The Virgin Widow

by Lillith Payne

  Finally, when the door shut, she forced herself from under the covers, letting her body stretch to its full length. Zane stood across the room eyeing her, watching as her breasts rose with the movement and fell only slightly. Approaching her with a cup, he cautioned her about the temperature of the tea. “Thank you,” she whispered, using both hands to bring the liquid to her lips, her eyes closing as she tasted the brew. “This is wonderful,” she told him.

  "Better than mead?” he joked.

  "Nothing would be better than mead,” she teased.

  "Come, have a hot soak; I'm afraid we have guests who will expect us to have breakfast with them."

  She groaned at his words, but knew they were true and finally threw back the sheet and slipped to her feet. A pillow dropped to the floor and as she reached to toss it back she froze, the color draining from her face.

  "What's wrong?” Zane saw her expression and moved closer. He realized the red-stained sheet would send currents of gossip through the household and decided not to make it an issue. With little thought, he handed her his half full cup of black tea and stripped the linen from the bed, bundling it up over and over on itself until it was much smaller and compact. Serena could only stand naked beside him and watch. With assured moves, he dropped several small logs on the embers and managed to bring the fire back to life. With little ceremony, he dropped the sheet onto the flames and they both stared at the cloth burning away her secret.

  She had no words. She moved beside him, handed him his cup and whispered a thank you. His arm reached around her shoulder, felt her chill and he ordered her into the hot water. It took no further persuasion to get her in the tub and she watched with distracted awe as he finished stripping all the layers of the bedding, tossing them in the corner, leaving the bed naked. “Won't someone realize there's a sheet missing?” Her question bothered him and he knew she was embarrassed on many levels.

  "I don't keep track of the linens; we'll assume they were just lost or misplaced during the full house. So many people, so many beds...” He lifted his right eyebrow as if to say it was a reasonable answer. “Besides, I doubt DeVore or Hilda would question either of us about it. We are, remember, the Duke and Duchess of Trahorn.” He used the poker to make sure all the cloth had burned away before turning back. “Serena, later we'll talk. About my accident and about how you managed to be wed three previous times and remain a virgin."

  "Alright, Zane, it sounds fair. But you will keep my secret? It would only harm Orson, and he always treated me with kindness and respect. I'd hate to have his reputation spoiled."

  "Between us only, Serena.” She was genuinely relieved and finished bathing quickly. As she drew a bath sheet around her, there was another knock at their door. Both laughed at the many interruptions when Hilda whispered she'd brought clean clothes for the duchess.

  Dried and dressed, Serena asked her husband if he minded her non-traditional hairstyle. He told her he didn't care; he thought she was beautiful as she was and he watched her blush.

  Her dress was a sturdy dark blue wool, a long skirt with a short overshirt. There was little adornment, yet she managed to look regal. While she was a bit out of style, it suited her. He dressed quickly and Serena helped tie his sling into place.

  Zane asked Serena if Hilda should move her things to his chamber while they ate. After watching him for several seconds she voiced her thoughts.

  "Were you planning on sharing your chamber with me?” He was startled and she listened intently. How he answered would define a portion of their lives together.

  "No. I hadn't thought about it. I had assumed you'd want your own space, not knowing me and especially with my limitations."

  "What limitations, Zane? So far, other than your vision, I've felt there was nothing lacking with your physical abilities.” Her face flushed and he smiled.

  "Thank you, wife, I appreciate the confidence boost. But now that we've begun to have an understanding between us, do you really want Hilda choosing your gown each morning and bringing it to you?"

  "No, I suppose that wouldn't do.” She glanced at the connecting door to the chamber that was rightly hers and thought about the countess. Zane followed her line of vision and told her he could easily have Fiona moved during the day. He didn't expect her to give it such deep thought and was obviously surprised by her answer.

  "Let's just leave things as they are for now, milord. To move her out in the middle of her stay would only make her temper worse. I doubt she'll stay long now that she knows you've bedded me. Her pride will make it hard to witness our happiness.” She hesitated, but then continued, reminding him about their declarations of truthful discourse. “I feel she'll leave, but also know deep inside she'll return unannounced, once she has had time to decide how to change the situation between us. Once she is gone, I'll take possession of my rightful chamber. She'll be assigned to the south tower for her next visit. And if she doesn't like it, she can come and confront me."

  "Later, I'll introduce you to the servants and give you a tour of the castle."

  "Actually, if you don't mind, I'd prefer Hilda and DeVore to show me the castle. They'll have a different perspective on things.” Serena realized how her words sounded and added quickly, “Not that I wouldn't love your tour, but I feel, as the duchess, some things should be left to convention, at least to begin with. I would however, if it's not too much trouble, ask you to show me around the keep later this afternoon and especially your stables."

  "Alright, Serena, no affront taken. Let DeVore and Hilda show you the running of the castle. This afternoon we'll head to the stables."

  "Thank you, Zane, for understanding. As your wife, I must position myself from the start or lose respect. And I'm quite sure with Fiona close by and having past relationships with most of the servants, she'll try and do harm to my reputation and undermine my authority. I can't let that happen if I'm to make you a happy home, sir."

  "All right Serena, you take your tour and later we'll slip away to the stables.” This time his right eye winked at her and she blushed openly.

  "Of course, my lord, what ever you wish.” She bowed her head slightly but was holding back a bit of a laugh.

  "Come along Serena, we have guests and no choice but to join them."

  "How long will they stay?” He took her hand on his arm as they walked the corridor towards the stairway.

  "Probably a few more days, unless the weather worsens."

  "Then I shall pray for sunshine and dry roads."

  "Yes, you do that.” Surprising her, he brought her hand to his lips and lightly caressed it, sending a chill through her that transferred to him. “First, we have to get through breakfast and past Fiona's temper."

  "Why should she have a temper? Wasn't she the one who facilitated the idea of your taking a wife?"

  "Yes, but I don't think she assumed we'd find a level of closeness as we have."

  "Then her plan was not thought out well in advance. One must always try to think of all the alternatives before charging headlong into a situation."

  "You are a most strange woman, Serena. I shall look forward to our future with renewed interest, for I feel you will keep us all on our toes."

  "Only when necessary, sir."

  Zane couldn't remember when he'd laughed so often or openly, even before the accident. Now, her strange sense of humor and hubris excited him. It had been a long time since anyone had challenged him.

  Standing at the doorway to the dining hall, he paused and smiled at her. “You're uncomfortable, aren't you? I saw how you took the stairs one at a time.” While she felt her face heat, she wouldn't give an inch.

  "Yes, my lord, but it's an oddly satisfying kind of sore.” He laughed openly and heartily at her remark, drawing attention to themselves. Their guests had no idea what they spoke of, only witnessed her blush and their hushed words, along with the duke's laugh.

  Fiona was a no-show for the meal and it was actually quite pleasant. Serena easily discussed the castle and
asked questions about the area she'd never been to before. Trying to be a good hostess, she managed to speak with each person, developing a bond with her guests. When the meal was finished, she excused herself while Zane and the other men went to his study. The ladies moved to the solar with the promise of a tea tray and samplers to be worked on.

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  Chapter Seven

  Her tour with DeVore was of the main rooms of the castle. They avoided the rooms their guests inhabited, deciding to tour them when the castle was quiet. Hilda took her to the kitchens and work rooms, nodding approvingly as Serena had a smile and kind word for everyone she met. By the time Hilda offered to show her the linen storage she was tired and hungry, her stomach rumbling loudly as they walked down the long corridor.

  "Why not join the ladies in the solar; I'll have a fresh tea tray sent up."

  "Thank you for understanding, Hilda. There's so much I have to learn, yet fear I insult our guests by leaving them alone."

  "They understand, Duchess.” The two women watched each other openly before Hilda added, “Well, most of them."

  "Yes, I'm sure the countess would prefer I combust into flames before her eyes!” Serena let the words slip out and was instantly sorry. Speaking in such a manor to the staff was unheard of, especially on her second day. Only to her surprise, Hilda smiled and nodded.

  "You'd be smart to watch your back for a while; that one can be cruel at times."

  "Thank you, Hilda, I'll remember that."

  With a slight curtsey, Hilda left Serena several paces from the solar entrance. With a deep breath, she readied herself to confront Fiona, strongly relieved on discovering she was absent from the room. She made no mention of the missing guest, but poured fresh tea and started a discussion of fashion trends, adding she was obviously behind the times. Endearing her with the rest of the women, soon they were smiling and laughing, seeming to enjoy their time together.

  Later in the afternoon when the rain finally slowed, DeVore found Serena and told her the duke was heading to the stables, if she felt so inclined to join him. Excusing herself from the ladies’ company, she held back, running to her chamber to change into warmer clothes and leather boots. Zane was waiting at the bottom of the staircase for her, a heavy woolen cape wrapped around his shoulders.

  "Will you be warm enough?” he asked, watching her slowly descend towards him.

  "I believe so."

  When she reached the last step, he reached for her gloved hand, tucking it on his arm and holding her close to his body. “For warmth,” he'd said but she didn't care; only that she was close once again.

  The journey was breathtaking to Serena. She'd arrived well into the afternoon and with the heavy rain hadn't seen much of her surroundings. Now, with just a light drizzle, she saw her new home for the first time. She asked Zane numerous questions about it: how he ran it, what he planted and when they finally reached the stable, she went on non-stop about his horses.

  He seemed delighted but hardly got a word in to answer her. As soon as they entered the stables, she dropped her heavy cape on a nearby bale of hay and started wandering down the center isle. Several of the stable boys came to stand at attention and Zane hung back, resting his hip on the same hay bale, watching her interact with the staff and the horses. Drawing a deep breath she smiled at each, inquiring their name and job, commenting on each.

  For the first time in years, Zane felt a strange tingle in his fingers. It felt as if they had been asleep for years and were suddenly waking, the ache not horrible, but new. He said nothing to Serena, but wondered how it happened. Zane was too afraid to hope he might get feeling back to the useless limb and tamped down his hope once again. Watching Serena, a strange sense of pride washed over him. She was trying to insinuate herself into the household, to find her position within it.

  As the boys disappeared to the recesses, she started at one end of the isle and stopped at each stall, reaching to pet the horse and whispering kind words to it. Zane joined her, having retrieved several apples from the corner barrel. He started slicing them as they walked, handing a bit to Serena to feed each animal. She was more familiar with horses than he would have guessed from her conversations last evening and he asked about her riding habits.

  "I learned as a child and always rode out with Father when he checked the fields. As long as I wasn't underfoot, Lily didn't care unless I came into the house with mud and muck on me. Orson was an accomplished rider, and so was Ulrich. We rode almost daily."

  "Serena,” the duke said, scanning the stables to make sure they couldn't be heard before continuing. “Yesterday you mentioned horses that your brother took. What did you mean?"

  "Half-brother,” she clarified, the disgust evident in her voice. “He confiscated the three horses Orson gifted me upon our divorce, as well as the land, the home and the pension I was to live on."

  "How could he do that? If Lord Tamson had made provisions..."

  "Have you ever met William?"

  "No, only heard of him through Derek and Fiona."

  "Yes, the three of them make a fine group and I've yet to meet Derek.” She blushed at her words and quickly apologized.

  "Don't,” he said, raising his right hand to her cheek. “You've gotten a clear picture of him. He's not my favorite person. In actuality, I have felt many times he's waiting for me to die so he can take control."

  "Ah, that explains how I was chosen than. With my history, they probably hoped I bring an end to your life and he and Fiona would rule Trahorn castle with Derek and all its wealth.” She hesitated only a moment before adding, “Were you aware of their relationship in the past?"

  Zane tried to keep himself in check, bile rising in his throat as Serena innocently said her words. “No,” he grunted and turned quickly from her, striding out the stable by the door at the far end.

  She all but ran to catch him. When she reached the doorway, she saw him take an already saddled horse from a groom and mount quickly, steering the animal towards an open field. She paused for only a moment before calling to the grooms and asking for a saddled horse to be brought quickly. After a bit of hesitation the two stood and quickly saddled a brown horse for her, hoping their choice had been proper. They'd saddled a fair-tempered horse, having no knowledge of her riding expertise.

  * * * *

  Zane was beyond angry. At Fiona and Derek, at himself and a bit at Serena for seeing the situation he never allowed himself to confront. In his haste and anger, he didn't hear her calls, and only realized she was approaching when he stopped at the far stream to water his horse. Turning to watch her, he saw that she was hunched down low over the neck of Sadie, one of his most gentle and slow horses.

  While he wanted to be mad, he found himself starting to smile. He realized her frustration at the animal's gentle gait—the mare wouldn't be rushed. By the time she reached him, she appeared much as she had last night at their first meeting. Wet with her hair flying behind her, mud kicked up along her skirt hem. He saw she rode straddling the horse as a man would, not sidesaddle as a woman should. The whole picture of her coming towards him had his cock filling, knowing he'd already made her sore; this would only make it worse for her. Yet the idea of taking his new wife on the ground in the misting rain appealed.

  Instead of apologizing for her rash words, she dropped to the ground, uttering curse words at the grooms who had given her a child's horse.

  His anger fled as he listened to her mumbling as she approached. Somehow, by the time she reached him, he was all but laughing. That only made her ire worse.

  "Don't laugh at me, Zane!"

  "My dear wife, I am laughing at the entire situation.” As he said the words he realized it was true. “Come, give me Sadie's reins,” he continued, reaching to take the horse to water. Once they were dropped over a nearby low-hanging branch he turned towards her.

  What a sight! Her hair was a mass of damp curls and her face was flushed red from the cold. He knew he'd better get them
both back to the castle and into warm, dry clothing before she took a chill. The idea of her taking sick made his stomach somersault.

  "Now, why did you chase me?” he finally asked, hoping his voice was somewhat calm.

  "To apologize, my lord. I spoke out of turn, without thinking about what I said. I had no right to assume..."

  "No, you didn't. But, in this case, I'm afraid I'll have to admit I never considered the possibility before. That was one of my misjudgments.” He looked hurt at the concept.

  "I'm sorry, Zane. I'm probably wrong."

  "No, Serena, you're most likely right. They've always spent time together when they were at court; Derek has always gone as my representative. It worked because I'd rather stay here and manage the land. Unfortunately, it only leads me to wonder what else they've conspired in the past."

  Her gasp was audible and her eyes flashed, then narrowed. “You don't think they had anything to do with your accident?"

  "I didn't in the past; now I wonder."

  "I'm sorry, my husband. I had no right to make you question your family or friends."

  "I'd say it's about time I did just that.” Too much circled through his mind to comprehend coherently so he changed the subject.

  "Why did you never go to court, Serena?"

  "My stepmother forbade it. She wanted to take center position and as Father's first born, I would usurp some of her status if I were allowed to go to London."

  "But you were only a child..."

  "It didn't matter to Lily. When I was old enough, she always made sure I was on the outs with Father so he'd leave me behind, or create a situation once we were there that made him choose her over me. William, however, has been attending with all regularity from the time he was all but too young!"

  "He seems to have been a thorn in your side from little on.” She laughed a bit but didn't answer. “Just as Derek was to me, only the idea of sending him away for a few months at a time was appealing, just to get him out from underfoot."