War Torn Love

by Londo, Jay M.

  Once the fire was started, Poppa and Abram were gone out in the forest, for a good patch of time - before all this, they would go hunting together. My Poppa taught him how to hunt, as his own father was not a hunter. And since Poppa had two girls he was all too happy to take him under his wing. Turns out, while they were gone they set several snares, in an attempt at trapping us some possible game to eat. Soon, none of us would had the strength to keep going on, so they set out to catch something. We would all need to keep our strength up, if we intended to keep pushing ourselves forward. I knew if I did not get something to eat before long. I was not going to be able to breast-feed Abiela, my body would not produce any milk. I would grow much too weak. She was drinking an awful lot of milk these days; I was getting real worried about it all it all. I did not bring this up with Abram, he was already worried enough, and working so hard to do whatever he could to find food, and help- out in any other way he could. Talking it over with Maryam, she said she could help.

  After the fire was built, and then we all finally had an opportunity to actually sit down and unwind, Abram came to me and sat down alongside me. He opened his powerful arms, and then he pulled me in and next to his warm body. I leaned my head on his shoulder. Then I began to cry. Somehow now being in his arms, it felt different to me, because Abram was holding me in a way I knew now I could finally let a small measure of my mounting grief out, coming to terms, mourning my mother’s premature death. Seeing my distress, he rubbed his hands through my long hair. He rubbed my back, gently messaging me. Just about this time, our darling precious Abiela woke up from her nap, and surprise, surprise she seemed to be hungry once more, and undeniably needed to be changed, this was proving somewhat of a predicament without a whole lot of baby supplies with me. I looked down at her, as she suckled on my right breast.

  I thought of all the different times my own dear Momma had done the very thing unselfishly for me, all the times growing up she was there so lovingly for me. I wanted to be the type of woman my Momma raised me to be, live up to the women she would be proud of. A kind of mother my own daughter would be proud of as well.

  Poppa posted at least two people on guard duties. Right through the night taking turns, so we could all to get a couple of hours of needed sleep - truthfully, I do not think any of us truly slept. Concerned we were being tracked down by some German soldiers, the thought of them looking for us, rooted uneasiness with all of us, I could not had anticipated how exhausting not being able to let your guard down. Add that to a lack of sleep, hunger, and experiencing such loss of life, it could create a real monster in each of us. I darn And the fact we were being forced to sleep on the bare ground did not help matters.

  At first signs of light, light barely filtering down through the thick layers of leafs above

  Poppa and Abram went out and checked the snares they set the evening before. I know that they really were hoping to catch us a meal, we all were. Our prayers were heard, -God once again providing us some sustenance. They had managed to catch prey in two of the five snares - two large rabbits. It was not much to feed us all, but at least it was something to put on our tummies. They cleaned the rabbits before coming back into camp. Abram was holding the rabbits proudly up high. When we saw them, we all cheered.

  Before we ate Poppa said a prayer - we all prayed, in all the excitement of having a chance to consume some food at last, I must confess I had not noticed as little as a share of rabbit meat, as we had each received. Still somehow, Abram had secretly given me his own share, only had he pretended to have eaten. Being concerned about me. He knew I needed to maintain my strength in order to be capable to provide for our daughters needs, since I was breastfeeding her still. The rabbit was utterly delicious. Then after we ate, the men studied the single map they carried, we grudgingly started moving on once more. Not long afterwards setting out, we ran into a patch of wild blue berries. We spent a good hour picking and eating every single one, I do not think after we were done, there was a single berry left on any of those bushes.

  We were all bewildered later on in the day - we unexpectedly ran into other group of fleeing Jews. We had heard them first, thinking they may be German soldiers. We all took cover and hid out, until we spotted them, and clearly saw they were not soldiers. We made our own presences known. Discovering that they too were being placed under much the same circumstances as us - there was no alternative; we had to all try to band together work as a team if we had any sort of likelihood of surviving through this horrible mess. There must have been a hundred of us now, homeless - all wanting nothing more than to make it to freedom. And they too had their own horror stories of what happened to them. So rather than going on any further for the day, we built ourselves a fire, making camp, having a chance at getting acquainted with one another.

  The men all gathered and chatted, deciding what to do as an assemblage, where it was we would go from here. Poppa spoke up - the other men that had not been in our group had not yet developed any real plan, they had not even possessed a map between them, lacking a person strong enough, charismatic enough to stick out to take charge and lead this rag tag bunch. So bearing in mind that they had none, they liked Poppa’s proposal. Because my father is so respected in, the whole Jewish community and they all knew Abram my husband - who did not know him? They chose to put Poppa in charge. I thought this may be good for him, keeping him busy right now may be just what he needed, he would not have time to feel sorry for himself, miss Momma so much.

  The families that joined us were from the next town over; we had known a few of people that had joined up with us. The Germans had done much the same to their town. Many were killed according to the reports.

  The further we travelled, the more people we came across – we became worried it may be a trap, knowing sooner or later if the Germans were not paying attention to us, sooner or later they would had to figure there was some of us out here. Another such problem created by being joined up with even more and more people. I studied their faces. The life seemed to be draining from their face. Everyone’s hunger was clearly catching up with them. We simply did not had a whole lot of food to go around in the midst of some many. This was a mounting concern if we were going to continue to press on, we were all growing quite hungry, about the only thing we had an abundance of was people, and water. The children, and pregnant, and nursing women were chosen our top priority to be feed first.

  Also this mass exodus might draw uncalled for attention on our growing community. Nevertheless, it was not just Jews that were joining up with us - there were wayward Polish soldiers, and people from all walks of lives - that were afraid of the Germans, as much as we were. As others were amalgamation with us, the men were careful to take stock who they were, and what they carried with them, that could be helpful to all of us. Clothing, guns, and food, medicine were the most coveted.

  We traveled for a month - it began to steadily grow colder, the weather changing. We were all growing weaker by the day. Word had gotten to us through some of our freshest arrivals, our only access still to the outside word. They informed us that to our dismay, Poland had ultimately surrendered to the Germans forces three days prior to their arrival. Upon hearing this news, it felt like it was all over. I felt numb upon hearing this disturbing news. I grew weak at the knees. They also were quick to caution us that almost immediately after taking over that the Germans were taking measures - harsh measures aimed at the entire Jewish population. Upon hearing this information, we all were horror-struck. That meant that we needed now more than ever to considered essential for us to escape Poland altogether. We needed to make our way south, once and for all. I threw up after hearing all this.

  Fortunately, for us some of the men carried guns as well as ammo with them. There was a hunting campaign formed, together with my Poppa wanted us to get to fresh meat. Oh mercifully for all our prayers were being answered when the men made their way back to camp today just before night fall, they had been gone since first light, they were back with two l
arge deer. Immediately after butchering the animals, we started cooking the venison meat.

  As the meat slowly cooked, a huge starving audience had formed watching it. The fat dripping down on the hot coals, producing a popping, sort of a sizzling sound. That night raised our spirits a bit, but soon, we were dragged down into drudgery again.

  The way we were force to live, always on the move. Never staying put for more than one day. It felt like we were becoming a nomadic people. Traveling to the south, the best we could do to still maintain staying in the forest, which was becoming increasingly difficult to do. If we found ourselves journey through an open space, we waited until the Vail of darkness to cross over. More than once, we spotted German soldiers. One day some of our scouts had spotted several German tanks, traveling down a nearby road. Sporadically we took a chance when we ran into sympathetic Polish nationals that did not want to rally round the German occupiers that had taken over our country. We started receiving some assistance from a resistance force that had been set up. We did whatever we could, to get our hands on food for our hungry families even if it meant we had to resort to stealing -we felt God would understand in this situation.

  Chapter Fifteen

  “My personal account of more than winter”

  A key concern that was quite a predicament - life threatening in fact - the nights where growing much colder. There was definitely a presence of winter. Which inevitably meant for us that we were losing the added elements of the natural concealment – the leaved had long since left the trees – we were now into mid October, perhaps later? A cold Polish winter now worried us all. Everybody was apprehensive about the possibility of being spotted by any Germans fighter planes flying overhead. The solution was not to be seen - if we did hear a plane-drawing close, each one of us immediately take cover right next a tree trunk hoping that would conceal us - Fires were only built under fir trees, to conceal the flame. We hoped they would not be flying during the night

  We had to be vigilant in everything- one serious mistake, and it could be life threatening to all of us. None of us were remotely prepared for the onset of colder incoming weather conditions - most of our stuff had to be left behind in our quick getaway. We had never planned on being in these conditions. Things are getting quite critical for all our survival, the worry was clear in Poppa’s eyes the stress was clearly taking a toll on him. This inescapable meant that the weather was tipping well past freezing every single night now. Getting through the nights was next to impossible when you begin to freeze. I kept Abiela next to my body, under my clothing, trying to keep her warm. Each morning there was a thick layer of frost covered the ground. The leaves would crunch as you stepped on them. The days were only in the low forties, and that was on a sunny, windless day, if we were so lucky.

  It seemed that every day lost at least one person. To the cold, or hunger, or from injuries sustained from the Germans, or even their wills being broken, - they simply gave up -, only the strongest of faith and will, were the ones that were going to pull through this in the end. Many were caught chest colds due to exposure. There was nothing we could do about it though, which made us feel even worse.

  Finally, we acknowledged we should be thinking of holding up for the winter. The old and young just could not keep up or keep going on at this pace. We had made it to the broad fir forest of the Tatra mountain range -, the final stage in our trek, before we our able to cross the border. Of course, this proved to be our most difficult leg of our journey. We were situated in a spacious basin, in the high country. Much less populated Tatra Mountains, quite a ways up in elevation.

  The objective was to try to make our way to the town of Osturna - to be found just over the border safely inside in Slovakia. We had wanted to make it over the border prior to winter setting in, but we were too late. Caught off guard because of deplorable weather as well as challenging terrain.

  More and more I turned to Abram to lift my spirits! Negative thoughts were getting stronger by the day, and I was not normally that sort of person.

  Poppa just could not risk it any longer. Deciding rather to stay alive, we would had to wait until at least the arrival of early spring to make the final leg of our dire trek to freedom. We knew that with the onset of wintry weather, the likelihood was good that there would be no Germans searching for us, since we were now at least in the mountains. We would not have to continue to run. It would be pleasant to not to walk every day. We had to dig in for the winter, if we had any possibility at surviving at all. That meant shelters. Frankly, we were darned if we do, darned if we do not. We could not turn back, nor could we advance forward. We could not risk taking refuge in any of the towns; surely, the Germans would then find us. So quickly, had we turned into refugees in our own country? Therefore, you could see that our rag tag group could not afford to be caught especially not off guard, by either the Germans, or the elements.

  Before the snow got to be any deeper – it had been vital to our survival and a group of the men had gone out hunting for as much game as they possible kill and could bring back to their waiting family, and friend, God willing. Trying to hunt and kill the bigger animals, before they begin hibernating for the winter was imperative. The rest us began planning for our winter camp we so named “Little Jerusalem.” A true importance meaning to us all, we hoped this would lift our spirits, and give us hope.

  Mercifully, along the way here God provided us with the dozen horses - we purchased a week ago from a desperate farmer that wanted nothing more than to help us. After the purchase, we were able to use the horses for carrying our most frail along the way, allowing us to travel faster. As far as the use of the horses would also give their support to the hunting party by pulling back whatever large carcass they were able to get their hands on, such as bear, elk, or deer, of wolves, or fox all known to roam the area, God willing. The horses could be helpful by pulling logs to build our shelter.

  Two days after setting out on the hunt, the men bagged four elk, three deer, a dozen duck, and a fox. This was not going to be enough to carry us through the whole winter, but it certainly would go along ways.

  With the horses freed up, Poppa and four others trekked the fifteen-mile walk into the nearby village of Mate Ciche - they watched from the concealment of the nearby forest making sure they had not seen by any Germans. They did not want to draw attention to themselves, not sure, the people were going friendly to Jews still, or whom they could even trust anymore they could not take any chances - they had to be sure before they headed to stores, which were situated at the end of town. They watched the goings on of the town before heading in. They snuck through the woods with the horses, making their way to the store. If they were caught, then they could be shot, or hauled off - which would jeopardize the safety of the whole group. They made their way carefully to the store, one of the guys stayed with the horses, just in case it all went bad - then he could make it back to our people. Then one of the guys stood guard in front of the store. The other young man escorted Poppa. They all had their guns hidden. Poppa was perfect for this, he knew exactly how to talk to the storeowner, and he also knew how to fetch the best prices. They had to be sure there were not any Germans - he tried feeling out the storeowner. Then the storeowner assured them that the residents there still were friendly to Jewish population and that they did not like the Germans. He showed proof that he belonged to a resistance movement. It seemed we were not the only one escaping Poland. There had been a flood of Jews fleeing the country, coming through Mate Ciche. A network was recently set up that help aid the fleeing Jews. Before the Germans invaded, more than half the residents of Mate Ciche had been Jewish. Because so many people were now leaving Mate Ciche. The town was dying, the storeowners were more than glad to sell us anything we needed, even at a reduced prices.

  Poppa and the other men with him bought up as many vegetables as they could afford to spend on their tight budgets. Hoping these precious supplies would hold us all over, through the long winter that would lie ahead. Wi
th the swelling numbers of more than a hundred men, women, and children, it was clear that many provisions would be needed. They bought a sleigh to help drag the supplies the fifteen miles back, in the snow. They had planned to spend the night in the forest just out of town - it would be too far to go in one day.

  Most of the provisions acquired, were the most important staples - five, fifty- pound bags of wheat, twenty fifty-pound bags potatoes, five twenty-pounds bags of carrots, and the same in onions, and five, fifty-pound bags of cabbage.