Faith (My Misery Muse)

by B. Betzold

  I stopped cold. “How did you…”

  “I was there that day at his house, I know what that sounds like.” He winked at me.

  “Prick.”

  “Cum guzzling gutter slut.”

  “Man whore.”

  “Yep.”

  Xavier

  I unwrapped my arm from Cait and attempted to wiggle my phone from out of my pocket, without waking up Jaks. I sighed, how the hell does Devi do this and make it look simple?

  Just about to the point I thought I may have to gnaw off a hand or something, Seth walked around the corner and stopped, stared then started laughing—fucking asshole.

  “You are an asshole, you know that?”

  He nodded and kept laughing. “How did you manage this?”

  “The women in this house turned on me and piled kids on me,” I snapped and he started laughing again.

  “Oh that’s great, I should so get a picture of this and upload it to our fan site. I am sure the women would love it.”

  “I swear to god, Seth, I will beat the living shit out of you,” I sniped back.

  “If you are done laughing, can you call Sam and tell him Mags is running late?”

  He waved it off. “I already talked to him, Devi showed up a few minutes ago, apparently her client wanted to change the design, again, so Cris sent her away from the shop.”

  “Is this the guy who had already changed it like four times?”

  “This was change number six.”

  “Devi may hurt him,” I said.

  “That’s why Cris sent her home, he was afraid she was about to stab him.”

  Just about then Jaks sat up rubbing his eyes. “Who is mommy stabbing now?”

  I laughed, it’s got to say something when your kid doesn’t even blink at the thought of you stabbing someone.

  “No one Jaks,” Seth told him.

  He shrugged. “Can I get a juice?”

  “No,” a yell from the kitchen was heard. Huh, I didn’t realize Ash was in there.

  Seth shrugged. “Sorry, you heard the boss, go ask her nicely for a bottle of water.”

  He grumbled about that but went in the kitchen.

  “So how was Sam when you talked to him?”

  “A dick, I don’t know what his problem is, but he either needs to talk about it or get it figured out before Devi hurts him.”

  Devi and Sam have not been getting along lately, and Sam was still being an ass towards Mags, which pissed off Devi, hell it pissed me off too.

  “Your kid drools.”

  He smirked. “I know.”

  “You are an ass.”

  “I know.”

  I sighed and got comfy in the couch and closed my eyes, might as well nap with two of my favorite girls.

  Chapter 30

  Mags

  It took ten days for them to start reducing the sedation medication. They finally got the infection in his leg under control. Then they moved him into a private room yesterday, after finally determining that the swelling around his spine had gone down, and there seemed to be no damage. So Devi and I sat here waiting for Drake to wake up, we knew it might take hours, if not days for that to happen, but neither of us were willing to let him wake up alone.

  Devi sat on a couch thing under a window sketching, and I sat beside his bed holding his hand reading a book. Nurses came in at times to check on him and to slowly reduce the medications that kept him sleeping. We were there a few hours when Seth and X came in with all three kids. Jaks came and stood beside me staring at Drake.

  “Is he still sleeping?” whispered Jaks.

  “Yea buddy, he is.”

  “Well I will be quiet then,” he whispered and sat beside Devi.

  “Any news?”

  “Nope, they are almost finished taking him off the meds, after that it’s just more wait and see,” said Devi.

  “Ash wanted to know if you guys would nurse the babies, she wants to make sure she has enough milk to last the night,” Seth mentioned.

  “Of course,” I replied and took Quinn from X. “Hi sweetheart, Drake the babies are here to see you, all three of them.”

  “We can talk to him,” Jaks questioned.

  Devi laughed. “Yea buddy, we talk to him all the time, why you want to?”

  Jaks nodded. “Uncle Drake, I miss you, and I have so much I have to tell you.” From there he was off telling Drake about everything that had happened to him since the accident and Devi and I nursed the girls listening to him.

  About fifteen minutes later, the nurse came in and looked around, I am sure we looked a little odd, Devi and I sitting here nursing our babies, Jaks talking along, and Seth and X sitting back watching.

  “Well there certainly are more people here this time,” she noted then went around Drake's bed to his IV. “Well, this will end the medicine, now it’s up to him,” she said.

  She took more information then started to leave. “The doctor should be in soon.” She smiled at Jaks then left.

  “So have either of you eaten?” X questioned.

  We both shook our heads and he groaned. “You do realize you have been sitting up here like six hours, right?”

  We looked at each other and then back and him and shook our heads.

  He looked over at Seth. “Man, these are the only two people on earth who can sit in a hospital for hours and not notice and we are leaving them alone together”

  Seth shrugged. “Not much we can do about it, unless you wanna hang out here with them.”

  “Oh no, not me, you could stay.”

  He shook his head. “Can’t do it, I have a phone call with lawyers in a few hours.”

  “You know we are adults,” Devi quipped and both guys turned and stared at her. “Hey, we are, we can take care of ourselves.”

  “Uh huh,” replied X, “well, we can’t text them cause they’ll just ignore it, and a phone call won’t work for the same reason.”

  Seth agreed, “So guess you’ll have to stay.”

  “Nope, not staying, can’t do it.”

  “Why not?”

  “I have,” he glanced towards Devi, “plans.”

  “I swear Xavier if you have,” she glanced over at Jaks, “relations on my kitchen counter again, I will cut it off.”

  I snickered which caused Devi to glare at me. “What it’s funny.”

  “Really, you wanna walk in to your kitchen and find your cousin and best friend servicing the maid on your kitchen counter?”

  “Uhm, no thanks.”

  “Yea, I didn’t either, not a mental image I needed burned in my brain.”

  Seth and X were laughing, and I was trying really hard not to.

  Jaks looked at us. “He’s going to get his groove on with Cin.” Then he went back to talking to Drake.

  Devi glared at X and X stared at Jaks slack mouthed. “I swear to you Devi, I never told him anything like that.”

  “Cin did,” Jaks said.

  “Oh that girl is about to get her ass chewed, and not in a good way,” X seethed then left.

  “How is there a good way to have your—”

  “Jaks say bye to your mom, Uncle Drake and Aunt Mags,” Seth interrupted before he lost a band mate.

  Jaks shrugged then did as he was told, I kissed Quinn’s head and strapped her back in the car seat and Devi did the same with Cait.

  “Devi can you help me take them all down to the car?” he asked.

  She nodded and grabbed Cait’s car seat and he grabbed Quinn’s. “Be right back.”

  “Drake, our family is not normal.”

  I had dozed off at some point, and I sat up suddenly not sure where I was or what had woken me. I glanced around and remembered I was in Drake's hospital room. I looked over and Devi was passed out on the couch, then I glanced over at Drake, he was still sleeping. I sat there wandering what had woken me when I felt his fingers clench around mine. My eyes went back to his face and saw him swallow and his Adam's apple bob.

  “Drake, honey, y
ou hear me?”

  His fingers clenched around mine again. “Can you open your eyes, honey?” I watched his eyes flutter a few times then finally his beautiful blue eyes were staring into mine.

  “Hey baby, glad to see your back with us,” I whispered and ran my fingers through his hair. “We’ve missed you.”

  He swallowed again. “Your throat dry?” He nodded his head and I tried to remove my hand from his to grab the little water pitcher and call the nurse but he squeezed my hand.

  “I’m not going anywhere, Drake, just going to grab the water pitcher, okay?” He let go of my hand, watching my every move.

  After I poured some water, I brought it back to him and held the straw up to his lips. “Just a small sip okay?” He nodded his head and complied.

  I picked up the tissue box beside me on the little rolling table and threw it at Devi, she jerked up. “What the fuck is your problem, Mags?”

  “Someone is awake,” I said still watching Drake, she jerked upright and looked at Drake.

  “Hey bro,” she said, “welcome back,”

  She looked over at me. “Not long, still need to call the nurse.”

  She nodded and pressed the call button for someone to come in.

  We were waiting for the nurse when Drake tried to talk for the first time. “How how…”

  “How long?” I asked.

  He nodded his head. “It’s been ten days since the accident, do you remember the accident?”

  He shook his head no, and I gave Devi a worried look, she gave me one back. “You were hit by a drunk driver on your way home from X’s house.”

  He nodded his head. “You remember being at X’s?”

  He nodded his head, and I was relieved he seemed to remember that. The nurse came bustling into the room at this point and I looked up at her and smiled.

  “So he’s finally awake,” she said then started messing with machines and writing it all down. “A doctor should be in shortly.” With that, she was gone again.

  “Did she remind you of a hummingbird?” asked Devi.

  “Yea kinda,” I replied still staring at the door she left out of, I shook myself and looked back at Drake. “So anything else you want to know?”

  He nodded his head and opened his mouth but nothing came out. He had a frustrated look on his face shook his head and tried again. What the hell?

  “You okay, Drake?” Devi asked, concern written on her face.

  He shook his head no and pointed at his leg.

  “Does your leg hurt?” she asked.

  He shook his head again, and looked up at me, frustration clear in his eyes. “You want to know what’s wrong with you?”

  He nodded. “Okay well, you broke your leg in three places so they had to put a titanium bar, pins and a plate in your leg. You broke your wrist, also a few ribs are cracked and broken. There was some swelling on your spine but it’s gone down, and they don’t see any problems with it. Your lung collapsed, and you tore a small hole in the tissue surrounding your heart but they were able to fix that in surgery.”

  He nodded his head so I continued, “You are going to need more time in the hospital, then some physical therapy afterwards. We’re not quite sure what else at this point.”

  He nodded his head and closed his eyes. I ran my hands through his hair and he started humming in the back of his throat, so I continued doing it giving Devi a look, she nodded.

  “I am going to go find that doctor,” she said then left the room, we were both a little freaked out about the not talking thing.

  Devi

  I walked into the hall and took a deep breath, maybe it was just confusion or something, but I knew, I knew that something wasn’t right with my brother.

  I walked up to the nurses’ station. “When will the doctor be by to see Drake Porter?”

  She looked at me like I was crazy. “Well probably sometime in the morning.”

  “There is something wrong,” I said. “He’s not able to really talk, it’s like he’s trying but nothing comes out.”

  She finally started to take me seriously. “I will call the on call doctor immediately.”

  “Thank you,” I said then turned around and pulled out my cell.

  “Hey baby,” mumbled a sleepy Seth.

  “He’s awake,” I said, “but something isn’t right, Seth.”

  “Ok baby, calm down, what’s going on?”

  “He’s awake, and he understands, but he’s not talking. It’s like he can’t talk, he tries and he tries and he’s so frustrated because it’s just not coming out,” I told my husband wiping the tears from my eyes.

  “Okay, Devi what did the doctors say,”

  “We haven’t seen one, I just talked to the nurse and she’s going to have the on call doctor come and see him.”

  “Okay well, let’s find out what he has to say, okay? Deep breath baby, we will deal with it, and it might be nothing.”

  I took a deep breath. “Okay Seth, and I love you; I will call you when I know more.”

  “Okay honey, need me to come up?”

  “No, not yet, stay and be there for the kids in the morning.”

  “K baby, love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  I hung up and went back to my brother's room taking one more deep breath before I opened the door and pasted on a smile—I could do this.

  Chapter 31

  Mags

  The doctor wasn’t able to tell us much about what was going on, only citing he would need more tests. Great—just what we wanted to wait more.

  “You okay, Drake?”

  He nodded his head.

  “Any pain?”

  He shook his head.

  “Am I annoying you?”

  He shook his head.

  Well, this is fun. “You tired?”

  He shook his head.

  “Okay then.”

  Devi laughed. “May want to take advantage here, Mags, for once he can’t interrupt you.”

  He flipped her off then looked at me intrigued.

  “You going to leave?”

  “Oh no, not on your life.”

  I sighed. I should have known. I took a deep breath. “So you were asleep a long time, and we didn’t know if you were going to be okay, and it caused me to do a lot of thinking,” I rushed out, “and I realized something…”

  He looked at me and waited. He glanced over at Devi and she shrugged and pointed back at me he rolled his hand in a come on movement.

  “All right, I realized I love you, now I am not ready to go pick out china patterns or anything, but I am willing to try out a relationship.”

  His smile was dazzling and he pulled on my hand. I looked at him and he pulled again. What the hell?

  “I think he wants to kiss you, Mags,” Devi informed me, rolling her eyes.

  I looked back at Drake and he rolled his eyes at me too. “Well sorry,” I muttered then leaned down carefully so I wouldn’t hurt him and he kissed me, just a soft brush of lips against lips, then he grabbed the back of my head, pulled me into him further and really kissed me. I had missed him so much, and feeling his lips on mine was like heaven.

  Someone cleared their throat behind us and we looked over at Devi with her nose wrinkled, “Well that was unpleasant to watch.”

  Drake and I both flipped her off which caused her to giggle and then I kissed him again.

  The doctor came out of his room and entered some things onto his chart then finally made his way over to us. “I think Drake is suffering from a mild form of Expressive Aphasia. He can talk, he needs to talk, the more he talks the better this will get. Basically it means that he will forget words, he will be talking and know the word he wants to say but be unable to say it,” the doctor explained. “It could also happen when writing, or with numbers, there’s really no way to know at this point.”

  “Okay, what else can we do to help?” asked Devi.

  “I will set him up for some therapies to help with it,” the doctor answered
, “but the best thing is to talk, and not push when he has trouble.”

  We nodded and he left. Well, that sucked.

  We walked back into the hospital room and Drake looked up at us. “So you talked to the doctor.”

  We nodded.

  “What did he tell you?”

  “That you have something called Expressive Aphasia, they think, they want to do a few more tests.”

  I nodded.

  Devi walked over and hugged him carefully. “We’ll deal, bro.”

  “Yea, we’ve lived through worse.”

  “We have and we survived, just this time we know who to rely on.”

  He agreed, “Yea this time we have a real family.”

  “Speaking of family, they want to see you.”

  He nodded and opened his mouth and struggled for a minute. “Okay.”

  “Okay, Jaks wants to see you, to make sure you are okay. And well I figured you would want to see the girls.”

  “Yea.”

  “Okay, I will go make the call,” Devi glanced at me and smiled then left.

  “So did he tell you anything else?” I asked.

  “Nope, just that I had to talk, and he would set up some sort of therapy for me.”

  “That what he told us.”

  Drake

  “So did he tell you why you had such a hard time last night?” Mags asked me.

  “He said it was probably because of all the drugs that were working their way out of my system.”

  “That makes sense.”

  “So what’s going on between us?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, what is going on between us? You’ve been taking one step forward and two steps back for so long now, I want a clear cut answer, what are we doing?”

  She took a deep breath. “We are, if you still want to, going to try a real grown up relationship.”

  “You mean where you are my girl?”

  She nodded and bit her lip. “If you still want me.”

  “Mags,” I murmured, “have you not figured out that I love you yet?”

  She shrugged. “Not sure what that means.”

  “It means you are my girl, that Quinn is mine, and that one day hopefully soon you will marry me, but not until you are ready.”

  “I don’t know if I will ever be ready for that,” she whispered.