How Many Chances

by Beverley Hollowed

  His words cut through her like a knife. She knew he was right of course but it didn’t make it any easier to hear. She stood up and without saying a word walked to the sink and poured her coffee down the drain.

  She turned and looked at Sid.

  “I will get my things and leave,” Ally said fighting hard to stop the tears that were now dancing in her eyes. She walked to the door and stopped and turned to Sid. “I am sorry you had to lie for me. And I am sorry I am hurting everyone. That was never my intention.” Without another word she turned and headed up the stairs.

  She stood and stared at her reflection in the mirror in the bathroom. She really did look like hell. The last six day had been the toughest six days of her life.

  She looked at herself and she was almost unrecognisable. She knew she needed to make everything right. She needed to let everyone know she was okay.

  She wondered if she had the strength to face Cole again.

  She sighed and turned away from the mirror and pulled opened the bathroom door, when suddenly she heard the doorbell ring. She stood frozen to the spot as she listened to Sid make his way down the hallway and open the front door.

  Her heart stopped when she heard Coles voice.

  “Hey Sid,” Cole said and Ally could hear the heart break in his voice. Ally’s eyes filled with tears and her heart ached. “Any news?”

  “Still nothing,” Sid replied and Ally felt like a complete bitch. She knew Sid hated lying but she had left him with no other choice.

  “If you hear from her will you let me know?” Cole asked sadly. “And tell her I am so sorry and that I love her.”

  “I will of course” Sid lied and Ally felt awful. She need to stop this straight away.

  “Okay,” Cole replied. “Thanks Sid. Happy New Year.”

  “Same to you Cole” Sid replied and he stood and watched Cole walk back down the pathway and climb into his car. When he closed the door and turned to see Ally sitting at the top of the stairs he looked surprised.

  “I take it you heard who that was,” it was more of a statement than a question.

  “I heard.” Ally replied.

  “And?” Sid asked as he slowly climbed the stair to Ally.

  “I think it’s time to call Caitlin,” Ally said as she smiled nervously as Sid.

  Chapter 3

  Ally never felt more nervous than she did right in that moment. She was pacing up and down Sid’s living room. Caitlin and Hannah were due at the house any moment and Ally was terrified what her friends were going to say to her.

  When she called Caitlin a couple of hours earlier, she went postal down the phone at Ally. At first she was relieved just to talk to her friend but then she became angry with Ally for disappearing the way she did. But anger soon gave way to sympathy and that was the hardest part for Ally to deal with. She had worried so many people, she really didn’t deserve their sympathy.

  Caitlin insisted Ally needed to let her friends see she was okay and go to the New Year’s Eve party they had all been planning to go to for weeks. Ally refused point blank however it didn’t matter because Caitlin was not taking no for an answer.

  When Ally got off the phone she knew she had no choice in the matter. Hannah and Caitlin would be here for her and she was going out with them whether she wanted to or not.

  Sid agreed to go with her for some moral support and Ally felt relieved. Although Sid was less than thrilled. He knew her friends would be angry with him for not letting them know where she was.

  When she opened her case to find something to wear for the party, her heart slammed in her chest when she realised the only dress she had packed was the dress Cole had bought her. She sat down on the bed and held it in her hands. Could she wear this again? Her mind filled with all the memories of the night she last wore it and her stomach lurched. It was the night in the Four Season, the night she finally admitted to Cole and to herself that she loved him. It was the happiest night of her life.

  She wasn’t sure she could bring herself to actually wear the dress again. She lay it down on the bed and turned back to her suitcase and began to rummage for something else. But there was nothing else. The dress was the only choice she had.

  After she showered, she did her hair and her make up carefully. She wanted her friends to see she was fine, despite how devastated she was feeling inside. When her hair and makeup were done she slipped into the dress.

  She stood in front of the mirror and sighed. She couldn’t help but remember the last time she wore the dress once again. She looked as good as she had that night. But her eyes were filled with so much sadness. She was determined she was going to let everyone see she was okay. She forced a smile on her face and headed down to Sid, who was waiting for her down stairs.

  “You look beautiful Ally,” Sid said as she walked into the living room.

  “Thank you,” Ally smiled nervously at him.

  “You sure you want to do this?” Sid asked as the doorbell chimed. Ally could feel her heart hammering hard in her chest.

  “Not really,” she replied honestly. “But you know Caitlin, I am not going to win this argument. And I guess I have to face everyone sooner or later.”

  Sid gave her a sympathetic smile before he went out to answer the front door.

  Ally held her breath as she waited for her friends to walk into the living room. Caitlin was first through the living room door. Without saying a word she wrapped Ally in her arms and held her friend tightly to her.

  Then she released her and held her at arm’s length, taking in every inch of her before she spoke.

  “Don’t you ever disappear on us like that again," Caitlin said in an authoritative tone. “You had me worried sick. You had us all worried sick. Don’t you ever do this again.”

  “I promise, I won’t” Ally reassured her friend as she was wrapped tightly in her arms once again.

  Ally turned to see Hannah, who was standing awkwardly by the door.

  “Hey Hannah,” Ally said nervously. She knew her friend was upset with her. “You mad at me too?”

  “Not at all,” Hannah huffed in an exaggerated tone trying to look uninterested. “I mean why would I be mad? After all I didn’t even get a note.”

  “Hannah, I am sorry,” Ally said walking to her friend and taking her hand. “Please don’t be mad at me.”

  Hannah didn’t reply for a moment, instead she just stared at Ally. Then suddenly she threw her arms around Ally and hugged her tightly.

  “Don’t ever scare us like that again.” Hannah said when she finally released Ally from her embrace.

  “Okay,” Sid said, as he cleared his throat from the door. “When you ladies are quite finished. The taxi driver still has the meter running. So we should really hit the road.”

  The three girls and Sid all headed out into the waiting taxi and they were on their way. The whole journey to the club, Ally’s mind raced and her stomach flipped again and again. She wasn’t sure if she could do this.

  She tried hard not to let her mind go to Cole, but he was all she could think about. What if he turned up? She wasn’t sure she was ready for this. And she had the sinking feeling the closer they got to the club that this was a really bad idea.

  When they got to the club it was already heaving. Caitlin scanned the crowd and spotted Nathan in a booth at the far side of the club and she quickly led her friends through the packed club. Nathan stood up and greeted Caitlin with a kiss before he turned to Ally.

  “How are you holding up sweetheart?” he asked her as he gave her a big bear hug.

  “I’m doing okay,” she replied and smiled up at Nathan as he released her from his embrace. He was a good guy.

  She couldn’t help but quickly scan the crowd.

  “He isn’t here,” Nathan said, knowing what she was doing and Ally blushed. “He is heartbroken Ally.”

  “Please Nathan,” Ally said as her heart ached just as the thought of Cole being upset. She blinked back the tears.

  “I’
m sorry,” Nathan replied quickly when he saw the pain clearly etched across Ally’s face.

  Caitlin introduced Nathan to Sid before Nathan stopped a passing waitress and ordered a round of drinks.

  Ally slipped in to the booth, remaining at the edge of the chair and nervously picked at the beer matt on the table. She looked up and she smiled brightly and blushed a little when she realised she was being watched by the entire group.

  “Hannah, where’s Rob tonight?” Ally asked hoping to take the focus off her for two minutes.

  “We broke up,” Hannah scowled and shrugged. “He wanted me to spend tonight sitting in with his parents. I told him it was New Year’s Eve and I was going clubbing. He said he couldn’t date a party girl. Me!! A party girl!”

  Ally laughed for the first time in days. She missed her friends and was happy to be back among those she loved.

  They were almost an hour in the club and everyone was in great spirits. Even Ally was finding it easier to paint on the smile she didn’t quite feel. Sid was in the middle of telling them a story when Nathan looked up and his expression changed and he quickly shot a look in Ally’s direction and she knew instantly why. Cole was there. She could sense him there before she could even see him.

  Ally sat there in the club and her heart was racing fast. It had been six days since she seenCole. Six days since she last touched him, last smelt his glorious scent. Six days since he kissed her goodbye and she watched him walk out the door, leaving her heart shattered in pieces.

  And now there he was, standing at the far side of the club, his eyes burning into her. She could feel his eyes on her and it made her skin burst into flames.

  She looked over at Caitlin and her friend smiled at her sympathetically, then she reached out to squeeze Ally’s hand reassuringly. Ally knew coming tonight was a mistake, but just how big a mistake remained to be seen.

  Caitlin watched Cole as he walked to towards the DJ box and leaned in and whispered into the DJ’s ear before he turned and walked towards their table. She began to shift in her seat as her eyes suddenly widened and Ally knew he was coming over towards them. She could feel his closeness and her heart thumped harder and faster.

  “Ally” he silky voice said from behind her. As soon as she heard her name on his lips her eyes filled with hot salty tears. She didn’t reply. She couldn’t. He crouched down next to her and with the tips if his fingers, he softly took her by the chin and turned her face to his. The tears trickled down her face and he quickly reached up and brushed them away. “Don’t cry my gorgeous girl”.

  He slipped his arms around her and pulled her to him. Part of her wanted to pull away but she just couldn’t. Instead she allowed herself to sink into his arms. The arms she had missed so much As she pressed her face against his chest she could feel his heart beating. It was pounding just as hard as hers.

  “Dance with me” he whispered as he suddenly stood up and took her hand. “Please.”

  He led her out on to the dance floor and wrapped her in his strong arms and held her close to him, as she breathed the scent of him in. The sound of Rihanna’s, “Stay”, filled the sound system as their bodies began to move as one. Ally could feel herself weaken. He had remembered it was her favourite song. She missed him. She missed being in his arms. She missed everything about him. Being in his arms just felt like being home. And right then and there she knew there was no way she could live without him.

  They moved slowly in time to the music. Cole never took his eyes off Ally but she refused to let her eyes meet his. He softly pressed his lips to her forehead and tenderly stroked her back.

  “I have missed you so much,” he whispered but Ally didn’t reply. Instead she focus all her energy on refusing to let herself cry again. Ally closed her eyes sand pressed her cheek again his broad chest and lost herself in the music and the feeling that she was finally home where she belonged.

  Suddenly Cole began to sing softly in her ears and the word almost took her breath away. “Makes me feel like I can’t live without you, it takes me all the way, I want you to stay.”

  Ally’s heart broke. She wanted nothing more than to tell him she was going nowhere but she just couldn’t. Because she knew nothing had changed. He had still hidden the truth from her. He still had a son with someone else. And most importantly, her heart was still broken.

  She pulled away from his embrace slightly and stared up at him.

  “I can’t do this, I’m sorry,” she said as she broke free from his grasp, and quickly turned and headed back towards the table, grabbing her hand bag.

  “Ally, what’s wrong?” Caitlin asked as she was instantly on her feet. “Has he upset you again?”

  “This was a bad idea,” Ally replied, barely stopping long enough to catch a breath. “I just can’t do this.”

  Without waiting for a response she grabbed her jacket and began to push her way through the crowd. She had just reached the door when she felt a hand take hers and pull her back. She turned to find Cole looking at her, panic clearly etched across his face.

  “Please don’t walk away,” he begged her, the fear in his eyes was heartbreaking. “Please, Ally.”

  “Cole I love you, I really do,” Ally cried as he took hold of her other hand too. “But you are asking too much.”

  “But you still love me,” it was a statement more than a question. “I know you do and I love you too. That’s all that should matter. Ally, I’m begging you.”

  “Cole, I just need more time.” Ally pleaded.

  “Ally the last time I gave you time, you disappeared for six days.” Cole said sounding a little more like the Cole she knew. “I am sorry but I am not letting you walk away again. Not until we at least talked.”

  “You won’t let me?” she asked almost in disbelief.

  “No” he replied, a determined look in his eyes.

  “Cole I am not doing this.” she sighed and went to turn away. But before she could, Cole took hold of her arm and spun her back to him before he hoisted her over his shoulder in a fireman’s lift.

  “COLE!” Ally protested. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING? PUT ME DOWN.”

  “I am not letting you get away again,” he replied as he headed towards the exit.

  “Cole, everyone is looking,” she cried as she could see everyone staring at them from her upside down position.

  “I don’t care,” he laughed.

  Bastard she thought to herself. He is actually laughing

  He didn’t put her down til he reached the car and he opened the front door and dropped her into the seat before he slammed the door shut and hit the central locking so she couldn’t get back out. He was talking no chances.

  He hurried to that far side of the car and quickly climbed in behind the wheel.

  “This is kidnapping you know.” she said in a huff as he started the engine.

  “Then call the police,” he said with a laugh, as he backed the car out of the parking spot.

  Ally crossed her arms and sunk down into the seat and pouted. She couldn’t believe he had just carried her out of the club. She was so mad with him.

  “I love you Ally,” he said glancing over quickly at her and could not help but grin at the sulky expression on her face. “Even when you pout like a little kid.”

  “I do not pout!” Ally protested and much to her annoyance he laughed out loud. She could see that tired, worry look drift away from his face. She sighed once again.

  No matter what happened this evening she was going to stick to her guns. But even as she thought this, she knew in her heart she could never resist Cole bloody Thomas.

  Chapter 4

  When Cole’s car pulled to a stop outside his house, he switched off the engine and they both sat in silence for a few moments. Ally was the first to speak.

  “Why did you bring me here?” she asked staring at the house, refusing to look at Cole.

  “I just want to talk,” Cole replied turning in his seat to look at Ally before he reached over and softly brushed
her cheek. “I have missed you so much.”

  “Please don’t,” she whispered, pulling her face from his reach. She opened the car door, stepped out and walked back down the drive. Cole was out of the car and next to her in record time.

  “Where are you going?” he asked taking her by the hand to stop her from leaving. He was not going to let her get away that easy.

  “I am going home!” she snapped whirling around to face Cole and the expression of panic on his face nearly killed her. But she closed her eyes refusing to look at his said face. “You should have never brought me here.”

  “Please, Ally,” he begged and she flicked her eyes opened and let them meet his. “Please don’t do this, please don’t walk away. I can’t bear to lose you. The last six days have been hell. I just wanna talk. Please.”

  Ally closed her eyes once again and sighed. Every ounce of her being told her she should run. Run as fast as her legs could carry her. But her traitorous heart would not let her walk away. Not from him. She needed him as much as he needed her.

  “Okay,” she said in a bear whisper as she slowly opened her eyes and let them meet Cole’s. “But I am promise nothing, is that clear?”

  “Clear as crystal,” Cole nodded. Still holding Ally’s hand tightly, he walk towards the steps that lead up to his front door and pulled the keys from his pocket.

  When Ally stepped through the door, it seemed a life time ago since she last stood in the house. Everything was just the same as she remembered but yet felt so different. She nervously stood by the front door as Cole switched on the lights and removed his jacket. The comfort she once felt in this house was gone and she felt self-conscious and uncomfortable. She nervously picked at her nails and stared down at the white tiled floor.

  “Would you like something to drink?” Cole asked as he walked slowly towards Ally. She shook her head and still didn’t look at to him. “Can I take your coat?”