeah, he’d been playing well. With a little help.

  Tess smiled. Nick was doing great. She was here with Teddy and he thought she looked good. In fact, lots of boys did. Life was good. Tess felt the sun on her face. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the moment.

  Then she opened them and heard Teddy think, There she is! Her heart plummeted. Of course that was why Teddy had wanted to come. Keith was on the team, so Sadie would be there. Why hadn’t it occurred to her?

  A text dinged on her phone. BJ.

  You look like you’re about to kill him.

  Tess looked up and spotted BJ sitting high in the bleachers. He waved. She typed:

  He’s thinking about her again.

  BJ looked down at his phone and wrote back:

  He only likes her because she’s unavailable. You have to show him that you’re unavailable.

  Tess: And how do I do that?

  BJ: Come kiss me.

  Ha. She shook her head. Did he really think she was going to cross the field and kiss him in front of everyone?

  Tess: Yeah right.

  BJ: I’m coming over.

  By the time she looked up, he was already walking toward them.

  Oh God.

  “Hi there,” he said, and squeezed onto the bench beside her. “What’s up, peeps?”

  You are not going to kiss me, Tess thought.

  You so want me to, he thought back. With a totally straight face, he put his hand on her knee.

  She wanted to punch him. Kind of.

  I’m growing on you, aren’t I? He winked, then turned to Teddy. “Hey, Teddy, my man, what’s happening?”

  Teddy looked back and forth between Tess and BJ’s hand on her knee. What the hell is that? “Not much,” he answered. “Just watching the game.”

  He’s freaking out, Tess told BJ.

  Of course he is. Can I touch your breast now? That would really freak him out.

  You are not to touch my breast.

  Not even the left one?

  No breast-touching at all. She laughed. She couldn’t help it.

  “Uh, what’s new with you, BJ?” Teddy asked.

  “Nothing much. Trying to convince your friend here to go out with me sometime, but she keeps turning me down.”

  BJ!

  What? I’m helping you!

  “She does?” She never told me that.

  “She thinks she’s too good for me, but she’ll come around. It’s only a matter of time.”

  Teddy clenched his jaw. She’s thinking about it? She cannot go out with that sleazeball.

  What’s he thinking? BJ wondered. You’re right between us. You’re blocking his thoughts.

  Tess smiled. He’s thinking you’re a sleazeball.

  He turned to look at her. Do you think I’m a sleazeball?

  Tess gave the question some thought. I used to. But I guess … well, everyone else is thinking the same things as you. At least you’re saying them.

  BJ raised an eyebrow. Then his hand began to creep slowly up her leg.

  I spoke too soon.

  He gave a slight nod. Let’s play chicken.

  She put her hand on his. Then she leaned over and very slowly gave him a long kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for coming to visit.”

  BJ laughed. Am I being dismissed?

  I don’t like this one bit, Teddy thought.

  Holy crap. He’s jealous! It’s working!

  BJ stood up and saluted them. Good luck. The offer is still good if you want me to keep going.

  She shook her head. Goodbye!

  “You’re going to Mackenzie’s Sweet, right?” BJ asked.

  “Yeah,” Tess answered. Things with her and Mackenzie were definitely strange, but she wouldn’t miss the Sweet. That would be unforgivable. Plus there would be dancing.

  BJ jumped down the stairs. “Save me a slow dance!”

  “I’ll think about it!” she hollered back.

  The girls in the row in front of her were buzzing. Does BJ like Tess?

  Tess could feel Teddy’s eyes on her. “We can go to the party together if you want,” he said.

  Huh? She turned to him.

  I can’t believe BJ was sleazing up my Tess.

  Seriously? Since when was she his Tess?

  He squirmed in his seat. “You’re not really going to go out with him, are you?”

  She tried to sound flippant. “I might. He’s funny.” And honest.

  “Funny-looking,” Teddy said. She’s so not his type. Although, she is looking sexy.

  She was looking sexy? She preened in her seat.

  “He’s not funny-looking,” she finally answered. BJ was a lot of things, but funny-looking wasn’t one of them. He was hot. He had great shoulders. Really big hands. She felt herself flush. She was suddenly very, very, very glad that he wasn’t sitting next to her right then.

  * * *

  Mackenzie and Cooper skipped the baseball game. They went to dinner instead. Like they had every night that week.

  Cooper had been spending as little time as he could at his apartment. “I miss you!” Ashley cried, wrapping her arms around his leg. Why does Cooper not take me with him all the time?

  He felt bad for Ashley. He missed her too, but he just couldn’t take being at home. He couldn’t face anything. Except Mackenzie. If he could just focus on Mackenzie, everything would be okay.

  He was dreading Saturday.

  “Gee, thanks a lot,” Mackenzie said as they waited for a table at Kitchenette. “Aren’t you excited to see me all dressed up?”

  “You are going to look amazing,” he said. “It’s just everyone’s going to be there, lying. My parents, too.”

  “Sorry about that. My parents insisted on inviting some of their friends whose kids were coming. I didn’t know, so …” She kissed Cooper hard on the lips. “I’m sorry they’re coming. But I think it’ll be okay,” she told him. “As long as we’re together. A team. It’s us against them.”

  They thought they could hide. They thought they could separate themselves from us.

  Impossible.

  There was no escaping us.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

  PARTY PREP

  The big day was finally here.

  Sweet day.

  We spent the day getting ready.

  Some of us got manicures. In Manhattan, there’s a nail place on every corner, but most of us went to Beauty Charm on Chambers. It had the best massage chairs. Courtney and Jordana went to Drybar. Courtney got the straight-up blowout while Jordana got the just-got-out-of-bed look. Mackenzie, Mackenzie’s mom, and Mackenzie’s sister, Cailin, spent the day at Bliss Soho getting everything done: hair, nails, pedicure, and makeup.

  Mackenzie had been excited to spend the day with her sister.

  But the excitement ended about five minutes into the appointment.

  “So, how’s school?” Mackenzie asked.

  “Fine,” Cailin said. I can’t believe Mom made me come in for this stupid party when I should be in the library.

  The appointment didn’t improve.

  “You have the most incredible eyes,” the makeup artist told her. “I’m going to use a teal green to really bring out the violet. They’re so unusual.”

  Come tonight and you won’t think they’re so unusual, Mackenzie almost said.

  “Did you get colored contacts?” her mom asked, peering at her face.

  “No, they’re just changing color. Puberty, I guess.”

  Under the circumstances, we thought that was a decent excuse. Tess’s hair had been straight until her fourteenth birthday, when it had gone wavy, right? These things happened.

  Cailin sighed. I got zits and Mackenzie got exotic eyes. How is that fair? Ugh.

  Mackenzie wanted to tell her to shut the hell up but she closed her eyes instead.

  * * *

  “Do we r
eally have to go to this Sweet Sixteen party?” Lazar asked as they walked up West Broadway. “I could get us tickets to The Eiffel Tower at the Atlantic Theater.”

  If Olivia were being honest, she’d admit that she didn’t really feel like going to the Sweet either. She was depressed. Her epic fail in public speaking class had been a punch to her stomach. “I promised Mackenzie I’d be there,” Olivia said. She’d bought a gift. A set of cute mini metallic nail polishes. She’d “overheard” Mackenzie admiring Jordana’s nail color one day in homeroom and had asked Jordana where it was from. Olivia had also borrowed a green dress of her mom’s and a pair of sparkly flats. She even did her makeup just the way Lazar said he liked it on the day he’d finally asked her out. Well, not said. Thought. “It should be fun,” she added. More fun than The Eiffel Tower, anyway.

  “I don’t dance,” Lazar said.

  “Oh, don’t worry,” Olivia said. “I’m not a great dancer either.”

  Such a waste of time. Why does Olivia care about Mackenzie? She’s kind of a bitch. Olivia cares too much about what stupid people think.

  Olivia stopped in her tracks. Maybe she should turn around and go home. She didn’t want to drag him against his will. “Do you want to just go home?”

  He turned to her, surprised. “I thought you wanted to go.”

  “I do want to go. But not if you’re going to complain the whole time.”

  He blinked. “We can go,” he said finally. “I’m just not really a party type of person.” I never know what to do with myself. I never know what to do with my feet. I should have taken dance lessons when I was younger or something.

  Aw, Olivia thought. Her heart melted. He’s shy. Just like me.

  Olivia laced her fingers through his. “We don’t have to stay long.”

  They walked the last few blocks, hand in hand.

  * * *

  Mackenzie was in the bathroom at Soho Tower reapplying her lipstick. It was seven-fifty-eight, which meant the party was starting in two minutes.

  She wasn’t sure how it was biologically possible, but her heart was pounding inside her head, her neck, her fingers. She was nervous. Very nervous. Not about one thing specifically. She was nervous about it all. Would someone think something they shouldn’t? Would Cooper change his mind and decide he hated her after all?