Stay

by Wynne, Hilary

  “Do I remind you of your sister, Julian?” I can’t decide if it’s creepy or not.

  “Yes, in certain ways. Isabelle was feisty like you. She had a very quick wit and was great with the snarky comebacks. She was beautiful, smart, loyal, and complicated. I think if she had lived, she would be the kind of woman you are.”

  Tears actually fill my eyes. That was so not creepy. It actually might have been the nicest compliment anyone has ever given me. I’m at a loss for the right words, so I just lean in, hug him, and whisper, “Thank you,” in his ear. I look down at my watch and realize we’ve been sitting here talking for over an hour. I’m technically still working, so I reluctantly pull away and tell Julian I need to get back to work. We stand up, and he takes me his arms and holds me tightly. I look up at him, and he’s staring down at me. We both smile. All is right in Julian and Alexa world at the moment.

  “I think we’re onto something here, Julian.”

  “Hmm … what are we onto, Alexa?”

  “In case you didn’t notice, we just had a great get-to-know-you session where nobody freaked out, and by nobody, I mean me. And we were able to really talk because nobody’s clothes were removed.”

  He laughs at my description of our mini date. “You’re right. Nobody freaked out, and that’s definitely a good thing, but I’m not going on record agreeing with the ‘no clothes being removed’ as a good thing. I’m a big fan of removing your clothes.” Julian the flirt is back.

  “You misunderstood me, Julian. I’m also a big fan of you removing my clothes. I just think it’s good for us to spend time getting to know each other outside of the bedroom. On some levels I feel like I know you so well, and on others I feel like a stranger.”

  I know it sounded like I was joking when I said we were onto something, but I really wasn’t. Time like this is precious to me, and I feel closer to Julian because of it.

  “I know what you meant, baby, and I agree. Now let’s get you back to work.” He takes my hand, and we walk toward my building. We stop in front, and Julian tilts my face up so I’m looking into his beautiful eyes. They’re mesmerizing. He says what I want to hear.

  “Can I see you tomorrow night?”

  “Yes, please.”

  Julian kisses me tenderly on the lips and turns to walk away. I’m opening the door to my building when he calls my name. I turn to look at him and see him place his hand over his heart. It’s the same gesture he made before he pulled away in his car that first night at my house. I interpret it to mean I’ve touched his heart. He definitely has touched mine today. I respond with the same motion and walk into the building on a cloud of air. I send him a text before I get in the elevator.

  Alexa: I already miss you

  He replies immediately.

  Julian: Yo también, corazón. Yo también.

  Lauren is sitting at my desk when I walk in. Apparently a customer I had been working with is coming back in today, and she was looking for information on their previous visit. I thank her for covering for me and tell her I’ll deal with these clients.

  “Good, because the woman seems like a real pain the in the ass.”

  I laugh because she’s right. “You’re so right, and they won’t be buying anything, so don’t feel left out.”

  I’m right. These clients are just wasting my time. It’s their third time in, and they’re no closer to making an offer. They do help the afternoon pass quicker though, and I’m thankful for that. All the talk about parents has made me think about mine, so I call my mom on the way home from work. We actually have a nice conversation, and she doesn’t bring up marriage once.

  I’m lying in bed at eleven watching a taped episode of Dancing with the Stars. I love watching Latin ballroom dancing. Tonight I can’t help but think about Julian and the way he danced with me the other night. The thought of him dancing with me actually makes me hot and bothered. I call him, and he answers right away. He sounds relaxed, and I wonder if I’m waking him up.

  “Hey, you. I was just about to call. I just got home about twenty minutes ago.”

  “Hey, yourself. Did you have a nice night with your mom?”

  “I did. I told her about you.”

  Hmm … that’s kind of huge. I didn’t expect the conversation to lead off with that.

  “Really? What exactly did you tell her?”

  “She asked me what had put such a big smile on my face. I told her I met a girl.”

  I’m sure right now my smile is bigger than his.

  “And she let you off the hook with that answer? No asking for details?”

  “No. I think she was too busy picking her mouth up off the floor to ask details. That will come later.”

  I steer the subject back to more neutral territory because the whole parent thing makes me uncomfortable. “What time are you coming over tomorrow?”

  “Probably around seven. I want to run tomorrow, and I’m not sure if I’ll be up for it in the morning. I’m pretty tired.”

  “Come here, and we can run together. I want to get a workout in too.”

  “That sounds like a good plan, Alexa. I love the idea of watching you get all hot and sweaty.”

  “Well if that’s the case, let’s skip the run and work out some other way.”

  “We can get hot and sweaty, then clean, then hot and sweaty all over again. I promise you’ll get a good workout.”

  “Promises, promises, Julian.”

  “Have I broke one yet, Alexa? He’s referring to his promises of hot sex, but when I answer, I’m not just talking about sex.”

  “No, Julian, you haven’t.” I say it softly.

  “And I won’t, baby. I won’t.”

  We say our good-byes and hang up the phone. I fall into a deep sleep and don’t dream about anything at all.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Tuesday ends up being a super busy day at work. My clients who wrote an offer a few weeks ago are back in to finalize details and make their final selections. It’s just me today, because Lauren took the day off, and Ramon is sick. I’m with clients almost the entire day, and before I know it, it’s almost six thirty. Julian and I had exchanged texts earlier in the morning confirming he was going to be over at seven and that we would get dinner after our run. He told me he was going to be busy and in meetings all day, so I didn’t expect to really hear from him. I find I’m okay with not talking to him because I know I’ll be seeing him tonight.

  I end up leaving work a little late and pull into my driveway just a few minutes before Julian does. He gets out of his car and grabs an overnight bag from the backseat. I take this to mean he’s spending the night, and I couldn’t be happier. He’s already dressed to run in orange running shorts and a loose, black tank top. Yum. Yes, that’s what I think. He’s yummy. He walks to where I’m waiting for him and leans in for a kiss. Double yum.

  “Nice shoes, Alexa.”

  Julian is staring at my feet and smiling. I love that he appreciates my love affair with shoes. I’m wearing a pair of Dianne Von Furstenberg rose-and-black, snake print, strappy stiletto sandals. They’re a little bold, so I’m wearing them with a simple, black shirtdress.

  “Thank you, Julian. Sorry I’m running late. Work was busy today.”

  We talk about our days a little as we walk through the house to my room. It feels good to be able to talk to Julian about what I do for a living. I know he gets it because he’s in the business, and it’s great common ground for us. He sets his stuff in the corner of my room and sits down on the bed. We’re still talking about work, but a vivid image of his naked body in my bed flashes through my mind, and I have to turn and walk into the closet before I end up on, or in, the bed with him. I hang my dress up, put my shoes away, and walk out in my bra and panties. My workout clothes are in a drawer across the room, and I have to walk by Julian to get there. As soon as I’m close enough, h
e grabs me and pulls me into his arms. He’s sitting on the bed, and I’m standing between his legs. His face is at the same level as my breasts. I can feel his hot breath on my skin, and I start to feel flush. Okay, walking out half naked was a bad idea. Or, a good idea. I can’t decide.

  “Mmm … Are you teasing me, Alexa?” He’s kissing my stomach and that spot just between my breasts with soft gentle kisses.

  “Who’s teasing who here?” Julian laughs as I pull away and keep walking to my dresser. My heart is racing, and I need to get some clothes on quickly if we’re planning on leaving my room. I put on a neon-orange-and-gray-striped tank and gray running shorts. I grab a pair of socks and get my shoes out of my closet. Julian follows me into my closet, and I bump into him when I turn around.

  “Hello. Did you need to borrow something to wear?”, I ask jokingly.

  “Nope, just wanted to see where all of your shoes live.” He looks around at the shoe boxes that take up more than half of my closet. “Looks like you’re going to need to build an addition here soon.”

  I feel like I’ve been caught with my hand in the cookie jar.

  I walk around him and out of the closet. I don’t make jokes about my shoes because I know I’m a little excessive about it.

  “It works for now, but I’ll make sure their next home is bigger.”

  “Next home? Are you planning on moving?” He has a concerned look on his face.

  “Eventually. Probably before the end of the year.”

  “Why?”

  “Well, I’m not sure if I mentioned it, but Marissa is engaged, and her fiancé, Kevin, is stationed overseas. He’ll be back in November, and they most likely will either move out of state or move in together. And Shannon practically lives with Cory as it is. I see them making it official around that time too. This is her uncle’s place, and as soon as she goes, I’m sure we all will.”

  None of this is new news, but for some reason saying it all out loud like that just totally bummed me out. Julian’s next question doesn’t help either. “Where will you live then?”

  “No clue.” This really isn’t a good subject. Julian senses it and changes the topic.

  “You ready to go?”

  “Yep.” We walk outside and stretch for a few minutes before we take off. I pull my hair back into a ponytail and ask Julian how far he wants to run. We agree on seven miles. I have a couple of different routes I run, and he lets me lead the way. I’ve been thinking about running with Julian ever since we talked about it last night. I’ve been wondering how fast he runs, if he likes to talk, does he listen to music? I have no idea what his routine is, so I just do my thing and hope for the best. After about five minutes, I realize Julian is going to let me dictate the pace. I run at a decent speed, and he clearly has no issues keeping up. We don’t talk at all, which is actually okay with me. I usually use this time to think. I really started running after Brady died. I found that the rhythmic pounding of my feet on the pavement would block out the demons I was fighting. Pretty soon I grew to enjoy it. It’s a different type of therapy for me and something I need to do at least a few times a week.

  The only thing I can think about today though is this gorgeous man running next to me. Julian left his T-shirt at my house, and out of the corner of my eyes I keep catching glimpses of the muscles in his legs, stomach, and arms flexing. I can’t look directly at him because I know it will be too distracting. His body really is stunning, and I smile on the inside knowing I’ll be enjoying it later tonight. Julian catches me sneaking a peek and winks at me. I know he knows I was checking him out. I can’t help but notice how in sync our bodies move as we run next to each other. Physically, we’re undoubtedly compatible. I pray we can stay on the same page emotionally as well. When we get back to my house, we go inside and grab a few water bottles. We sit in the kitchen as we cool down.

  “That was a good run.” I look at Julian, and he’s smiling, sweaty, and sexy as hell.

  “That was a great run. Great scenery.” I know he’s referring to me, and my heart swells. He makes me feel so confident and beautiful.

  Eventually, we head to my bedroom. I think about the shower we took together at Julian’s, and I hope for a repeat. However, it seems Julian has other ideas. He closes and locks the door behind us and takes his shoes off. I do the same. He pulls me to him and presses his sweaty body to mine. He does the same with his eager mouth. We haven’t really touched each other since Saturday night, and all of the desire we have been holding in comes pouring out of both of us. There are times when no words are needed, and this is one of those times. I can feel how much Julian wants me. There’s a quiet desperation in his touch, and I get it. I crave his touch as well, and tonight I’m not interested in him being tender or gentle with me. He pulls away from me for a moment and reaches down to get a condom from his bag. While his back is to me, I quickly finish undressing. His eyes blaze with lust when he turns and finds me naked. A soft groan escapes from his throat. He doesn’t say a word. He just pulls me up into his arms. I wrap my legs around him and let him carry me to the bed. I’m feeling a little self-conscious because we did just get back from a run, but Julian seems totally okay with not taking a shower first.

  Julian sits me down near the edge of the bed so my legs still touch the floor. He positions himself over me, between my legs, and presses his erection into me. I lift my legs and wrap them around his waist and pull him closer. He rocks into me several more times, and each time I feel the heat of his hard penis pressing against my bare sex through his shorts. I’m dying to feel his skin against mine, so I reach up and pull both his running and compression shorts down. I wrap my hand around his hard shaft and stroke him firmly. He allows me to pleasure him this way for a few minutes, and I’m so turned on by the look of lust in his eyes that I can’t help but move my hips in a small circular motion. He finally stands straight up, and I’m forced to let go of him. His eyes stay on me as he rolls the condom on. He strokes himself a few times, and I feel the heat that has been building between my legs start emanating throughout my body. He’s biting his lower lip in an incredibly erotic way, and I want his lips back on mine. I no longer feel shy or self-conscious. I feel hot, horny, and needy.

  “Kiss me.” The words sound like the command they are.

  Julian bends down and places his lips on mine. He pushes his tongue into my mouth at the same time he pushes his finger into my swollen sex. I don’t wait for him to ask me if I’m ready or if I want him. I’m beyond ready, and I tell him so.

  “Yes. I’m ready for you, Julian. All of you. Please, I want you inside of me. Please.”

  No sooner are the words out of my mouth than I feel Julian’s hardness slide into me. It feels incredible, and I instantly feel connected to him in a way I haven’t for a few days. He starts out in a slow rhythm, making sure I’m comfortable with him inside of me. I savor the feeling of his gentle strokes but quickly realize I want more. I wrap my hand around the back of his neck and pull him down so my lips are on his ear. I suck on his earlobe and dip my tongue in his ear. I can taste the sweat on him, and it makes me wetter. I whisper what I want from him.

  “Fuck me, Julian.”

  Julian’s whole body tenses, and he pauses. I imagine he’s thinking he heard me wrong. He pulls back so he’s looking at me.

  “Otra vez, Alexa.”

  I was right. He wants me to say it again.

  “I want you to fuck me, Julian.”

  Oh wow. Now I know what happens when Julian is given that green light. He wraps one arm under my ass and scoots me further up the bed without pulling out. He lifts my left leg in the air and rests it on his shoulder. My right leg is bent at the knee, and he pushes it out gently with the palm of his hand. Then Julian does exactly what I asked him to. He fucks me, hard, and with each thrust I feel my body open for him. This is exactly what I needed and wanted. I close my eyes and let myself get lost in the stead
y rhythm. I feel a delicious touch on my sex, and I open my eyes to see Julian working me with his fingers. I’m swollen and sensitive, and the pressure of Julian’s hard dick against my clit has left me very aroused. I arch my back and raise my hips in the air. Julian slows down his thrusting and focuses on getting me off. It doesn’t take long for me to orgasm, and when he feels the rush start in me, he resumes his driving rhythm. I look up at him, and we lock eyes. His own release quickly follows, and I don’t look away until the very last shudder of Julian’s orgasm subsides.

  Julian slowly pulls out of me, and we lay there next to each other as we catch our breath and come down from that incredible high. I turn on my side and look at him. He’s staring at the ceiling and looks deep in thought. Julian has been pretty quiet all night, and it’s starting to make me question if something is going on with him. He’s acting normal, but not talking.

  “You’re very quiet tonight, Julian. You haven’t said more than a hundred words since you got here.”

  He gives me a little smile but still doesn’t say anything.

  “Okay. You stay here and keep being quiet. I’m going to go shower, and then we can eat.” I’m only half joking. What’s up with him?

  I start to get off the bed, and he grabs me and pulls me back down so I’m under him. He’s propped up on one elbow and rests his other hand on my belly.

  “There are a million things I want to say to you, Alexa. I’m quiet because if I open my mouth and start talking, I’m not sure what’s going to come out. You’re not ready for all this, and I don’t want you to run.”

  His words scare me. Ready for what? What is he hiding from me that would cause me to run? Oh crap. He also has some big secret he’s keeping. I don’t want to know, but I have to know.

  “You said no secrets, Julian. What the hell are you hiding from me?” My voice is shaky when it comes out, and it’s evident I’m scared by whatever it is I think he’s going to say.