How Many Chances

by Beverley Hollowed

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  “I’m sorry,” Cole’s whispered voice broke into her dreams. “Can you forgive me, my gorgeous girl?”

  Ally eyes flicked open to find Cole lying next to her on the bed almost nose to nose with her.

  “Cole!” she exclaimed as relief washed through her. She threw her arms around him. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again. I was so worried.”

  “I love you,” he breathed against her mouth. Suddenly he moved above her and pinned her to the bed, his mouth claiming hers. She could feel the need in his kiss. She knew he was hurting and he was trying to deal with it the only way he knew how.

  She wanted to talk but she knew he wasn’t ready. So she returned his kiss. She wanted him to know they were still okay.

  “I need you,” he said hungrily against her mouth. “Please.”

  “I’m yours” she whispered breathlessly back to him.

  She kissed him harder, pouring every bit of hurt and pain that she had felt that day into showing him what he meant to her.

  He broke his lips from hers and stared down into her face and all Ally could see was love staring back at her.

  He reached down and, taking hold of the end of her dress he slowly slid it up her body and pulled it over her head. Never taking his eye from hers, he pulled back the straps from her bra, each one falling down on to her arms. Then he reach behind her and undid the clasp of her bra, slipping it down her arms and dropping it to the floor.

  He leaned down and gently kissed her breast, making her nipple pucker and harden beneath his gentle touch.

  Slowly he ran his tongue across her chest till he reach her other breast and he gently sucked her erect nipple into his mouth and bit it softly.

  Ally cried out as her body arched up from the bed in pure and complete pleasure. Every inch of her body giving him the answer he needed. She loved him.

  He released her nipple from his mouth and softly pressed his lips against the soft skin of her stomach. He trace light delicate kisses against her body as he worked his way further and further down until he finally reached the rim of her panties.

  He broke his mouth from her body just long enough to glance up at Ally as her heart raced faster and faster. Her body was crying out to be touched by him. She knew where this was going and she longed to feel his mouth on her once again.

  He hooked either side of her panties and eased them down her legs, then dropped them to the floor to join her bra and dress.

  He looked up at Ally once again before he pressed his mouth against her inner thigh, then he ran his tongue up the inside of her leg until he reached her soft, throbbing core. Taking her swollen and sensitive clit in his mouth he sucked and teased her with his tongue as she panted and gasped for breath.

  Ally could feel him slid his fingers deep inside her and she cried out in ecstasy.

  “Cole please,” she cried, but wasn’t sure what she was asking for. Her head was spinning as she pinched her eyes shut and allowed him to take her body on a journey. He push her on higher and higher. “Yes, baby yes.”

  She could feel her orgasm build in the pit of her stomach and slowly but surely spread out to every part of her body.

  “YES! COLE! OH GOD, YES!” she cried out as her body shook as her orgasm took hold of her. She reached down and grabbed hold of his hair as she pressed herself against his mouth harder, riding out wave after wave of her orgasm.

  When her body began to calm down she flopped back onto the bed like a wet rag, she couldn’t move a single muscle.

  She could feel the bed dip as Cole stood up, so she turned her head towards him, as her eyes flickered open.

  Her eyes finally focus on Cole as he stood there watching her.

  She watched as Cole stripped his clothes, his eyes never leaving hers. As he dropped his trouser and boxers, his rock hard length sprang free and Ally immediately felt her body respond to his. She bit down on her lips as she longed to taste him. She suddenly sat up on the bed unable to resist him any longer. Sliding from the bed to her knees on the floor in front of Cole. She took hold of his firm cock in her hands and lick across the head slowly and then down the entire length of his shaft.

  “Jesus, Ally,” he cried out as she brought her tongue back up his cock until she reached the tip once again. She flashed a look up at him through her long eyelashes before she took his throbbing cock into her mouth and slowly slid her lips down his entire shaft taking him deep in her mouth.

  Cole took hold of her head as he gently rocked in and out of her mouth. She sucked hard and she could taste little tiny droplet of salty wetness in her mouth. She knew he was close.

  Suddenly he pulled himself from her mouth and reaching down he grabbed her. With once swift movement she was back up on the bed and he was climbing on top of her and between her legs.

  He slid his cock into her slowly, knowing if he did this fast it would be over, He pulled her closer to him and claimed her mouth with his as he began to thrust into her with slow, steady movements.

  “Ally, baby,” he panted as he pushed into her deeper. “I fucking love you.”

  Ally smiled as her eyes held his, both now gasping for breath. He pushed into her again and again as Ally cried out but Cole claimed her mouth with his and her cries were lost.

  Once again her orgasm ripped through her body as Cole slammed into harder and harder until he came, pumping his hot load deep inside her before he collapsed on top of her. He buried his face in her chest and held her tightly.

  “Cole,” Ally whispered as she softly brushed his hair. He didn’t respond. Ally could feel his breathing change once again and she knew something was wrong. “Please talk to me.”

  But he didn’t say a word. She could feel his body shake and she knew he was struggling hard to keep his emotions in check.

  “Cole, baby,” she whispered softly and she drew him closer to her. “It’s okay. It’s me. Please don’t hide from me. It’s okay to let it out. Let it go.”

  Suddenly a heart breaking sob escape from deep within Cole as he buried his face into her deeper.

  “It’s okay,” she cried as the tears trickled down her face. “I have you. I love you so much.”

  They both lay wrapped in each other’s arms, both consumed with grief. Cole for the child he had just lost and Ally for the man she would have done anything for, to take his pain away.

  When they both had cried until there were no more tears. Cole wrapped Ally in his arms and held her to him so tightly.

  “Please don’t ever leave me.” He whispered sleepily. “I have lost Ben and my heart felt shattered, but if I didn’t have you too. My life would not be worth living.”

  “We are forever, Cole,” Ally sighed as her eyes grew heavier. “It’s me and you against the world.”

  They both drifted off to sleep, each lost in their own heart break. But stronger then they had ever been before.

  Chapter 21

  When Ally woke, Cole was already up and dressed. She couldn’t help but think just how sexy he looked dressed in his black suit, white shirt and black tie.

  He turned and saw her watching him and he smiled brightly.

  “Good morning, gorgeous girl,” he chirped as he straightened his tie in the mirror on the back of the wardrobe door.

  “How are you feeling this morning?” Ally asked sitting up in the bed and staring at Cole.

  “I feel great,” he said with a smile and Ally was surprised. If she hadn’t have spent the night before comforting this devastated man she might have actually believed him. But she knew he was putting up a front and she sighed. She still wanted to talk to him. She needed to know what he was thinking. But she knew his wall was up and she wasn’t sure how to get past it.

  “I have a few meetings today,” Cole said walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed next to Ally. “I know we were to stay here till the weekend. But I was thinking maybe we could go home tonight.”

  “Okay,” Ally was surprised by his r
equest. But she decided she would go alone with whatever mad him happy. “But I promised your Mom I would do lunch with her before I went back.”

  “Ring her and asked her to meet you today.” Cole suggested, and again Ally was completely taken back by his happy, upbeat mood. “I am sure she would love to come into London for the day and meet you for lunch. It might be fun.”

  “Okay, I will call her,” Ally nodded completely confused by this up beat behaviour.

  “Okay, I will get through these meetings as quickly as possible,” he leaned over and kissed Ally softly on the lips and then smiled at her. “Then we can go home and start planning our wedding.”

  Ally smiled but she was thrown by Cole’s behaviour. It almost seemed like yesterday hadn’t happened.

  He stood up and walked to the door.

  “Cole,” Ally said nervously, unable to say nothing any longer. “What about Steph and Ben?”

  “What about them?” Cole said, stopping at the door and turning back to Ally, the look on his face completely unreadable.

  “Well,” Ally swallowed and half regretting bringing them up but she had now so she continued. “What will happen to them now?”

  “I have no idea,” Cole replied with a shrug. Though he was looking at Ally, he was miles away in his head. “She has been given two weeks to get out of the house and the bank accounts have been closed.”

  “But she will have nothing.” Ally said surprising herself.

  “And that’s my problem how?” he asked in a callous tone Ally had never heard from Cole before.

  “Well it’s not,” Ally said, her voice suddenly becoming smaller. “But what about Ben?”

  “What about him?” Cole sighed sounding a little impatient with Ally. He pinched the bridge of his nose to relieve the tension that was building up in his head. “He is not my responsibility. He isn’t mine so why should I care about him.”

  “But Cole, you loved him.” Ally said completely shocked by what Cole had just said.

  “Yes,” he replied and looked directly at Ally. “And look where that got me. Everyone said I needed to not get attached. To have a DNA test, even you. But I thought I knew better. And now I look like a complete fool.”

  “You were just taken in by that bitch,” Ally said getting up out of the bed and walking towards Cole. She took his face in her hands. “The only thing you are guilty of is having a good heart and being a good man. You fell in love with that little boy. You shouldn’t beat yourself up over this.”

  “Well it won’t happen again,” Cole said looking Ally straight in the eye, a strange expression on his face.

  “Well of course it will never happen again,” Ally smiled and kissed him tenderly. “You have me now and I would never lie to you like she did.”

  “No,” Cole replied taking hold of Ally’s hands and taking them from his face. “I mean I will never fall in love with a baby again. Because there will be no more babies.”

  Ally looked at Cole in confusion. She knew he was upset but he words completely stunned her.

  “I never wanted a family Ally,” Cole explained. “Children complicate things. Besides I have a demanding job. I travel a lot. It will be hard enough to leave you when I go away on business. But to leave you with a child. What sort of a father would that make me?”

  Ally was speechless. She had no idea where this had come from. She had never really thought about a family before but now it was taken off the table. Was it something she was prepared to give up? She wasn’t really sure how she felt.

  “Look I am going to be late,” Cole sighed as he looked at his watch. “Call Mom and see if she is free. I am sure she would love to go to lunch with you. I will be back by six at the latest. I will arrange the flight for about eight o’clock and we can go home to Dublin.”

  He kissed Ally on the lips and turned and walked out of the bedroom leaving her standing in the middle of the room in complete and utter shock.

  Ally turned and headed to the bathroom and turned on the taps in the shower. Then she turned and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She barely recognised herself. She was pale and thinner. Her eyes were puffy and rimmed with red from all the crying she had done in the past few days.

  Suddenly the room felt like it was spinning and she gripped the sink to steady herself. She pinched her eyes shut and took deep, slow, steadying breaths.

  Ally knew she need to learn to keep calm and not get so upset. Ally was always the same when something bothered her. Even as a child when she was stressed out or anxious she would vomit.

  But she had never reacted as badly as she had to all the upset she had been through the last couple of weeks. But then she had been through quite a lot.

  When the feeling of nausea and dizziness past she turned and stepped into the shower. She felt lifeless and hollow. She replayed the conversation she just had with Cole in her head over and over again.

  She stood beneath the water and she thought about his words. Could she give up a life with kids for a life time with Cole Thomas? The truth was she couldn’t imagine living with anyone else. He was her other half. He completed her.

  By the time she climbed out of the shower she felt so confused. She loved Cole, there was no question of that. But he had just unilaterally made the biggest decision of both their lives, and Ally was angry.

  When she dried herself she stood in the wardrobe staring at her clothes blankly in her bra and panties lost in a world of her own.

  Suddenly her phone started ringing from the bedroom and she rushed out to answer it before it rang off.

  “Hello.” Ally answered as she flopped onto the bed.

  “Hi, Ally.” The voice at the far end of the line chirped. Ally instantly recognised the voice of Cole’s mom, Ella. “Cole called me and said you were hoping to meet up for lunch today. I am actually heading into London this morning on some errands. I would love to meet you at, say twelve thirty.”

  “That sounds perfect.” Ally replied and despite her down beat mood, she couldn’t help but smile at the idea of lunch with this lovely lady. “Where would you like to meet?”

  “How about I stop by and collect you,” she suggested. “Then we can decide where to go from there.”

  “Perfect,” Ally replied happily.

  “I will see you at twelve thirty,” Ella said happily before she hung up. Ally stood up and walked back into the wardrobe with a little more purpose.

  At exactly twelve thirty reception called up to say Ella was there and waiting in the car. Ally grabbed her bag and, waving goodbye to Annette, she made her way down to the reception and out into the waiting car.

  “Lovely to see you again, Ally,” Ella exclaimed as Ally slipped into the back seat next to her. “How have you been?”

  “I’m good,” Ally replied with a smile but the look on Ella’s face made Ally’s smile fade a little.

  “What’s happened?” Ella asked immediately sensing something was very wrong. To Ally’s horror tears filled her eyes but she quickly blinked them back. But it was too late, she had seen them and reached out and took Ally’s hand. “It’s okay, you can talk to me and tell me how I can help. I know exactly where to go for lunch. And you can tell me everything.”

  Ally smiled and instantly felt better. She really liked this lovely woman. She thought of her own mother and wondered if she had have been still alive, would she have had the relationship with her she believed she would have with Ella. Her Mom was her Mom. She there were times Ally felt like she was in her way too. Now at least, she knew why. She knew Cole’s mom was different. She was special.

  Ella brought Ally to a small little Irish pub and Ally was surprised that the lady behind the bar knew Ella. The two ladies greeted each other very warmly and Ella introduce Ally as her future daughter-in-law. Then she explained the woman, whose name was Eve, was one of her best friends and was once Ella’s roommate when they were both young, free and single when Eve was fresh off the boat from Ireland.

  Eve showed them to
a private little alcove at the back of the pub and gave them both a menu and left to get them both a drink.

  “So tell me,” Ella said once they were both alone.

  “I really don’t know where to start,” Ally replied not knowing what she should or shouldn’t tell her, after all she was Cole’s mom. How could she betray Cole by turning to her about their problems?

  “How about at the beginning,” Ella replied, reaching over and talking Ally’s hand. And before Ally knew it she began to talk and told Ella everything.

  “Oh sweetheart,” she exclaimed when Ally was finished telling her, her story. “No wonder you are so upset.”

  “Ella I don’t know what to do,” Ally replied honestly. “I love Cole so much, but he is shutting me out. He has made this huge decision for us both and it’s like I have no say. I love him so much and I can’t imagine spending my life without him. But I don’t know if children are something I want to give up.”

  “Ally,” Ella said taking her hand. “Cole is hurt. He feels embarrassed and angry, probably with himself as much and that god awful Stephanie girl. He doesn’t know how to deal with his feelings so he has put his barriers up. But he loves you Ally. I could see that in his face when he came home before Christmas and told us he met the woman he was going to marry. Please, just give him some time.”

  “I will give him all the time he needs,” Ally said with a smile. And she meant it. “Ella, I love Cole. I will give him whatever he needs.”

  When they had finished their lunch, Ella dropped Ally back to Cole’s apartment.

  “Please keep in touch,” she said as she hugged Ally tightly. “And remember I am only ever a phone call away if you ever want to talk. And anything we discuss will always be between us. I promise you that.”

  “Thank you Ella,” Ally replied with a grateful smile. “I promise I will make sure Cole visit’s more often.”

  “I know you will,” Ella laughed. “I am so glad he has you. I don’t have to worry about him anymore. I know he is in good hands.”