Love Him Back

by Kris Nacole

  Dad chimed in, “Don’t you dare fall in love with any British men there. You have to come back home eventually.”

  I had to laugh at that one. Zane wasn’t British. “I won’t, Dad.”

  “Okay, we’ll let you go, honey,” Mom said. “Have fun and call us when you can. We love you, sweetie.”

  “I will. Thank you. I love y’all and miss y’all so much,” I said, proud of myself for not allowing the tears to flow even though I could have cried.

  After hanging up, Zane smiled at me, but he didn’t say anything.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Y’all?” he teased.

  I sighed, “Between you and Erik, I’m never gonna get a break, am I?”

  “Hey, I’m not making fun.” He bumped his shoulder to mine. “I like it. Your accent is sexy as hell.”

  I swallowed hard and flashed a smile. I was pretty flattered, actually.

  Sexy, huh?

  When we arrived in London, I couldn’t believe how stately it was. The last time I’d seen London was in a movie. All except for the couple minutes I saw it from the airplane window.

  London…I couldn’t believe I was here in this breathtakingly beautiful city.

  I was so busy looking around and up at all the historic buildings that I tripped over my own feet when I stepped off the bus. Zane was behind me and caught me, thank goodness.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “Yes, physically, I’m fine.” My ego, on the other hand…

  He let go of me and handed my backpack to me.

  Erik ran up to me and handed me a map. “Time’s a wastin’. Let’s go.”

  “I’m coming,” I said, rolling my eyes at him.

  “Not yet, you’re not,” Zane whispered, so only I could hear.

  I squeezed my thighs together at the thought. He’s definitely not shy and certainly has no filter. I looked around to see if anyone else had heard him. He chuckled. I could feel the blush on my cheeks.

  Zane grabbed my hand and turned me around to face him. “Tonight? Eight o’clock at the Ten Bells?” he said with a hopeful voice.

  Erik butted in, “Hey man, why don’t you and your friends hang with us for a while, and then we can all do the Ripper tour tonight? It’s on my bucket list, anyway.”

  Zane thought about it then went to talk to his friends. A few of them agreed while the others decided to meet up with us later for drinks.

  “Sure, man. Why not?” Zane said back to Erik.

  Erik turned his back to Zane and gave me a discrete thumbs up.

  That little shit. He did that on purpose.

  How did he know I was interested in Zane? Didn’t matter, I guess. I gave Erik a big hug and whispered a quick, “thank you”.

  “You’re welcome,” he silently mouthed with a definite wink of approval.

  We’d spent the entire day exploring London. We were able to tour a lot of places by riding the famous red open-top buses, which helped keep my feet from aching so badly. After seeing Buckingham Palace, the Tower of London, Trafalgar Square, and Big Ben, it was time to head over to the Jack the Ripper tour and meet up with everyone else. We got caught up in a rain storm a few times, but I wouldn’t have traded it for the world. I’d had the best day making memories with people who made me happy.

  The Jack the Ripper tour was our last stop of the night before going to have some drinks. It was like nothing I’d ever experienced. Knowing we were walking down the streets where gruesome murders had taken place gave me chills. On the other hand, the mystery of it all fascinated me. We turned a corner and were suddenly in a dark alley. The only light we had was a small lantern the guide was carrying.

  The tour guide grabbed me out of the group and used me as a prop for one of his stories. At one point, he grabbed my arm and told me to look down. His lantern trailed down my side and shone onto the ground below my feet. “This, my lady, is the exact spot Jack the Ripper allegedly murdered one of his many victims,” he said in a way-too-creepy voice.

  I shivered at the thought and jumped back into the crowd, but I bumped into someone and lost my balance.

  “Easy now,” Zane whispered into my ear. “I’ve got you.”

  Why did I have to be so darn clumsy?

  Zane’s strong, warm hands trailed down my arms to steady me, and then he grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together. It was so dark I couldn’t see his face. Maybe it was a good thing he couldn’t see my face because mine was ten shades of red.

  I could feel myself falling even deeper. Hand holding was a whole other level for us. Well, for me anyway. I wasn’t sure if he felt the same. Once we emerged from the alley and started heading to the next site, Zane let go of my hand and started chatting with a few guys from the group. Not gonna lie, it kind of pissed me off. Was he afraid to be seen with me? Afraid for others to see he liked me? Or did he just like playing with my emotions?

  Maybe Ian was right when he’d told me I wasn’t worthy of anyone’s love. Maybe there really was something wrong with me.

  Whatever Zane’s problem was, I’d have to get to the bottom of it, quickly.

  At the end of the tour, we went to Ten Bells for some drinks. It was eerie sitting in the pub where the victims of Jack the Ripper had drunk. The small building was brimming with Victorian charm. Not surprising since it’d been established in the eighteenth century. The inside was decorated to look exactly as it did back in the Victorian Era. Being inside was like traveling through time. There was a dark wraparound bar with old-looking bar stools. In the corner was a large nineteenth century painting and scattered throughout were pictures of Jack the Ripper’s victims that were linked to the Ten Bells. Apparently, witnesses had spotted them at the Ten Bells, drinking, before they were murdered.

  Ugh.

  When our table was ready, we made our way upstairs to enjoy some British pub food and have a few drinks. The upstairs was splendid. There wasn’t a bare wall in the place. Every square inch was covered by designs made with colored tiles and gilded picture frames. The walls were painted in hues of blues, greens, and browns to match the furniture. There was a huge crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling and a neon sign that read ‘Keep me Safe’. Pretty ironic, considering the history of the place...

  After eating, drinking, and sharing some laughs, we had about an hour until we had to return to the bus.

  During dinner, I’d noticed Zane watching me from across the table, but I kept my head down for the most part.

  What I would give for just a few minutes alone with him.

  “Right, Chesney? Hello?” Emberly said, snapping me out of my daze.

  I blinked at her. “Hmm? Sorry, what?”

  “I was saying how badly you wanted to ride the London Eye. I’m sorry we weren’t able to fit it in this trip.” She frowned.

  “Are you kidding? This has been the best birthday ever. Thank you for kidnapping me.” I gave them all a genuine smile.

  Zane spoke up, “No way. We still have time. Let’s go.” He stood up and urged me to do the same.

  “Right now?” I asked, glancing at my watch.

  “Yes, now.” He pulled me to my feet and pushed me forward excitedly. “If we hurry, maybe we can catch the last ride of the night.”

  Yes, yes, oh God, yes! I wanted to scream. Play it cool, Chesney.

  Reaching into my backpack, I pulled my wallet out. “Alright, let me go pay my bill first.”

  “No, it’s your birthday. My treat.” He winked at me and picked up my check.

  “Y’all be cautious now,” Erik said under his breath.

  I turned to face him. “Erik, if you don’t stop making fun of my accent, your photo is gonna be hanging up there with the victims.” I gave my best scolding eyes and a slow creepy grin.

  That should shut him up.

  “Okay, sheesh,” Erik laughed.

  “She’s feisty!” I heard one of Zane’s friends say as we started down the stairs.

  Zane and I were the only two who went.
The rest of our group hadn’t finished eating or drinking yet. They wanted to stay behind at the bar, so we made plans to meet back up with them at the bus.

  We rushed down the sidewalk to the nearest underground.

  Walking out of the Westminster Station, Zane held out his arm, and I looped mine through. When we got to the top of the steps and turned the corner, there was Big Ben, tall and bright, right in front of me. An involuntary gasp left my throat as I drank in the beauty of it all. It was surreal.

  A flash startled me and brought my attention back to Zane. “Hey.” I frowned at him.

  He grinned. “You had a moment. I thought I’d capture it. The look on your face was priceless. No matter how many times you see it, it’s overwhelming, especially at night,” he said, looping my arm back in his.

  “Listen.” He pointed up at the tower, and just as the words left his mouth, the most beautiful chime echoed through the air.

  I couldn’t believe I was really standing there, in person, listening to Big Ben chime. We weren’t the only ones stopping. Clumps of tourists stopped and looked up in awe. The only other sound around were the cars passing.

  “Wow,” I breathed.

  He looked at me sweetly, almost making me blush again.

  “I’m glad we got here in time, so you could experience this. It’s much more impressive at night than during the day. Now, let’s get moving, so we can make the last ride before the Eye closes.”

  “Yes, sir!” I said playfully with a pseudo-salute.

  “Oh, please,” he said amusingly.

  At the Eye of London, we rushed up to the lady sitting behind the ticket booth.

  I couldn’t believe how massive the wheel was. It shone brightly through the darkness and was glowing a shimmering blue color. The water below rendered a rippling reflection of the wheel.

  Zane placed his hand on the small of my back as I entered the capsule. There was no one in line behind us, so we were alone. I nervously made my way to the opposite side and looked out over the water. The attendant closed the door, leaving us alone in the dark. The only illumination we had was the lights from the city and the soft, blue glow surrounding us.

  Oh, this isn’t good. This isn’t good at all. I’m in so much trouble.

  Knowing we were alone, four hundred and forty-three feet in the air, was unnerving to say the least. The wheel moved slowly, and I knew it took twenty minutes for it to do a full rotation. A lot could happen in twenty minutes.

  Electricity buzzed behind me, notifying me of Zane’s presence. My back was to him as I gazed out at the majestic city below. From behind he placed his strong hands on the glass in front of me and leaned in closer.

  “Breathtaking, isn’t it?” he asked, his breath tickling my ear.

  “Y-yes. It is,” I stammered, drawing in a sharp breath.

  With his tantalizing body against mine, I could feel the cold glass on my front and his warmth covering my back. The contrast between the two made me shiver.

  “All the lights remind me of home,” I said with a smile, fighting the urge to lean back into him. “They remind me of lightnin’ bugs, lighting up the night sky.”

  “Lightnin’ bugs?” He chuckled. I could almost feel the rumble against my back. “Tell me more,” he demanded in a husky whisper.

  I swallowed hard, my voice cracking as I spoke. “They coast through the night sky flashing a special pattern of light, only for a few seconds, hoping to attract the perfect mate,” I replied slowly, emphasizing the word mate a little more than I probably should have in that moment.

  A low, guttural sound came from Zane’s throat. “Go on.”

  “Then their light fades until they glow again. They’re alluring. Little messengers whispering through the darkness, searching for love. Like all of us, I suppose.”

  Tilting my head back, I let my cheek rest against his shoulder. He slid one of his hands down around my waist and pulled me closer.

  His fingers trailed across my stomach, giving me goosebumps. “Oh, you mean fireflies,” he said softly.

  My body was reeling from the chemistry radiating between us. I needed him closer. “Yes,” I managed to utter, breathlessly.

  “Do you want to be my firefly, Chesney?” he whispered. He brought his hand up to my face and gently nudged my chin, so he could have access to my neck.

  Yes, oh yes, I’ll be anything you want me to be.

  “Maybe,” I responded provocatively, liking where the moment was heading and proud that I was able to show some restraint—enough to drive him crazy in the best possible way.

  My temperature rose as he responded with such a depth to his voice, “Maybe?” he challenged.

  I put my hands on the glass inside of his then started to turn to face him. But before I could, his fingers slid effortlessly between mine as he entwined our fingers against the smooth glass. I could barely breathe as his soft, warm lips traveled down my neck and found that spot just below my ear. The one that made me weak in the knees.

  Curling my toes, I moaned, closed my eyes, and rotated my head even more to expose my neck.

  “Open your eyes, Chesney,” he said in an airy, yet demanding, tone. “I want you to see how perfect this moment is. I need you to feel how much I want you right now.”

  Slowly opening my eyes, I tried to concentrate on the city below. There were thousands of people walking the streets, yet no one could see us. It was intoxicating standing there, in the middle of London, overlooking the River Thames and Big Ben, knowing that the people below were clueless about what we were doing. The thought thrilled me.

  He kissed my neck down to my shoulder; then, he slowly turned me to face him. Warmth emitted from him to every fiber of my being in a fierce, lustful, and mesmerizing wave. My back was against the cold glass and his hard body was against my front, creating a raging storm inside of me. With a sudden sense of urgency, he wrapped my ponytail around his hand and pulled my head up so that I was looking at him. Then he grabbed my hair band and slowly pulled it out of my hair, sending my long, wavy, brown locks cascading down around my shoulders and face.

  Every nerve ending in my body yearned for him. He tipped my chin up and stroked his fingers along my cheek and chin. With fathomless eyes, he watched beneath lowered lashes as my body responded to his.

  His hips bore into mine, and his hardness against my center was stimulating. Knowing I had that affect on him made me want him even more. Linking my fingers through the belt loops on his shorts, I ground his body against mine and reveled in the feeling of ecstasy pulsing through me.

  Licking his lips, he brought his hands up and ran them slowly through my hair. Then his lips brushed against my cheek. “That’s it, Chesney. You’re my firefly.”

  With his lips poised over mine, he waited there, his chest rising and falling as he stared at me with desire-filled eyes.

  “I’m your firefly,” I whispered against his lips. He was wearing me down with every word he spoke.

  He moved his lips around to my ear. “I can pleasure you in ways you’ve never imagined. Let me show you,” he whispered, making my knees buckle slightly.

  I gasped and then moaned.

  He traced my neck with his fingertips and then my cheek. Then, he cupped my face and kissed me—fiercely.

  His kiss shattered me. It shattered the wall I’d worked so hard to build. Nobody else had been able to break through—until now. Until him. I knew in this moment that I’d lost the battle.

  My heart was his.

  Her lips were soft against mine. I couldn’t stop and didn’t want to. I wanted her badly, but not like the other women I’d been with. She was different, but I wasn’t sure why.

  Her skirt hugged her waist in a way that made me want to run my fingers under it and grab her thighs. On the other hand, the skirt would look much better on the floor.

  She was thick in all the right places. I pushed my hips harder into her. I could take her right here in this capsule, if she’d let me. I wanted to feel her legs wr
apped around my waist.

  Chesney was the girl-next-door, a Southern belle, the kind of girl most guys would love to take home to Mom. She wasn’t the type to sleep with just anyone. With a little work, I’d hoped I could win her over. It would be a challenge, but she’d be worth it. Besides, maybe if I sealed the deal with her, I could finally move on.

  Deep down, though, I knew one time wouldn’t be enough, and again that scared the hell out of me. I’d called her my firefly. I don’t know what came over me. I could feel myself breaking inside. The wall around my heart was crumbling whether I liked it or not.

  So what the hell do I do now?

  We barely made it back to the bus. As we rounded the corner of the bus stop, we could see Erik frantically looking around for us and begging the bus driver not to leave yet.

  He crossed his arms. “It’s about time you, two. You owe me. If it wasn’t for me, the driver would’ve left fifteen minutes ago!” he scolded as we sprinted toward the bus and leapt on board.

  “Sorry. One time around on that thing takes twenty minutes. Once we were on, there was no getting off until then. Thank you for your adept stall tactics though,” I said, laughing.

  I gave him a big hug and quickly pushed past him to find a seat near the back of the bus.

  “Thanks, man!” I heard Zane say behind me.

  We settled into our seats at the back of the bus. It wasn’t as full as it had been on our trip there, so everyone was able to spread out. I thought Zane would sit near his buddies, but he took the seat next to mine.

  “What’d you guys do?” Greer, one of Zane’s friends, asked with a smirk.

  Zane shrugged. “I showed Chesney the Eye. We barely caught the last ride of the night. It was fun up there…wasn’t it, Chesney?” He bumped my shoulder. I could practically feel his smirk.

  “Yeah, it was great.” I swallowed, feeling my cheeks flush.

  I bit my bottom lip and cut my eyes at him as I thought about what had happened only minutes earlier.

  “Stop doing that,” Zane whispered gruffly while shifting in his seat.

  “Stop doing what?” I asked.