To Love and to Cherish

by Leigh Greenwood

  Jared had argued with himself the whole way into town, but he kept coming up with the same unsatisfactory answer. His thoughts were derailed when he reached the main street and saw Martha Simpson struggling to hold on to her hat in the wind without dropping her packages. Amused, he quickly dismounted and tied his horse to the rail.

  “Let me help you.”

  Martha Simpson’s smile was dazzling. “Thank you so much. I was hoping some gentleman would come along and offer to help. I would pick the time when everyone is having lunch to do my shopping.”

  Jared took both packages. “That’s a pretty hat. It would be a shame to lose it.”

  Martha readjusted her hat and tied it securely under her chin. “Especially since I just bought it. My father said it was far too expensive, that it was a sign of vanity.” She sighed. “I fear I must plead guilty. But a girl needs to look her best if she wants to attract the attention of the right man, doesn’t she?”

  Maybe others did, but Laurie didn’t need fancy hats or dazzling smiles to start his heart racing. “Yes, I agree.”

  Her hat securely on her head, Martha retrieved her packages. “I’d better hurry home. I’m sure at least half a dozen people are watching us this very minute. To see an unmarried young woman blushing as she walks with a man—especially one who has just offered to carry her packages—will start half the town gossiping. By suppertime everyone will believe we’re walking out. By breakfast tomorrow we’ll be engaged.”

  Jared was surprised she appeared so ill at ease with that eventuality. “I’m sure you wouldn’t make such an important decision that quickly.”

  She sighed. “I wouldn’t get the chance. My father expects a long and very public courtship followed by a long and very public engagement culminating in a simple yet very public wedding.”

  She looked so crestfallen he couldn’t help but smile. “I take it you object.”

  “I think falling in love is a private affair between the two people who are in love. It shouldn’t need to be displayed to the whole community for their approval. Nor do I believe it has to be drawn out for more than a year. Do you agree with me?”

  The sudden shift surprised him. “Most emphatically. I think two people can fall in love almost instantly, but getting married is never simple. There are questions to be answered, conflicts to be resolved that would become awkward if they had to be worked out in the public eye. Everybody would have their own opinion, but the only important opinions are those of the two people in love.” He didn’t want to think of what public opinion would say about his relationship with Laurie.

  “I’m so happy you agree with me I could kiss you.”

  Her unexpected response caused Jared to chuckle. “That really would start the gossips going.”

  “I wouldn’t care.”

  Jared had thought Martha was very pretty the first time he met her and hadn’t hesitated to say so, but if she was really flirting, this was moving too fast even for him. Unexpectedly she stopped in front of her father’s newspaper office.

  “Thanks so much for helping me.” She accompanied that with a brilliant smile. “One package is for my mother and the other for my father. They’re both in the office today. The weekly newspaper is due out tomorrow.”

  “Is there anything newsworthy?”

  She tilted her head to the right. “Do you think there should be?”

  Jared was undergoing the unaccustomed experience of having a woman move so fast he couldn’t keep up. It left him feeling unmanned. “As long as it’s good news.”

  “Isn’t love always good news?”

  “Not always, especially in the eyes of others.”

  “Then I must be careful to keep it out of sight. Thanks again.”

  She went inside, leaving Jared feeling shell-shocked. He was used to women showing an open interest in him, but never had one appeared to pursue him so openly. He was even more surprised to find he wasn’t comfortable with it.

  ***

  “I haven’t made up my mind about the loan yet,” Norman told Jared. “There are some things happening that make me uneasy about lending such a large amount of money at this time.”

  “What things?” Jared didn’t think Norman was referring to a competing bank because Laurie had said that wasn’t likely to happen.

  “I’m not free to discuss them just now, but things could change at any moment.”

  Jared got the feeling Norman really was genuinely worried, but he didn’t trust the man. “I can’t wait much longer for you to make up your mind. The herd will be coming through the territory sometime in the next few weeks. If I don’t have the money, I’ll lose my chance to buy it.”

  “I still don’t see why you insist on Herefords.”

  Jared struggled to rein in his anger and frustration. “I’ve already explained that.”

  “Tell me again.”

  Jared signed in exasperation. “The previous owner of the ranch said longhorns didn’t carry the kind of weight he needed to make a profit with the limited grass in the valley. This ranch is a partnership that includes my nephew and the four men who work for me. We’ll put every dollar we have left into the herd. Herefords are the only breed that can make a substantial profit here.”

  “How do you know? No one else has brought them into Arizona.”

  “They’ve been used with success in other dry areas.”

  “Why can’t you buy a few and see how they do?”

  “As you said, there aren’t any Herefords in Arizona. The man bringing this herd intended to take them to California without realizing the difficulties. I believe he’ll sell the whole herd here for a discounted price, but he won’t sell part of it knowing he has to take the rest to California anyway. It’s all or nothing, and I don’t have enough money to buy them all.”

  Norman stared at his hands, his mind seemingly on something else.

  “Is this about Laurie working for me?”

  That brought Norman out of his abstraction. “I’ve made it plain from the first that I disapproved of Laurie working for you. It endangers her reputation.”

  “Are you saying you won’t give me the loan as long as Laurie continues to work for me?”

  “If you were married, there wouldn’t be any need for Laurie to work for you.”

  Jared’s thoughts skidded to a halt. “I haven’t said anything about marrying. I haven’t fallen in love with anyone.”

  “It’s not necessary to fall in love to marry,” Norman said. “To my way of thinking, it would be a distraction. Emotions are very fragile things that change without warning. It’s better to think of marriage as a business proposition.”

  “Are you saying I ought to marry a woman for her money?”

  Norman seemed to be losing patience. “I’m saying you shouldn’t think of marrying Laurie for her money.”

  Jared took a moment while he struggled to swallow his instinctive response. “I’m not thinking of marrying anyone, with or without money. I certainly can’t be planning to marry Laurie for her money. She’s working for me because she doesn’t have any. You have it all.”

  “That’s not true,” Norman announced with unnecessary emphasis. “It’s simply a misunderstanding. Women can’t understand matters of finance like a man can. I’ve explained that I will take care of everything for her, which is what my brother’s will directed me to do.”

  “As Laurie sees it, she doesn’t have any money. You shouldn’t be surprised if she marries to change that.”

  “Laurie will remain a widow out of respect for my brother’s memory,” Norman declared. “That’s why it’s important that she stop working for you. It’s embarrassing to have a Spencer working as a cook and housekeeper.”

  “Again, are you saying you won’t give me the loan as long as Laurie works for me?”

  Norman was still evasive. “I’m saying you ought to get married. Then you wouldn’t need Laurie or any other woman to work for you. Be assured I am considering your request for a loan, but I can’t g
ive you a decision just yet.”

  Jared found himself outside on the boardwalk wondering just what it would take to convince Norman to give him the loan. It was clear he wasn’t going to grant the loan as long as Laurie was working for Jared, but it wasn’t clear that he would grant the loan if Jared asked her to leave. That put him in a difficult position.

  If he used Laurie’s money, which he was certain he would get, he wouldn’t have the money to give Steve and the men the kind of stake for the future they deserved. He certainly wouldn’t be in a position to marry. If he decided not to use Laurie’s money, he had no assurance that Norman would grant the loan. He wouldn’t put it past Norman to be using the loan as bait to get Jared to fire Laurie, then refuse to give Jared the money.

  He could justify that if he was certain of the loan. It would be a difficult decision, but it would be a business decision. Laurie wouldn’t like it. He wouldn’t like it. Steve and the men would hate it, but everybody would understand.

  He hoped.

  Colby came out of the mercantile and was coming in his direction. Jared had a sudden thought. He walked to meet Colby.

  “I can see from the look in your eyes that you’re going to try again to convince me that we’re brothers.”

  “I wish I could, but I know you’re set against it.”

  “I’m not set against it. I just don’t see any point in thinking about something that neither one of us can prove.”

  “What if we could?”

  “If you had incontrovertible proof, I’d be happy to welcome you as one of my brothers. I’ve always wanted to know what happened to them, but that kind of proof doesn’t exist.”

  “How do you know?” Jared tried again. “What did your parents tell you?”

  “They wanted me to think of them as my only parents so it was best I forget about my real family.”

  “Do you still know where your adoptive parents live?”

  “Yes.”

  “Would you write them and ask if they have anything, or know anything, that could be used to prove we’re brothers?”

  “This means a lot to you, doesn’t it?”

  “I thought it meant a lot to you.”

  “It did until I married Naomi and got a family of my own.” Colby was silent for a moment. “It would be hard at this point in my life to learn to feel like a brother to you or anyone else. We have none of the years together, none of the shared experiences to build on. It would be like trying to become best friends when we might not have been friends at all.”

  “I’ve thought about this a lot. I understand the difficulties, but it’s something I can’t forget. Despite having Steve, I feel like I’m missing my family. I know this is an imposition, but would you write your family and ask?”

  Colby hesitated so long Jared thought he was going to refuse.

  “Okay, I’ll do it, but I doubt they’ll answer. I’ve had no communication with them since I ran away fifteen years ago. As far as I know, they never tried to find me.”

  “Thank you. If you don’t get a reply, I promise I won’t bother you with this again.”

  Colby’s mouth twisted. “I don’t believe a word of that. You’ll discover we have the same ears or our big toes turn in the same direction, and you’ll take that as incontrovertible proof.”

  Jared laughed. “No, but I might think your sense of humor is. My father always said I wasn’t serious enough.”

  “That’s not what I hear. Now I hate to be rude, but I’ve got eight oxen waiting impatiently to exhaust themselves hauling timber down from the rim.”

  As he watched Colby walk away, an idea came to Jared. Colby was much too capable to spend the rest of his life hauling goods up and down the valley. The territory needed a marshal, and Jared still had some good contacts in the army. He would write and ask if they would give that job to Colby. With his knowledge of the territory and his relationship with the people in the area, he would be a perfect choice. Colby may not accept that they were brothers, but Jared was sure they were. What man wouldn’t do something like this for his little brother?

  ***

  Jared couldn’t seem to get away from the questions that bedeviled him: Should he fire Laurie and hope Norman would give him the loan? Should he reject Laurie’s offer for a partnership and try to make it with longhorns? Or should he keep Laurie’s money and accept that he’d never have the kind of financial success he’d hoped? He had no one to blame but himself for getting into this situation. If he hadn’t been so stunned by Laurie and the thought of having her around all the time, he would have stopped long enough to sit down and run the numbers.

  The men had tried to tell him, but he’d been so excited about getting the herd—and spilling over with lust for Laurie—that he’d ignored their warnings. Now he’d put them and himself in a difficult position. Knowing what he knew, it wasn’t going to be easy to face Laurie and the men over the supper table, but he was so late he wouldn’t have time to come up with a strategy. He hoped he would be able to make them believe all was well.

  Everyone was at the table when he entered the kitchen.

  “Where have you been?” Steve asked. “I tried to get Miss Laurie to hold supper for you, but she said you knew what time she had to leave.”

  Without a word, Laurie got up and moved to fix a plate for Jared. He was relieved she didn’t seem upset with him.

  “She was right not to wait,” he told Steve. “I got to talking with Colby and lost track of time.”

  “Did you convince him that he might be your brother?”

  “No, but he did agree to write his parents to ask if they have anything that might help us decide one way or the other.”

  “I don’t see why you care,” Loomis said. “You don’t know him. You might not even like him once you do.”

  “I’ve got four brothers,” Nick offered. “You won’t like them, but you can have any one of them you want.”

  Jared accepted the plate Laurie handed him and took his place at the table.

  “What do you think Colby’s parents might be able to tell him?” Laurie asked when she was seated again.

  “I don’t know, but anything would be more than we have now.”

  “I’m surprised Colby agreed to write that letter. He hasn’t had contact with his parents since he ran away.”

  “What did you do to this ham?” Uninterested in whether or not Colby could be Jared’s brother, Odell was savoring the ham like it was manna from heaven. “I’ve never tasted anything like it.”

  “Is something wrong with it?” Laurie asked.

  “It’s wonderful.”

  “Don’t bother to ask how she cooked it,” Nick said. “You won’t be able to make it taste the same.”

  “I could try.”

  “Not while Laurie is within a hundred miles of this place,” Loomis said. “She not only cooks a lot better than you, she looks a lot better, too.”

  “Hell, I look better than Odell,” Nick said.

  “Not so you would notice,” Clay told him.

  This led to a general discussion of which man was the best looking. Steve said they ought to disqualify Jared because nobody could beat him. Nick and Clay objected to that and appealed to Laurie to decide the issue. She declined because she said she would have to rule in favor of her boss, or he might fire her.

  “We wouldn’t let him do anything that crazy,” Loomis insisted.

  “He wouldn’t anyway,” Steve said. “He likes her.”

  “Not as much as I do,” Nick declared. “In Sicily, she would be declared as beautiful as a Greek goddess.”

  “How would you know?” Jared demanded irritably. “I doubt you’ve ever been to Sicily.”

  “I was conceived in Sicily,” Nick said. “It is in my blood.”

  Jared didn’t share in the laughter that greeted Nick’s assertion.

  “I think you’re all very handsome,” Laurie stated.

  “Not Odell,” Steve insisted. “Even his horse doesn’t like him.�
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  More laughter only succeeded in exacerbating Jared’s temper. It was bad enough that they stared at Laurie like bug-eyed youths with their tongues hanging out. They didn’t have to be so silly about it. And why was Laurie laughing and smiling at them? Didn’t she know that only encouraged their foolishness? They were grown men who ought to know better. They didn’t see him hanging on Laurie’s every word and gesture like a lovesick puppy.

  “I bet you’re the most beautiful woman in the Arizona Territory,” Steve said.

  “That goes without saying,” Loomis said. “You can include all the land west of the Mississippi.”

  “Why not include the whole country?” Jared wanted to know. “No need to stop there. Make it Europe, too, maybe even the whole world.”

  “Don’t you think Miss Laurie’s beautiful?” Steve asked his uncle.

  “Of course I do. I’m not blind, but it’s got to be embarrassing to her to have all of you gushing over her.”

  Loomis turned to Laurie. “Are we embarrassing you?”

  She laughed lightly. “Not at all. I enjoy seeing all of you laugh and have fun. It’s probably a sign of poor character in me, but I even like being told I’m attractive.”

  “None of us would ever be guilty of using such a poor word as ‘attractive’ when talking about you,” Loomis said.

  Jared wanted to smash his fist into Loomis’s face and wipe away that besotted look. It was one thing to be appreciative of a woman’s beauty. It was another to understand the proper ways to express it.

  “I’ve always said she was beautiful,” Steve informed everyone. “I’ll keep saying it until I find a word that says even more than that.”

  “‘Pretty’ would be quite enough,” Laurie said.

  “Pretty is for girls,” Loomis said.

  “It’s obvious Laurie is no longer a girl,” Nick said.

  Jared was sure he would have indigestion if he listened to another word. He thought Laurie was beautiful—he’d told her so many times he now felt embarrassed remembering it—but he hadn’t done it in this overly saccharine manner. Nick tried to act like he was a Sicilian noble, and Steve was only a kid, but Loomis should know better.