Taking Chances

by Flowers, Loni

  Clair looked at him like he was crazy. “Oh, I see. You didn’t have a death wish or anything, did you?” she teased.

  “No, not really, though after everything I’d been through, I can honestly say I didn’t care what happened to me.”

  “I understand what you mean. I’ve felt the same, many times.” She knew the conversation was moving in the wrong direction. She didn’t want to darken the mood by saying she never cared it she lived or died while roaming the streets, so she asked, “Did the psychic teach you anything?”

  “Not really,” he said, shrugging his shoulders, “just how to look at someone’s hand and make assumptions. That’s about it. It was stupid really, just something to make a buck.”

  “Show me,” she said, holding her palm out. “Tell me what you see.”

  “But I don’t really know anything. I never paid much attention to that crazy lady.”

  “Then just humor me.”

  Turning her palm upward, Alex held her hand in his. “So basically you have lines that run all across your hand, but there are main lines you’re supposed to concentrate on. Each line has a different name: the life line, head, heart, health, and marriage line.”

  He traced each line with the tip of his finger. His touch was light, sending goose bumps all over her arms.

  “This line here is your heart line. If I remember correctly, it means you are a loving woman and deeply passionate with the people you care about; the longer the line, the greater the passion and love. I think your heart line is as long as it can get,” he smiled.

  “I guess that’s a good thing,” Clair said.

  “If you believe in that sort of thing… it’s very good.”

  Alex stopped drawing on her hand, still holding it between his, with his eyes locked on hers. He leaned in, searching her face, indecision visible in his expression. Clair’s stomach dropped, she knew he was about to kiss her and she needed to pull away, but she couldn’t. His eyes were warm and welcoming, his lips, soft and inviting. For the first time tonight, she really wanted him to kiss her. Even though she knew she shouldn’t let it happen.

  “I have something for you,” he said, leaning back. He pulled the necklace she’d been looking at earlier from his pocket, letting the chain dangle from his finger.

  Clair gasped, covering her mouth with her hand in surprise.

  “I saw you looking at this earlier and I want you to have it. I think it’s just what you need.”

  “Alex, no, you shouldn’t have.”

  “I wanted to. Can I put it on you?”

  Clair hesitated before turning her back to him. He swept her hair aside and wrapped the necklace around her neck. “Thank you,” she said, facing him again.

  “It’s supposed to catch all your dreams. They pass through the web and slide down the feathers to the sleeper. The bad dreams get caught in the net, disappearing with the light of day.

  “Thank you. It’s beautiful.” Her eyes burned with tears. She wanted to cry over his thoughtfulness but she bit her bottom lip, holding them back.

  Alex lightly slid his finger along her collarbone, tracing the outline of the necklace. “I hope it keeps your nightmares away,” he whispered, before tenderly kissing her on the forehead.

  Clair’s breath caught in her throat, her heart pounding in her chest, as she felt the warmth of his lips against her skin. His lips lingered on her forehead and she closed her eyes, wanting more. It was wrong and against her better judgment, but she wanted to feel desired. From the look in Alex’s eyes, he did too.

  But instead of kissing her, Alex reached for her hand and stood up. “Let’s get you home.”

  Nodding, Clair stood, holding his hand and they walked back to his car. She couldn’t help feeling a twinge of disappointment that he had again avoided kissing her for the second time. Maybe he wasn’t interested in her after all. She thought that was probably a good thing. She didn’t need to get involved in the first place, no matter how much she thought she might want it.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Alex

  Alex glanced over at Clair in the passenger seat. She stared out the window as if lost in thought. Her fingers pulled the charm on her necklace back and forth across the chain around her neck. The night definitely went better than he thought it would even though he didn’t really know what to expect. He glanced at his watch and it was a little after eleven. But he liked being with Clair and wasn’t ready for their night to end. Alex couldn’t deny the attraction he felt towards her. He had only dated a few girls after Mia, and when he did, it never lasted. Clair was different. She was vulnerable and stubborn, but determined. And she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. But more than anything, they could relate to each other since both had lived on the streets. He had to ask her out again. He wanted to know her better.

  When he pulled up in the driveway, Roz’s car wasn’t there. “She must be at Stu’s again,” he said. “I don’t know why she even bothers living here. She spends all her time with him.”

  “Have they been together long?” Clair asked, facing him.

  “A couple years, I think. I’m surprised they haven’t gotten married yet. They’re perfect for each other. After everything Stu’s been through, he could really use someone like Roz. She’s great.”

  “Yes she is. He’d be lucky to have her, I’m sure.”

  Alex walked around and opened Clair’s door, helping her out as she jumped down. He followed her as she walked to the far end of the yard and sat in the grass. Lying back, she looked up toward the black sky. Alex laughed as he looked down at her. “You know, if you’re that tired, I can get my blanket out of the car for you.”

  Clair gave a small smile, tapping the grass beside her with her hand. “I miss it, ya know?”

  “Miss what?” he asked, sitting beside her.

  “I don’t know, the quietness, the stars. It’s just different. I know, it sounds stupid… it’s just, I’ve been on my own for so long without anyone caring. It’s a little overwhelming having someone care about me now; especially when they hardly know me. Everything Roz has done, I mean, who even does that?”

  Alex watched her. She was so animated when she talked. Her face lit up with expressions, her hands waved through the air as if she needed them to help her communicate. Everything was light and easy going until dinner was over. Since the drive home, Clair seemed sad, but Alex let her ramble, venting whatever was bottled up inside her.

  “And you,” she said, looking over at Alex, “if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be here.” Clair sat up, crossing her legs up under her. “And this date—I mean, this hanging out we did tonight. It was the best night I’ve had since I left home. Thank you for that.” She picked blades of grass with her fingers, tearing them into tiny pieces. “You didn’t have to take me out, but you did it anyway.”

  His eyes traveled up her arms to her neck. Her skin looked so fair and soft under the moonlight, it made him want to run his hands over it. “You don’t have to thank me. I wanted to take you out tonight. I’m happy you said yes. It’s been quite some time since I’ve been out on date.” Yes, a date. He didn’t want to just “hang out”; no, he wanted to know everything about her. To hold her hand, touch her skin, and taste her lips. But would she want the same things as he? He still didn’t know.

  “Oh, and this,” she said, holding the charm out from around her neck, “you shouldn’t have bought me this. But I do love it. Thank you.”

  Alex leaned forward, taking the charm between his fingers. “I’m glad I saw you looking at it. It looks perfect on you.” He laid the charm down against her chest. Lightly, he traced his fingers up the side of her neck, her hair cupped around her face. Alex stared straight into her eyes, dark under the night’s sky. Her lips parted slightly and Alex could feel her breath quicken on his skin. He wanted nothing more than to feel her lips on his. He slipped his hand further up Clair’s neck and heard her breath catch as if she’d stopped breathing. With his face only inches away from h
er mouth, he whispered, “If you don’t want me to kiss you right now, you’d better tell me.”

  Clair

  Clair’s heart was racing. She’d been imagining what his kiss would feel like all night. Now he was telling her he was going to kiss her and she couldn’t breathe. He was so close; his breath seemed to caress her lips as he spoke. Leaning forward, he covered her mouth with his, weaving his fingers in her hair as he cupped the back of her head. His kiss was soft, a mere feather of a touch before he pulled away. She opened her eyes to see him looking back at her, his eyes questioning, longing for more. Clair responded to him, closing the distance between them, kissing him again. His palm slid across her neck, cupping her cheek. The sensation of his touch seemed foreign, like nothing she’d ever felt before; but she wanted more. He pulled back, brushing his thumb over her bottom lip. It was only a casual touch, but to Clair, it was the most erotic feeling she’d ever felt. She closed her eyes, aching for more. “Kiss me again,” she whispered.

  He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her tight against him as she parted her lips. Alex deepened his kiss, letting their tongues slide together in a rhythmic dance. Her shirt fell from around her shoulders, exposing the blouse beneath. Clair felt his hand move from her waist and glide up her arm to her shoulder. His fingers slid under one strap of her top, setting her skin on fire. Their kissing grew more urgent and Clair slid her palms over his firm chest, her fingers finding the buttons on his shirt. She undid the first few, brushing her fingers over his collarbone and up his neck. Alex moaned softly against her mouth before grasping her hands against his chest. He pulled away from her, resting his forehead against hers.

  “We should stop,” he whispered, trying to catch his breath.

  Clair pulled away; “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I shouldn’t have acted like that.” She covered her face with her hands, mortified at her own behavior.

  “No,” he said tenderly, pulling Clair’s hands away from her face, “it’s okay.”

  She looked down at the ground, her eyes burning with tears. Biting down on her lip, she tried desperately not to cry… again. One minute this date wasn’t a big deal and the next; she was aching for his touch. Her emotions were all over the place.

  Alex pulled her strap back over her shoulder and tilted her face up with the tip of his finger. He wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumb. “Trust me, Clair; it took a lot to make me stop myself.” He rubbed his thumb over her lips, “I wanted to kiss you all night.”

  “You could have. I wanted you to,” she said shyly.

  “Now you tell me. We could have skipped the ice cream,” he joked. “Come on, we better make our way to the house. I don’t think Roz would find it funny to see us sitting around in the grass when she comes home.” He stood up, helping her to her feet.

  They walked hand in hand to the house. “Thank you for tonight. It wasn’t at all what I expected.” She smiled, “And for this necklace.” Clair held the pendant in her hand, “It means a lot, thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. Can I see you tomorrow?”

  “I’d like that,” she said. “I don’t have to work, if you want to come over?”

  “How about lunchtime? Is that okay?

  “That’ll work. I’ll make us lunch.”

  “Sounds good. Goodnight, Clair. Pleasant dreams,” he said brushing his fingers over her necklace once more. Leaning in, he kissed her softly, letting his lips linger for a moment before he pulled away.

  “Goodnight, Alex.”

  When Clair closed the door to her apartment, she leaned up against it, and let out the big breath she’d been holding. She couldn’t believe how her emotions had taken hold of her. But Clair couldn’t deny the way he made her feel either. She’d only known Alex for about a week, but never felt the kind of connection she had with him. Clair touched her lips, still feeling the tingle left behind from the hunger in their kiss. It was soft, sweet, passionate, and full of longing. But the little voice in her head made her wonder if Alex was just relieving all of his pent-up emotions on her. Was she on the receiving end of a really bad breakup? Clair didn’t know. They hadn’t discussed relationships yet. She wanted to know about his past; but it wasn’t fair to ask if she wasn’t ready to share the details of her own failed affairs.

  A loud knock on the door nearly gave her a heart attack. She knew it had to be Roz since it came from the door in her hallway. Opening it, Roz stood there, smiling.

  “Hey. Did you just get home?” Clair asked. “You must have just pulled up after I came inside.”

  “Nope, I’ve been home for a few hours,” she said, grinning.

  Clair’s eyes widened, feeling her face flushed. “But… but where’s your car? We assumed you’d be at Stu’s house.”

  “He brought me home earlier. He wanted to take my car to get it serviced, put some new tires on it and stuff like that. He didn’t want anyone taking advantage of me because I’m a woman. I told him I could handle it, but rather than arguing about it, I just let him do it. But look at you,” Roz pointed at her, smiling while she looked her over. “Looks like you sure had a good time tonight.”

  Clair was speechless. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks. Had she been watching out of the window, seeing the scene unfold between them in the yard? Was she going to reprimand her for unacceptable behavior? Even if she was old enough to make her own decisions, Clair didn’t want to cause any conflicts.

  She tried to blow it off, as if their date wasn’t a big deal. “Yeah, it was all right; dinner was good.”

  “He didn’t take you to a crappy restaurant, did he?”

  Relief washed over her as she realized Roz was referring to their date. “No, it was a nice place. We had pizza. He even bought me ice cream afterwards.”

  She shook her head with approval. “What’s this?” she asked, picking up the pendant from around her neck.

  “Oh, Alex saw me looking at this tonight. He insisted on buying it, even though I told him he shouldn’t have.”

  Roz grinned, “Oh I see,” she said, dragging it out like she knew more than she was letting on.

  “And what’s that supposed to mean?” Clair asked.

  “Oh nothing, I’m just wondering when the last time Alex felt compelled to buy someone a gift.”

  “He was just being nice,” Clair huffed. “Like I told you this afternoon, it’s not a big deal. We had a good time hanging out tonight. Alex is sweet, but we’re just friends.”

  Roz laughed, “Yeah. I can clearly see that you two were just hanging out.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Waving her off, Roz said, “Oh nothing, I’ll let you get ready for bed. It’s going to take a while to get all that out.”

  Clair looked down at her pants confused. “Get what out?”

  Roz giggled. “Hon, you have grass all over you. It’s even in your hair.”

  Clair gasped, putting her hand over her mouth. It was as if she’d been caught, even though there was no rolling-around-in-the-grass-make-out session, her appearance insinuated as much.

  Roz patted her on the shoulder, smiling. “Like I told Alex earlier, I’ve been around a little while. Don’t think for a second you can fool me.” She turned and walked out the door, laughing. “See you in the morning, Clair.”

  Clair woke to the sound of someone knocking on her door. She stumbled in the dark until she found the doorknob. Opening the door, she squinted in the light to see Roz standing in front of her, already dressed, holding a coffee cup.

  “Hey, hon,” she said, extending the mug to Clair. “I know you were up late and I’m sorry I had to wake you, but I’ve got a favor to ask.”

  Taking the mug between her hands, Clair leaned against the doorframe, using it to hold her body upright. “And this favor couldn’t wait ‘til the sun came up?”

  “I know. I’m sorry. Theresa called in sick today and I remember you said you wanted any extra hours I could give you, so I was hoping you’d take h
er shift this morning.” Roz looked apologetic, “Like in thirty minutes.”

  Clair bolted upright, spilling her coffee down the side of the mug. “Thirty minutes? Seriously?” Running her fingers through her hair, she added, “Thank God I took a shower last night.”

  “I see you were able to get all that grass out. How many times did you have to wash it, anyway?” She gave Clair a wink and a sly grin.

  “Before I do you any favors, you have to promise not to bring up my appearance last night or whatever you may suspect might have happened. I already feel embarrassed enough as it is without having to hear your comments about it, too. Got it?”

  Holding her hands up in surrender, Roz laughed. “Sure, whatever you say, hon.” She backed away from the door. “I’m sorry I can’t drive you since Stu took my car last night.”

  “It’s alright, I could use the walk anyway. I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

  “Oh, one more thing,” Roz yelled from halfway down the staircase. “You’ll be waitressing today but don’t…”

  “I’m what?” Clair rushed to the staircase, “Oh no Roz, this isn’t good. I will run every customer you have away; I’m just not that coordinated.” She knew she’d make a fool out of herself in front of everyone.

  “Don’t worry about it, hon. You’ll be fine. Just take it slow and remember that, even if you do mess up, remain professional about it. Don’t take any crap from anyone. Sometimes it can get pretty hectic. You’ll do fine. Now hurry, go get ready.”

  Clair walked down the staircase in Roz’s house to let her know she was leaving. She was dreading the shift but knew she needed the hours. She couldn’t let Roz keep buying her things when she could basically afford them now. Walking through the living room, Roz sat on the couch, papers spread out on the coffee table in front of her. “Alright, I just wanted to let you know I’m heading out now.”