Always on My Mind (The Dawson Brothers, #1)

by Jessica Mills

  “Well, I guess that’s the way it goes. No one born here ever leaves, but I had hopes for you, son. I had all the faith that you would.” As the old man walked away I ordered another beer and tried to forget about singing and Sarah. The reality of the latter slowly burned in my gut.

  Chapter 10

  Sarah

  My stomach was doing flips all the way through traffic as I headed into work. There was no way around the ass-chewing I was going to get and it wasn’t the first time my boss, Rowena Burke, had made a meal of me. I parked my car and hurried into the building, wasting no time to get it over with.

  As soon as I walked into the lobby at Elder Tree Management, Betty, Rowena’s secretary, waved me back. The look on her face was nearly apologetic as she opened the door, as if doing so were sending me to my doom. With a deep breath, I stepped inside and Betty quietly closed the door behind me.

  Rowena sat at her desk behind a pile of papers talking into her phone that sat before her on speaker. “Make it happen.” Her voice was anything but pleasant and I wondered what kind of chewing the person on the other end had gotten, especially when his apologetic reply was cut off mid-sentence. Her sharp, gunmetal grey eyes glanced up at me through her blond bangs. Her layered hair reminded me of a rock star as did the black leather jacket and jeans she wore. Her style was professional, but edgy and I always wished I could pull it off.

  I took a seat. “I love your jacket.” The words fell from my lips like some giddy fan meeting their favorite movie star and I wished like hell I could take them back.

  “Do you?” She eyed my own clothes and leaned back in her chair. “Thanks. So, what have you got for me?” I’d never had much of a poker face and before I could speak she held up her hand to stop me. “Don’t tell me the trip to Texas, this week-long voyage you’ve been on, didn’t produce a winner.”

  “I got all the way down there expecting a real talent, but it was all just bullshit. I’m sorry. I trusted Rick would spot me a winner considering our past. He owed me a favor.”

  “You said you’d heard this girl, that it was a sure thing.” She rested her arms up over her head, a little too relaxed for my liking. She didn’t fool me. Rowena Burke was like a lioness, slow on the prowl, and quick to pounce on whatever weak zebra she could take down and I was feeling black and white.

  “I had heard a sample, she sounded promising. It’s just Rick knew what to send. He sent the only clip where she’d actually hit a key.” I wouldn’t tell her that when I’d gotten there, I’d found the tone-deaf girl on her knees behind Rick’s desk, giving him the pleasure I used to. I’d told her that Rick and I were old friends, but I’d not gone into the fact that we were once a thing, until he traded me in for another, who, to my knowledge, he’d just married. He hadn’t zipped his pants fast enough to welcome me and I stormed out of the office angry and a little jealous.

  He’d caught up with me before I reached my car, his fool flavor-of-the-week still wiping her mouth behind him. He begged me to come back in so he could give me her pitch, and like a fool I followed. The real kick in the ass came later, when his wife showed up, but by then I knew I’d been used. It only solidified my suspicions that the girl was too much of a liability for him. And the only favor he was doing, was for himself.

  “It wasn’t going to work out. I went there thinking he was throwing me a bone and instead I got the dog.”

  Rowena leaned forward, her grey eyes narrowed. “I took you in because my partner said you had real spirit, but so far all I’ve seen is a scared little girl playing wannabe and letting old wounds hold you back.” She shook her head and curled her lip in a disgusted way, leaving me to feel small. “I don’t think you’re cut out for this kind of work. People are falling over themselves to get representation and you walk in here dressed like you’re selling Bibles, after chasing down a lead from your old boyfriend.”

  My brow twitched. I didn’t think she knew about that.

  “Yeah, I called around. While you were off in Texas licking your wounds.”

  I chose my next words carefully and hoped what I had to say wouldn’t make things worse. “I was in Oklahoma.”

  Her face lit with surprise. “Oklahoma? Not Texas?”

  I held up a hand. “Please, let me explain. You’re right, I was licking my wounds, and I was ashamed and afraid to come back with nothing. I ended up taking a little detour to clear my head.”

  “I’d say spending days in Oklahoma is not quite a detour. It’s a waste.”

  “Well, the truth is I found a wonderfully talented singer. He’s the total package.” My heart sank thinking of David and against my better judgement I spewed on about him, not sure what the hell I was doing. I just couldn’t look like a total failure in front of Rowena.

  Rowena took a deep breath and leaned back in her seat. “So, let me hear him.”

  “Well, that’s the problem, I don’t have a demo. He was singing in a bar when I found him; a little dive in a small town.”

  “So, bring him into the studio, I’d love to meet this total package.” She didn’t sound convinced, so I continued my sales pitch.

  “Oh, he is. He’s gorgeous, a real cowboy. Works on a ranch, has the body, the face and the voice. I think he’s got a big future. He’s possibly the next George Strait. I mean, that good.” I nodded my head, smiling, as if the gesture would add authenticity, but the woman was a hard sell.

  “Bring. Him. In.” She met my eyes directly and smiled the type of smile that one only gave when their patience was wearing thin.

  My own smile faded. “There’s a bit of a complication. I’m not sure I can get him here. I’m working on it, though. It’s just he works his family’s ranch and it’s hard for him to get away. His family is giving him a hard time and...”

  “Sounds to me he’s not really interested in pursuing a singing career. So, it’s your job to convince him that this is what’s going to secure his future. Bring him in, Sarah.” I started to speak, but she held up a hand to cut me off. “Let me put it to you like this, before you start to feed me more excuses that I don’t want to hear. You have one more chance.”

  I could do this. One week to find somebody was no problem. “I’ll find someone, I won’t let you down.”

  “No, not just anybody, I want to hear this cowboy. You’ve got till Monday next week. I don’t care how you go about it or what you have to do. Drag him here kicking and screaming, or at least find me a demo and get him on FaceTime. Just don’t come back here without him.”

  My heart sank. I had no idea how I was going to reach out to David again after what happened. My face reddened as the heat crept in, I couldn’t go to his house. I couldn’t go off to Oklahoma again and face him and his fiancée. I’d have to get in touch some other way.

  “Okay, thanks.” I left her office with my heart in my throat and I hurried to the nearest bathroom feeling like I might throw up. Luckily I held it together and went to my desk.

  I pulled up Facebook hoping he’d have a page and maybe even some samples uploaded like most musicians and singers, but he didn’t. The searches through Sound Cloud and Twitter were all failed attempts, as well as Google, which only brought up old articles from when he sold a prize-winning cow. He’d obviously missed the social media wave by a mile.

  There was only one way I was going to reach out to him without showing up on his doorstep like an idiot with my tail tucked between my legs, and that was calling the Dew Drop. I could reach out to Norm, but after David punched him in the eye, I didn’t think it was the best option; last resort, maybe. I looked up the hotel online and as luck would have it, I found the number. I jotted it down and stared at the paper.

  I imagined some old gal answering the phone when I called, and hoped like hell that she’d be willing to give David the message. No telling what people in town thought of me. Surely in a small place like that, word had gotten around what a fool I’d been. How I’d come into town and lured poor David to cheat on his young bride-to-be. I’d be
lucky if I was ever welcomed back, much less have the luck of getting his friends to give him messages from me— a.k.a. the city-girl homewrecker.

  I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat and glanced down at my blazer, which suddenly didn’t feel as comfortable as it had when I put it on that morning. I needed a style make-over, no doubt. Maybe something new would boost my confidence. Shopping had always been my best therapy. Maybe I’d pick up something edgy like Rowena. The thought sparked interest. There was only one person who would help me with that, and if I was lucky, I’d catch her on her day off. I tucked the phone number under my keyboard and called Jenn.

  She answered on the first ring. “Please tell me this isn’t an emergency and you’re not in Oklahoma again.”

  “Funny. No, I just thought you might want to grab some dinner later and do some shopping, if you have time.”

  The phone vibrated as Jenn giggled a little too close to the receiver. “Shopping? So, you’ve resorted to therapy, I can’t say I didn’t see this coming. I only wish I’d suggested it.”

  “Well, that and my boss told me I looked like a Bible salesman.” I ran my hands through my hair and leaned back in my chair.

  “Ouch. It’s not all that bad. Weathergirl, maybe.” Her laughter boomed again, making me cut down my volume.

  “I’ll pick you up around five, funny lady. And as my friend, I’m holding you responsible for my fashion faux-pas. I want to look my best when I see David again. I made the mistake of comparing him to the King of Country Music and now I’ve got to put my money where my mouth is.”

  She went silent and I would have thought she’d hung up if I hadn’t heard her breathing. I was just about to say something when she spoke. “Girl, promise me it’s all business this time. I can’t condone you chasing after him. I know before you had no clue, but...”

  “It’s all business. Trust me, I wouldn’t even be considering him, but I’ve got until Monday next week to produce that singing cowboy for Rowena Burke or she’s going to kill my dream of being an agent.” A gnawing feeling ate at my gut remembering her haunting grey eyes sizing me up. I’d go back in that office of hers with proof of my cowboy if it was the last move I made at Elder Tree. I prayed it wouldn’t be.

  “Don’t forget we need to stop off at Pilates tonight.”

  David had me so mixed up I’d forgotten what day it was. “Right, we’ll have time for both.”

  I heard a pause in the sound through the line and then Jenn made a noise of frustration. “Hey, I got another call, see you tonight.” The phone went silent and I hung up and stared at my desk.

  I searched the Internet again, just to make sure that I wasn’t missing something. I’d found a few things about his brother Luke’s FFA wins, and even Mason and Luke’s Facebook profiles. I didn’t dare send a friend request, but luckily they were public. I double-checked those for any posts about Kinsey’s or David’s performances, but then I remembered his family wasn’t that supportive of his dreams. My heart ached thinking about him so I tried to busy myself by tidying up my desk and listening to some new singers who had sent in demos. None of them had anything close to the talent that David had.

  He was a natural.

  It was no use, no matter how many distractions I gave myself, I kept thinking about his strong hands and how they touched me. His lips were tender, yet strong against mine, as well as against the tender bud between my legs. Heat throbbed there just thinking about him, and I couldn’t help but want him again. No. No. No. I crossed my legs, trying to soothe the slow ache that burned through me. I knew it was wrong, but it could have been perfect with us. I’d have my client and the perfect boyfriend, and he’d have gotten out of the small town just like he’d always wanted.

  I couldn’t understand why he’d confided in me. He seemed genuine, like he’d wanted to get away and start something new and had the freedom to do so. Maybe it was cold feet talking and he was only trying to have one last fling before tying the knot with Ella. I wasn’t the first woman to be taken by someone like him and I wouldn’t be the last. Too bad it didn’t dull the shame I felt for jumping into a sexual relationship with him so soon. I’d never done anything like that before; not so shortly after meeting someone, especially a potential client, though there hadn’t been too many of them.

  The slip of paper with the number to Kinsey’s kept catching my eye. I pulled it out from under my keyboard and after staring at it, and doing a back and forth trying to decide whether or not to call it, I tucked the slip of paper into the side pocket of my handbag.

  Chapter 11

  David

  The best thing about building a new round pen was trying it out, and my brother Mason couldn’t wait to get our newest horse in the pen. I’d brought her out, leading her by a rope, and handed her over to my brother.

  As he took off her lead and put her in the pen, I noticed how petite she was compared to most horses. Silly enough, it made me think of Sarah, such a tiny little lady too. Man, I couldn’t get her out of my head. I tried to focus on Mason who wasn’t having any luck. The horse snorted and twitched nervously, not used to the pen. “Calm her down or pull her out, Mase.” I kept my voice low as not to spook her any more than she was.

  Mason glanced my way and spit on the ground and I waited for him to tell me to mind my own business. With a smile, I leaned against the fence quietly, folded my arms, and watched him work his magic.

  For some reason, it made me think of that first day that Sarah showed up on the ranch. She’d been so determined and full of spirit. I knew I wanted to break her too. I remembered the noise she’d made when I scooped her up behind me into the saddle. It was a lot like the noises she made when I slid deep inside her. The memory of her spread out on my truck had me adjusting myself. If I didn’t stop the reminiscing I’d have to go up to the house and take a cold shower.

  Ted shouted from beside me, “You’re supposed to work them, not let them work you.”

  Mason gave him the finger and continued.

  “He’ll get her. She’s never been in before.” I walked away, taking a rest against another post. I didn’t care to be near Ted after what had happened, but he followed, resting his arms against the fence.

  “You really liked that one, didn’t you?” He cut a glance in my direction and I knew he wasn’t referring to the horse.

  “Why? You regret not sleeping with her too?” I didn’t care how bitter it sounded, I didn’t want to talk to Ted about Sarah.

  “You gonna be pissed off at me for the rest of our lives?” He kept his eyes forward, but I studied his face and my fist twitched as I imagined it making contact.

  I spit on the ground. “You took what was mine.”

  “Bullshit, if she was really yours she wouldn’t have strayed that easily. We’d only had a couple of drinks and she’s the one who made the first move. You know I wasn’t the only one. When I say, I did you a favor, I’m not just trying to get under your skin, Davey. I mean it. She wasn’t good enough for you.” He met my eyes and dammit, he meant it. The fact that he made so much sense made it hard to hate him. “Are you going after that agent?”

  “Her name is Sarah, and she took off without even asking me about Ella. She didn’t even leave me a number.”

  He nudged me. “I don’t blame her. Mama told her that you and Ella were engaged and from what I heard—”

  “What?” I yelled so loud I spooked the horse.

  “Yeah, why do you think she took off out of here? Mama told her you were engaged and Ella rubbed it in with a bunch of talk about how you were going to run the ranch together. Mama told her to say it. She thought that city girl was going to come here and talk you into leaving. I thought you knew.”

  “No, I thought she just left not wanting the drama of my mother bringing around my exes. I’ve been so damned mad I didn’t ask.” My gut twisted into knots.

  “Well, don’t go upsetting Mama over it, she’s sick enough already. She’s scared you’ll run off. You know her and
Dad need us all more than ever. They aren’t getting any younger or healthier from the looks of things. She had another one of those coughing spells earlier.” He took off his cap and swatted a bug on the fence.

  “I won’t say anything to her. I know she means well. But I’m letting Ella have it if I ever see her again. I hope I don’t, and you’re right, by the way, you did me a favor.” Without another word, I patted his shoulder and walked off toward the house. I had to find Sarah. I had to tell her it was all a big misunderstanding. At least then I could get on with my life with a clear conscience.

  I went to the kitchen to get a drink and ran into Luke who was peeking underneath the lid of whatever Mama had left to simmer. “Mama’s gonna tan your hide for disturbing the pot.”

  Luke startled and dropped the lid. “Not if you shut your trap. She’ll never know.”

  “You mess up her stew and she will. She always says she knows when we interrupted the process.” I got a glass out of the cupboard and filled it with water from the tap.

  Luke leaned back against the counter. “She only says that when it don’t turn out to suit her.” We exchanged a chuckle.

  Mama was the best cook I knew, but she never was satisfied with her talents even though she never got any complaints from us boys when it came to her cooking.

  “What do you have going on today?” I gulped down the water as he shrugged.

  “Nothing. Chores are all done. I’d rather not hang around here.” He snatched a cookie from the crock and wasted no time shoving it in his mouth whole.

  “I need help finding Sarah and was hoping you’d go with me to Perryville to use a computer.” I raised a brow waiting for him to admonish me for my lack of computer savvy, but instead he gave me an affirmative nod.

  “Sure.” Then a slow smile spread across his face. “You like her, don’t you?” He gave me a teasing nudge and since he was about to help me out with the Internet, I decided to let it slide.