One Real Thing

by Anah Crow

  “Good,” he said. “Come to bed. I want to get you ready for me.” For him. No one else. Finally Holly was all his.

  Holly crept onto the foot of the bed, but it was only so he could kiss Nick’s feet and rub his cheek against them. He made needy sounds as he pressed openmouthed kisses to the arches. Breathing hard, he pulled away with an obvious effort and crawled up to where Nick could touch him, straddling Nick’s hips.

  Nick cupped Holly’s cheek and kissed him on the mouth. Lightly this time. He didn’t want to forget what he was doing. Curling his other hand around Holly’s hip, Nick rolled them over so he was on top and staring down into Holly’s wide, too-blue eyes.

  “I’m going to give you what you want,” he murmured, “but I want to play with you first. I want to touch you and taste you and fuck you with my fingers until you’re begging for it.” In grad school he’d jerked off so much thinking about all the ways he wanted Holly, he was surprised he hadn’t pulled a muscle. Now he wanted to put all those fantasies into action.

  Holly nodded, then added, “Yes, Nick.” His voice was low, and Nick realized with a jolt that the roughness he’d heard all morning was from Holly’s throat being raw after Nick had fucked his mouth so deep. “Anything. I want you to have everything. You don’t have to ask.”

  Nick kissed him, soft and slow, and then pulled back to say, “I wasn’t asking permission. I was telling you what to expect.” He slid his hand between their bodies and found Holly’s cock, stroking lightly, barely touching.

  “Oh.” Holly let his hands fall to the pillow beside his head. “Okay.” Nick loved the way Holly just gave in like that.

  “Knees up,” he murmured, shifting to the side so Holly could obey. Then he knelt between Holly’s legs and trailed his hands down the sensitive skin of Holly’s inner thighs. “Beautiful.”

  Holly’s breathing had settled to a slow, shallow pace. “Can’t believe this is real.”

  “Very, very real.”

  Nick kept having to remind himself this was real too. It helped to touch. He leaned over to taste, to tease his tongue over the head of Holly’s cock. Oh yeah, that helped too. Holly let out a soft, wordless cry and parted his thighs even more.

  “Nick.” He didn’t push or beg, though. He lay there and let Nick have him. Nick licked and kissed, but didn’t suck, didn’t take his cock into his mouth. He wanted to feel the clench of Holly’s body as he came.

  “You’re going to be good, aren’t you, Holly?” Nick looked up from where he was nuzzling the base of Holly’s cock. “You’re not going to come until I’m inside you, are you?”

  “Yes, Nick,” Holly whispered. He reached down and stroked Nick’s hair. “If it makes you happy.” His blue eyes were wide and unfocused, like he was high, but Nick knew he hadn’t had anything to drink or take. “I won’t come until you tell me to.”

  God, that was a rush. Holly was incredible.

  “I knew you’d be good.” Nick sucked Holly’s cock into his mouth as a reward for both of them. It had been so long since he’d done anything like this. He explored every smooth, hard inch with his tongue, tasting everything.

  Holly was so relaxed. He sighed and moaned softly, petting Nick’s hair with his fingertips once in a while, but he didn’t interfere otherwise. Nick could feel how good it was for him, the way shivers ran through him and his dick was so hard, but the desperation that had been in his tone and body language just minutes before was completely gone.

  Nick took his time, feeling Holly’s dick fill him up over and over again. When he finally pulled back, he could taste Holly, but Holly still hadn’t come. Nick found the lube and slicked his fingers, then teased them behind Holly’s balls.

  Holly groaned like it was torn out of him. He trembled, but he didn’t beg. He simply pulled his knees up and put his hands behind them. Nick could see how ready Holly was, how much he wanted it, but Nick just kept circling his fingers over that crinkled skin. He pressed lightly, but not enough to push inside.

  Holly was so easy. Quiet and submissive, but still making those delicious noises and opening up for Nick’s touches so eagerly.

  “I want this so much,” Holly whispered.

  “I want you.” Nick pushed one finger in slowly, so slowly, feeling Holly’s body draw him in deeper like it was begging for more. With his other hand, he stroked Holly’s saliva-slickened cock and rolled Holly’s balls over his fingers, playing. God, he wanted Holly so much, but he wanted to savor every moment of having him.

  The sounds Holly made were incredible: sweet, naked, raw moans of pleasure at every touch. The way he moved, the way he was so yielding and the way he sounded made Nick feel like he was the center of Holly’s universe. Thick beads of precome rose at the tip of Holly’s cock, but Holly didn’t show any signs of losing control, just as promised.

  “You’re so good,” Nick praised. He slid another finger in beside the first and fucked Holly with them. The way Holly opened up to him—physically and emotionally—was a rush that went straight through Nick and made him want to forget all about going slow.

  “That,” Holly whispered, trembling slightly. “I want to be good for you.”

  “I know,” Nick said. He could tell with everything Holly did. “You are. You will be.” He teased Holly with two fingers and then three, determined not to give in until Holly needed it.

  Holly didn’t beg or make demands, but Nick could tell when he was reaching his limit. He planted his feet on the bed, hands groping and kneading the insides of his thighs, leaving prints on the pale skin. His cries got sharper, and his ass clenched around Nick’s fingers in waves.

  That was close enough to begging for Nick. He’d long since hit the point where he was so hard he hurt. With his clean hand, he found the box of condoms and dumped it, then rolled one on. Only then did he ease his fingers out.

  He didn’t bother asking if Holly was ready for him—he could see how ready Holly was—he just lined up and pushed in. Holly inhaled sharply, eyes wide, as though he were waking up to what was happening to him.

  “Nick. Oh fuck, yes.” Holly reached for him with both hands, his body welcoming Nick inside. Holly was looking at him like Nick was the entire world, everything good. That was perfect.

  Nick slid in, slid home, and held still for a moment, letting them both adjust to the feeling. For all the teasing and playing, Holly was so tight around him, like his body was trying to hold Nick there.

  “You feel so good like this, Holly. So good.”

  Nick couldn’t manage to take it slow. He pulled out almost all the way and then pushed in deep and fast, again and again, kneeling back enough that he could watch his cock sliding in and out of Holly’s body. God, of all the things he thought he’d never see or feel, this had been at the top of the list. Yet here he was. And it was amazing. Holly was amazing, the way he looked at Nick, the way he felt, the way he sounded.

  Holly was quiet at first, breathless, but when Nick moved, he gasped with each thrust, gasps that turned into cries. He knotted his hands in the sheets, looking utterly overwhelmed. Between the cries came broken sobbing, pleasure and emotion woven together. Nick wanted to listen to Holly, but he couldn’t hold back his own moans.

  “Holly. Oh God, Holly.”

  Holly didn’t have any words for him, just one raw, wild cry after another. He shifted, but only to wrap his thighs around Nick’s waist, riding Nick nearly as much as Nick was fucking him. All the times Nick had walked in on him, Holly had never been this into sex. Nick had never seen him get fucked or give it all up to anyone like they owned him, but he was seeing it now, and the intensity was beautiful. Nick wasn’t going to last much longer, not with how Holly made him feel.

  Wrapping his slick hand around Holly’s cock, he said, “I want you to come.” He couldn’t think of anything he wanted more than that right now, to see Holly’s face twisted with pleasure. Holly focused on Nick like he needed to make sure who it was.

  “Nick…” he breathed, and then he went t
aut, his back arching. As incoherent as he had been all along, now he found words, now he begged and pleaded as he shot all over his chest, body shaking with it. “God, please. Please, don’t stop, please, don’t go. I need you, I need you, I need you. Fuck, Nick, please. Please, I’ll do anything, Nick, please.”

  Oh God. It was everything Nick used to dream about hearing from Holly—and more. Nick knew all that need was real; he could see it in Holly’s face, hear it in Holly’s voice. He had to let go of Holly’s dick so he could brace himself on both hands.

  Nick couldn’t keep himself in check anymore. Not after that. He fucked Holly hard, with deep, uneven thrusts as he finally came. Holly’s eyes were fixed on his face, so, so wide, like he wasn’t sure it was all real.

  “I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much. Only you.”

  Hearing that wasn’t ever going to get old. When Nick finally came back down from the high of coming like that, he dipped his head and kissed Holly on the mouth.

  “I love you too. I do.” It felt so right to say it.

  “I know.” Holly’s voice was thick, and his eyes were too bright. He slid his arms around Nick’s shoulders and hung on. “After a while I got that you loved me, in your way. I just never thought you wanted me. And I didn’t blame you. But now—” he kissed Nick back softly, “—now I see.”

  “I do.” Nick shifted, pulled out and slid up over Holly to kiss him more easily. He stripped off the spent condom and shoved it into the empty condom box. “So much. I always did. I just couldn’t show you.” He’d been too busy following his own set of rules, rules that had led him to put together a life that had fallen apart at the first sign of trouble. “But I can now.”

  “I want you to.” Holly pushed his face under Nick’s jaw and hid in the curve of Nick’s neck. “I wanted you so much. Wanted you to be the one to have me like this.”

  “I have you now.” Nick rolled them onto their sides, but he didn’t make Holly show his face. He just petted Holly’s hair, soothing him. “I have you, and I won’t let go.”

  “I hardly know what to do,” Holly said quietly. “I just…My whole life…I don’t know what’s going to happen anymore. I never expected this.” Nick knew that feeling—both of those feelings—all too well.

  “Neither did I. But I think, between the two of us, we can figure it out.” Nick didn’t want to let this go, didn’t want it to be a passing affair while he got back on his feet, and he knew Holly didn’t want that either. “You said I could have whatever I wanted, no strings attached.” Nick kissed Holly again and then pulled back so Holly could see his face. “What I want is strings. And I think you do too. You’re still wearing my ring.”

  “I can’t take it off. It hurts too much, like I’m falling apart. From the minute I put it on,” Holly confessed. He closed his eyes and bumped his nose against Nick’s jaw. “Yes, I want strings. I want to be connected to you always. I felt like I was connected…I just had to keep living without that piece of me.”

  “Not anymore.” Nick wrapped Holly in his arms and kissed his temple. “Keep the ring. Don’t take it off. I don’t want you to. I want to know it’s there. I want you to be mine.”

  Holly hung on to him and took deep, unsteady breaths. “I am,” he said at last.

  “I know.” Nick had always wanted Holly to need him, and now he could see that Holly always had, but it had been hidden beneath the surface. “Mine, and I’m going to keep you. I won’t let you go again, not without me.”

  Holly sighed, slow and shaky. He slid his leg over Nick’s hips. “I want to stay here all day.” His voice was as uneven as his breathing, and so low, like he was confessing. But once he started talking, words kept pouring out.

  “Days and days. Days of you touching me and watching me and taking me whenever you want me, all day and all night. I want your hands on me. I want to kiss your feet and sit at your knee, every minute. I want to lie around the house naked so you can see me, just me, every time you look. I want to take care of everything so you think of nothing but me and anything else that makes you happy. I want to be so totally yours that you forget there was ever a time I wasn’t with you. I want to learn everything you want and need so you don’t even have to speak, I’ll just know what to do by the way you breathe or glance or smile. It’s all I ever wanted.”

  “Do you have any idea how incredible you are?” Nick could hardly believe he’d gotten so lucky. This was his second chance, and he was going to make the most of it. “I want you to know me like that. I want to be able to look at you every time I open my eyes. I want to touch every part of you to make you mine.” He wanted to start now.

  “Touch me.” Holly snuggled closer. “I’ve been so lonely without you,” he added, his voice getting so ragged Nick could barely make out the words.

  Nick ran his hands down Holly’s back and up again to tangle in Holly’s hair. “You don’t need to be lonely anymore.” And neither did Nick. “I’m right here. I’m here and you’re here, and whatever comes next, we’ll figure out how to make sure that part doesn’t change.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Days passed that way, just Nick and Holly, the way it had been when Nick first brought Holly from L.A. This time, though, Holly was the one working while Nick dozed beside him. Nick had relaxed into the routine of it, of having Holly there with him all the time, when Holly paused as he was stepping out of the shower to say, “I need to go check on the promotion we’re starting at the store. Would you be okay with that?”

  “Yes.” Nick kissed Holly, lightly, to reward him for asking. “You can go to work. I’ll see you when you’re finished.”

  “Come on.” Holly leaned over and turned off the water. “Let me dry you off. Did you get enough to eat?”

  “I’ll eat more in a bit,” Nick promised, pushing aside the curtain so they could step out.

  “I’ll make sure there’s something there for you.” Holly wrapped a towel around Nick’s shoulders and took another to work his way up from Nick’s feet. He was careful and attentive, like always, and there were so many kisses.

  When Nick’s feet were dry, Holly bent to kiss them. It was so unexpectedly, beautifully sexy, every time. Nick didn’t have any particular erotic ideas about his feet, but Holly’s kisses weren’t about Nick’s feet; they were about Holly’s surrender.

  “You’re beautiful.”

  “I’m glad you’re getting better.” Holly put his forehead on Nick’s feet and sighed, the long lines of tension in his back slowly easing. When he looked up, his face was suffused with adoration. He’d looked at Nick like that before, then pulled away and covered it up with teasing when Nick said something sharp. But now it was real.

  “I was just…” Nick didn’t even know how to describe it, how to explain that there’d been nothing wrong with him except a lot of uncertainty and indecision. “I’m going to be fine. Thank you.”

  “You don’t have to thank me for anything. I still can’t believe this is really happening.”

  Nick picked up the towel off his shoulders and dried his hair. “Give it time.”

  He intended to make sure they had a lot of it. He wasn’t ever letting this go, not if he could help it.

  “I like the sound of that.” Holly apparently couldn’t resist giving Nick’s cock a nuzzle, moving on reluctantly. He did manage to get Nick dried off without going back to it. “Go on and lie down,” he said at last. “I’ll come give you a rubdown and tuck you in once I clean up here.”

  Nick stole a kiss on his way out but left the bathroom and sprawled on his belly in bed. The bed seemed less like a lonely haven since Holly had joined him in it. Holly padded out, still naked, and came over to him with the massage oil in hand.

  “I wish I could do more,” he said, settling on the edge of the bed. His warm, slick hands slid over Nick’s shoulders a moment later.

  Nick couldn’t hold back a purr of pleasure. “You’re doing a lot, Holly.” More than he had any right to expect, more than he co
uld’ve hoped for.

  “You got fucked over, and I can’t fix it. I feel useless. Someone hurts the most important person in my life, I want to be able to do something about it.” In spite of how fierce he sounded, Holly’s hands were gentle.

  “You are, Holly.” Nick turned his head so he could see Holly out of the corner of his eye. “You’re here with me. That’s what I need. Caroline, Max—they can wait.” Realizing his life was so damn fake had hurt more than Caroline leaving him.

  “Okay. Tell me when you need more. It’s not just me being helpful. She took you away from me and then she hurt you.” Holly’s voice broke at that and he fell silent.

  “You have me now,” Nick said to soothe him.

  “I’ll start taking you for granted in about fifty years. Maybe longer.” Holly kissed Nick’s ass and nuzzled along his thighs. “I always regretted that I didn’t fight for you harder, but I didn’t want to lose you completely. I’m never making that mistake again. I’ll kick your ass if you think you’re going anywhere, ever again.” He bit Nick’s ass enough to sting.

  Nick yelped and flinched, swatting at Holly with one hand. “Fucker. I haven’t gone anywhere.”

  Holly laughed at him and kissed where he’d bitten, then growled and nuzzled where Nick’s thighs met his ass. His tongue flicked out to tease behind Nick’s balls. Oh. Oh yeah. Nick started to spread his legs, to let Holly in, but…

  “Didn’t you need to go to work? If you’re good, you can do that when you get back.” Nick knew Holly would be good for him. In all kinds of ways. God, just the thought of Holly’s mouth on his skin like that was enough to send a flash of heat racing through him.

  Holly whined and his cheek landed on one of Nick’s ass cheeks. Nick knew the exact expression Holly had on his face. Mean ol’ Nick. Boo. Nick had seen it many times back when Holly was in college, and then not for years.

  “Promise?” Holly sounded sweetly hopeful.

  Nick’s life had turned some kind of corner when he wasn’t looking, and it was all Holly’s fault. “If you’re good, yes.”