Worth It All

by Claudia Connor

  “Come here.” He reached for her hand and tugged until she leaned against his chest. He closed his arms around her and rested his chin on top of her head.

  The tension went up a notch as she battled with herself, then it seeped out of her slowly like a pin-pricked balloon. Her shoulders sagged and she leaned into him.

  She remained there against him for a full minute, proof of just how exhausted she really was.

  “Okay,” she finally agreed. “Thank you.”

  —

  Jake lived in a gated community, beautiful from what she could tell driving in. The yards were dark but filled with landscapes backlit with tiny garden lights. The backseat was quiet. Casey, her chaperone, her buffer, the one who allowed her to spend more time with Jake without losing her head, had fallen asleep halfway here.

  They entered quietly and Jake directed her to a guest room to lay Casey down. She told herself it wasn’t like she’d planned for this to happen. It was only eight thirty and who would have thought Casey would fall asleep? But two rounds of swimming and no nap? She shouldn’t be surprised. Boulder joined them and jumped up, making himself comfortable at the foot of the bed.

  Paige returned to the main room of Jake’s sprawling ranch-style house and found him standing at the stove. She stopped at the entrance to the kitchen, partly unsure what to do next, partly dead on her feet. “Hey.”

  “Hey. Is she asleep?”

  “Yes. With Boulder at the foot of the bed. Hope that’s okay.”

  “Sure. He usually sleeps with me. If she doesn’t mind, I don’t mind. Spaghetti okay? I already made the sauce. Shouldn’t take too long.”

  She smiled at the man who was becoming all too familiar. “Yes. Thank you.” And he cooked too. “I figured you for a man who ate out a lot.”

  “No. Not really. Just the diner,” he said, looking back at her over his shoulder with a sexy grin. “Though that wasn’t just about the food.”

  Good Lord. His brown eyes melted her from across the room and his voice finished her off. The man should be illegal. Just his presence brought life to places inside her body she didn’t even know could feel lively.

  He stalked across the room, not stopping until he was close enough she could smell him. He touched her cheek softly then laid his hands on her shoulders and gave them a squeeze. “You’re exhausted.” He kissed her temple.

  She was. She’d stayed up until almost one in the morning studying and had been on her feet almost ten hours straight.

  “Have a seat and I’ll pour you some wine.”

  He went back to the oven and she walked around the granite peninsula that divided the large, open room. Oversized brown leather furniture dominated the space and a giant flat-screen hung over the mantel. The walls were mostly bare except for a long built-in bookcase packed with books, no knickknacks.

  “Casey had chicken fingers in the dining hall. Did I tell you that?”

  “No, but thank you.”

  He returned and handed her a glass, but instead of pouring one for himself, he set the bottle of wine on the counter. “I even got her to eat some salad, which wasn’t easy. Turn around.”

  “Casey ate salad? Now I am impressed.” When she didn’t immediately obey, he turned her and she sighed as he went to work on her shoulders. His hands were so much better than wine, and she stared at her glass through tired eyes. In seconds, her eyelids fell closed and her chin dipped to her chest. “If I drink this, I won’t be able to drive home.”

  “So don’t drive home.”

  Tempting, so tempting. “How did you really make out today? Casey’s rarely quiet.”

  “It was fine. Better than fine and she had fun. We did the scans and she watched the machine make the 3-D mold. She thinks I’m magic now.”

  “Mmm.” His hands certainly felt like magic. “I think I may be too tired to eat.”

  “You work too hard.”

  She didn’t have the energy to argue and nearly whimpered when he pressed his thumbs deeper, slid them up the column of her neck. She couldn’t get used to this either, being taken care of. “Mmm.” A sound of ecstasy hummed through her.

  “I’ll be off in a couple of weekends.”

  He continued to rub and her head lolled. “I should get Casey home. I’m too tired to be productive.”

  “She’s asleep. It’s late.” He kissed the back of her head. “Stay. Let me feed you.”

  It would be nice to stay, too nice, but how many meals had he already provided? She had her budget worked down to the penny. She wouldn’t use him, depend on him. But she wanted to be here. “I feel icky. I’m sure I smell like the diner.”

  “You don’t look icky.” His hands moved down her arms, then back to her shoulders before he nuzzled her neck, then up her throat. “You don’t smell icky.” He kissed her behind her ear, nibbled on her earlobe, and her body zinged to life. “But why don’t you take a shower before you eat if it’ll make you feel better? Use my bathroom so you don’t wake Casey.”

  Just because she stayed didn’t mean anything was going to happen. She’d be smart not to let it. Smarter if she left now and made sure of it.

  He pressed a soft kiss to her head again. “Stay.”

  “Okay.” It was impossible to say no. She didn’t want to say no.

  Jake’s bathroom smelled like him, fresh and male and woodsy with a lingering scent of his aftershave. That scent reminded her of those minutes in her kitchen and just the memory made the blood pulse hard between her legs.

  The hot spray reminded her of his massaging fingers, and when she closed her eyes, breathed in the scent of his shampoo, she could almost imagine him there with her. Both of them naked, both of them wet.

  Like she was naked now, in his shower, with Jake just a room away.

  After ten minutes under the pounding, high-pressure showerhead, she stepped out, warm and loose, a little tingly and a lot nervous. She towel-dried her hair, ran her fingers through it. Thinking to slip out to her car for a T-shirt and shorts, she wrapped the towel around her body and opened the door into Jake’s bedroom. And came face-to-face with the object of her fantasies.

  Chapter 16

  They both froze and the sound of her own blood pulsed in her ears.

  “Sorry. I wanted to make sure you had a towel, but…” Hot, appraising eyes took in her bare shoulders and barely covered body. “I can see that you do.”

  A drop of water fell from her hair and slipped beneath the edge of the towel between her breasts. Jake watched it disappear.

  “Feel better?” His voice was thick and raspy and his eyes came back to hers.

  “Yes.” The word came out a breathless whisper because she couldn’t breathe. The man was large, intense, and his brown eyes burning into hers made it hard to swallow, impossible to move. He exuded sex but for long, silent seconds he just looked at her while her heart raced, unsure what he would do next.

  She wanted his lips on hers, his hands running over bare skin. She wanted this, wanted to be touched, to feel alive and free, and not full of worry and fear and guilt. Mostly she wanted Jake.

  The muscles in his jaw tensed with barely contained restraint and he looked down at her from hot and heavy eyes. Finally, he raised his hand and traced one rough finger along her collarbone, making every nerve fire as he went.

  “Tell me to stop.”

  “No.”

  He continued along the edge of the towel, his knuckles just brushing the top of each breast. “Paige. You’re tired.”

  “I’m not that tired. Please. Just this once.” She needed him, right now. Needed his kiss, needed the way she felt in his arms. Like for once she wasn’t racing toward something wonderful that always seemed to move farther away, but was already grasping it.

  With a simple tug, she untucked the edge of the towel where it wrapped around and let it drop to the floor at her feet.

  Jake sucked in a deep breath, and she watched as his eyes burned her naked body. Starting at her feet and pausing between her l
egs, then her breasts, he continued up until his gaze met hers. Her nipples tingled at the thought of his touch, but he didn’t touch them.

  Instead he framed her face in his big hands and traced the crease of her lips with his tongue, silently asking for entrance. The answer was yes. Utterly and completely, yes. He kissed her long and deep, making love to her mouth until the only thing holding her up was his arm banded around her back.

  Her nipples rasped against his cotton shirt, her thighs against his jeans. She needed his clothes off, wanted to feel his hot flesh against her own, but then his hand moved lower, slipped between her legs and she couldn’t speak. He devastated her with his kiss and his touch until she was trembling in his arms. When he lifted her off her feet and to the bed, she was on fire, begging.

  Still clothed, he braced himself over her, his hands planted on either side of her head and a reckless craving burst inside of her. He was so beautiful, so male with his hard body, but with soft eyes that reached right out and touched her heart.

  She pulled at his shirt, sighed when her hands found skin. Then sighed again when he stripped it over his head. His body rippled with strength she yearned to explore. And she did. His sculpted abs and chest, his broad shoulders and powerful arms. Before she was finished, he took her hands and pinned them above her head. His eyes burned into hers and a fiery heat curled low in her belly.

  Then he surprised her by reaching out and gently brushing the hair back from her face. If she thought sex with Jake would be fast and powerful, she was wrong. Wrong about the fast, but Jake’s touch was powerful in a way that took over all her senses, her thoughts, her breath.

  “God, Paige. Do you have any idea how badly I want you?”

  He kissed her again while his hands roamed every inch of her body. His slow exploration left nothing undiscovered, and she turned to liquid under his skilled hands.

  She clutched at his shoulders, speared her fingers into his hair, and held on when he turned his attention to her breasts. He drew them into his mouth, licked, played, and teased until she was at the edge. It was all new, all of it and only for Jake. His hand skated down, tracing a line over her stomach, skipping the important parts and caressing the inside of her thighs until she wanted to scream.

  He teased her for what seemed like hours, showing her all the ways and places he could touch her. With his long, skilled fingers between her legs, he brought her to the edge until she was crying out at the unfamiliar pressure building inside her.

  She whimpered when he slid away to leave a slow, damp trail of kisses from her breast to her mound. With her body quivering under his lips, he whispered as he went, words of patience and all he was going to do to her. His wide shoulders forced her thighs open to him, and he did all those things and more, showing her an entirely new kind of pleasure until she did cry.

  —

  JT took a condom from a dresser drawer, and sat on the side of the bed to strip out of his pants, removing his prosthesis as he went. He had a split second of indecision about putting his leg back on then he looked back at Paige, let his eyes roam over her curves laid out for him in the soft lamplight, and he stopped thinking.

  He rolled on the condom with Paige watching him, her eyes dark with desire and her sexy mouth curved in a contented smile. Coming over her, he kissed her shoulder and across her chest until her eyes fluttered closed. Her face was flushed and he got a deep satisfaction knowing it was from him. “You’re so beautiful.” Her skin was hot and damp from earlier, and he licked a path along her neck, sighing at the taste of her.

  He hadn’t even been inside her yet and already nothing else compared. He drew her breast into his mouth, feasted on one, then the other, and finally found her sweet mouth again. He’d never gone slow, never taken his time to explore a woman’s body. He’d never wanted to. Until Paige. Even knowing they were both more than ready, he held off, drawing it out until she was begging. When he rested his lips at her pulse, he felt her heartbeat racing, felt her tremble.

  He raised his head and lightly skimmed the back of his hand over her cheek. Paige might be tough, but she was also soft, so soft. “I won’t hurt you.”

  “I know.”

  He kissed her cheeks, her temple, then stared deep into her eyes, knowing more than anything he wanted her trust.

  “You’re shaking.” He rested his forearms on either side of her head and studied her face. “I know you’ve done this before.”

  She half smiled at his obvious statement. “It’s been a long time.”

  “How long?”

  “It was only that once,” she said softly, not looking at him.

  “Paige.” Just once and she’d gotten pregnant and given up being a young and carefree girl to become the woman he was falling for. He kissed her again, slowly, tenderly, wishing he’d been that one other time. “You can still tell me to stop.”

  She took his face in her hands. “I don’t want you to stop. Please.”

  His eyes never left hers when he finally pushed inside and joined their bodies. Her breath hitched, her eyes widened, and he knew the look on her face was something he’d remember for the rest of his life. A touch of pain and so much sweet desire he almost lost it right then. She’d said just once, but hadn’t he already known once would never be enough?

  He paused. “Okay?”

  “Yes. So okay.”

  Her answer was half whisper, half sigh, and he pressed his hips into hers, going deeper until he could go no farther. They stared at each other, looking deeper than he’d ever looked into another person. When she would have moved, he pinned her body to the mattress with his own.

  “Please.” Her short nails dug into his shoulders, and she brought her legs higher on his hips, dug her heels into the back of his thighs.

  “Another second,” he panted. Sweat trickled down his back. He stretched her arms above her head and linked their fingers, and kissed her, wanting to keep her just like this, wanting it to last forever.

  When he finally started to move, it was a perfect slow dance. She moved with him, their bodies molded together, his eyes never leaving hers.

  “Please. Please. Please.”

  It was her anthem, becoming more and more desperate. So close and so was he.

  “Let go, Paige. Just let go.”

  She did. Her eyes glazed over and she surrendered to him, crying out her release, and in that moment there was no past, no mistakes, no guilt. Just Paige. And the sound of his name whispered on her lips pushed him over the edge.

  Chapter 17

  It was a little after seven in the morning when JT went back to the bedroom to check on Sleeping Beauty and found her up and getting dressed. She was facing away from him, her panties already on and in the process of slipping into her blouse. He wanted to strip both of them off. “Hey.”

  Her hands stilled, but she didn’t turn. “Want some breakfast?”

  “I can’t,” she said, not moving, not turning around. “I’m…um…supposed to be at the diner at eight. I can’t be late. Where’s Casey?”

  Her voice was scratchy, her words halting, and he stepped farther into the room. “She’s in the kitchen. Eating pancakes.”

  “Thank you.”

  Her back was still to him, but he could see the tension in her body, could practically feel it permeating the room.

  “Paige. Look at me.”

  “I can’t do that either.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. I can’t afford to let go any more than I already did.”

  She’d taken a leap with him, stepped way off her imaginary line, and now she was scrambling back. She pulled up her shorts, her fingers furiously buttoning the very top button of her blouse, and he wondered if that was a mistake, her obvious nerves, or if she was subconsciously protecting herself.

  She finally faced him and took her time meeting his gaze. Looking at her standing there, barefoot in his bedroom, hair tousled, lips berry red and looking well kissed, his heart pounded with each passing second. His skin felt tight, rememb
ering all the ways he’d touched her, how their bodies had come together.

  He hadn’t let more than a breath of space between them all night, and he didn’t want this space between them now. All he wanted to do was make love to her again, but she looked defeated, guilt-ridden. All the magic of the night before was gone. The carefree Paige was gone. “Do you regret it?”

  Their eyes met and she looked incredibly young, innocent and uncertain. “Do you?”

  No. He didn’t regret it. He regretted that she was leaving, that he couldn’t figure out how to say exactly what he was feeling. That a night with him had caused her more stress, had made the weight on her shoulders heavier instead of lighter.

  She grabbed her shoes and made a dash for the door.

  “Paige, wait. I don’t—”

  “I have to go.” She moved to push past him, but he stopped her with a hand on her arm.

  “Paige.”

  “Jake, I have to go. Please.” Her eyes pleaded with him. “Casey, honey, get your shoes. We’re late.”

  “Look at Boulder! I syruped his nose.”

  Paige didn’t look at Boulder before heading out to her car. He stood back while Paige got Casey settled in the back. He wondered about her car, the oil, the tires, suddenly remembering all the things his dad used to do for his mom and sister. He wanted to do that for Paige.

  She closed the door and he waved goodbye to Casey, wondering what else he could say to make this better. She was already stressed. Telling her all he felt, all he wanted, would only add to it. “I’ll come by tonight.”

  “I have class. And I have to study.”

  Shit. “I’m sorry. I promised you—”

  “It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I forgot. I was irresponsible.”

  Because she’d done something for herself, or because she’d taken a chance with him, or both. He reached for her.

  “Jake, I have to go. I can’t be late.” She covered her face with her hands then dropped them to her side. “I’m sorry.”

  She looked on the verge of tears and it killed him not to kiss her, but she was already climbing behind the wheel, rushing, worrying.