The Library War

by Cecily Wolfe

  A group of kids, preschoolers to elementary school age, were standing beneath a huge bubble that stuck out at the end of the tube crawl, pointing and laughing. Maya looked up and found Conner, his face not quite pressed against the plastic, his eyes huge. He wasn’t moving, or even looking down at her or the kids.

  “Do you know that guy? Is he a scaredy cat or something?”

  A little boy grabbed at her hand and tugged, pulling her attention away from the sheer terror on Conner’s face. Conner had never liked small or cramped spaces, so she wondered why in the world he would have crawled up into the tube in the first place.

  “Is that your friend? Is he claustrophobic? I feel so bad, that’s my daughter he went in to help.”

  Maya looked up again and noticed, this time, a small girl with her tiny hands pressed against the bubble below Conner. She was smiling, though, unlike him, and Maya frowned as the woman continued to speak. Did Conner see her down there?

  “Jessie went in before I could catch her, and then she started crying. That boy saw her up there and just went in after her. She’s too young to go in by herself, but she seems fine now.”

  It was true. The little girl was slapping her hands against the plastic bubble and looking up at Conner, who was still frozen. Maya rolled her eyes. What an idiot, she thought, shaking her head.

  “I guess I’ll go in and see what’s going on,” she told the girl’s mother, and against her better judgement, with plans for a hot shower involving bleach afterwards, she had crawled up after them both.

  Conner had been in some sort of shock as the two of them followed little Jessie back down through the tunnels, and while the mother had been grateful for Conner’s help, Maya saw the concern in her eyes at Conner’s mostly unbelievable reassurance that he was okay.

  “That was one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever done, I hope you know.”

  Maya tried to talk him out of it, but it took a party hat, forced on him by one of the kids Maya was babysitting, and a party horn, blown directly into his face by a child neither of them knew, to break his daze.

  “Thanks for the rescue. I owe you one.”

  He wasn’t his usual goofy self at that moment, but serious, his dark eyes intense as he looked into her own. Thinking back on it now, Maya wondered if there hadn’t been an impulse to kiss him even back then, in spite of the screaming kids and obnoxious, kid-friendly music playing on a loop around them.

  How had she known he was in trouble? Just a feeling, was all, and a very physical, intense feeling at that. She imagined that the birds used silent communication between them as they flew into their formations and stayed together, just like she wanted to stay with Conner.

  But did he want to stay with her?

  Conner regretted not eating lunch when his stomach started growling about an hour later.

  “Hey, do you want some chocolate?”

  The girl sitting behind him poked him between his shoulder blades as she whispered close to his head, confirming that the growl had been loud enough for others to hear. Before he could decline her offer, a full-sized candy bar, with almonds, no less, slid over his shoulder. It was a little creepy.

  “Uh, no thanks,” he whispered, trying to push the candy back to her. It fell on her desk, and he looked around to find several faces staring straight at him. The girl behind him giggled.

  This day really needed to end. But when it did, there would be a long walk with Maya, and an even longer volunteer shift at the library. Together.

  All of that would be better than trying to explain to the teacher why he was giving a candy bar to someone during class.

  That was nothing next to what followed in the classes afterward.

  “Hey, are you and Trinity dating now? What about Kaylie?”

  “I heard you were passing out candy to girls in Peterson’s class. It isn’t even Valentine’s Day, bro.”

  “What’s with you and Trinity? Are you taking her to prom instead of Kaylie now?”

  The questions came faster than he could answer, so he stopped talking and just shook his head at everyone who approached him, either in class or the halls.

  “Word is that you and Trinity Davis are engaged. Don’t bother inviting me. She’s so pushy.”

  Conner would recognize the voice behind him at his locker anywhere. When he turned to find Maya struggling to hold back a smile, the relief that washed over him was like a balm to his soul.

  She was teasing him, as if nothing had happened between them, and while he didn’t want either of them to forget that kiss, finding their way back to their old easiness together was a journey he wanted to take more than any other.

  “She said no. I didn’t have a ring on me, and I guess that’s a requirement.” he shrugged, stepping up beside her and leaning into her as they walked down the hall, just to see if she would move away. She didn’t, and he let himself relax.

  “All those Hallmark Channel movies say so. At least I think they do. My mom’s coworkers swear by them.”

  Conner knew that Maya’s mother didn’t have time to watch TV, but the popularity of a certain kind of movie had been a topic of conversation for the past few years. The two of them had tried to watch one of them together, just to see if they were missing anything, and when Conner’s mom checked on them, she stayed, sitting on the sofa between them, and ended up in tears.

  “We’ll try again in about thirty years,” Maya had promised Conner’s mother, when his mother had been surprised that the movie hadn’t affected them at all.

  Thirty years. Back then Maya had assumed they would be friends so far into the future. Did she still want that now?

  “What’s this I hear about another prom date? Is Trinity tagging along, too?”

  Kaylie’s smile was brighter than Maya’s, and Conner knew she was joking. He was always amazed at how fast rumors spread through their school, although it was smaller than a lot of other high schools in the area. As long as Kaylie and Maya didn’t believe that anything was going on between him and Trinity, it didn’t matter.

  “Seriously, you refused a chocolate bar, with almonds, in Peterson’s class? What’s wrong with you?”

  Jason appeared, sounding shocked as he spoke, as if the very idea was horrifying.

  “Now that is the only true thing I’ve heard about what happened all afternoon. Yes, it had almonds, and I gave it back to her,” he explained, as Jason, Kaylie, and Maya looked at him. They stopped at the front doors, off to the side so other students could get by.

  “Wait a minute,” Maya took a step back with one hand out, palm facing Conner as if to ward him off. “This involved a chocolate bar, which you didn’t accept? Are you serious?”

  Jason laughed again, and Conner felt his own eyes narrow as he noticed that Jason was standing very close to Maya. Closer than Conner would have liked him to be.

  He needed to get over that, if he was going to spend prom night with the two of them, when dancing would be expected and touching was bound to happen. Besides, Maya wouldn’t let Jason do anything she didn’t want him to do, and she had proven that to him on Friday night.

  Conner had to keep himself from touching his cheek, remembering the sting of that slap.

  “I can see that you’ve realized your mistake,” Kaylie offered, leaning forward and catching Conner’s eye. She raised her eyebrows, as if she knew his mind had been wandering.

  “Yeah, well, my stomach was growling, and all of a sudden she was shoving this candy bar in my face. Before I knew what was happening, Peterson was all over me, Trinity was giggling, and half an hour later we’re apparently riding off into the sunset together.”

  Conner shook his head as he explained. Jason nodded sympathetically.

  “Everyone’s watching, all the time. Don’t people have something better to talk about in this school?”

  Before Jason finished saying school, Trinity appeared at Conner’s elbow.

  “Sorry if I embarrassed you. Just trying to help.”

 
; She smiled and held up the candy bar.

  “Anyone else want it?”

  Maya and Jason both reached for it at the same time, laughing as their hands collided. Jason let Maya take it, and Trinity waved with a laugh as she walked away. Maya broke the bar in half before she tore the wrapper open, tilting it towards Jason.

  “You sure?” he asked, holding his hand up, reaching into the shiny wrapper only after Maya nodded.

  “We should go,” she spoke to Conner, and he realized that he had been staring, watching their interaction too closely not to be noticed.

  “Yeah, right. The library waits for no one. Books to shelve, toys to clean up . . .”

  Kaylie was watching him with that look she had, like she wasn’t buying whatever he was saying. She was too observant, and Conner hadn’t been careful enough when it came to hiding his feelings for Maya. It was common knowledge that girls bonded or whatever when they shopped together, but he didn’t think Maya was the bonding-with-other-girls type. At least he hoped she wasn’t, or that Kaylie wouldn’t say anything about her observations when the girls went shopping together.

  “See you tomorrow, guys.”

  Maya waved, and Jason and Kaylie smiled as they waved back. Conner just nodded at them, following Maya and hoping that he didn’t do or say anything wrong on the way to the library to wreck what had mysteriously fixed itself over the past few hours.

  Chapter Twenty Two

  Even with a prom date and only a few weeks left of school, Conner still inspired girls to throw themselves at him.

  Maya hadn’t been surprised at hearing the candy bar story, first from Stacey, a girl she had played soccer very badly with back in third grade for about two weeks, and then from Desirae, a very popular cheerleader and volleyball captain who usually acted as if Maya didn’t exist.

  Unless Conner was with her, of course, and then Desirae was as friendly as a talk show host.

  After that, Maya lost count of who told her and what exactly was said. Most of it had something to do with Conner and Trinity Davis, and chocolate.

  That was enough to get some of the boys laughing. She didn’t want to consider what they were imagining. When Mialie Harper, who wrote for the school newspaper, approached Maya with a very unsuccessful hush-hush gesture, calling her over to a corner in the hallway where everyone walking by could see them, Maya almost slapped her for suggesting that Trinity was pregnant.

  Some people had too much free time, and much too big mouths.

  She could never tell Conner what Mialie had said. It was ridiculous and hurtful, to both Trinity and him.

  As she walked with him, headed to the library as they had thousands of days after school before, she tugged on the straps of her backpack mindlessly. After all that drama, she and Jason had gotten the better of it all, sharing the candy in less than a minute, and for all her worries about keeping him and Kaylie happy, the two of them seemed content.

  Except Kaylie’s careful study of both her and Conner was a little unsettling.

  A lot of people thought Kaylie was too beautiful to be smart, but that’s where they were wrong. Kaylie kept her thoughts to herself for the most part, and while she and Maya weren’t close friends, Maya had worked with her on class projects, getting to know her well enough to see that there was more to her than a pretty face and sweet smile.

  Hopefully Kaylie didn’t figure out that she and Conner were having problems or issues or whatever anyone wanted to call them.

  “What did you bring us for a snack today? Maybe you should just have some now, since you didn’t eat earlier.”

  She didn’t look at him as she asked, keeping her thumbs underneath her backpack straps as she waited for his answer. This would usually be the time she skipped ahead of him and turned around, talking with him face to face as she walked backwards.

  Walking backwards with her head full of worries and questions wasn’t a good idea right then. She knew the sidewalks and streets better than anyone, but if there was ever a time when she felt as if she wasn’t in tune with everything, it was now.

  “My mom shoved some cereal bars, the ones you hate, and some Rice Krispy treats in there. Probably before I woke up. Otherwise, there would be nothing.”

  She couldn’t stand those mushy cereal bars his mom always had sitting around, supposedly to encourage them to eat something healthy. His mom knew her well enough to understand that to Maya, ice cream sandwiches and Doritos were food groups in and of themselves.

  “Why not? Trying to starve me into submission?”

  The words slipped out before Maya could think through them, but when she heard them out loud, she cringed. She was teasing, of course, but there was an edge to her words.

  Conner smiled at her, and she caught it with a glance. It was a small smile, a little sad, and she knew that she was the one who had made him feel that way. She sucked in a breath against the tears building up behind her eyes. She never wanted to hurt him.

  Slapping him really didn’t fit into that plan, though, did it?

  “I was kind of distracted this morning, so our snack wasn’t a priority.”

  He didn’t sound angry. His voice was quiet and clear.

  “What about you?”

  His question caught her off guard. She shrugged and walked faster so she was a few steps ahead of him, where he couldn’t see her face.

  She chewed on her bottom lip and forced herself to stand up straighter.

  “I’m sorry I slapped you.”

  As she waited for him to respond, she felt his body move closer to hers, first behind her for a few moments, and then beside her. He didn’t speak, and she didn’t look at him.

  They had a good fifteen minutes before they reached the library, but it felt like hours. A bird called out, and another bird answered in the silence, and Maya was reminded of her thoughts as she watched the birds in formation earlier that day.

  “Hey.”

  It was just one word, but the sound of his voice along with her thoughts, her hopes, that they could again be like those birds, comfortable with each other, knowing each other like no one else could, allowed her to release the straps of her backpack and let her arms free, hanging down at her sides where Conner took one of her hands in his own.

  It wasn’t the first time they had held hands, but of the hundreds of times it had happened before, this time forged a connection that Maya needed more than any other. She couldn’t help but smile as she waited for him to continue.

  “I’m sorry I kissed you without asking first. That wasn’t right. I think, though, that we need to talk about some things before they get out of hand again.”

  The kissing part was still a mystery, both as to his motive, and his reasoning afterwards. It wasn’t something she wanted to revisit right now, especially since she had decided that all of this indecipherable drama between them should wait until after the prom.

  Ideally, some of it would work out along the way. She didn’t want to avoid the problems, but was hopeful. It was a good way of thinking about it, about their relationship, and once she had decided on it, she didn’t want to turn back.

  Clearly Conner needed to hear about her idea, and of course he would agree. It only made sense. Why ruin the end of senior year with a fight over a job, one that he would, soon, she hoped, realize was a better fit for her and not him?