One Look

by Harlow James

  “Nice catch, Conner!” Jake and Rocky both shout as Conner grins from ear to ear as he rises from the ground.

  “Nice, buddy,” I add as they walk up the steps of the porch and into the house, me trailing behind them.

  “It was nothing,” he replies nonchalantly, making me smile at the humor in his voice. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen my brother this cheerful.

  I pour Lochlin and I another glass of wine before realizing I need to use the restroom before dinner.

  I turn down the hallway to use the bathroom since the boys are washing up in the kitchen and run smack into Jake’s chest.

  “Oh!” I exclaim as I stumble backward. “I’m sorry, Jake,” I offer as he steadies me with his hands on my shoulders.

  “No biggie, Dani. You look really nice tonight, by the way,” he says while eyeing me up and down. “And I like your sweater,” he winks before walking around me and out into the dining room.

  I look down at my jeans and t-shirt, and then notice the cream-colored sweater I’m wearing today… the same one Jake bought for me on our first date.

  Shit. Now he must think I’m some clingy and desperate ex-girlfriend, still wearing the sweater he bought me almost three years ago. But truth is, I’ve worn it consistently throughout our time apart because it makes me feel closer to him, and I just really love this sweater.

  If I knew he would be here tonight, I never would have worn it in front of him.

  “Dear lord,” I sigh as I finish my trek to the bathroom to pee and wash my hands. This evening is just getting started, and I’ve already made a fool of myself twice. How much worse can it get?

  Chapter 37

  Jake

  I knew Danielle would be at dinner tonight, but based on her reaction, I’m guessing she didn’t know about me joining them at all.

  When Rocky gave me the invite, I accepted willingly, knowing that any time I could spend with Danielle would help me become acclimated in her new life. I confided in Rocky that I have every intention of getting her back, and he eagerly encouraged me to do that. I also know though, that I need to err on the side of caution because the Danielle I was with three years ago isn’t the same woman I’m conversing with today.

  “Your house is really nice, Lochlin. How long have you been here?” I ask while pouring dressing on my salad. Lochlin is still in the kitchen preparing to bring the food to the table, Rocky close behind assisting her. I catch him grab her ass, which makes me laugh. I’m glad my boy is gratified, and Lochlin seems like the perfect girl to keep him in line.

  “Thank you. I actually found this place shortly after Dani and I graduated. I was really lucky. Houses like this, for as cheap as I got it, are rare to find in southern California.”

  “So are the two of you living here together now?” I ask, trying to make conversation, but also curious about how the two of them got together in the first place.

  Rocky and Lochlin lock eyes with each other and smile.

  “Well, we’ve actually been talking about that,” Rocky answers as he follows her into the dining room, placing the bowl of spaghetti and meatballs in the center of the table, and a basket of garlic bread.

  “That’s awesome you guys. But I have to ask, how did the two of you even happen?”

  Rocky starts laughing while Lochlin shakes her head.

  “Oh yes, please tell the story, since I was kept in the dark for a while regarding this too,” Danielle chimes in from her seat next to me with a knowing smirk. “But do remember that we have young ears at the table,” she gestures over to where Conner is sitting, his eyes moving frantically around each of us at the table.

  “Um, I’m almost fifteen, Dani. I’m not a kid, and I know what sex is,” Conner replies, causing Dani to choke on her wine she just took a drink of.

  I reach over instinctually and pat her on the back as she coughs through the wine she swallowed a little too hard.

  “Are you okay?” I ask her, rubbing her back as she gets her cough under control. She looks over at me, wide-eyed in shock, partly from what her brother just said, but also a bit from the fact that I’m touching her. The soft fabric of her sweater glides under my hand as I wish it was her bare skin I was touching right now.

  “Um, yeah. I’m okay. Thank you,” she mumbles through her embarrassment, then looks around the table where Rocky, Lochlin, and Conner are all staring at us.

  I’ve been trying to distract myself from having her so close to me, the smell of her perfume hitting my nose when she sat down. But as soon as she was choking, I had to touch her, not only to make sure she was okay but also because I can’t stand being this close to her and not feeling her connected to me.

  “Well, maybe that’s a story for another time,” Lochlin says cautiously, eyeing Conner from the side where he chuckles under his breath.

  “So how is it being back, Jake?” Lochlin asks, changing the subject as we all pass around the spaghetti and meatballs, salad, and bread she’s prepared. Rocky says Lochlin has really been eager to learn her way around the kitchen, watching cooking shows relentlessly so she can happily take care of him. He thinks part of it is because of his mother and the fact that she’s an amazing cook. Lochlin probably doesn’t want to look like a disappointment in front of her.

  I stab my meatball, breaking off a piece before answering. “It feels great. I missed southern California, the weather particularly. I missed the team and playing for the Rays. And there are other things I missed too,” I trail off, looking sideways towards Danielle, whose face is buried in her plate, avoiding eye contact with me.

  She’s chewing on a bite of food as she perks her head up at my declaration, turning towards me so fast, she starts to choke… again.

  “Danielle, are you okay?” Lochlin looks over, realizing Dani is coughing again. I reach out to pat her back once more as she gets her situation under control.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. I guess I shouldn’t be allowed to eat or drink tonight,” she jokes before taking a small sip of her water. She peers over again at me, questioning me with her gaze, silently asking me what it is that I’m up to.

  The truth is, I don’t have some grand plan in place. I just know I want to be around her as much as possible and get to know her again. That same girl I fell in love with three years ago is still in there, I know it. I just need to help bring her out of her shell. And I want to know who she is now too. She’s a woman who’s taken on a brand new role in her life, caring for her brother and putting him above all else, which I immensely respect. I just wish our relationship wasn’t a casualty of that decision all that time ago.

  “Living in California does have its benefits,” Rocky chimes in, relieving some tension at the table right now.

  “So how are you liking your job, Dani?” I ask, wanting to keep her in the conversation. I’ve run into her twice since last week, but it was just in passing. She kept her head down mostly, pretending she didn’t see me.

  “I really love it. In fact, I’m excited for the reading event you guys are doing next Saturday at the library. The kids are going to love it!”

  “Yeah, I heard about that,” Rocky replies. “Was that your idea? We’ve never done something like that before.”

  She smiles wide with a sparkle in her eye, highlighting her passion for her job. “Yeah, it was. Andrew said that really wanted to increase community involvement and connections to encourage more people to come to games. I thought, what better way to form connections than with kids? It helps get your names out there, the kids will love it, and it promotes reading, which is so crucial at a young age.”

  I drop my fork on my plate and reach for my napkin, wiping my face and then taking in Danielle next to me. I’m so in awe of her right now that if the other three people around us weren’t in the room, I’d be pulling her into me and attacking her mouth with mine.

  “What?” She questions me, pulling away.

  I reach out and grab her hand, hearing Lochlin gasp across from us, but blatantly ignore
her, and lock eyes with Danielle.

  “You amaze me, you know that?”

  Her mouth drops open as I hear her breathing speed up, her eyes bouncing back and forth between mine. Finally, she clears her throat just as Rocky does the same and Conner chuckles again.

  “Thank you. But it’s nothing, really.” She turns away from me, dropping my hand and resuming her dinner.

  Fuck, I think I just came on too strong. But I can’t help it. Her passion and beauty are just too much for me to handle. Being near her is bringing up these emotions I haven’t let myself feel in years, because the first and only person I’ve ever felt them for was her.

  The rest of the meal is filled with small talk, including the fact that Conner is thinking about trying out for the baseball team. Rocky and I eagerly encourage him to do it, which I know Dani appreciates as we all get ready to say our goodbyes.

  “Thanks again for dinner, you two,” I say to Rocky and Lochlin as he holds her by the waist next to the front door where we’re all gathered getting ready to leave.

  “Anytime. All three of you are always welcome here,” Lochlin replies as she breaks free from Rocky and gives me a hug, doing the same to Dani and Conner next.

  “We love you guys. See you soon,” Dani tells them as she leads Conner out of the door and down to their car.

  “Don’t give up on her, Jake,” Lochlin whispers to me once Dani is out of earshot.

  “I don’t plan on it, Loch. But fuck. I think I came on too strong in there,” I mutter as I run my hand down my jaw through my scruff.

  She shakes her head. “No, she needs you to remind her of what you had. Don’t be too forward, but don’t give her too much space either. I know my best friend, and she’s stubborn. She needs to see that the two of you are meant to be again. I know it, and I think you do too.”

  I nod as Rocky kisses Lochlin on the temple.

  “Thanks. I appreciate your help with this,” I chuckle, making the two of them do the same. “Not that I don’t think I could do it on my own,” I shrug.

  “Oh, I have faith in you, Jake. But Dani has a lot of guilt where it concerns you, so you need to help her see that you’ve forgiven her.”

  If you had asked me if that were true two years ago, I would have told you you’d be crazy to think I forgave her for pushing me away. But time, distance, and perspective have helped me see that her decision to end us had more to do with her than with me. It was what she felt like she needed at the time, and I had to accept it. Unfortunately, it took me a while to do that.

  But now seeing her again and knowing time can help heal wounds, I have no choice but to remain optimistic that we can find our way back to one another.

  “I plan on it,” I say, turning my head to see that Dani is getting ready to get in her car. “I’ll catch you guys later,” I throw out before turning and jogging quickly down the driveway to make sure I get to talk to her before she leaves.

  “Dani,” I huff out once I catch up to her, capturing her focus just before she opens her door.

  “What’s up, Jake?” She asks curiously while adjusting her purse on her arm.

  “It was really nice to see you tonight. I’m sorry it was a surprise I was here, but I’m not sorry that I got to spend time with you.”

  She eyes me suspiciously while placing her hand on her hip. “So you knew I was gonna be here tonight?”

  I shrug while giving her a sly grin. “Maybe…”

  She shakes her head at me, giving me a small smile in return. “You’re relentless.”

  “You have no idea, Dani.”

  “Oh, I think I remember a little,” she smiles up at me before her smile drops and she turns to grab her handle.

  “Wait,” I say too loudly.

  She turns back around, arching her eyebrow. “Yes?”

  I have no control over my body right now as I instinctually close the distance between us and bend down to press my lips to her cheek, ever so softly, leaving a trail of tingles on her skin. The warmth of our touch spikes my blood pressure and wakes up my dick, who’s been patiently half-hard all night, even though there’s no hope of him getting near this woman this evening.

  I pull back and search Danielle’s face for her reaction, finding her eyes still closed but her mouth hanging open in shock. Her lids fly open and search my face for answers.

  “Why did you do that, Jake?” She asks breathlessly, her hand coming up to touch her cheek where my lips just were.

  “I can’t help it when I’m around you, Dani,” I answer honestly.

  She shakes her head. “You shouldn’t have done that,” she whispers. “I can’t do this, Jake,” she adds, pulling her door open and hopping inside.

  “Dani…”

  “No, Jake. Just… have a good night,” she says, then shuts her door and fires up her car, backing up and driving off, leaving me alone in the dark.

  Well, fuck. That could have gone better.

  I hop in my truck and drive back to my condo, replaying the entire evening in my head. I know that touching her seemed a bit forward, but I can’t help it. It’s a natural reflex and even though she told me not to, I can sense her resolve crumbling bit by bit each time we connect.

  I know I need to be patient. I know that we will get there, eventually.

  But each day being around Danielle and not having her be mine is pure and utter torture. I guess I should think of winning her back as more of a marathon than a sprint then, which is a challenge I am more than willing to accept. Game on.

  Chapter 38

  Dani

  “Okay, boys. Once we go out there, you’ll all be introduced to the crowd one-by-one, and then you’ll take your individual stations where the kids are seated and waiting for you to read to them,” I announce, standing in front of the entire OC Rays team in the back of the Heritage Park Regional Library. “Then we’ll have three rotations, so multiple groups of kids can interact with more than one player. They signed up in advance, and we tried to make all the groups as even as possible so no one’s feelings get hurt,” I wink, which makes the men sneer and shove each other playfully.

  It was hard to get Coach to agree to this event, seeing as how the team has a game this evening as part of their training, but when Andrew convinced him it was a good idea and great exposure for the organization, he bent the rules as long as we were done by noon.

  “Any questions?” I ask, veering around the room as the players get antsy at the prospect of having to read to little kids. Some of these men are married with kids of their own, calm and collected with the job for the next few hours. But the single men who barely interact with children, besides to sign autographs, look more nervous than normal.

  “What do I do if a kid asks me a question I don’t know the answer to?” Brandon Cash chimes in, sweating already from his newly acquired role this morning. I had a feeling he would be the one to get stage fright.

  I chuckle. “Just answer it the best you can, or deflect and tell them to ask their parents later,” I wink, which makes a few of the men, including Jake, laugh.

  Brandon nods and wipes his sweaty palms along his pants.

  “Okay then, boys. The mayor is about to introduce you to the crowd, which is overwhelmingly large, just an FYI. But that’s good! Just hang tight!” I smile and then turn to walk towards my table where I have pictures, pens, and team memorabilia ready to go for autograph time.

  It’s been a week since the dinner fiasco at Lochlin’s house, where I embarrassed myself by choking numerous times and running away from Jake when he kissed my cheek. I’ve been reliving it daily, cringing every time I think of how I reacted. But having him around me again when I feel so conflicted about it has me acting out of character more than normal.

  However, spring training has officially started, which means it’s been easy to avoid him, except for today where he was standing directly in front of me, dressed to the nines in his uniform, filling it out even better than he did three years ago. His eyes were penetratin
g me under his hat and his arms were crossed over his broad chest as I explained the agenda of the morning to the team, making my skin feel like it was on fire with how intense his gaze was.

  I’m trying to focus and act professionally, but I swear that Jake knows exactly what he’s doing as he eyed me like a steak he’s about to sink his teeth into. I’ve watched his eyes gaze up and down my body at least three times, taking in my fuchsia dress and heels I just might have worn with the intention to catch his eye. I may feel unsettled about how I want to move forward with him, but I also know that if he’s going to make me wet and desperate for him every time I see him, the least I can do is return the favor.

  “You’re a natural,” the deep voice says behind me, sending my heart galloping wildly as soon as I realize who it is.

  I turn around to meet the eyes of my ex, whose gaze I could never forget, no matter how hard I’ve tried. Ever since the first time we locked eyes, I knew I’d never overlook what his deep blue eyes can do to me.

  “Thanks,” I say casually, shuffling papers around, rearranging stacks that I’ve already organized three times.

  “This event is great, Dani. The kids are going bonkers out there, and Tim Donaldson, the team owner, is beyond himself at how great this idea was. He said tickets sales for the impending season have already gone up.”

  That bit of information makes me feel an overwhelming sense of pride in my chest, even though I know money isn’t everything. I just know that these kids will never forget this day. I remember being young and so enamored every time I met a player. It’s a dream come true for them.

  “Thanks, Jake,” I smile up at him, then turn back around as I hear the mayor announce the team. “Break a leg out there,” I say inherently, instantly regretting that phrase as soon as it comes out of my mouth.

  Jake laughs at me before stepping closer to me, barely brushing his chest against my back. He leans his head down to my ear, whispering his next words.