Taking a Knee

by Sean Ashcroft

  First ten minutes of the game, and he was already being carried off. Noah would have been humiliated if it was anyone other than Jace doing it.

  As it was, he leaned a little closer and let Jace’s presence soothe him. It was okay if it was Jace taking care of him.

  A tiny voice in the back of his head told him he was falling in love with him, but he was too sore to panic about it just yet. As long as Jace was the guy who could stand upright and save him from stopping play until he could walk himself, Noah couldn’t bring himself to care about anything else.

  That wasn’t true. He cared about how gentle Jace was being, how glad he was that Jace had been there, and how much he would have enjoyed this if his head wasn’t still spinning from the impact of Rafe’s elbow. But he couldn’t afford to think about it right now.

  Jace set him on the bench carefully and sat down next to him. The referee whistled, and everyone on the track got up from the kneeling position they’d taken when Noah had been hurt.

  “Don’t talk,” Jace said, shoving a water bottle into Noah’s hand as their replacements left the bench and headed onto the track. “Get your breathing under control.”

  Noah had barely realized that he was wheezing until Jace had pointed it out. He closed his eyes and dropped his head, spreading his knees apart to open his posture a little and let his lungs fill up properly. He probably should have tilted his head back, but it was spinning hard enough as it was.

  He felt so stupid for being taken out so badly by a misplaced elbow.

  Jace reached out and rubbed circles on Noah’s back with the palm of his hand. After a few moments of that, Noah managed to get his breathing back under control, desperate, sobbing gasps turning into deep breaths that made his chest pull, but made him feel less as though he was likely to pass out. He took his mouth guard out to sip the water Jace had given him, swirling it around his mouth before swallowing. The last thing he needed was for the nausea to come back and make him throw up in front of both teams and the crowd.

  “I know you wanna go straight back out there, but my medical opinion is that you should take a breather,” Jace said.

  “You’re not my real dad,” Noah responded automatically.

  Jace chuckled. “Are you saying you won’t call me daddy?”

  “I will have to file for divorce if you tell me you’d actually enjoy being called daddy.”

  “Can’t get rid of me that easy.” Jace patted Noah’s back and then took his hand away, but stayed close. “Scared me when I saw you not moving, man.”

  Noah took a bigger mouthful from the water bottle, considering his response to that. “Scared me to go down. It was good to hear your voice. Thanks.”

  “Anytime. In sickness and in health, remember?”

  Noah nodded. “I remember.” Noah took a deep breath and let it out slowly, wincing as he did so.

  “You’re really not okay, huh?”

  “I’ll be fine,” Noah said, fighting the urge to grab his chest. He wondered if this was what a heart attack felt like, though he knew that wasn’t what was happening. He couldn’t imagine it being much worse, though. “This gives the newer guys a few minutes to show us their stuff, anyway.”

  “I guess. So what happened?”

  Noah sighed. “I came around the corner too fast. I figured Rafe would see me, but he’s not like you with your weird spidey-senses about where people are. His elbow came out hard as I came up behind him and hit me square in the chest. I wasn’t expecting it, or I could have braced, I guess.”

  Jace hummed. “Rafe’s not exactly your good luck charm lately, is he?”

  “We work closely.” Noah shrugged. “It’s a hazard of the game. And I’m not as young as I was.”

  “A whole two years ago.” Jace laughed. “You’re not thinking about retirement, are you? Because injury aside, you were killing it out there.”

  “No. God, no. This is the only thing I do with my life that isn’t work. I’m not quitting.”

  “Good.” Jace nodded. “Good to hear. We all have off days, I guess. And this wasn’t your fault.”

  “I still feel like an asshole for letting it happen. That assist was awesome, though. Did you hear the crowd cheering?” Noah grinned. He liked being able to impress the crowd. It wasn’t the only reason he did derby, or even the main one, but it was a nice bonus.

  “Yeah, I heard. That was pretty cool.”

  “We make a great team,” Noah said.

  His brain reminded him of what he’d realized earlier. He was falling for Jace. Maybe he’d fallen for Jace a long time ago and was just beginning to see it for what it was. He couldn’t pinpoint the moment when friendship had crossed over into something else, that was for sure.

  It was also definitely not something he was about to tell Jace. Not now, probably not ever. They’d just gotten over the discomfort of their new lives and settled into a new normal. Noah didn’t want to upset that, especially not with something as big as this.

  “We are pretty great together,” Jace agreed. “No wonder everyone believed we were married.”

  “I haven’t forgotten that you slapped my ass, by the way.” Noah sipped his water again. “So you’re our designated driver tonight.”

  “I was gonna offer anyway,” Jace said. Noah wasn’t sure if that was true or not, though it did seem like the kind of thing Jace would do. He was a sweetheart, and spent most of his life thinking of other people. Noah wondered how the hell he did it, gave so much of himself away. Even after seeing him break down earlier, Jace’s ability to just get on with things was amazing. Jace was amazing.

  “Best husband ever.”

  “And don’t you forget it.” Jace nudged his shoulder.

  Noah stood from the bench, stretching his arms high above his head to test his chest for injury. The spot Rafe had hit still twinged, but he was as good as he was going to be without a hot shower and a night’s rest.

  “Coach?” he called out. “I’m ready whenever.”

  Coach Williams nodded. A moment later, she waved for Noah’s replacement to come off and Noah to go back on. They were going to win this match no matter what.

  Chapter Twelve

  Jace woke on the couch with Noah on top of him, and took a few minutes to remember how he’d ended up there in the first place. It came back to him slowly that Noah had fallen asleep leaning against him, and Jace hadn’t had the heart to make him move. He knew Noah’s chest had still hurt when they got home, and had been happy to see him resting at all.

  Now, though, they’d both regret it if they didn’t lie in an actual bed for a few hours before morning. The day after a bout brought enough soreness without compounding it by sleeping on the couch.

  He nudged Noah gently, earning himself a tiny, unhappy groan. Eventually, Noah raised his head, blinking dumbly at Jace.

  “Why am I here?” he asked, voice thick with sleep. Jace couldn’t help smiling at him. Noah was very cute when he’d just woken up, his hair tousled and his eyelids sleepy.

  “You fell asleep when we got home. I didn’t wanna move you before, but you’ll hate me in the morning if I let you sleep here.”

  “And I’m on top of you,” Noah said, as if the thought had just occurred to him. He rolled off Jace and stood in one surprisingly graceful, elegant movement. Noah was all grace, especially compared to Jace. He stretched his arms above his head.

  Jace glanced at the strip of skin Noah’s stretching exposed, the half-inch of his belly and hip where his jeans had slipped down and his t-shirt had ridden up. He wet his lips, and then looked away, wondering why he’d been staring at all. His face felt hot, a deep, unscratchable itch springing up in the pit of his stomach.

  Thankfully, Noah didn’t seem to have noticed.

  Jace sat up, rolling his shoulders and trying not to wince at how tight they were. He didn’t want Noah to think that was because of him.

  Especially since it was because of him. Jace didn’t mind, really. They’d managed to pull out from b
ehind and win the game, but Noah had worn himself out doing it. He wasn’t going to be a happy camper in the morning.

  Jace didn’t want to compound his woes by making him feel guilty as well.

  “I need to sleep,” Noah said, walking off before Jace could come up with a response. Jace heard Noah’s bedroom door open and then close behind him by the time he’d convinced himself to stand up.

  He groaned as he stood, feeling every day of his twenty-nine years. He wasn’t old, and he knew that, but he was starting to feel as though he’d left the peak of his physical condition. Constantly abusing his body had consequences now. Not that he intended to stop.

  Jace figured he had a good ten years on the track in him, and he’d only used two of them.

  Bed called him, and his mattress felt like falling into a fluffy cloud once he’d stripped off and let himself sink into it. He closed his eyes, fully expecting to fall asleep immediately.

  When that didn’t happen, a brief self-assessment revealed that he was half-hard. He had just been sleeping with a warm body on top of him, so it shouldn’t have been so much of a surprise. His dick didn’t know the warm body had been Noah. All it understood was that usually meant Jace had brought someone home.

  It had been a while since that had happened, too.

  Jace was almost too tired to bother jerking off, but he knew he wouldn’t sleep anytime soon if he didn’t. He shoved his hand into his underwear and closed his eyes, searching for a recent memory or thought for inspiration.

  He stroked his cock idly while he waited, humming softly as it hardened fully in his hand. Jace realized that he hadn’t done this since Noah had moved in, though he wasn’t sure why. He was pretty quiet on his own, and the walls weren’t so thin that he was worried Noah might hear him.

  His mind took him back five minutes, to when he’d just woken up with a warm weight pressed against him. Regardless of who it was, that had been a nice feeling. People didn’t sleep on top of Jace so often, but he loved it when they did. He was a big enough guy to take it, and Noah was comfortably heavy without being too much.

  A twinge of guilt hit him as he realized he was, more or less, thinking about Noah while he masturbated, but he brushed it aside. Noah wouldn’t ever know about it, and it wasn’t even Noah specifically. Just how much Jace liked people sleeping on top of him, leaning against him. How much he liked contact.

  All of his recent contact had been with Noah. Including his last kiss, which, despite being in public and with a guy, had still made his stomach swoop and his lips tingle. Noah was probably an awesome kisser when he meant it.

  Jace swallowed. That crossed the line into thinking about Noah.

  He paused mentally, wondering if that was a road he could go down and still look Noah in the eye tomorrow. He remembered the strip of bare skin, the curve of Noah’s hip, the way the lines of his muscles had disappeared down into his jeans, promising.

  The thought was like falling off a cliff, sudden and terrifying. But freeing, too. He could masturbate over his best friend. It was too late to stop, anyway. Freaking out about it was way more likely to make it a problem than just doing it.

  He’d never thought of a guy like this before, but Noah was different. Noah laughed at his jokes, and smiled at him when he entered a room, and fell asleep on the couch with his head on Jace’s shoulder. He gave out hugs and made Jace dinner, and it made sense that Jace would be attracted to him.

  That thought stopped Jace dead in his mental tracks again.

  He was attracted to Noah.

  He was attracted to Noah. Physically attracted. He wanted the hugs and the kisses and the gentle touching.

  He wanted… he wanted Noah to knock on his door, tell him he’d been thinking about Jace, and climb into the bed, on top of him, warm and enthusiastic, pressing wet kisses into his neck. Whispering urgently into Jace’s ear about how badly he wanted him, hot breath making Jace’s skin tingle. He wouldn’t pause or hesitate, he’d just lean in and take what he wanted.

  Jace spread his legs as heat built between them, accepting that this was where his fantasy was going. His cock was fully hard by now, leaking precome, his balls getting tight and heavy.

  Imaginary Noah kissed his neck again, humming softly. His hands trailed down Jace’s sides, tickling the sensitive skin there, pausing at the waistband of his underwear. He hooked his fingers in and pulled them down, freeing his cock to spring up against his stomach.

  Jace gasped at the cool air and paused with his hand wrapped around his cock, wetting his lips. Need urged him on, his thighs tense and his balls tight. He gritted his teeth and sped up his strokes, feeling sweat trickle down his neck.

  Noah might have been a man, but Jace was still into it. He’d never thought about how sexy it could be to look up and see strong thighs, dark hair trailing down to a thick, hard cock, a firm chest instead of soft breasts. It was so hot he didn’t know how to process it, his brain going into overload as his body took over, speeding his strokes even more, making his hips jerk into his hand.

  In Jace’s mind, Noah sat up, grinning at him and swatting Jace’s hand away, replacing it with his own. Jace wasn’t sure if his memory was making Noah look the way he wanted, or if Noah was actually as beautiful as he was remembering him now. Still masculine, though. All hard edges and low voice as he murmured about how gorgeous Jace was, how he’d always wanted him, how he was going to get him off and then fuck him until he begged for mercy.

  Heat built low in Jace’s stomach, his hips rocking in time with Noah’s strokes. He could see that Noah was hard, too, his cock dark with blood. He moved to rub his hips against Jace’s, his mouth falling open and head tilting back at the sensation, delighted laughter bubbling up from his throat. Jace could almost feel the velvet-soft skin of Noah's cock trailing over his stomach, and ghosted his fingers over the spot to enhance the sensation. He bit down on his lip to stifle a moan, his hips arching off the mattress.

  Jace wanted to reach out and touch, feel Noah’s strong thighs under his hands, cup the curve of his ass. He knew what roller derby did for a body, and he wanted to feel every inch of Noah’s. A tiny, needy whimper broke free of his throat, and Jace closed his eyes tight, focusing on the fantasy in his mind.

  He let it take hold until he could almost feel the weight of Noah’s hips on top of his, rocking against him, breathy gasps and soft moans punctuating the rhythm. Imaginary Noah sped up, gripping Jace’s cock tighter, pulling and twisting just right, leaving Jace writhing helplessly under him, desperate for release.

  Jace bit down on his lips as he came, stars exploding behind his eyelids. The force of it made him gasp for air, but he stopped himself short of crying out. The last thing he needed was for Noah to come in and find out what he’d been doing. Even if he would undoubtedly accept that masturbation was a normal thing, and he didn’t have the ability to read minds and know that Jace had been thinking about him.

  The comedown was quick, an uncomfortable feeling settling in his stomach even as his mind supplied the memory of Noah lying on top of him again, settling down and snuggling up, kissing his ear and whispering good night. The image was so clear Jace might almost have believed it really happened.

  He had a lot of thinking to do.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “Oh my god,” Noah said to himself as he looked in the mirror. The bruise in the center of his chest was a sight to behold, black at the center and radiating out in shades of purple and green. He absolutely had to show Jace.

  He walked out into the kitchen without getting dressed, hearing Jace already up and making breakfast. The smell of bacon made Noah’s stomach rumble. Jace was in the habit of making enough for both of them, and Noah was very fond of that habit. Otherwise, anything more complex than toast was impossible for breakfast.

  “Hey,” Jace said without looking at him. “Wow,” he added once he turned, blinking at Noah. “Holy shit.”

  “Right? I have to take a picture for the team blog. This is amazing.”


  “Doesn’t it hurt?” Jace asked, concern in his voice. Noah’s stomach fluttered at knowing Jace cared, but he pushed the feeling aside. Of course he cared. They were friends.

  “Oh, yeah. I feel like an elephant stepped on my chest. It hurts to breathe,” Noah admitted. “So I guess it’s a couch and movies day for me.”

  “Which it would have been anyway,” Jace pointed out. Noah made no secret of the fact that Sundays were his day off. Jace, he remembered, had a shift starting in the afternoon.

  “True. I’ll think of you making tiny people happy while I lie around on the couch and eat my own weight in ice cream.”

  Jace snorted. “I’ll think about joining you in that while I make tiny people happy.”

  Noah went to the corner of the kitchen that he knew had great selfie lighting to take a picture of his bruise. It was definitely one for the blog. He’d never seen a bruise so spectacular on another skater.

  While Noah was immortalizing his injury for the world, Jace was serving breakfast. Noah went to the table and sat in his usual spot, waiting eagerly to eat.

  A plate of bacon and store-bought pancakes appeared in front of him a few moments later. Post-bout recovery food at its finest. Noah’s stomach rumbled again, and he grinned up at Jace.

  “Best husband,” Noah said as he grabbed his fork, waiting until Jace was done with the maple syrup before pouring a generous helping over his own pancakes.

  “I’m just hoping you’ll put out later,” Jace joked. He couldn’t even manage that with a straight face, a blush appearing high on his cheeks. Noah adored him.

  It wasn’t ideal to be in love with him, but he could cope. The feeling would fade eventually when it got no encouragement at all, and even if it didn’t… well, he wasn’t the first gay man to fall for a straight guy. Such was the tragedy of not everyone being bisexual. Some people were going to fall for people who weren’t interested in a million years.

  “I am a cheap date,” Noah said. “But I’m married now, so I’m off-limits.”