Finding Kia

by Airicka Phoenix

  “I’m having another party and you’re going to be there.”

  In the process of stuffing my gym stuff into my bag, I glanced up, oddly not surprised to find Claudia there, but surprised to find her alone.

  “And why would I do that?” I pulled the drawstrings on my bag closed and stood to my full height, which was basically Claudia’s height thanks to the designer cinderblocks on her feet.

  “Because Adam will be there.” She smiled predatorily. “Don’t you want to see him again?”

  I swung my bag over my shoulder and glowered at her. “I can see him whenever I want.”

  Her neatly penciled eyebrow lifted. “So you two talk?”

  “Of course.”

  She folded her skinny arms and thrust out a hip. The posture screamed her challenge at me. “Then you’ve obviously told him all about your secret identity?”

  I faltered. “That’s none of your business.”

  Her smile reminded me of a very large cat moving in for the kill. “Oh, but it is my business, Kyra. You made it my business. I warned you what would happen if you got on my bad side.”

  I tried to follow her folded arms, hip thrust thing, but I wasn’t as coordinated so it looked more like I had to pee. “Well, you know what? I’m done playing this game with you. Leave me alone.” I shouldered past her.

  “I would!” she called after me. “But I’m enjoying this game of ours a little too much to stop now. Who knows what I’ll do next? Maybe I’ll tell everyone the truth, including Adam.”

  My fingers curled into fists at my sides. I turned. “What do you want?”

  She strolled casually towards me. “I want you to come to my party.”

  Exasperated, I threw out my arms and let them drop to my sides. “Why is that so important?”

  “Because that is where you are going to tell Adam to stop looking for you, to stop texting me about information on you. It’s getting tiresome. I want you to tell him to forget about you and instead, focus on someone else.”

  “Let me guess, Gena?”

  She flicked a strand of hair off her thin shoulder. “Me.”

  I would have laughed if she didn’t look so serious. “You? I thought you hand picked him for Gena.”

  She shrugged. “I did … originally. But you have made him very tempting and I realized I want him instead. Gena will find someone else.”

  I snorted. “Some friend you are.”

  “Friendship has nothing to do with it.” She took a step towards me. “It’s about winning. I have a very strong hatred for losing, especially to someone like you. So, do we have an agreement? You’ll come to my party and talk to Adam about abandoning this ridiculous notion of finding his Cinderella?”

  Anger had my fingers curling around my bag until my fingers ached. “And why would I do that?”

  With her cat eyes drilling into mine, Claudia reached into her back pocket and removed a slim device. She flipped it open and turned it so I could see the screen. There was a picture of me in the cafeteria, holding Adam’s tie. My heart dropped into my gut.

  “Where did you get that?” I knew with a hundred percent certainty that she had not been in the cafeteria that day, or I never would have removed the tie from my bag.

  Agilely, she snapped the phone closed and stowed it away in her pocket once more. “That doesn’t matter. What matters here is that I have proof in case you decide to play dumb or do anything else stupid. With one flick of a button, Adam and the rest of the school will get a nice long text about—”

  Fear and anger seized my voice. My stomach roiled. But I held my ground. “Maybe I don’t care, did you ever think of that?”

  Claudia laughed. “If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t look half sick right now. You do care. You know Adam will never want someone like you. Trust me. Hot guys like Adam never go for losers like you. The only reason he’s so adamant to find you now is because you were at my party and I only invite the desirable, which you are not. He thinks that if he removes the mask on his mystery love, he’ll find someone like me. Imagine how horrified he’d be to find out the girl he’s so desperately trying to find is his baby sister’s four-eyed freak of a friend. He’d be disgusted.”

  The words were a cold, hard slap of truth across the face. “Well, maybe I don’t want him anymore.”

  My fists twitched when she snorted. “Please. Don’t insult my intelligence or my ability to see. Unlike him, I’m not blinded by some stupid fantasy, because you could change every single thing about yourself, but you will always be a freak and Adam would never let himself be seen with the likes of you. Could you imagine what his friends would think? They’d all laugh at him. He’d be humiliated. Do you really want that?”

  From her doll purse, she flicked out a card with two fingers and held it out to me.

  I stared at it hard, unblinking, too afraid that if I so much as breathed wrong, the tears I was trying so desperately to contain would slip.

  “Go on,” she coaxed, swaying the card back and forth like a pendulum in front of my face. “If you do this, I promise never to bother you again.”

  Only I had to give up Adam. That was the catch. That was the sacrifice I had to make to keep my secret.

  I raised my head, pretty sure my hatred for her festered behind my eyes. “It is if I refuse to do it.”

  Her smile returned. “But you won’t. We both know you won’t, so let’s stop this silly game and focus on what’s important.”

  “If you hurt him—”

  “Hurt him?” She laughed. “I’m not the mafia!”

  “Aren’t you?”

  She continued to grin. “Adam will be fine. In fact, I can promise you that he will be more than fine.” Her smirk was disgusting. “I am very good at keeping my boys happy.”

  But did I want Adam to be fine and happy without me? Did I want him to forget me?

  She was holding out the card again. “Don’t be selfish, Kia. Do this for Adam. Do this for your little friend … Vanessa.”

  I ignored her sickly sweet coaxing. “What about Nessie?”

  Brown eyes blinked very slowly, with a great deal of deliberation, but there was a smug glint in them that made me want to break something. “Does she know you’re in love with her brother? How do you think she’ll feel when this news hits the whole school? Imagine the hurt and betrayal you’ll cause her, not to mention the social blow. I think it’s better if you just let me have him. We’re perfect together. Plus, unlike you, being with me will help his and Vanessa’s reputations, not ruin them. I won’t be a girlfriend he’s too embarrassed to introduce to his friends. I compliment him while you … you’re like the ugly purse dog no one wants. Now.” She held the card up again between two fingers. “Will you do it, or should I hit send?” Her eyes glinted viciously.

  I told myself it wasn’t such a big deal. That I could handle whatever Claudia dished out. It would be humiliating and degrading, but I would eventually leave the school and never again see any of those people. But then I thought of Nessie and how betrayed she’d feel. I couldn’t do that to her. I couldn’t hurt her like that.

  My gaze dropped to the card inches from my nose. My fingers lifted and took the thing. I felt the weight of it in my hand as heavy as the weight resting on my chest.

  Claudia smirked. “I knew you would see it my way.”

  With a tip of her chin, she whirled on her ice pick heels and flounced towards the door.

  “Claudia.”

  Her name escaped me before I even realized what I was doing. In a fluid flick of the wrist, I tossed the card back at her. It struck her shoulder and tumbled to the ground. Her horrified expression was nearly worth the grave I was digging as I crossed over to her. I stopped when my high tops squished into the pointy ends of her boots, making her yelp and stumble back. But I gave her no room. I leaned right into her perfectly made up face.

  “Threaten me again and I promise no one will ever find your body.”

  With her wide, brown eyes watching
me, I shouldered past her and left the change room.

  Chapter XIII

  Waving the White Rabbit

  I was going to tell Nessie and Adam everything. That was my plan for the stupid decision I’d made in the changing room with Claudia. It was the only thing I could think of to do to protect the only friend I had. It made no difference to me what other people thought of me, but I didn’t want Nessie to hate me. I didn’t want to hurt her.

  There was only one class left before the end of day. I just had to finish that before I could see Nessie again. I already had a plan formulated in my head of how I would tell her.

  I would ask to come over, then wait until Adam was there and tell them both at the same time, like ripping off a Band Aid. Or maybe I would tell them separately. It would be hard enough to see Adam’s disgusted face without tossing Nessie’s betrayed face into the mix. Whatever. I would tell them. I would get it over with. No more secrets. No more hiding. I was so not cut out for this.

  My last class of the day, French, ended with a slowness that astonished me. Granted, French never really sped by, but it had never been so grueling. I snatched up my things and bolted out in search of Nessie.

  She was the first out of her class, practically running right into me as she dashed out of English Lit. Her blue eyes widened in surprise.

  “Hey!” She grinned at me. “Where are you going in such a hurry?”

  Breathing hard from my marathon through the halls, I swallowed hard. “I was looking for you. I need to talk to you.”

  Nessie’s eyebrows lifted. “Okay, but can we please get out of this building? I think I’m getting a rash. Do you need to stop at your locker?”

  I shook my head, falling into step with her as we made our way to the front of the school.

  “Good. Me neither. That means we can just go! Oh, I’m under house arrest so Adam’s picking me up today. Do you want a ride?”

  “Yes!” I blurted a bit too loud. “That would be great.”

  “Awesome, but so you’re warned, Adam’s been in a total shit mood the last few weeks. I mean more than usual.”

  I frowned. “Why? What’s wrong?”

  Nessie shrugged. “He’s all pissy about some girl he met at this party he went to and, well, I don’t know the whole story, but basically she ditched him and he’s been trying like crazy to find her. He claims she’s the most gorgeous girl he’d ever seen in his life and he’s completely lost over her. I think it’s hilarious.”

  Torn between elation and annoyance, I glanced at her. “Why is that hilarious?”

  She laughed. “Because Adam is a total chick magnet. Any girl he wants, he gets. So one finally sunk her claws into him. Good for her I say. He deserves it.”

  “But he’s your brother.”

  “So? I think what she’s doing is good for him. Maybe it will help decrease the size of his ego.”

  Something like hope prickled the opaque cloud stuffed in my chest. “So you wouldn’t be upset if you ever found out who this girl was?”

  Nessie snorted. “No, why would I? It’s not like she’s anyone I know.”

  The weight shifted once more, smothering the fragile fingers of light. “But if you did know her?”

  “I would be pissed!” Nessie stopped and turned to me with a spark of rage behind her eyes. “Do you have any idea how insulting it is to find a friend and then realize the only reason she’s your friend is because she wants to screw your brother? It’s wrong. Adam can have any girl he wants, but not my friends. I’d never forgive either of them.”

  Devastated. There was no other name for the suffocating fingers curling around my throat, choking me. I had known Nessie would take it badly. I had known she would be upset, but did I want to lose her? And for what? Adam wanted the girl from Halloween. He wanted the beauty that danced in his arms and kissed him under the fairy lights. He didn’t want me. Not plan, ugly, sweater wearing Kia. What had I been thinking?

  We stopped on the front steps of the school, overlooking the parking lot and courtyard. I was still so wrapped up in my crushing misery that I jumped when Nessie elbowed me.

  “There’s Adam. Adam!” She went up on her tiptoes and waved her arm.

  My heart rocketed in my chest and it had nothing to do with how incredible he looked in his school uniform. Oh no. My entire body broke out in cold sweat because he wasn’t alone. With him, practically mashed right into his chest, was Claudia.

  “What is she doing?” I hadn’t meant to voice the question out loud, but it spilled free before I could stop it.

  “I don’t know but God could she get any closer?” Nessie said, lip curling back in disgust. “So gross. I do not want to see my brother getting groped right in front of me.”

  I wasn’t listening. I couldn’t hear a thing over the loud drumming in my ears. My stomach roiled like I’d just had one of Joanne’s quesadillas. I was pretty sure I was about to be sick.

  Then it got worse.

  Claudia pulled out something long from her pocket and held it up like a crimson snake. It took me two seconds to realize what it was.

  “No … no, no, no …”

  Adam’s eyes widened as he took the tie from her. He said something to her which she returned with a dainty shrug.

  “Hey, are you okay?” Nessie’s hand closed over my elbow and I realized I was doubled over, wheezing. “Adam!”

  “No …” But it was too late. He’d heard her this time. His head had turned in our directions. His eyes were fixed on us and the tie in his hand fluttered in the breeze. I felt physically sick. It couldn’t be possible. I had the tie on me, in my bag. I knew I did. But even as I ripped my bag off my shoulder and tore it open, I knew it wouldn’t be in there.

  “Kia?”

  Turning, I ran into the school, ignoring Nessie’s shouts calling me back. My high tops clapped loudly in the near silence as I dashed back to my locker. Sweat dampened my fingers as I fumbled with my lock. Numbers jumbled in my skull as I fought to concentrate. My heart hammered as I ripped open the door and stared inside, momentarily forgetting what I was looking for.

  I knew it wasn’t in there. It couldn’t be. I had it in my bag. I never took it out. There was no way I would have left it in my locker. Yet I desperately tore all my books out searching for it.

  It was gone. I couldn’t believe Claudia had gone into my bag and stolen it. But how? When? It made no sense. Then it dawned on me. The only time I left my bag unattended was in gym class. Nothing else made sense.

  “Misplace something, freak?” The sickly sweet voice raked down my spine like nails.

  I shakily got to my feet and turned to face Claudia’s smug expression. “You took it.”

  Claudia batted her big, brown eyes. “Took what?”

  “The tie!” I hissed through my teeth. “You stole it from my bag.”

  Her teeth flashed in a sneer. “Prove it.”

  Fury ripped through me as I closed the space between us. “What the hell do you want? What are you trying to prove, Claudia?”

  Unfazed, Claudia shrugged. “I want Adam.” She leered like an overgrown cat. “And I always get what I want.”

  Violence ragged in the pit of my stomach and made me want to ram her head into the wall. “What did you tell him?”

  Absentmindedly, she buffed her nails on the front of her suede jacket and studied the perfectly manicured talons fondly. “Just that his mystery love moved away and gave me the tie to return to him. She’s sorry she couldn’t stay, but she wanted him to be happy.”

  “That’s a lie,” I hissed, feeling my nails cut half-moons into the heels of my hands.

  “But he bought it.” She smirked. “We’re going out this weekend. I guess you didn’t steal his heart quite as thoroughly as you thought.”

  Tears burned behind my eyes, but I gritted my teeth, clenched my fists and willed them not to fall as I glowered at the beautiful snake in front of me. “Why are you doing this? You don’t love him.”

  Claudia shrugge
d daintily. “No.” Her lips coiled in the corners, reminding me of the Grinch after he’d gotten the brilliant idea to steal Christmas. “But you do and that’s good enough for me.”

  It was solely pride keeping me from throwing up on her shoes. “I’ll tell him,” I threatened. “I’ll tell him everything.”

  “What’s going on?”

  We both stiffened as a third voice penetrated our conversation. I didn’t need to look up to know who stood there, watching us, but I had no choice.

  Adam glanced from me to Claudia. His eyes found mine. “Kia?”

  Claudia cocked her head like a Cocker Spaniel in my direction. “Yeah, Kyra, what’s going on?”

  The challenge in her eyes fueled the rage in me. Her expression said very clearly that she didn’t think I had the guts to tell Adam. That I would back out, and I wanted to. Every fiber of my being ached to just slink back into the black hole I was used to. Then I looked into Adam’s eyes and I couldn’t do it. Even if he hated me, even if he was disgusted, I couldn’t let Claudia sink her claws into him.

  “I’m—”

  A figure moved into view behind Adam and the words shattered like glass in my throat. Nessie’s presence was a bucket of ice water being injected into my veins. At that moment, it no longer mattered that I wanted to crush in Claudia’s smug face. I had another whole reason why I would have to swallow my pride and my heart.

  “Kia?” Adam took a step forward, his eyes pleading for me to do something I suddenly couldn’t.

  I shook my head, my gaze fixed on Nessie, the only person who had ever given me a chance, the only person who had been my friend when I had no one. As much as I wanted Adam, as much as I cared for him, he was one guy in the scheme of things. I only had one friend. One real friend. No guy was worth losing that.

  “Nothing,” I whispered and all but felt the satisfaction wafting off Claudia in silky waves.

  I was admitting defeat and we both knew it.

  Adam’s frown deepened. He took another step towards me. “Wait … Kia—”

  “I’m sorry, Adam.” I bit my lip when it trembled. “I can’t.”