The Dream Virgin

by Don Quine

  She couldn’t wait to share her excitement with Daddy-O.

  Spot #14 was the spot that a brother and sister had taken for an Idea called Natural Suckers, edible fruit and veggie-flavored straws, just down the walkway from the Dream Zoo presentation.

  But the first morning after they got set up, Timmy and Tammy had it pointed out by one of the Green Guides that Reimer Gore was eaten alive by wolves only ten minutes away and they had a marketing flash.

  Timmy threw together a Wolves Eat Crazy Killer sign with a blown-up newspaper photo of Reimer’s mauled body. Staked the sign up on the ground behind their spot to give Tammy and Timmy a talk piece and a chance to hustle straws. Every purchase gets a free map to the pet cemetery where the killer met his ghastly demise.

  “The madman was malnourished in more ways than one,” Timmy would say, Tammy following up, “Cranberry Crunch’s our favorite flavor,” then hand you a sample straw with a little paper cup of water, see how the Natural Suckers flavored the sip.

  Wendy tried one. Sipped. Took a bite. “Ummmmm.”

  Wendy handed the rest of the straw to Sally who looked at the sign and said, “I read that the psycho killer was a crack addict.”

  “Meth’s a monster,” Timmy nodded.

  Sally bought a box of straws, asked Wendy to snap a shot of her by the “Crazy Killer” sign, she had a pal who read Thrillers; he’d get a big kick.

  Fred thought Daddy-O would definitely smile at her posing in front of the sign with a warped grin, but not too warped.

  Sally Singleton was sophisticated. Sally had on a Crazy cap and was looking forward to exploring what opportunities might present themselves once she arranged to move to and live in Lake Meadows.

  Hearing Randall and his friends talk, land values were going nowhere but up. If Fred made the move, she’d have to think through the implications, would need to shore up Sally’s background and bank accounts.

  Randall would nose around, as would others. Fred did not want them finding out that Reimer was Sally’s brother. That would be a problem.

  Fred watched a blackbird fly low over the walkway and land on top of a nearby Spot pole. Fred checked its big beak, and then realized it wasn’t a blackbird when it flapped its wings and said, “Yum-yums!”

  It was a raven.

  Which made Fred immediately recall that it was two ravens who spotted the Oregon Pigs, got the gang tied up to trees and busted; made to look like the fools they were. Fred wondered if this raven might have been involved. The other raven was white.

  “Ah, phooey!” Wendy said, and pointed up ahead.

  Sally puffed her half-eaten straw like it was a cigarette. Flicked it. “Phooey?”

  “It’s gonna be a bitch of a wait to see the Dream Zoo project. Supposed to be the one to see though.” Wendy hustled Sally up to the rear of the line.

  “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” was playing from the DZ speakers.

  Sally said to Wendy, “I just love this song. You know it?”

  Wendy shook her head, said, “You know Gasoline Dreams? ‘It’s to die.”

  Rachael was nearby passing out pleasantries, looking at who looked like they might have a network to tap. She eyed the two hip-looking women, early thirties. Maybe had kids at home, DZ comic book subscribers?

  “Hey, sorry for the line, but the lucid landscape’s well worth the wait; you ladies dream awake?”

  Checking out what the two knew and were into, Rachael handed out a card to the one in the gypsy outfit, chic shoes, and flirty smile. “Where you all from?”

  Sally took the card, said, “Here and there, wherever it’s good to be.” Gave Wendy a nudge. “Don’t you agree?”

  Wendy nudged back, “I for sure do, babe.”

  Rachael, Fred, and Wendy chatted for a minute, then Rachael said she had to go handle some things and would see them inside, said to herself they probably weren’t mothers. But they might dig Dream Lovers.

  Wendy studied Rachael’s card and said, “I never pay much attention to my dreams unless they’re nightmares.”

  As soon as Wendy said that Fred’s mind flashed to the nightmare it must have been for Reimer with the wolves.

  Then it flashed back to when they were kids hiding in the woods and Reimer cried, told Fred to promise not to tell Daddy-O, but he hated to have to make little animals scream, and he wanted to know if Fred would run away with him.

  It made Fred think what would have happened if they had run away and somehow escaped.

  But that kind of thinking was a slippery slope.

  CHAPTER 79

  Sunday evening Jack had the bands do their Labor Day tributes to the working class, reminding everyone jammed into S2S that there were millions of Americans without jobs.

  “Let’s pray some of your crazy ideas help create new ones!”

  Robbie Revlon flew in from Maui as a favor to Jack with a song called, Get What You Pay For. No drag queen campiness, the tune cut to the quick.

  “. . . You dump the down, pass the buck, invest in hate, someone to fuck, it’s sad to say, but you’re gonna get what you pay for . . . get what you pay for . . . get what you pay for.”

  Elfri didn’t hear the song, she was in the restroom with Nicole, helping her work through a wave of nausea during which Nicole asked Elfri if she wanted to stay in the tree house. It swayed. She’d moved almost all her stuff into Leon’s. Did Elfri know about the scar on Oliver’s butt, left cheek, from the unicycle accident when he was seven?

  When Get What You Pay For ended to rousing applause, Leon and Will stood in front of Easy Does It, toyed with their beer bottles and discussed matters.

  Then Leon told Will it was last minute, but he was thinking about having a small gathering at his place tomorrow after the tourists cleared out. Announce that he and Nicole were tying the knot.

  Will saw Molly wave to come over and deal with something at the cafe, which reminded Will to tell Leon, “I forgot to tell you. Molly said she’s doing the engagement party tomorrow at the Rest. She baked a cake. Nicole knows.”

  Leon watched Will work his way over to the cafe, then turned to the stage. Jack was keeping things moving. Dressed in jeans and a polo shirt, he looked out at everyone giving it up for his Labor Day e-ticket lineup.

  “Hey-Hey! Give a hand for the band that live like they play it, say Yay-Yay! to Hammer and Nails!”

  By the time it was Nature Calls’ turn to play, the bowling alley was a sweat lodge. Randall and his friends were dressed in overalls to go with the theme songs. Sally fit right in and Fred loved fitting into Sally who opened the world to a possible future Fred would never have dreamed of.

  Elfri waited over by pool tables with the Nestlings and watched Oliver and Jack and the band do their “Good Gigs” work song, everyone singing the refrain, “. . . Here a gig, there a gig, hard to find a good gig, but if you do what’s you, dig what’s true, you’ll find in time your own good gig to mine. . .”

  Jack looked like he could break your heart; make you feel grateful.

  Elfri could only stare at Oliver.

  She watched him move to the boiling beat, holding back, moving his hips to the edge, making her want to see what it would look like if he let it all out like he did on his Obstickle, wondered when the song was over if she had the guts to tell him she was staying at the tree house.

  Shortly after the song ended, not so much a matter of guts as yearning, Elfri asked Oliver if he want to stop by.

  Oliver said sure, he hadn’t been in the tree house for a while.

  When Elfri and Oliver climbed up there, they laid down on the bed with their clothes on. They talked and kissed and held hands and said since they knew from their dreams they were destined to be together, there was no rush to make love.

  It would happen when it happened.

  Around dawn they woke up and took off their
clothes.

  Then Elfri found out what it was like when Oliver let it all out.

  CHAPTER 80

  Labor Day ran long. So many Crazy Idea winners coming up on stage for congrats and photos and whistles and cheers.

  First prize was won by the Sunny Grill, a solar cooker for campers with a thermal battery for cloudy days.

  Second place was GluvNails. Sharona was pleased, but not alone in thinking she should have taken First.

  Third and Fourth and Fifth place winners didn’t get $50,000 and $25,000 like First and Second, but got apprenticeships in Ventures Nest’s Greenhorn program starting in the Spring.

  Big news was that out of the four hundred and eighty Crazy Ideas, sixty-three percent of them got funded, which was nine percent better than last year. Bigger news was that all five Nestling projects found backers.

  Wayne’s Mighty Tiny Vities accepted a deal with a little woman from Taiwan who owned a chain of juice bars.

  The Workout Vest wound up with a company in Canada that sold laxatives and wanted to diversify, the owner was a fitness freak who had a kid brother die in a hang-gliding accident that Manny reminded him of.

  A TV producer backed Bob Bonet with connections at Nickelodeon for Sugar & Snails. The producer’s wife was a top executive at The Cooking Channel, felt Star Treats would be find a warm welcome. She called Bob sweetie and said she knew Betty White.

  GlobeFash got five offers. Heavyweight money. Excellent offers.

  Leah turned each one down.

  Made a deal with all five.

  The big players were reluctant until Leah reminded them, “Diversity is the touchstone of teamwork, GlobeFash’s core cause. Sure, you get a smaller stake, but a bigger reward in so many more ways.” In complete charge, Leah continued, “I can sniff greed from here to Lindsay Lohan.

  And the reason I selected you all to be in this huddle is because you all smell good to me.”

  Leah held up her hand for confirmation.

  “Do I smell good to you?”

  All five heavyweights slapped hands and Leah said, “Done!”

  The number of offers Elfri got for Dream Zoo was ridiculous.

  Sixteen. All serious players.

  Elfri didn’t talk with any of them because she had a talk with Oliver the day of their first kiss by the brook when Reimer was still on the loose.

  Oliver told Elfri that Leah wanted to invest in Elfri and Dream Zoo and thought it would be a good idea for Oliver to join her, for him to come up with an additional thirty percent, go fifty-fifty with her on the available forty percent of the company.

  They would outbid the highest investment offer Elfri got.

  The way it would work was instead of Elfri exercising the option to have Ventures Nest buy twenty percent of her company based on the highest offer she got from investors, based on project valuations like they had in all of the Nestling Agreements, varied valuations were created and agreed to after the Nestling projects were given their go ahead. The Nestlings kept sixty percent of their companies and donated nine percent to whatever charity they wanted for a dollar. What would happen is instead of Oliver offering to put up twenty percent of the available thirty-nine percent of Dream Zoo, he’d put up half and Leah would put up the other half.

  Leah told Oliver she cared about Elfri like a sister and believed in her like no tomorrow. Knew how Oliver and Elfri felt about each other and seemed pretty clear where things were headed. So, why not keep it close to the Nest and keep Dream Zoo in the family?

  Oliver wanted to know how Elfri felt about that.

  Elfri kissed him and said family sounded good.

  So not to make it obvious or bend anyone out of shape, Leah flew her attorney in from Brooklyn. Andy Previn looked like a schlump, but was a killer in court.

  Andy would do their bidding for an LCC he got Nicole to sign off on. The valuation for Dream Zoo was fair: $800K. The comic book licensing, existing product line and all; track record. Miles on the highway.

  Andy made the other fifteen investors fold their tents when he offered two million, nine hundred and fifty thousand. Acted like he could go on to whatever it took, like he could give a good shit how much.

  Oliver felt a little bad about the bid-ups causing the competition to drop out, but it was great to know that Dream Zoo was highly valued, and would stay close to home.

  All these deals were worked out behind closed doors and settled before the Bash awards, the money involved in each deal not shared with the S2S audience, just the names of the players.

  The Ideas who didn’t score started slipping out of the alley around 1 p.m., grabbed free grub for the road on tables near the café; traffic was going to be a bitch.

  It was four in the afternoon when Nicole handed the mic to Oliver.

  “Okay, thank you once again, drive safely now, okay? See you soon.”

  Oliver waved to the last hundred or so Bashers who were leaving S2S, moved along toward the front doors by the Green Guides, a shuffle of shoes and goodbyes.

  By the time Leon and Nicole and Chip, Oliver and Elfri all left the alley and Molly and Will locked up the sun was setting.

  God bless America’s working class.

  What was left of it.

  CHAPTER 81

  It was pretty cornball. Leon wore slacks and a sport shirt and loafers, was on his third beer, going on how love was so much more than a red, red rose, finally kneeled on the grass, slipped a modest diamond ring on Nicole’s finger, “. . . will you do me the honor. . . ?”

  Nicole nodded like an angel, the kiss, a handful of cheers, paper horns, Nat and Natalie singing Unforgettable in the background.

  Molly put out triple-decker finger sandwiches and different cheeses and crackers and champagne and kombucha that Itty gave Chip who liked the tarty taste.

  Harry had hand-built the outdoor patio, tables, and chairs of wood and stone and bone, title floors and a barbecue built into a wall with a waterfall. Jack kept it up after his dad died, put in a new round table that Molly wanted to use for sit-downs and card games. Sat twelve, so it gave the seven of them plenty of elbowroom.

  Jack was joking around, playing Mr. Left Out.

  Elfri and Oliver joked back. Smooching in front of Jack then looking at him.

  Ha-ha. We’re in love.

  Jack looking sad.

  Then Nicole and Leon decided to join the action and started smooching, looking at Jack like aren’t we lucky, but not you. Too bad.

  Ha-ha again.

  Jack looking sadder.

  Not to be left out, Will planted a kiss on Molly’s lips, making it a triple-whammy.

  Jack hung his head down real low and said, “Comes to finding love, I get lost in a heartbeat.”

  Then Jack grabbed his guitar and went into a country-western tune about the matter, making it up as he went along, Will and Oliver joining in.

  Molly, Nicole, Elfri, and Tallula talked about babies.

  Chip talked on the phone to Itty-Biddy who told Chip he liked to be called Bill, and Chip told Bill how he’d like to be a veterinarian. Bill wanted to work on Wall Street.

  While eating heart-shaped cherry coconut cream cupcakes, Jack got a call and said something came up he had to deal with, no big thing, but he had to split.

  Right after Jack left, Elfri excused herself, she had to leave to meet with the Nestlings before they left town early tomorrow and the Associates had lots of Bash biz to go over with Oliver.

  Nicole and Molly cleaned up.

  Talked about how time flies. Make it count. Be grateful.

  Over near the barbecue, Leon and Will discussed the call that Leon received from Rahim saying that Sheriff Haskins got a call from the Enterprise county morgue.

  Someone stole Reimer Gore’s corpse.

  Will shook his head, said, keeping it low, “
Leon. I think I mentioned this before, but you’ve got your own little Peyton Place here, and that’s just a fact.”

  “We call it Heavenly Delights,” Leon said.

  Chip got up from the table with his sketchpad.

  Will, Leon, Molly, and Nicole stopped talking.

  Chip said, “I’m going for a walk,” and gave them a wave.

  His voice sounded older than someone who was twelve.

  Sally stood by Randall’s serpentine swimming pool looking out at the lake as the sun started to set, laughing at jokes and playing lovey-dovey with Wendy until Fred needed a break from casino talk and pet perversions, said she needed to make a call, kissed Wendy, took a stroll down by the shore and got on her cell phone.

  She and Daddy-O had spoken several times since Reimer died and he knew Fred was centering in on Lake Meadows as a land of opportunity. He liked the circumstances in which Fred was able to become Sally Singleton. He liked legalized gambling. Casinos were excellent laundries if you knew what you were doing. A million to cozy up to one was worth consideration.

  Daddy-O’s phone didn’t answer. Fred left a voicemail, “See you soon.”

  Chip had already visited his mom, brought her wild flowers that he picked along the way to the cemetery, sat with her a while and let her know how things were going, how it felt to talk after such a long time not saying anything. He wasn’t afraid to talk now that Reimer was dead, but he liked listening more.

  It was dusk when Chip got to the pet graveyard, sat down next to Timber’s headstone, and took a sketch from his back pocket.

  “Hi. I wanted you to see this.”

  Chip unfolded a drawing of The Driller with his fierce pack surrounding him.

  “See the wolfdog in front? That’s Timber, he’s the leader of the pack.”

  Chip talked about his comic book and how things were working out, how Elfri was going to stay in Lake Meadows and how he was going to be a big brother. Talked about selling some of his spiders and who Chip’s real father was who died from a stroke.