Waiting to Lose

by Dawn L. Chiletz

  Jake re-crossed his arms and turned his head as he listened.

  “It just seems like everything comes back around until we figure it all out; it happens the way it’s supposed to. What are the chances that our lives would connect the way they all did without a plan?”

  “Are you saying that Peter had a purpose in our lives?” Jake asked with a frown.

  “Yeah, I guess I am. Without him, maybe you wouldn’t have realized how much you cared for me, and I wouldn’t have known how strong I was or even realized how much you loved me.”

  Jake smirked.

  “I think we meet people for a reason, even if it’s just briefly on the street. I really believe all of our lives are intertwined, and I’m so grateful that fate weaved our lives together.”

  Jake moved forward and pushed a strand of Madi’s hair behind her ear. “You’re probably right. I never thought of it that way, but yeah, life has a way of putting things into perspective. For the record, I love that life brought me to you.”

  Madi smiled as her eyes gazed into his. “Everything is just as it should be.”

  He tried his best to keep her eyes preoccupied as they drove to the location.

  She adjusted the strap on her heel as she laughed at his ridiculous imitations of Rob. She didn’t seem to notice when they pulled into the arena. When the limo stopped, her eyes popped up. “Why are we here?” she asked.

  He clenched his teeth. “Don’t be too angry with me. Ang said she had some paperwork I needed to fill out and she left it at the front desk for me.”

  Madi grimaced and then smiled. “How could I be mad tonight?” She leaned back into her seat to get comfortable as Jake opened the door.

  “Want to come in for a second? For old times’ sake?”

  Madi smiled and shifted to the door. “For old times’ sake. Just don’t ask me to bring some papers down to the stage for you. I have a feeling these shoes will be off before the clock strikes twelve.”

  Jake smiled as he held his hand out for her. His heart was pounding so hard he was afraid she might hear it.

  Felix held the door to the arena where Jake had practiced for his tour back in May, when he had first met Madi. Jake remembered all their first flirtatious moments, and when he sang to her on stage. He was taken with her from the first moment they met.

  The arena was pitch black. They walked into the lobby in darkness.

  “Are you sure anyone’s even here? I can’t imagine why the doors would be unlocked,” Madi questioned.

  Jake intertwined their fingers together as he led her to the main doors. “Maybe we should just step inside.”

  Jake opened the door. Madi peeked her head in before standing in the darkness once again. Just as she turned to say something, the arena lit up in a blast of light. On the stage stood everyone she loved: her mom and dad; Kendra, Collin and Michael; and even Grandma Dee. Madi’s eyes darted from one person to the next. Ang and Dave were there, as well as Trey and Annie; Jake’s mother, Liz; his father, Mike; and his sister, Gina; all the members of Jake’s band, their families and Rob. Everyone was dressed to the max. A net of silver and white balloons hung from the ceiling. There was a full bar set up on the left as well as a band off to the side of the stage. The room glistened with balloons and pink flowers. Madi gasped as she turned to Jake in confusion. He couldn’t contain the smile on his face. It had been hard for him to keep this night a secret. He’d been planning it in his mind for months.

  “What’s going on?” she asked as she bounced with excitement.

  “I hope you don’t mind, but I thought we’d ring in the New Year with a few close friends and family members. I guess you were right. All of our lives are linked.”

  “What did you do?” she shrilled as she ran toward the stage, lifting her dress from the floor.

  Kendra bounded down the stairs and was the first to reach her. “Jake sure knows how to throw a party!”

  “You knew and you didn’t tell me?” Madi asked Kendra as she hugged Ang and Dave.

  “I was under strict orders to, and I quote, ‘keep my big mouth shut,’ as Rob said.”

  Madi’s mom and dad came up to her next. “Surprised? Jake asked us back at Thanksgiving if we’d all come out to L.A. He’s been planning this forever,” Madi’s mom said.

  Jake stood behind her and listened as he took his turn shaking hands and hugging friends and family. The band began to play “Brokenhearted” by Karmin.

  “I… I don’t understand,” Madi said as she turned to him.

  “I wanted to do something special for you,” he shrugged with a smirk.

  “You always do special things for me, but this—” Madi turned to point and the crowd of their friends “—this is beyond special.”

  Jake leaned forward and kissed her forehead lovingly. “You deserve everything. You did save my life more than once.”

  Madi lifted her lips and pressed them against his mouth. Jake sighed, knowing her surprises had just begun.

  The band played through the night, singing Kodaline’s “The One” as people in white coats walked around with trays of hors d’oeuvres and champagne.

  Jake had watched her dance with her family and laugh with his parents. On occasion, when he was staring at her across the room, he would see her glancing around, stopping only when she saw him. They didn’t need to speak. They communicated with their eyes. He knew she loved him, and his feelings for her were beyond words.

  Rob whispered to the band and made his way toward Kendra. A few moments later, the band began to play “Beneath Your Beautiful” by Labrinth. Jake and Madi’s eyes locked onto each other. Jake placed his glass down and straightened his tie, excusing himself from his sister. Madi saw him approaching and smiled. He held out his hand to her and she placed her fingers into his. He kissed her hand as he led her to the stage and pulled her against him.

  Jake held her hand against his chest. Her other hand rested on his neck and his other hand was on her back. They swayed to the music. Kendra’s movement caught Madi’s eye. Rob held his hand to her and asked her dance. She didn’t say a word. She just took his hand.

  They heard Rob say, “This song could have been written about you.”

  Madi sighed and Jake smirked, not taking his eyes off of her. She glanced back up into his eyes and bit her lip.

  “Are you having a good time?” he asked her.

  “The very best time. Did I say thank you yet?”

  “About thirty times,” he laughed, kissing her nose.

  “Did I tell you yet tonight how much I love you?” she asked.

  Jake’s brows creased as he pushed a strand of hair from her lips. “No, I don’t believe you have. But I don’t need to hear you say it. I already know.”

  Madi closed her eyes as she shook her head.

  “What?” he asked.

  “Just you,” she said.

  Ang stepped behind Jake and tapped him on the shoulder. “I’m so sorry to bother you, Jake, but the chef has a question.”

  Jake turned to Madi and she smiled, releasing his hand.

  “I’ll be right back,” he promised.

  “I know,” she smiled.

  Jake turned and winked at Ang appreciatively before going backstage. It was time.

  A few moments later, a black baby grand piano was wheeled out onto the stage. Everyone stepped back, clearing a path. Madi stared in wonder as she sipped her champagne.

  Jake took a deep breath and smiled to himself before striding toward the piano.

  Madi smiled the minute she saw him, and it lit up the room and his heart.

  He adjusted the mic on his lapel as he stood near the bench. His voice broke the chatter in the room.

  “Madi, would you join me?”

  Madi blushed as she handed her flute to Ang and lifted her dress, making her path to Jake.

  “What are you doing?” she hummed.

  Jake lifted her onto the side of the piano and she gasped in embarrassment.

  “My mus
e,” he said, pointing toward her. Everyone laughed and clapped. Madi covered her eyes with her hands.

  “She’s blushing, but she knows it true,” he said into the microphone. He sat down at his bench and stared at the keys for a moment before his eyes rose to hers.

  “The beautiful girl in front of me walked into my life as part of a contest. She found a broken, damaged man and put his pieces back together with her smile, her feistiness, her humor, and her boundless compassion and understanding. I know everyone in this room knows that it’s impossible to keep your secrets hidden from her. Maybe it’s the questions she asks, or the way her big brown eyes sear into you and make you believe that she could make you whole.”

  Madi’s hand grasped her chest as he spoke, as if it were hard to breathe.

  “It took me a while to let her in, but once I did, I realized that she had control over my heart from the moment I saw her. It’s as if my heart found its home. It’s never been easier for me to write music than when I let myself love her. I wrote this song for her, and I’d like to share it all with you tonight. This is “Saving Grace.”

  Jake’s hands floated magically over the keys. It might have been the most important song he’d ever sung.

  There are moments in your life,

  When the darkness seems to linger

  Right in front of you

  And you can’t get through

  There are times when you think

  That the pain is all that’s living

  Deep inside of you

  It becomes your truth

  I was living in the past

  Letting memories and mistakes

  Make me keep on looking back

  Never really opening up

  Never really letting in

  Never really knowing

  Where I should begin

  Then love opened up a door

  Love filled an empty space

  Love happened when an angel walked into my life

  And the pieces fell in place

  Love was worth waiting for

  Love took the dark away

  And there’s one thing that I know for sure

  She’s become my saving grace

  Puzzle pieces of my life

  Every broken edge lay scattered

  Right in front of me

  It took her to see

  Giving heart, forgiving eyes

  Hands that with a simple touch

  Began to set me free

  She’s all I need

  Words could never be enough

  To explain just how she changed my views on love

  She’s what made me open up

  She’s what made me let her in

  She’s the reason I know just where to begin

  Her Love opened up a door

  Her love filled an empty space

  Love happened when an angel walked into my life

  And the pieces fell in place

  Her love was worth waiting for

  Her love took my dark away

  And there’s only one more hope for more

  That this is where she wants to stay

  She saved me from myself

  She’s what made me realize

  It isn’t chance, it isn’t luck

  I’ve found my other side

  Your love opened up a door

  Your love filled an empty space

  Love happened when my angel walked into my life

  And the pieces fell in place

  Your love was worth waiting for

  Your love took the dark away

  And there’s one thing that I know for sure

  You’re my only Saving Grace

  When he finished singing, everyone clapped and cheered. He knew she was crying. He sang every word to her and watched her wipe her eyes. Rob brought her a handkerchief at one point, and it was the only second throughout the song when she wasn’t staring at Jake.

  As the clapping faded, Jake took the deepest breath he’d ever taken in his life. He stood and lifted Madi from the piano in front of him. He glanced down at his watch. He was right on time.

  “I love you,” she mouthed.

  He smiled as his thumb brushed a tear from her cheek and he formed his thoughts. He held her hands in his. “I know that you and I have only known each other for eight months, but in that time, we’ve been through more contests and tests than most people experience in a lifetime. When I’m away from you, I feel like a part of me is missing. When I’m with you, even if it’s in a crowded room,” he said, motioning to everyone around them, “I feel complete. I told you once that we were two sides of a coin and that without you, I’m nothing. It’s never been clearer to me than it is now. You are the other side to love that I didn’t know existed. I never knew that I was capable of what I feel for you. Because it’s more than love; it’s forever.”

  Madi lifted her hand to his cheek and he turned his face, pressing his lips into her palm. He reached up and lowered her hand in his. “At Christmas, your father told me that your love would be the greatest gift I could ever receive.”

  Madi stole a glance to her father, and Jake’s head turned to him as well. His eyes were glassy as he nodded to them.

  “He told me that you are precious and one of a kind. I agreed. I promised him that I would always put you first, no matter what, and he gave me his permission for this...”

  Madi gasped as Jake bent down in front of her on one knee. There was a collective “Awww” from the group, as well as a scream from Kendra. Madi’s eyes widened and her mouth fell open as she searched his face for answers.

  Jake squinted up at her as he reached into his pocket and produced a small black box. He held it in front of her as he spoke. “I promise you that I will always put you first. I promise you that I will always respect and appreciate your opinions, your thoughts and your feelings. I promise you that I will never take you for granted, that I will kiss you immediately upon entering a room, and that my love for you will never fade. I will always be your steak. I will always be your best friend. I will love you until the day I die, and in the life that follows.” His voice cracked as he swallowed hard. His eyes rose to hers in adoration as he opened the box. A two-carat brilliant-cut diamond on a platinum band glistened in the light, and Madi gasped. Her hands covered her mouth and her body shook.

  “Madison Ryan, you are the love of my life. I can’t imagine my existence without you. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife? Let me show you each and every day just how much you mean to me.”

  Jake glanced up into her eyes as she sobbed. “YES!” she shouted as she bounced. “Yes,” she whispered in a voice meant for him alone.

  Jake placed the ring on her finger as everyone cheered and clapped. He stood and she flew into his arms. The countdown began. 10, 9, 8…

  She pulled back and searched his face. “You are my everything,” she said. “You are my life.”

  7, 6, 5…

  “I love you, Madi.

  “I’ll love you forever.”

  4, 3, 2, 1!

  “Happy New Year!” The room broke out in a chorus as people kissed and hugged the ones they held most dear.

  “Happy New Year, baby. This is the year of you and me. Nothing will ever come between us again.” His lips gently pressed into hers as the balloons fell from the sky, surrounding them like the love from their family and friends, encircling them in a bond of their love that would last until the end of time.

  The End

  ***

  ONCE THE NEWS of their engagement hit the press, Madi became the instant obsession of Jake’s fans. They wanted to know everything about her. She had to resign her position as RA in her dorm. There was no way she could fulfill her duties with her newfound role as Jake Morgan’s fiancée. She didn’t mind. The internship was challenging and she needed the extra time to focus on her projects at work and her last few courses at the University. She moved into the condo, and Jake spent his time flying between Chicago and L.A., helping Ma
di with wedding plans.

  Madi was able to pull off a large surprise party for Jake’s twenty-ninth birthday in February, and they attended the Star Wars premiere together in March. While Jake was being interviewed on the red carpet, Madi watched him in admiration. She was so proud of him and who he was. She was proud to be his. Jake didn’t shy away from talking about her or having his picture taken with her at his side. He always held her hand and put her first. He was protective and loving every second they were together.

  Madi completed her internship in May. The company loved the free press they received by employing her. Jake’s mother offered Madi a low-level position at her consulting firm in L.A. upon her graduation. Madi asked that she be treated the same as any other new hire. She didn’t want special treatment from anyone.

  Jake attended her graduation ceremony and took pictures with her friends from school and anyone else who asked. She and Kendra threw their caps in the air and screamed together when they announced their graduating class. Kendra had decided that if she wanted to score films, the best place for her to pursue a career would be L.A. She told Madi there was no way she could let her plan a wedding without her expert advice on style and fashion. It didn’t hurt that Rob lived in L.A. He still employed all of Jake’s security, through Dave, of course. They thought they might see where dating would take them now that he no longer worked directly for Jake, although their relationship was another story altogether.

  Dave and Ang seemed content together. Ang managed Jake’s life even better than she had assisted it. Gina had agreed to become her new assistant, promising not to give her brother a hard time. Ang advised her with a wink to Madi that she had some large shoes to fill. Gina and Kendra didn’t get along quite as well. Gina apparently had flirted with Rob on New Year’s Eve, and Kendra instantly disliked her from that moment on. Their budding animosity was enough to keep Madi on her toes. It didn’t help that Gina had a thing for Rob.