On Frozen Hills

by KJ Swann

  “Now if at any time, you feel uncomfortable or if the stones are too hot, please let me know.”

  Ivy nodded.

  Bobbie poured some massage oil into her hands and massaged Ivy’s back.

  Ivy was enjoying every minute of the treatment and was glad she hadn’t canceled like she’d been thinking of doing. Ivy closed her eyes, thinking more about why she wanted to switch jobs. She remembered when she was in school and how she used to help tutor kids who needed help in Math or English, and had enjoyed doing it.

  “Girl, you sure are tense up here in your shoulders,” remarked Bobbie. “I need you to flip over onto your back now. Then if you want, you can close your eyes again. The same rules apply with the stones, or if you feel uncomfortable.”

  Ivy turned over, holding on to the sheet while doing so. It wasn’t exactly the easiest thing to do, but she managed without the sheet falling onto the floor.

  “The tension doesn’t surprise me one bit. So much stuff going on and trying to decide what’s right and what’s not,” Ivy replied.

  “I hear ya there. Go with your instincts. They never lead you astray.”

  “So people say, but sometimes I feel they’re not always helpful or lead me in the wrong direction.”

  “Yeah, but that’s when you need to learn to trust yourself. If you can’t trust yourself, who can you trust?”

  “I’m usually pretty good at listening to myself, but lately not so much.”

  “Close your eyes and relax and look within yourself. Let yourself be taken wherever your mind and heart go. Take this time to reflect on everything in your life. Make your life what you want it to be, not what others see it,” Bobbi advised.

  “Hmm. That’s kind of what’s going on. My dad still wants to control my life even though I’m no longer at home.”

  “Ah that somewhat explains the tension in your neck and shoulder areas. Relax and close your eyes. Reflection helps, and you might see things differently. I’ll let you know if you need to move or anything.”

  Ivy smiled as she closed her eyes. She felt comfortable with this therapist. Ivy knew what Bobbie was saying was right. She needed to take charge of her own life. Lying there with her eyes closed, she thought about what she truly wanted to do if she went back to school. When she’d told Jace she wanted to be a teacher, she was being honest with both herself and him. Now she just had to figure out for sure if it was elementary or secondary she wanted to teach.

  Ivy pondered all the reasons why she wasn’t happy at her job. Watching the markets each day on her computer or even being yelled at on the phone when things didn’t go right had become a struggle. She liked helping people like she had when she was in high school. Ivy wanted to see the look of wonder when someone finally caught on to something they didn’t understand before.

  There was a nudge on Ivy’s left shoulder. Ivy slowly opened her eyes, and even though the lights were dimmed, her eyes squinted like the lights were on full blast.

  “How long was I out?”

  “Not long. Maybe twenty minutes. But I think you were relaxed enough to focus on yourself. That’s why you fell asleep so easily.”

  Ivy nodded. She felt a bit freer than she had before, as well as less stressed. She took a deep breath and let it out. The tension melted away. Ivy felt good, understanding that during her brief sleep she had decided she was going back to college for teaching. She knew her father wouldn’t be happy, but she didn’t care if he was or not.

  “I’ll leave you to get back into the garments the spa gave you. If you could fill out the comment card sitting on the clipboard, I’d much appreciate it.”

  “Not a problem. I’d be glad to.”

  Bobbie left the room, and Ivy hopped off the table to get dressed. Out in the hallway stood Bobbie. “I hope you have a good day.”

  “Same to you and thank you so much for everything.”

  Bobbie nodded, and Ivy went toward the pool area and the lockers to pick up her clothes. Once she was changed, she walked slowly back through the hotel, noticing it was raining even though it was December. That can’t be good. The rain would turn into ice overnight, but she was glad they weren’t going anywhere yet. Ivy started for the elevator. Ascending, watching herself in its shiny metal mirrored walls, she finally felt she was on the right path in her life. She needed to get into gear and start looking up colleges and working on her financial information before the first of the year.

  The suite was silent. Jace wasn’t there. Ivy texted him.

  Where are you?

  Just walking around. I needed to get out. Thinking about Sawyer.

  Closing her eyes, Ivy felt bad. Sorry I left you.

  Don’t. I have to learn how to deal with this, babe. When we get back home, I’m going to start seeing someone. It’s time.

  Tears streamed down Ivy’s face. She was proud of Jace for finally recognizing he needed help. Okay, baby. You know I’m here for you if you need me.

  I know. I’ll be back in a bit. Can’t wait to hear about your massage.

  Ivy set her cell back down on the table, then sat on the couch, turned on the TV, and flipped through the channels. Pleasantville was just starting to come on, so she got comfortable. At some point during her movie, Ivy must’ve fallen asleep. When she woke up, it was near the end and Jace still wasn’t back to the room. Just as she was reaching over to turn on the lamp next to the couch, a key card was inserted into the door. Jace. The gleam in Jace’s eyes told her all she needed. She walked to him, wrapping her arms around him.

  Jace squeezed her in return. “Thanks, babe, I needed that.”

  “Do you want to talk?”

  Shaking his head, Jace replied, “No, not really, but I know I need to. Right now, I just want to hold you. I’ve done a lot of thinking. That’s why it took me a lot longer to come back. I figured if you are going to make changes in your life, I need to as well. I don’t want Sawyer’s death hanging over me anymore.”

  Ivy ran her fingers through the back of Jace’s hair. “You’re making the right choice. This has been eating you up for years. You’ve been hiding it and making everyone think you’re fine, but deep down you’re not. Just be aware I support you. I’ll be with you through every step if you want me to be.”

  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  Ivy grabbed Jace’s hand and led him to the couch.

  “Now I understand you don’t want to talk about any of what you are going through, but we need to, Jace.”

  “We are supposed to be here to relax, not to go over my issues.”

  “It doesn’t matter why we’re here. We’re here together. You have an issue that needs to be dealt with, and it’s better to talk about it here than back at the cabin right now.”

  “I don’t even know where to start.”

  “The beginning is usually the best place.”

  Jace groaned. “You’re aware I’ve had trouble dealing with Sawyer’s death. He was my best friend, always there when I needed him. Until the day I lost him. Ah, you found your movie.”

  “You’re not going to change the subject.”

  “I realize now we got started on it it’s harder than I thought it would be.”

  “I’m not going to judge you on anything. Don’t feel like you have to hide anything from me or feel you have to deal with this all to yourself.”

  Jace sighed. “I’m not hiding anything. I’m not one for talking about problems. You know this.”

  “What happened to Sawyer is starting to affect us a little bit. I’m worried about you when you’re at work and if you’re totally with it when you need to be. You need help. I’m glad you’re going to get the help you need.”

  “There is something else bothers me.”

  “What is it?” Ivy asked.

  “A lot of it has to do with what your dad said. You think it doesn’t, but it does. He’s right on a lot of it. I worry that I’m going to leave you behind. After seeing what happened to Sawyer and how he left his fiancé
e, I fear that one day that will be me. Didn’t you ever wonder why I was so adamant about putting money away in case something happened?”

  “No, I never thought about it other than the fact we’re putting money aside.” Ivy shook her head.

  Jace closed his eyes, then rubbed his face. “I didn’t want to leave you with nothing should something happen to me while I was on the job. I wanted to support you.”

  “Babe, you do support me, plus you know I earn well, and I’ve been helping put money aside as well. Losing you scares the shit out of me. But I would never back away from helping you deal with your issues.” Ivy placed her hands on Jace’s face.

  “Deep down I realize that, but in my head, I worry that when things get bad, you’re going to run the first chance you get.”

  Ivy held up a hand. “Don’t think that. You’re stuck with me, babe.”

  Tears welled up in Jace’s eyes. The emotion of everything he’s been holding in finally starting to release? Ivy cocked her head to the side and caressed Jace’s face. “Things will be all right. Please believe me.”

  “I do. It hurts to talk about all this.”

  “When we get back home, you will talk to your captain. Got it?”

  “I will, I promise.”

  Ivy nodded, feeling he would keep his word. Jace pulled her toward him.

  “I see you were watching your movie.”

  “Yep. But I slept through most of it until I heard you come in. But there’s another rerun on in a bit.”

  “Let me guess—you’re going to make me sit through it for like the millionth time.”

  Ivy smiled. “Of course.”

  “Hey, tell me how your massage went.”

  “Oh, Jace. It was wonderful. My massage therapist did such a wonderful job. She had me close my eyes and reflect on what I wanted, not what others wanted for me. I’ve concluded I do want to teach, but I want to get on the internet to check out the different schools and see what I feel would be the best fit for me.”

  “Have you figured out for sure what level yet?”

  “Still tossing up between elementary and secondary.”

  Ivy reached for her phone and started searching online at the university she had attended to see if they even had a teaching program. She was disappointed to find out there wasn’t one. Frowning, she typed in teaching universities in New York.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I was hoping to get into the university I went to before, but I wasn’t thinking. It was mainly a business university, so I need to start searching.” The first school that caught her eye was NYU. Ivy started jumping for joy.

  “Jace, NYU. Well NYU-Steinhardt. That’s the education department. I was accepted into NYU before. I’d have to check to see if I could still get in.”

  “You haven’t been out of school that long, so I don’t think you’d have to do much, but when we get back to Shaftsbury, start calling and talking with admissions. The worst they can say is you have to take those nasty ACTs all over again.”

  Ivy made a face, thinking about the tests. Even though she’d done fairly well on them, she’d hated taking them. She bookmarked the school on her phone’s browser to show her mom once they were back at the cabin. Ivy felt better about having a college as a prospect. It was a good place to start, and if she couldn’t go there, she would continue her search.

  Ivy put her phone down and nestled into Jace. “Ready to watch Pleasantville?”

  “If I really have to. It’s not like you don’t know that movie forward, backward, sideways…”

  Ivy elbowed him in the side. “That’s enough out of you. You like it just as much as I do.”

  “Uh-huh, if you say so.”

  Ivy sat up, glared at Jace, and crawled into his lap. “Excuse me, Mr. Tysen? What did you just say?”

  “If you say so,” Jace repeated clearly trying to maintain a straight face. “Oh, that’s not fair.” Ivy had reached down and tickled Jace’s sides.

  “You like this movie just as much as I do.”

  “Yes, okay, okay, I know I do. Had to give you some shit.”

  Ivy kissed Jace on the lips before hopping off and settling back in her spot.

  “Hey, I’m hungry.”

  “What? The movie is starting and now you decide you’re hungry?”

  “We can do room service. That way we don’t have to leave.”

  “Fine. You know what I like. Tomorrow we’ll do more exploring.”

  “That’s fine. Tomorrow is our last full day here, so we can do whatever,” replied Jace, standing.

  “Thanks for reminding me. I’m enjoying the time away.”

  “If we could get away with it, we could always head home.”

  “Yeah, sure. Do you think my mom would let us do that? Or, for that matter, Tessa?”

  The expression on Jace’s face said it all. He knew better than to cross Vivian or Tessa. “You’re right. Your mother would have my hide if we didn’t show up in Albany.”

  “That she sure would. She’s looking forward to this New Year’s Eve gala with all of us dressed up. Now me, on the other hand, I’d rather be at home cuddled on the couch watching Dick Clark’s Rocking Eve. Tessa can’t wait for this now she has Derrick to go with her, and I don’t want to let her down.”

  Jace nodded, picked up the receiver and called for room service. “The food will be here in fifteen to thirty minutes,” he announced, hanging up.

  They both settled back in their respective places and watched the movie. Ivy was so engrossed in it, she barely heard the knock at the door; all she noticed was Jace getting out of his chair and answering it. A few minutes later, Jace was placing the food on the coffee table in front of the couch and sitting beside Ivy.

  “Dig in. I ordered a bunch of different things. I didn’t know what you wanted, and I didn’t know what I wanted. So I just ordered.”

  Ivy gazed at the food spread before her. “Are we going to be able to eat all this?”

  “Well, you know how much food I can put away.”

  “Yeah, you’re a bottomless pit, yet you don’t gain an ounce.”

  Jace grinned. “Yep.”

  “You’re an ass.”

  “But you love me.”

  “You sure about that?” quipped Ivy.

  A couple of hours later, Ivy stretched and saw most of the food was gone. She glanced over at Jace sound asleep next to her on the couch. She didn’t remember eating all the food, but she was sure she’d had help. After placing the empty plates back on the delivery tray, Ivy moved it closer to the door. She nudged Jace awake. At first he swung his arms around as if he was swatting at a fly. Ivy nudged him again. This time he swung his arms a little harder and fell out of the recliner.

  “What the fuck?”

  Ivy grabbed her sides, she was laughing so hard.

  “What’s so damn funny?”

  Ivy recounted what had happened, and Jace glared at her. “I don’t think that’s funny one bit.”

  Ivy still had hold of her sides as she replied, “It’s not like you’ve never done shit like that to me before.”

  “Whatever.”

  Ivy stuck her tongue out at Jace, and then she saw the playful look in his eyes. She took off running toward the bedroom, and he followed her at a quick clip. After jumping on the bed, Ivy scooted as close to the headboard as she could.

  “You think that headboard is going to protect you?”

  “No, I know it won’t. I’m deciding my best course of action.”

  “You’ve never won this game. What makes you think you can now?” Jace queried.

  “There’s always a first time for everything, isn’t there?”

  “Ah, a challenge. I’m up for a challenge.”

  As Jace slowly made his way up on the bed, Ivy countered his movements. It was a game of cat and mouse. Just as Jace was lunging for Ivy, she jumped off the bed and landed on the floor. Jace about landed head-first on the floor in the process.

  Ivy kneeled in f
ront of him. “Are you okay?”

  Jace grabbed the back of Ivy’s neck and pulled her forward till their foreheads were touching. Ivy rubbed his cheek.

  “So what are we going to do tomorrow?”

  “Not sure. We could go swimming in the pool, take in a show? Up to you, babe.”

  Ivy sighed. The time here away from all the chaos back at the family cabin was what she’d needed. She was looking forward to picking out her dress with her mom and sister, but not being near her father. She didn’t realize how much in her thoughts she was until Jace was waving a hand in front of her face.

  “Hey, you still with me?”

  “Yeah, just doing some thinking.”

  “Everything okay?”

  “I think it will be. I just have to get over the next hurdle.”

  Jace raised an eyebrow at her, clearly not having a clue what she was talking about. Ivy didn’t say anything further to clue him in either. He would understand soon enough. But for now, she needed to make plans for her future with Jace by her side. Whether her family approved or not was irrelevant.

  9

  The following morning, Jace and Ivy made it down to the restaurant to have breakfast. Ivy stared at the menu for what seemed like hours. There were so many choices she was having a hard time deciding.

  “Have you made any decision?” Jace grumbled after fifteen minutes.

  Ivy shook her head. She knew the waitress had been by their table refilled Jace’s coffee cup twice already.

  Jace motioned for the waitress and turned to Ivy. “Well, I’m ordering, because I’m starving.”

  “You’re not starving. You’re hungry.”

  “Tell that to my stomach,” Jace said as it let out a loud rumble.

  “Okay, okay. I’ve decided. Don’t want you wasting away over there. That wouldn’t be a good look in a tux.”

  “To answer your question, I was thinking about just walking around and seeing what’s here. You never did get to the sports place, and we can check out what shows, if any, that are playing tonight pique our interests. Then I do want to swim in that awesome pool of theirs.”

  Jace smiled. “Whatever you want to do, we’ll do.”